Carmen Lopez
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Quotes for
Carmen Lopez (Character)
from "George Lopez" (2002)

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"George Lopez: Girl Fight (#2.15)" (2003)
Angie Lopez: I'm gonna call Adam's parents about this window right now.
Carmen Lopez: Adam didn't do it. Piper did.
George Lopez: Piper? That snob who used to be your friend?
Carmen Lopez: That's her handwriting. I know because she wrote "Carmen Can't Say No-pez" on my locker.
Benny: Hey, thank God our last name isn't Tucker.

Benny: [rushing into the house] Hey, you've been pranked!
George Lopez: Not now, Mom!
Benny: No, I just want to see what it says.
[pulls open the blinds]
Benny: I couldn't read it backwards.
[opens the blinds to reveal the words "Carmen Hopez" spray painted on the sliding door]
Carmen Lopez: Oh, God.
Benny: Now I get it.

George Lopez: [When Carmen comes home from school all bruised up] Carmen, what happened?
Carmen Lopez: I got in a fight with Piper. She kept calling me a slut, then she pushed me.
Angie Lopez: Oh, my God. Are you all right? You have blood on you.
Carmen Lopez: That's Piper's.
George Lopez: Really?
Carmen Lopez: Yeah, I punched her in the nose.
George Lopez: Damn! My girl's a scrapper! Whoo!

Benny: [when she walks in the kitchen] Hey, what's going on?
George Lopez: Carmen got in a fight, Mom.
Benny: [to Carmen] Whoa. Look, you got blood on you.
Carmen Lopez: It's the other girl's.
Benny: Damn! My granddaughter's a scrapper!
[Angie stares at her]
George Lopez: Mom, we don't encourage violence in this house.
[he and Benny give each other a low-five]

Adam Connors: [as he throws stones at Carmen's window to get her attention] Carmen! Carmen!
George Lopez: [to Carmen] Are you supposed to be sneaking out tonight? 'Cause I can go.
Carmen Lopez: It's Adam.
George Lopez: The guy who gave you the hickey? Carmen, we told you you weren't allowed to see him.
Carmen Lopez: Dad, I know. I broke up with him, but he won't leave me alone. He won't stop coming by, he won't stop calling. He says he's in love with me.
George Lopez: [laughs] Really, why?
Carmen Lopez: He says I'm special.
George Lopez: Ha. no. Come on. Really. Why?
Adam Connors: [as he continues to throw stones at the window] Carmen!
George Lopez: All right. I'll handle this.
Carmen Lopez: Dad, be careful. He's on the water polo team.
George Lopez: I'll try not to fight him in the tub.

Angie Lopez: [to Carmen] Don't worry, honey. We're gonna take care of this.
George Lopez: But you still have to go to school today.
Carmen Lopez: No!
George Lopez: Yes. Carmen, you can't let them intimidate you.
[Carmen looks at Angie, who agrees with George]
Carmen Lopez: Fine. Get ready to clean more windows.
[leaves the house]

Piper Morey: Carmen, where are you going?
Carmen Lopez: Home.
Piper Morey: Hold on. We heard someone wrote "Hopez" on your house and we felt really bad, so we got you a little present.
[hands her a gift bag; Carmen opens the gift bag and takes out a pillow]
Piper Morey: It's a pillow so you'll be more comfortable. You know, with all that time you spend on your back.
Carmen Lopez: Screw you, Piper.
Piper Morey: What?
[pushes Carmen; Carmen looks at Piper angrily and pushes her back which causes them to start fighting with each other]

George Lopez: Carmen, good news.
Angie Lopez: You're not suspended. Piper is.
George Lopez: You can go back to school. Mr. Durango's gonna make sure none of the kids ever mess with you again.
Carmen Lopez: I'm not going back.
Angie Lopez: Carmen, everything is gonna be better now. Adam's gonna tell everyone that he lied.
Carmen Lopez: You don't understand. It's too late. I'm the school whore now.
Angie Lopez: Carmen, I think you're getting a little carried away.
[Carmen walks over to the answering machine and turns it on]
Teenage Boy: [over the answering machine] Yeah. This is Jason. I'd like to leave a message for the school whore.
[he and another kid start laughing]
George Lopez: Who are those boys? I'll get 'em suspended.
Carmen Lopez: [in tears] Then suspend everybody! You know what else happened today? A boy followed me in the bathroom and asked me if I wanted to do it!
Angie Lopez: [as she tries to comfort Carmen] Honey...
Carmen Lopez: Another boy pulled up my shirt when I was walking down the hall!
Carmen Lopez: Please don't make me go back. Please!
[hugs George as she cries]
George Lopez: It's okay, baby. We'll figure something out. Go upstairs so your mom and I can talk.
[Carmen heads upstairs]
Angie Lopez: She's not wrong. She can never get her reputation back.
George Lopez: I don't want to see her suffer like this for three more years.
Angie Lopez: Me either. What are you thinking?
George Lopez: Private school.
Angie Lopez: That's what I was thinking. Can we afford it?
George Lopez: No. We'll have to sell the boy.

