Michelle Rueben
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Quotes for
Michelle Rueben (Character)
from How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)

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How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)
Michelle Rubin: Why this place?
Jeannie Ashcroft: It's perfect. Hi, Ingrid.
Mullen's Hostess: Hi.
Jeannie Ashcroft: Mullen's is the apres-work watering hole for the upwardly mobile.

Andie: Why do they always forget my bacon?
Jeannie Ashcroft: I can't believe you got that guy knocked out.
Andie: Only for a few seconds.
Lana Jong: Andie, I am loving your notes on this piece.
Andie: [with her mouth full] Thank you, Lana.
Lana Jong: When are you seeing him again?
Andie: Tonight. He's inviting me over to his house for dinner.
Lana Jong: Excellent! I've got a feeling about this one.
Michelle Rubin: I hate it when she pops her head in like that.
Andie: I never noticed it.
Lana Jong: A-hem. I heard that. And Andie, tonight take smaller bites.
Andie: Thank you, Lana.
Michelle Rubin: Oh, my God!
Jeannie Ashcroft: Disgusting! I can barely eat over here.
[Andie takes an even bigger bite]

Ben: Look, look, look, wait a minute. The one night we even thought about having sex, all right, she up and decides she's going to nickname my...
Michelle Rubin: Penis?
Ben: Yeah. "Princess Sophia." You want to talk about shooting a man's horse? Whop! Come on!

Michelle Rubin: So, tell me, how long have you guys been seeing each other?
Andie: Seven days.
Michelle Rubin: Seven days. Interesting.
Ben: Is that too soon to be seeing a therapist?
Andie: Well, Ben, seven days isn't like a lifetime, or anything...
Ben: It's like a week.

Ben: Excuse me, ma'am.
Jeannie Ashcroft: Holy crap!
Ben: Where's Andie Anderson?
Jeannie Ashcroft: Uh, she's not here.
Ben: Where is she?
Michelle Rubin: She quit.
Jeannie Ashcroft: She's got an interview in Washington.
Ben: When is she leaving?
Jeannie Ashcroft: Today.
Ben: When?
Jeannie Ashcroft: Well, like, now.
Ben: You're not a therapist, are you?
Michelle Rubin: Oh, haha... no.
Ben: Good job, though. You owe me three hundred bucks.

Michelle Rubin: Oh, you are never going to pull this off.
Andie: Watch me. Tonight, I'll hook a guy. Tomorrow, pull the switch. Before the ten days are up, I'm going to have this guy running for his life.
Jeannie Ashcroft: You're not going to burn his apartment down or bite him, or anything?
Andie: No! I'm going to limit myself to doing everything girls do wrong in relationships. Basically, everything we know guys hate. I'll be clingy, needy...
Jeannie Ashcroft: Be touchy-feely.
Andie: Yeah.
Jeannie Ashcroft: Ooh, call him in the middle of the night and tell him everything you had to eat that day.
Michelle Rubin: What's wrong with that?
[Andie & Jeanie stare at Michelle]
Michelle Rubin: I'm kidding.