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] I'd cook like Betty Crocker and I'd look like Donna Reed!
: Seymour's first radio broadcast! I wanted to hear it so bad. I tried to be on time, but... Mr. Mushnik
: Don't tell me. You got tied up. Audrey
: No. Just handcuffed a little.
: [of Orin's disappearance
] It wouldn't be terrible at all. It would be a miracle, not to mention the money I'd save on epsom salts and ace bandages.
: All I ever wanted was you and a sweet little house. Seymour
: Oh Audrey, you're the most wondeful person that ever lived. We're gonna get that little house and everything's gonna be alright, you'll see.
: [singing about her dream home with Seymour
] Between our frozen dinners, and our bedtime - 9:15 - we'd snuggle watching Lucy on a big, enormous, 12-inch screen!
: I'm sorry doctor, I'm sorry. Orin
: Fall off the motorcycle my ass!
] A matchbox of our own, a fence of real chain-link/A grill out on the patio, disposal in the sink/A washer and a dryer and an ironing machine/In a tract house that we share/Somewhere that's green
: Stupid woman! Christ, what a friggin' scatterbrain! Audrey
: I'm sorry, doctor! I'm sorry, doctor! Orin
: Falls off the motorcycle! Audrey
: I'm clumsy, doctor! I'm clumsy, doctor! Orin
: [kicks down the doors
] Messes my hair! Get the door open, you little slut! Audrey
: I'm trying, doctor! I;m trying, doctor! Orin
: Get the Vitalis! Quick, the Vitalis! Audrey
: [feeling threatened
] I'M OUT OF IT! Orin
: [grabs her
[Orin slaps her harshly making her cry
] Suddenly Seymour / Is standing beside you Audrey
] Suddenly Seymour / Showed me I can... Audrey
: [singing over sustain
] Yes you can... Patrick Martin
: Excuse me! Pardon me, beg your pardon, if you two kids would stop singing for just a moment I've got something I want to discuss with you.
: Me and the guys at the home office have been following this plant of yours. We've come up with one incredible idea. We're very proud of it. Picture this: we take leaf cuttings, develop little Audrey IIs and sell them to florist shops across the nation. Pretty soon every household in America could have one. Seymour
] Every household in America! Patrick Martin
: For starters, kid. Why, this thing could go... worldwide! Seymour
: [to each other, panicked:
] *Worldwide*? Patrick Martin
: With the right advertising, this thing could be bigger than Hula-Hoops. Audrey
: [to Seymour, intrigued:
] Bigger than Hula-Hoops?
: I don't believe it. Audrey II
: Believe it, baby. It talks. Audrey
: Am I dreaming this? Audrey II
: No, and you ain't in Kansas, neither.
: I need me some water in the worst way. Look at my branches. I'm dryin' up. I'm a *goner*, honey! Audrey II
] Come on and give me a drink! Audrey
: I don't know if I should. Audrey II
] Hey, little lady, be nice. Audrey
: Do you talk to Seymour like this? Audrey II
] Sure do. I'll take it straight. Audrey
: Your leaves *are* dry. Audrey II
] Don't need no glass or no ice. Audrey
: I'll get the can. Audrey II
] Don't need no twist of lime... Audrey
] Here we go! Audrey II
: And now it's *suppertime*!
: I got a date. Mr. Mushnik
: With that same no-goodnik? I'm telling you, Audrey, you don't need a date - you need major medical!
: You okay? Audrey
: Yes... no...
[Audrey falls to the ground. Seymour helps her up and holds her in his arms
: Don't die, Audrey! Please don't die! Audrey
: You know, the plant just said the strangest thing just now. It said Orin and Mr. Mushnik are already inside! Seymour
: It's true. I did it. I fed them to it. Audrey
: And that's what made it so big and strong, and you so famous? Seymour
: I've done terrible things, Audrey, but not to you. Never to you. Audrey
: But... I want you to, Seymour. Seymour
: What? Audrey
: When I die, which should be very shortly, give me to the plant, so that it will live and bring you all the wonderful things you deserve. Seymour
: You don't know what you're saying. Audrey
: But I do! It's the one gift I can give you. And if I'm in the plant, then I am part of the plant, so in a way... we'll always be together.
] You'll wash my tender leaves/You'll smell my sweet perfume/You'll water me, and care for me/You'll see me bud and bloom/I'm feeling strangely happy now/Contented and serene/Oh, don't you see?/Finally, I'll be/Somewhere that's... green!
] Downtown/Where the guys are drips. Company
: Downtown! Audrey
: Where they rip your slips. Company
: Downtown! Audrey
: Where relationships are no go/Down on Skid Row.
] Gee, it sure would be swell to get outta here/Bid the gutter farewell and get outta here/I'd move Heaven and Hell to get outta Skid/I'd do I don't know what to get outta Skid... Company
: Downtown! Seymour
: But a hell of a lot to get outta Skid... Company
: Downtown! Seymour
: People tell me there's not a way outta Skid... Company
: Downtown! Seymour
: But believe me/I gotta get outta Skid... Seymour
: [after saving Audrey from Audrey II
] Are you okay? Audrey
: Yes... No...
: Audrey! Audrey! Audrey
: [gets back up
] No, really, I'm okay. Seymour
: I'm sorry, Audrey, I'm just so sorry. I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to hurt anyone. It's just that somehow it makes things happen - terrible things. Well, I guess I should've stopped when I found out what it lived on, but it was cute and harmless, and we started doing business and making money and you like me... Audrey
: Seymour! Do you really think I liked you because of that?
[Seymour goes silent
: I liked you from the day I came to work here. Seymour
: You mean you still like me, even if I wasn't famous? Audrey
] I'd still love you Seymour. Seymour
: Really? Audrey
: Yes. All I ever wanted was you... and that sweet little house. Seymour
] Oh, Audrey, you're the most wonderful person that ever lived! We're gonna get that little house and everything will be okay somehow, you'll see!
: Suddenly Seymour is standing beside you. Audrey
] Suddenly Seymour showed me I can! Audrey
: Yes, you can!
: [excited about the overnight growth of Audrey Jr
] Isn't it empirical? Gravis Mushnik
: It grows like a cold sore from the lip.
: Don't waste your pity on me, Audrey. I'm not worth it. Audry Fulquard
: Who says you're not? Seymour Krelboin
: Everybody. Audry Fulquard
: Yeah, I know.
: Don't worry, you're gonna be another Luther Glendale. Seymour Krelboin
: Pasadena. Audry Fulquard
: Why don't you give him a chance to resurrect himself? Gravis Mushnik
: I give him chance to quit! Seymour Krelboin
: I ain't gonna quit! Gravis Mushnik
: You're a brave boy, you're fired.
: I wish you'd break out and tell me. Gravis Mushnik
: All right, I'll tell you tomorrow right after I am telling the police. Sgt. Joe Fink
] But Mushnik didn't come to the police. If he had, that might have been the finish of the unhappy story. It was not.
: Now that is what I call a salad. What do you call that salad? Audry Fulquard