"George Lopez: Landlord Almighty (#4.2)" (2004)
Carmen Lopez: You know, I still have my bag packed upstairs.
Angie Lopez: Then go get it.
Carmen Lopez: You don't mean that.
Angie Lopez: Yeah, I do. Because having you stay out all night at parties is no different than having you run away.

Carmen Lopez: [about the mannequin in the wall] The mannequin represents my spirit trying to get out of a spiritual prison.
George Lopez: Is your spirit so dumb, it can't use the door?

George Lopez: [to Carmen] You want to be treated like an adult?
Carmen Lopez: Uh, yeah.
George Lopez: Okay, the rent's due the first of the month.

Angie Lopez: Carmen, your mail came, there's something from a school and a letter from Toby and two pieces of junk mail.
[holds up a plate with 2 pizza slices]
Carmen Lopez: Thank you, thank you...
George Lopez: Angie!
Angie Lopez: [gives Carmen the plate] Run up to your room and eat your mail.

Angie Lopez: And you do all this... for nursing school?
Carmen Lopez: Why would she need to go to school? She's a dancer and a model.
Taylor: Yeah, I'm like a triple threat.

Carmen Lopez: [to Taylor] My dad's making me pay rent!
George Lopez: Yeah, landlord and a dad, I'm like a triple threat.

Carmen Lopez: You know, I still have my bag upstairs.
Angie Lopez: Then go get it.
Carmen Lopez: You don't mean that.
Angie Lopez: Yeah, I do, because having you out all hours of the night is no different than having you run away. We need to know where you are and that you're safe.

"George Lopez: George Searches for a Needle in a Haight-Stack (#4.1)" (2004)
George Lopez: [to Carmen] You're not going out tonight.
Carmen Lopez: I get it, it's too soon. I'll just go to bed, but I want you to know things aren't the same. I partied with Chingy and I shared a sandwich with a homeless guy. I've done it all. So no more curfews, no more rules, I'm an adult, and tomorrow night, I'm going out.
George Lopez: [to Angie] She's right. Things aren't the same, they're worse.

George Lopez: [to Carmen] You were in a hotel room alone with Zack. I think I know what happened.
Carmen Lopez: You think I had sex with Zack? Well, I didn't. He tried to get me to, but I wouldn't.
George Lopez: How stupid do you think I am? It's San Francisco. They got men and women, women and women, men and men. Sabs que, it's a free-for-all up there!
Carmen Lopez: Nothing happened! He tried to get me drunk. I wouldn't do that, either. Okay, what do you want to do? You want to take me to a doctor and test me? I'm still a virgin.
George Lopez: They have a test? We'll go right now. What time is it, 9:00? We'll go to the urgent care.
Carmen Lopez: Dad! I didn't do anything.
George Lopez: Don't lie to me!
Carmen Lopez: I didn't! You raised me better than that.
George Lopez: No, I didn't. I worked too hard, I lost my temper. I was way too tough on you.
Carmen Lopez: Yeah, you were, but whenever Zack wanted to do something, I kept hearing your voice: "Don't do anything you'd be ashamed to tell me or Mom about."

Carmen Lopez: [to George] You were right about Zack. He was only after one thing.
George Lopez: You know, baby, I wish I could say the same thing, but I'm always going to be right.

Carmen Lopez: [to George] You have issues.
George Lopez: You know, you're damn right I have issues. I try to give you everything I never had and you run away from it.
Carmen Lopez: Oh, yeah, I have everything. I have a father and a mother who treat me like a baby and control everything I do.

