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: [to Tracy
] This is America, babe, you gotta think big to be big. Edna Turnblad
: Big ain't the problem in this family, Wilbur.
: First the hair, now this? Wilbur Turnblad
: But, all the kids are battin' up their hair now, hon. Edna Turnblad
: [to Wilbur
] You're no help. Tracy Turnblad
: It's ratting, daddy.
] Tracy Turnblad
: And our first lady, Jacqueline Kennedy does it! Edna Turnblad
: I don't believe that. Tracy Turnblad
: What do you mean you don't believe that? How else would it look that way? Edna Turnblad
: I believe that it is naturally stiff.
: This heart only beats for size 60.
Velma Von Tussle
: Incredible! I could do a fan dance with a lettuce leaf and you would remain completely obtuse! Wilbur Turnblad
: Obtuse? Velma Von Tussle
: Yes, obtuse! Wilbur Turnblad
: I flunked geometry... Velma Von Tussle
: ...yes, and biology too, no doubt!
Amber von Tussel
: I lost, Mom. Let's just deal with it! Velma Von Tussle
: [as she pulls the tallies out of her dress
] You did not lose! You can not have lost because I switched the damn tallies! Edna Turnblad
: [standing behind a live television camera
] Smile, Miss Crabcakes! You're on Candid Camera! Wilbur Turnblad
: That was a good shot! Don't you think?
: [to Edna, as she resists the urge to jump onto the stage and dance
] Do it now! Or forever wish you had!
: [to a sobbing Edna, who thinks he's been cheating on her
] Honey, took me five years to figure out you were flirting!
] Wilbur Turnblad
: How could I ever?
: Tracy, we all have responsibilities in life. You may think owning the Hardy-Har joke shop is all drudgery; unwrapping dribble glasses, checking doggy doo, but I wuv it.
Amber Von Tussle
: That girl's got roaches in her hair! Edna Turnblad
: Roaches? Our little Tracy's a clean teen! Wilbur
: There's no bugs on our baby! Amber Von Tussle
: I'm not kidding, I just saw one!