Charlie Crews
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Quotes for
Charlie Crews (Character)
from "Life" (2007/I)

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"Life: Pilot: Merit Badge (#1.1)" (2007/I)
Corrections Officer #1: Getting' angry, convict?
Charlie Crews: Anger ruins joy, steals the goodness of my mind, forces my mouth to say terrible things. Overcoming anger brings peace of mind, leads to a mind without regrets. If I overcome anger, I will be delightful and loved by everyone.
Correctional officer #2: Are you makin' fun of us?
Charlie Crews: It is the universe that makes fun of us all.

Dani Reese: Why exactly would the universe make fun of us all?
Charlie Crews: Maybe it's insecure.

Dani Reese: No threats against his family?
Correctional officer #2: Not that we know, but we just work here. We go home after our shifts. It's the convicts who are here 24/7, they know what really goes on.
Charlie Crews: He means inmates.
Corrections Officer #1: He means convicts.
Correctional officer #2: What, you don't like that word? What do you care?
[Charlie turns to face the guard]
Dani Reese: Come on Crews, let's go.
Correctional officer #2: Yeah, we know who you are. Know you did your 12 years. Maybe you were innocent. Maybe not. It don't make no difference to us, because we know what you did to that correction officer in Pelican Bay. That makes you a con. Don't it?
Dani Reese: You two need to escort us out know.
Corrections Officer #1: You gettin' angry, convict?
Charlie Crews: [calmly] Anger ruins joy. Steals the goodness of my mind. Forces my mouth to say terrible things. Overcoming anger brings peace of mind. Leads to a mind without regrets. If I overcome anger, I will be delightful and loved by everyone.
Correctional officer #2: Are you making fun of us?
Charlie Crews: It is the universe that makes fun of us all.
[turns and faces other guard, walks away. Reese gives them both a look]

Charlie Crews: [to Reese] The dog must have took a bullet for the kid. Then took the shooter's finger off. Anyone ever love you that much?

Charlie Crews: Oh, okay, okay you're mad at me.
Dani Reese: Mad, no I'm not mad. I mean I don't even think there is a word for what I am. I mean what you did to that husband, I kinda get, okay. I mean I guess I kinda get, but what you said to that wife...
Charlie Crews: I know. That one was me. It was my fault, I take responsibility. I wasn't in the moment. If I'd stayed in the moment, if I'd stayed present, I would of been okay, but I didn't. I was thinking about where we're going next. So I left the moment just when I should have been completely in the moment, which is when people usually leave the moment, but the moment is just too much for, which is pretty much always too much. I was thinking about where we're gonna go next.

[driving his Bentley, spots a silver Mercedes, puts the cherry/light on his roof, pulls the car over, and approaches the driver]
Man: So what is it this time?
Charlie Crews: License and registration.
Man: You know damn well who I am.
Charlie Crews: License and registration please.
Man: Look, I married your ex-wife, that is not a crime.
[Hands Charlie his license and registration]
Charlie Crews: Are you aware that you changed lanes back there without signaling?
[takes out book, begins writing a ticket]
Man: You have nothing better to do?
Charlie Crews: No sir. Not at this moment.

[Reese is questioning a child-victim's friend, Tyler]
Charlie Crews: Reese, I guess what I wanna say is, you've probably had to fight, being a woman in this department, right?
[stands up]
Charlie Crews: Fight for everything you ever got?
[Tyler is observing them]
Dani Reese: Detective Crews, this is not the place for that discussion. Detective Crews.
[Stands up]
Charlie Crews: I just wanted to say...
Dani Reese: Crews. Step...
Charlie Crews: I wanted to let you know...
Dani Reese: Step back.
Charlie Crews: You don't have to fight with me.
Dani Reese: Step back.
Charlie Crews: [to Tyler] She thinks I'm gonna hug. You think I'm gonna hug you.
[Hugs Reese, looking at Tyler, who laughs]
Charlie Crews: As I hug my partner, I know she is real, and mindfully meet this person with open arms and an open heart.
[Reese pushes him off of her]
Charlie Crews: I'm not gonna fight with you.

Tyler Hawley: He sent John an IM. I don't know who he really is.
Charlie Crews: An IM? He sent John an IM.
[to Reese]
Charlie Crews: He sent John an IM.
[after questioning Tyler]
Charlie Crews: Reese, what exactly is an IM?
[she give him a look, gets up and leaves]
Charlie Crews: [later]
Charlie Crews: What is it, an email?

Charlie Crews: Dani Reese, Bobby Stark.
Bobby Stark: No, you're Charlie's new partner?
[looks her up and down]
Bobby Stark: We got something in common.
Dani Reese: Oh yeah, what would that be?

