Shirley Partridge
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Quotes for
Shirley Partridge (Character)
from "The Partridge Family" (1970)

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"The Partridge Family: What? and Get Out of Show Business? (#1.1)" (1970)
Danny: I'm worried about you Mom. You're too old to be working.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [smiles] Thank you Danny. You just made my day.

Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I keep seeing the headline in "Variety" - "Partridges Lay an Egg."

Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [Catches Tracy, with a drumstick in her nostril] Tracy! Don't put that drumstick up your nose.
Tracy Partridge: Why not?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: You don't know where it's been.

Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [the Family is backstage, about to make their debut in Las Vegas. Shirley is having stage fright]
[Through clenched teeth]
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I'm having trouble moving my mouth.
Danny: Don't worry about it, it's perfectly normal.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: How can I sing if I can't move my mouth?
Keith: Just fake it, ok?
[Shirley suddenly bends over and clutches her knees]
Keith: Why are you feeling your knees?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I think they're locked.
Danny: Good. That'll stop you from falling if you pass out.
Laurie Partridge: Don't worry Mom, we'll all be here to help you.
Christopher "Chris" Partridge #1: Sure, you don't have to worry about a thing!
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Aren't you kids nervous at all?
Laurie Partridge: No.
Danny: Why should we be nervous? We're terrific!
Club Manager: All right, places everyone. We're ready to go!
Keith: [as they quickly take their places] You're gonna be wonderful, honest, Mom.
Laurie Partridge: This is the big time. You'll be great, you'll be fantastic, nothing to worry about.
Danny: Relax, Mom, but just remember our whole future depends on these next few minutes.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [groans] Ohhhhhhhhh...

Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [the Family is backstage, about to make their debut in Las Vegas. Shirley is having stage fright. Through clenched teeth:] I'm having trouble moving my mouth.
Danny: Don't worry about it, it's perfectly normal.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: How can I sing if I can't move my mouth?
Keith: Just fake it, ok?
Keith: [Shirley suddenly bends over and clutches her knees] Why are you feeling your knees?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I think they're locked.
Danny: Good. That'll stop you from falling if you pass out.
Laurie Partridge: Don't worry Mom, we'll all be here to help you.
Christopher "Chris" Partridge #1: Sure, you don't have to worry about a thing!
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Aren't you kids nervous at all?
Laurie Partridge: No.
Danny: Why should we be nervous? We're terrific!
Club Manager: All right, places everyone. We're ready to go!
Keith: [as they quickly take their places] You're gonna be wonderful, honest, Mom.
Laurie Partridge: This is the big time. You'll be great, you'll be fantastic, nothing to worry about.
Danny: Relax, Mom, but just remember our whole future depends on these next few minutes.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [groans] Ohhhhhhhhh...


"The Partridge Family: The Sound of Money (#1.2)" (1970)
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: [Welcoming Reuben and Danny home] I see my spies came in out of the cold!

Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I've decided to join you kids. We're going to fight Whiplash Willie.
Danny Partridge: Yeah! We're gonna fight! We're gonna win!
Reuben Kincaid: Strange. That's exactly what General Custer said.


"The Partridge Family: The Undergraduate (#2.4)" (1971)
Danny: I wonder if your going to college is such a good idea.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I don't think a little psychology course is going to take up that much time.
Danny: Well, campuses are a hotbed of radicals. I'm afraid you're going to get mixed up in some kind of protest march.
Laurie Partridge: I thought you had to be over 30 to be that establishment.
Keith: Maybe it's inches instead of years.


"The Partridge Family: Danny Converts (#4.17)" (1974)
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: People aren't as different as we think. We may have different beliefs, but we're all pretty much alike.


"The Partridge Family: Who Is Max Ledbetter and Why Is He Saying All Those Terrible Things? (#2.24)" (1972)
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: ...Danny wanted an advance on his allowance.
Reuben Kincaid: What's so strange about that?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: A six-year advance?


"The Partridge Family: Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex... But Couldn't Pronounce (#3.20)" (1973)
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Reuben, they didn't teach sex education when you went to high school."
Reuben Kincaid: Yeah, I know. But I flunked it anyway.


Come On, Get Happy: The Partridge Family Story (1999) (TV)
Tracy: If we get rid of Danny, can I pretend to play the guitar?
Danny Bonaduce: My, God! Three years on the show, and it's the first time I've ever heard her speak!
Shirley Jones: That's it, Danny! Go to your room!


"The Partridge Family: I Can Get It for You Retail (#2.11)" (1971)
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Hi Reuben. Somebody stole Keith's hair.
Laurie Partridge: You don't have any questions?
Reuben Kincaid: I have a number of questions, I'm deciding which one to ask first.


"The Partridge Family: Swiss Family Partridge (#3.9)" (1972)
Laurie Partridge: Well, Chris and Tracy have to eat, so I'll volunteer some of my food.
Keith Douglas Partridge: Yeah, I will too.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: I will too.
Danny Partridge: I was going to give them some of my biscuit, but I don't have it anymore.
Reuben Kincaid: [about to take a bite of the biscuit that he took from Danny] Well, how important are they to the act?


"The Partridge Family: Not with My Sister, You Don't! (#1.23)" (1971)
Danny: How could you let Laurie go out with him, Mom? It's written all over his face.
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: What's written all over his face?
Danny: Giggle-o!
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Giggle-o! If that's what's written all over his face, he's very poor in spelling.
Danny: However it's pronounced, it means rotten.


"The Partridge Family: Promise Her Anything, But Give Her a Punch (#2.21)" (1972)
Keith: Hi. Why does everybody look so glum?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Keith. I'm afraid you have a big problem.
Keith: Oh, I do?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: Mm hmm. Little Gloria Hickey's in love with you.
Keith: Is this a put-on?
Laurie Partridge: Oh, afraid not, brother.
Laurie Partridge: She's gonna ask you to the sixth grade dance.
Keith: Poor Danny, does he know?
Shirley Renfrew Partridge: No, and I don't want him to know. It would break his heart.
Keith: What am I gonna do, I...
Danny: Laurie, Mom, Mr. Kincaid. To Keith: HOME WRECKER!
[He kicks him in the shin and runs]
Keith: Ow! I think he knows!