Angie Lopez: [about Carmen] George! Remember the literature? She's home safe and sound. We should be happy now.
George Lopez: Angie, don't try to pretend everything's all right. It wasn't all right last night when you were crying.
Carmen Lopez: Maybe you should have thought of that when you told me to leave.
Angie Lopez: Stop it!

Carmen Lopez: [to Angie] I'm sorry, Mom.
Angie Lopez: Well, it's all over now. You're home, huh? I am not going to hammer you with questions. You want some tea, honey? Sugar, cream? Are you a woman now? Cookie?

"George Lopez: I Only Have Eyes for You (#2.21)" (2003)
Carmen Lopez: [discovers Max is peeking on Olivia through a hole in Carmen's wall] So what do you think of my little brother?
Olivia: He's cute.
Carmen Lopez: Yeah, too bad about his eye.
Olivia: What's wrong with his eye?
Max Lopez: [Carmen sprays perfume into the hole] OW!

George Lopez: Come on, Carmen, let's go for a ride.
Carmen Lopez: [suspiciously] Am I coming back?
George Lopez: As long as you're a tax deduction, you will always be safe in my home.

George Lopez: Why're you crying?
Carmen Lopez: Because I'm so happy!
George Lopez: [crying too] I got you a cellphone to make everything better, stop crying!

George Lopez: I was a boy so I get why Max peeped, but I don't get you anymore. I did when you were little because you were just like a little boy, except you never got caught in your zipper.
Carmen Lopez: Well I'm not a little boy or little girl anymore and I'd like to have my feelings respected.

"George Lopez: Love Bites (#2.8)" (2002)
Max Lopez: Have you been wrestling?
Carmen Lopez: No, why?
Max Lopez: You got a big purple bruise on your neck.
Carmen Lopez: [looks in compact mirror] Oh my God, Adam!
Max Lopez: You name your bruises too?
[shows one on his arm]
Max Lopez: This is Steve!

Angie Lopez: There's something I want to talk to you about, but first let me make us a cup of tea.
Carmen Lopez: [groans] No! The last time we had tea it was to talk about my special visitor, oh and you forgot to mention she comes with a couple friends: crampy and bloaty!

George Lopez: [Adam's at the door] Angie, does that moron have a hickey?
Angie Lopez: Yep.
Carmen Lopez: Run, Adam!
[Adam freezes]
Angie Lopez: You better *run*, moron!

George Lopez: Tell her about being 16 and pregnant, tell her about how I ruined your life.
Benny: Oh you didn't ruin my life.
George Lopez: This is no time for jokes!
Benny: [to Carmen] Your father didn't ruin my life, *I* ruined my life. Look, when you're young you meet a guy who seems great, and you forget about what's right or wrong and go to bed with him, and it's pretty good!
George Lopez: MOM!
Benny: I'm not going to lie! But then, he doesn't turn out to be as great as you thought and the next thing you know, you're alone with a baby. And while the rest of your friends are out having a great time, you're up to your stretch marks in dirty diapers. I gave up all my pretty years for him
[points to George]
George Lopez: Are you ready for that to be you?
Carmen Lopez: I'm not going to have sex, I know I'm not ready yet.

"George Lopez: What George Doesn't Noah... (#3.27)" (2004)
Zack Powers: [to Carmen] How come you never wear this tube top for me?
Carmen Lopez: That's a headband.
Zack Powers: All right, put this thong on.
Carmen Lopez: That's a shoelace.

Carmen Lopez: [to Max] Buttmunch!
Max Lopez: [to Carmen] Buttweed!
Carmen Lopez: [to Max] Buttface!
Angie Lopez: [to Carmen and Max] Okay, stop it. You are both buttmunching, buttweeding, buttfaces!

George Lopez: [to Carmen] Your boyfriend's in the closet.
Carmen Lopez: Oh, my God!
[the closet door slowly opens and Zack starts to walk out; George doesn't notice]
George Lopez: I know, I don't like it either, but just because Noah's gay...
[Zack gets back into the closet slowly]
George Lopez: ... it has nothing to do with you.

"George Lopez: Home Sweet Homeschool (#4.4)" (2004)
Carmen Lopez: Home school! Mom could teach me!
George Lopez: Why should she be punished?