Bobby Stark: Hey, can I get a picture, you know, on account of you being a celebrity detective and all.
[takes his cell phone out, hands it to his partner, Juarez]
Charlie Crews: That's a phone Bobby.
Tito Juarez: It's got a camera in it, where you been?
Charlie Crews: Me? I've been in federal maximum security prison.

Charlie Crews: Hey, Ted, the orange grove deal includes the tractor, right? The big red one?
Ted Early: Yeah Charlie, it includes the big red tractor.

Charlie Crews: [reading book titled "Internet for Idiots"] IM stands for "instant-message".
Dani Reese: I know that.
Charlie Crews: You can't trace an IM.
Dani Reese: Detective, I know that too.

Dani Reese: [answers her phone] Yeah? Uh, it's for you.
[hands Charlie the phone]
Charlie Crews: Hello?
Constance Griffiths: Charlie.
Charlie Crews: You're aware this isn't my phone?
Constance Griffiths: When you answer your phone, I'll call you on your phone. I need to see you.
Charlie Crews: I'm fightin' crime.
[Reese looks at him]
Constance Griffiths: Come over tonight. I'll buy fruit.
[hangs up]
Dani Reese: I don't exactly understand you.
Charlie Crews: You don't have to understand here to be here.
Dani Reese: That's what I don't understand.

[at Constance's house, eating pieces of cantaloupe off a knife]
Constance Griffiths: Your father's been calling me. Twice today. Three times yesterday.
Charlie Crews: You want some melon? It's very fresh and juicy.
Constance Griffiths: Are you not talking about this?
Charlie Crews: I'd ask you to address all your questions to my lawyer.
Constance Griffiths: I am your lawyer. Your father is getting married.
Charlie Crews: No, he's getting RE-married.
Constance Griffiths: He wants you to come.
Charlie Crews: His bride-to-be is 8 years old. Anyway, I don't have a date.
Constance Griffiths: From what I hear, you have plenty of dates. Charlie, please call your father. If only so he will stop calling me.
Charlie Crews: My father is getting remarried to an 8 year old. Because my mother is dead. My mother is dead because he killed her. He killed her when he wouldn't let her come see me.
Constance Griffiths: No Zen for Daddy?
Charlie Crews: No Zen for Daddy.

[Charlie driving his Bentley. Car Automated Voice: Call from Dani Reese. beep-sound]
Charlie Crews: Hello?
Dani Reese: Hello. Crews you there?
Charlie Crews: Reese? Am I talking to you?
Dani Reese: What do you mean are you talking to me, you're talking to me.
Charlie Crews: [looking around his car] But how am I talking to you?
Dani Reese: Crews, we got a hit off that finger you dug up. A junkie named Lonny Garth. He's got no known address, but he hangs out at those crack houses downtown. I'm sending you his mugshot right now.
[sends it over her computer]
Charlie Crews: To my house?
Dani Reese: To your phone.
Charlie Crews: [his phone beeps, he opens it, screen displays the mugshot]
Charlie Crews: That's like...
Dani Reese: Living in the future?
Charlie Crews: Actually, I thought about that, and it turns out there really is no future, or past either, just now. And now.
[she hangs up]
Charlie Crews: And now, now, Reese?

Dani Reese: Why'd you become a cop again?
Charlie Crews: When I was doing all that time, I always thought inside me, I'm still a cop, it's what I held onto.
Dani Reese: Wow, that sounds like a lot of crap.
Charlie Crews: A lot of life is a lot of crap.

Dani Reese: I need a drink.
Charlie Crews: I know somethin' better.
[on the street, Charlie is eating a cup of fruit]
Charlie Crews: Mango?
Dani Reese: [shakes her head] It's okay.
Charlie Crews: This came all the way from Guatemala. And now it's right here in this cup. It's all connected Reese.
Dani Reese: What is?
Charlie Crews: It is.
Dani Reese: Mmm, that's Zen.
Charlie Crews: Is it?
Dani Reese: That's Zen too, isn't it?
Charlie Crews: Is it?
Dani Reese: Say "is it?" one more time and I'll shoot you.

Alice Gibney: My husband told me about you. A cop, in jail, all those years. How did you go on living? How did you get past it?
Charlie Crews: Well, I could tell you you're already past it, tell you this moment is your life. I could tell you you have a husband and child who need you. But none of that means anything, does it?
Alice Gibney: So tell me something that means something. Tell me anything that means something.
Charlie Crews: The man who killed your son is out there, right now, inside this same moment we are in. As we sit here, as I look at you, the man who killed John is free. Now that means something, doesn't it?

