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: Ooh, ooh, Tig! Do you know how many, uh, lesbians it takes to screw in a light bulb? Tig
: Uh-uh, no.
] Sarah Silverman
: Oh. Brian
: She should know that. Sarah Silverman
: Yeah. Laura Silverman
: I think it's three.
Officer Jay McPherson
: Yeah, so my partner got supsended because this Hispanic kid pulls a gun on him, Paul opens fire. Turns out it's a pellet gun. It looked really real, though. Laura Silverman
: There should be a law that those things have to come in bright colors. Sarah Silverman
: Laura, they're human beings!
: I'm the victim of a hate crime. It's true. The lady at the country club wouldn't let me play tennis because I'm Jewish. Officer Jay McPherson
: What? Sarah Silverman
: She was like, "What's your name? Silverman?... Get out Jew". Laura Silverman
: She said that? Sarah Silverman
: Yeah. Basically. With her eyes.
: Wait, why wasn't I invited? Laura Silverman
: Well, Natalie said you had some kind of emergency. Sarah Silverman
: Yeah, I stubbed my vagina. Laura Silverman
: You can stub it? Sarah Silverman
: I can, I don't know about you.