Carmen Lopez: [to Angie] So, now you're accusing me of cheating? This is hell! I can't take it anymore! There's no breaks, no one to talk to, it's just you all day! Have you ever spent 8 hours with yourself? No wonder Dad always hides in the garage.
George Lopez: I'm not hiding. I'm working.
Carmen Lopez: It doesn't take 3 years to build a birdhouse.
George Lopez: It does if you're doing it southern plantation style.

Janet: Your daughter appeared in a Chingy video having a pillow fight on a waterbed.
Carmen Lopez: [excited] I didn't get cut out!
Carmen Lopez: I can't go back to public school, they called me a *whore*.
Janet: Beeeeefore you did the video?

"George Lopez: Happy Birthdays (#1.3)" (2002)
Angie Lopez: Happy Wednesday.
Carmen Lopez: Oh come on, Mom, you know that's not what he wants. Crappy birthday, Dad.

Angie Lopez: I'm giving your father the birthday party he never had as a kid.
Carmen Lopez: Why can't you just put on Moulin Rouge and dance around for him?
Angie Lopez: How did you know about that?
Carmen Lopez: Oh, don't worry, you're a great role model for me... my friends thought so too.
Angie Lopez: That's it, no more sleepovers.

Carmen Lopez: [busts into the bedroom while George and Angie are talking calmly] Mommy, Daddy, please stop fighting! You're going to drive me into the arms of a sympathetic gang member!
Angie Lopez: [looks at her] Did your father put you up to this?
Carmen Lopez: No... it's just hard to concentrate... and all this...
George Lopez: [to Carmen] Okay, two things: You came in a little early... and I didn't believe you on the second one.

"George Lopez: Prototype (#1.1)" (2002)
Angie Lopez: How many weeks have you had this period?
Carmen Lopez: I don't know... six?
George Lopez: Six weeks, if you went to a Catholic school, you'd be a miracle.

Carmen Lopez: Max wants to know if he can sleep with the light on, he dreamed that Grandma was trying to kill him.
Angie Lopez: [to George] You want to bring THAT into our home?
George Lopez: Angie, it's a boy dreaming about spending time with his grandmother, does it really matter what they're doing?

Carmen Lopez: Max had a nightmare about Grandma again.
Max Lopez: [gets in bed with George and Angie] This time she was chasing me with a knife.
[Benny enters the bedroom with knife]
Max Lopez: AHHHH!
George Lopez: [turns] AHHHH!
Carmen Lopez: [turns] AHHHH!
Angie Lopez: [turns] AHHHH!
Benny: [unfazed] Who wants cake?

"George Lopez: George Gets Caught in a Powers Play (#5.16)" (2006)
Angie Lopez: [calls for Veronica] Get down her now, you ungrateful tramp!
Carmen Lopez: [comes downstairs thinking her parents called her] What?
George Lopez: We know what you did, we want to hear from your mouth.

Angie Lopez: [about Veronica] That's it, that was the last straw. I can't take it anymore. I want her out of this house.
Carmen Lopez: [comes downstairs again, thinking Angie's talking about her] God, it was just a scratch. I'll pay for it. What do you want from me?

"George Lopez: Why You Crying? (#3.13)" (2004)
Carmen Lopez: So Max fails and he gets to do anything he wants? If I fail geometry can I get my navel pierced?
George Lopez: If you flunk geometry I'll pierce it for you.
Carmen Lopez: [mocking him] Ta loca pierce it for you!

George Lopez: [to Max] A family is only as smart as its dumbest kid, so let's make that Carmen again.
Carmen Lopez: Hey!
George Lopez: Quiet, I'm teaching.

"George Lopez: George's Dog Days of Bummer (#5.3)" (2005)
George Lopez: [finding Benny unresponsive on the couch] Mom?
Carmen Lopez: Okay, I just took CPR in P.E. We're supposed to pull her tongue out and scoop any vomit out of her airway.
George Lopez: [looks at Angie] We did all that we could, I'm calling it, time of death, 10 after 3.
[pulls blanket over Benny]

Angie Lopez: [the kids put on a play of Benny's life] How much more is there?
Carmen Lopez: There's the daughter she gave away, and the time she got gonorrhea.
George Lopez: [stands up] Okay! Show's over!

"George Lopez: Profiles in Courage (#2.18)" (2003)
Carmen Lopez: How come Max is allowed to have a girl in his bedroom, but I'm not allowed to have a boy in my room?
Angie Lopez: Please! He still thinks "making out" is looking for change in the couch.