[last lines]
Ted Early: [first time driving tractor] Whoa! Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa! No! This is not forward! That's not forward, this is not forward!
[rolls up onto Charlie's car]
Ted Early: Oh boy, that's bad. Oh God, I'm very sorry, Charlie. I'm so sorry.
Charlie Crews: [smiling, unperturbed, bites in to an apple]

"Life: Shelf Life (#2.17)" (2009/I)
Erin Cordette: You wouldn't understand, sir.
Charlie Crews: You don't expect a lot, do ya?
Erin Cordette: I get what I get, and I don't get upset, sir.

Charlie Crews: Come on, let's follow her.
Robert Stark: We don't have a warrant, or a ticket.
Charlie Crews: Come on, the door's open, we just walk on. That plane - you don't need a ticket if you look like you have a ticket.
Robert Stark: No, Charlie, *you* don't need a ticket, because you look like you have a ticket. Me? I need a ticket.

Young Woman: Is there anything else you need?
Charlie Crews: Well, if it's a specific question, I don't *need* anything. If it's a more general question...
Erin Cordette: Excuse me.
[leading him away]
Charlie Crews: ...Sometimes I think I don't need anything, but I do, and just don't know it.
Charlie Crews: [she hauls him into the restroom] Oh, is this what I need?

Gus Wilvern: You name is?
Charlie Crews: Charlie Crews.
Gus Wilvern: *That* Charlie Crews?
Charlie Crews: No, *this* Charlie Crews.
Gus Wilvern: The falsely-accused Charlie Crews.
Charlie Crews: No, Detective Charlie Crews.
Gus Wilvern: You look a lot different in person.
Charlie Crews: I *am* a lot different in person.

Pete Magnus: How'd you get in my perimeter?
Charlie Crews: Your mom. She's really friendly.

Charlie Crews: You wanna know how to beat it?
Dani Reese: You can beat a lie detector?
Charlie Crews: Yeah, it's easy. You just tell the truth.

"Life: Let Her Go (#1.3)" (2007/I)
Dani Reese: Are you really zen?
Charlie Crews: I'm zen-ish.
[Refering to his candy apple]
Charlie Crews: You want in on this?

Jennifer Conover: [Cruz pulls over his ex-wife and her husband] What do you want Charlie?
Charlie Crews: I want to be the unwobbling pivot at the center of an ever-revolving universe. I want to be still.
Jennifer Conover: What do you want here Charlie?
Charlie Crews: [Cruz pulls a photograph of Rachel from his jacket pocket] I want to know where she is.

[first lines]
Charlie Crews: I think I might go into space.
Dani Reese: Space?
Charlie Crews: Yeah, you can pay the Russians to take you up there now.
Dani Reese: So after spending 12 years in a box down here, you're going to pay the Russians to put you in a box up there?
Charlie Crews: I think they mentioned something about jet packs.

Dani Reese: Detective Reese, homicide.
Lee: It someone dead?
Charlie Crews: A lot of people are dead. Eventually everyone.

Jennifer Conover: What do you want, Charlie?
Charlie Crews: I want to be the un-wobbling pivot at the center of an ever revolving universe. I want to be still.

"Life: Everything... All the Time (#2.2)" (2008/I)
Dr. Lana James: My hourly rate is competitive. $450.
Dani Reese: $450 an *hour*?
Dr. Lana James: For a 50-minute hour, yes.
Charlie Crews: How could it be an hour if it's 50 minutes? That's messing with time... I do say everything that pops into my head. Maybe I should come back. If I wanted to make an appointment, who should I call?
Dr. Lana James: You should call another doctor.

Patrick Bridger: I'm not talking to you!
Charlie Crews: You just did.

Dani Reese: [about spoiled rich kids] They think it's their city.
Charlie Crews: It's not. It's our city.

Charlie Crews: [driving fast] This car is just an object. Objects have no meaning. They don't. Don't...
[big smile]

Jack Reese: What's with that car?
Charlie Crews: It's just an object - doesn't have any meaning. Even if it did, it would be in Italian, so I wouldn't understand it anyway.

"Life: Dig a Hole (#1.10)" (2007/I)
[about reincarnation]
Charlie Crews: I'd like to come back as a giant Flemish rabbit... fifteen pounds of pure bunny.

Dani Reese: So everyone going to that Zen center was just completely screwed up. Right?
Charlie Crews: People go there seeking peace. People seek what they don't have. Only troubled people seek peace.

Charlie Crews: I'm not here. You like that, don't you?
Dani Reese: If only that were true.

