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Quotes for
Hugh Hefner (Character)
from "The Playboy Club" (2011)

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Comic Book: The Movie (2004) (V)
Donald Swan: There's something about you that I think not a lot of people know, and that is that you wanted to be a cartoonist.
Hugh M. Hefner: That's true, yes.
Ricky: You went the right way though, man. You did.

Hugh M. Hefner: Because you grew up with this...
[gestures with Commander book]
Hugh M. Hefner: ...you have problems with this.
[gestures with Codename book]
Donald Swan: Well, if it were a separate thing, I don't care. But that it's based on this bothers me because I don't think these guys... this doesn't bother me.
Hugh M. Hefner: It doesn't? Schoolteacher and his nephew. That doesn't bother you at all?


"Family Guy: Airport '07 (#5.12)" (2007)
Quagmire: I don't deserve to be a pilot. I've let everybody down.
Hugh M. Hefner: Did you do the best you could?
Quagmire: Well, I was gonna, but I ended up getting laid instead.
Hugh M. Hefner: You know, that reminds me of what one young man once said: John Holmes, the greatest porn star who ever lived. He said, 'You know, I've got a 13-inch penis, and Glenn Quagmire is the best damn pilot I have ever seen.'
Quagmire: John Holmes said that?
Hugh M. Hefner: You bet he did, right before he died a very painful AIDS-related death from having unprotected sex with so many people.


Hop (2011)
Voice at Playboy Mansion: [Through an intercom] Listen, this is the Playboy Mansion, not a hotel.
E.B.: [Looking into a map] I know, but it says 'Since 1971 the Playboy Mansion has been home to many sexy bunnies.'
Voice at Playboy Mansion: I can't even see you. Step closer.
E.B.: [Stepping closer, face still in map] I'm just saying, I am a bunny and am incredibly sexy.
Voice at Playboy Mansion: I don't have time for this.
[Clicks intercom off]
E.B.: Hello? Hello? Ugh, this must the rags part of my rags-to-riches story.