George Lopez: [about firing Hosni for being Araba and a professional flier] You don't understand how many times I've been discriminated. When I go to the mall, the cops follow me. When I'm mowing the lawn, some of the neighbors ask how much I pay. Once, when I was playing golf, a man actually drove up and gave me his keys to his car!
Carmen Lopez: What did you do?
George Lopez: I took it!

"George Lopez: Prescription for Trouble (#4.11)" (2005)
Carmen Lopez: I know why the caged bird sings!
[walks away]
George Lopez: [to Carmen] Well, you're crazy if you think we're getting you a sweater and a bird!

Max Lopez: My stomach hurts.
Angie Lopez: What did you eat?
Max Lopez: Some mints that were in Carmen's room.
George Lopez: Carmen!
Carmen Lopez: What's going on?
George Lopez: Max took some of your mints and they made him sick.
Carmen Lopez: What mints?
Max Lopez: The ones in the little tin in your coat pocket under the bed.
Carmen Lopez: Oh! Those mints. They were probably just stale. How many did you take?
Max Lopez: 5, Monday through Friday.
George Lopez: What do you mean Monday through Friday?
Max Lopez: They were all on a wheel. She had about a month's worth.

"George Lopez: Now George Noah Ex-Zack-Ly What Happened (#3.28)" (2004)
George Lopez: [to Carmen about Zack] He told me he was going to dump you as soon as he got you into bed.
Carmen Lopez: You're lying! You hate him so much, you'd make up anything.
George Lopez: Oh, yeah? Did I also make up that he trashed the factory? Or that he got a sixteen-year-old girl pregnant?
Angie Lopez: He didn't even care enough about that girl to use protection?

Carmen Lopez: [to her parents about Zack] You guys don't understand Zack! His dad was never there for him and his mom's a bitter old drunk. You have no idea what that's like.
[Benny hides her beer]
George Lopez: [to Benny] Do you want to field that one?

"George Lopez: Curious George (#1.2)" (2002)
Carmen Lopez: [with red highlights] How does my hair look?
George Lopez: Like you fell asleep in ketchup.

Carmen Lopez: [sitting in the yard wearing shower caps] We're dyeing our hair, Dad.
Benny: Yeah, so move out of the way, I need the sun to cook the juices and your big head is making an eclipse.

"George Lopez: Dubya, Dad and Dating: Part 1 (#3.1)" (2003)
Carmen Lopez: How can you sleep at night knowing you help bomb babies?
George Lopez: We don't make the bombs, Carmen, we make the landing gear so the plane can come back and reload.
Carmen Lopez: Read the shirt, Dad.
George Lopez: [reads Carmen's T-shirt, dryly] 'Smart bombs are dumb'. Wow, I never knew a rhinestone T-shirt could be so powerful.

Carmen Lopez: This country has freedom of speech, people fought and died for that right.
George Lopez: I thought you said was wrong.

"George Lopez: She Drives Me Crazy (#3.23)" (2004)
George Lopez: [shows Carmen a calendar] What's the date circled?
Carmen Lopez: My 18th birthday...
George Lopez: I circled that, because that's going to be the worst day of my life.
Carmen Lopez: Oh... why's there a little potato next to it?
George Lopez: Actually that's a boot, I was angry at you one day and I was going to kick you out.

"George Lopez: This Old Casa (#2.12)" (2003)
Angie Lopez: [George is playing a violent video game on the computer] George?
[he doesn't respond, to Carmen]
Angie Lopez: What's he playing?
Carmen Lopez: S.W.A.T Team, but he's killing all the civilians.

"George Lopez: Sabes Quake (#4.15)" (2005)
Carmen Lopez: Dad! The Changs left another hot apple pie cooling on the windowsill.
George Lopez: Make it look like dogs got it again. Go!

"George Lopez: Girls Night Out (#2.20)" (2003)
Carmen Lopez: [watching Marisol put on makeup] Your eye ends here but your eyeshadow goes way back here.
Marisol: At least I got a reason to put on makeup, all you've done for three days is sit up here and read... stupid reader.

"George Lopez: Weekend at Benny's (#3.17)" (2004)
George Lopez: You're going to live here like I did as a kid, so no cell phones.
Carmen Lopez: Hey!
George Lopez: No computer games.
Max Lopez: Hey!
George Lopez: And if you cry yourself to sleep, save the tears so you have something to drink in the morning.

"George Lopez: George Drives the Batmobile (#5.4)" (2005)
Carmen Lopez: [chatting up a guy at Thirsty's] Cool, you have your own card. What exactly does a stockbroker do?
George Lopez: [comes up on them] He goes to prison for picking up 17 year old girls in bars.
[man leaves]

"George Lopez: The Wedding Dance (#2.7)" (2002)
Carmen Lopez: [watching Angie's drunk dancing] Oh my God, Mom is going to be SO embarrassed.
Benny: Not if you don't get the video camera!
[Carmen looks at her and grins]
Benny: Hurry!

"George Lopez: George Gets a Pain in the Ash (#5.1)" (2005)
Carmen Lopez: [to Jason] Let's do it tomorrow night. It'll be so romantic. I'll rent a hotel room for us, buy a sexy new outfit, and I'll bring Mr. Snugglebear?
Jason: You're going to bring your Mr. Snugglebear?
Carmen Lopez: Yeah! Does it bother you that he's a boy bear?

"George Lopez: Max's Big Adventure (#1.4)" (2002)
Carmen Lopez: How was Max's play?
Benny: [holding cigarettes] About a pack and a half too long.

"George Lopez: George Gets Assisterance (#4.14)" (2005)
George Lopez: [Carmen sneaks down to the kitchen in the dark for a snack] We're out of ice cream.
[turns on the light and reveals he's eaten a dozen ice cream cups]
Carmen Lopez: [worried] Do I need to go get Mom?
George Lopez: Carmen, how would you feel if you found out you were adopted and I wasn't really your dad?
Carmen Lopez: Dad, don't ever say that... unless you're sure it's true! God, that would explain SO much!
George Lopez: You're mine! If you were adopted, I would've returned you, California has lemon laws.

"George Lopez: Meet the Cuban Parents (#2.11)" (2002)
Benny: I liked that theatre, I can't wait to see what they do with The Nutcracker.
Carmen Lopez: I can't believe they shot Santa Claus for wearing the wrong colors!

"George Lopez: George to the Third Power (#4.13)" (2005)
George Lopez: Don't make fun of your brother's braces, you're just jealous we can fix his teeth but we can't fix your legs.
Carmen Lopez: What's wrong with my legs?
George Lopez: Nothing if they came with biscuits and cole slaw, buck buck!

"George Lopez: Who's Your Daddy? (#2.1)" (2002)
George Lopez: What's that smell?
Max Lopez: That's our new dog.
George Lopez: Ooh, he doesn't smell new. Put him on his leash and take him for a walk.
Carmen Lopez: He can't walk.
George Lopez: Then pick him up and squeeze him till he pees.

"George Lopez: Token of Unappreciation (#2.2)" (2002)
Carmen Lopez: [asked why she'd go to a party with girls who insulted Toby] But she won't be there!
George Lopez: See, that's because you're using teenage logic, it's THAT thinking that gets your kind killed first in the horror movies.

"George Lopez: It's a Cliffhanger, by George (#5.22)" (2006)
Carmen Lopez: I just got my letter from Northern Vermont, but I'm afraid to open it. This is my last shot, Mom. Not just for an education, for freedom. I can't party and pierce things in this house. I need to go away.

"George Lopez: Sk8erboyz (#4.6)" (2004)
Carmen Lopez: [to Angie about Max] You still dress him like he's in elementary school. Dorky shirt, dorky pants,
[pulls up the back of Max's shirt]
Carmen Lopez: You can't even see his boxers. Why don't you just dress him in a Tickle Me Elmo shirt and send him to his death?

"George Lopez: Split Decision (#3.6)" (2003)
Carmen Lopez: I'll just need the ski equipment, it shouldn't cost more than... five hundred dollars.
George Lopez: Five hundred dollars? Ta loca, five hundred dollars!
Carmen Lopez: Well, what if you don't buy me anything for Christmas?
George Lopez: You're still four hundred and eighty dollars short.

"George Lopez: Wrecking Ball (#3.26)" (2004)
Carmen Lopez: [when she finds out who vandalized the factory] Zack Powers did this?
George Lopez: Hey, I told you he was a criminal! God help the skank that falls in love with him.
[Carmen makes a face]