[first lines]
Dani Reese: [reading dead guy's T-shirt] "I'm with stupid." Isn't the arrow supposed to point at the person next to you?
Charlie Crews: I guess he was admitting the truth.
Dani Reese: That he was stupid?
Charlie Crews: That no one knows anything.
Dani Reese: I know he's dead.
Charlie Crews: That's not the truth, that's just a fact.

Charlie Crews: [to white horse in his living room] Hey, don't get too comfortable, you're not actually here.
Ted Earley: [from the other room] You're talking to the horse.
Charlie Crews: Let me ask you something. Even if something isn't actually there - just more likely to be there - why would you still look for it if you knew where it was.
Ted Earley: [from the other room] You're still talking to the horse.

"Life: One (#2.21)" (2009/I)
Charlie Crews: Do you know how I got through twelve years of prison?
Roman Nevikov: Your Zen?
Charlie Crews: [Gives Roman a precise karate chop to the throat, and watches him choke to death] Like that.

Mickey Rayborn: [Crews slams Rayborn to a wall] Easy, kiddo, I'm a dying man.
Charlie Crews: Except you're not *dying*.
Mickey Rayborn: We're all dying.
Charlie Crews: Some *sooner* than others.

Robert Stark: [On delivering an M-4 carbine to Crews] It's not zen Charlie.
Charlie Crews: It'll just have to do until zen comes along.

[first lines]
Charlie Crews: [videotaping] Your name is Roman Nevikov.
Roman Nevikov: My name is Roman Nevikov.
Charlie Crews: Aren't you supposed to be in prison?
Roman Nevikov: No man is supposed to be in prison.

Roman Nevikov: People have always liked to do favors for me. I don't know why.
Charlie Crews: Maybe it's because you'll kill their families if they don't.
Roman Nevikov: Yes, maybe.

"Life: The Business of Miracles (#2.3)" (2008/I)
Capt. Brian Tidwell: Human nature. Men and women working together *always* end up bangin', and most people are killed by the person they're bangin'.
Dani Reese: Well that's just not true.
Capt. Brian Tidwell: Yeah, it is. It's a fact. Come on, Crews, back me up on this.
Charlie Crews: Well, you two work together. When you have sex, who's gonna kill who?
Dani Reese: If I have sex with him, you're gonna kill *me* immediately.

Dani Reese: Is that from where the monkey hit you ?
Charlie Crews: [shakes head]
Dani Reese: Someone hit you after the monkey ?
Charlie Crews: [nods head]
Dani Reese: Do I want to know ?
Charlie Crews: [shakes head]
Dani Reese: Glad we could have this talk.

Charlie Crews: [suffering from hallucinations] Anybody else think this is weird?

[last lines]
Jennifer Conover: [slaps him] You asked my husband permission to have sex with me?
Charlie Crews: It was the honest thing to do.
Jennifer Conover: It was the stupid thing to do! When things like that happen, you pretend it didn't and you go on. You don't talk about it with the husband of the woman who you want to have sex with in the back of a car.
Charlie Crews: Do we want to pretend it never happened?
Jennifer Conover: That would be the civilized thing to do.
Charlie Crews: Do we want to be civilized?
Jennifer Conover: [scoffs and walks away]
Charlie Crews: Did you guys hear that? She was here, right? You saw her hit me...
Ted Earley, Dean Hal Orton: [dumbfounded nodding yes]

"Life: Re-Entry (#2.13)" (2009/I)
Doctor: Here you are. It's an unusual request, detective. Most people wouldn't want to have the bullet that shot them.
Charlie Crews: Well, someone gave it to me. It would be rude just to throw it away.

Narrator: When I wish to forgive another, what do I mean? I mean I wish to forgive myself. When I wish to harm another, what do I mean? I mean I wish to harm myself. Close your eyes and think of the world as seen from space. From that distance it is calm, silent, at peace. One.
Charlie Crews: [holding up the bullet he has just forged] calm, silent, and peace. One.

Charlie Crews: Make the call.
Special Agent Paul Bodner: What call?
Charlie Crews: The call that gets Ted Early out of prison.
Special Agent Paul Bodner: [dials on his cell phone] There, it's done.
Charlie Crews: What was that?
Special Agent Paul Bodner: Text message.
Charlie Crews: A call isn't even a call any more, it's a text?
[to himself]
Charlie Crews: I'm never catching up.

Charlie Crews: Can you imagine seeing the world from uo there? The Earth is floating. You are floating - everything is floating.
Dani Reese: I here there's a lot of barfing, and you crap into a vacuum.
Charlie Crews: Yeah, a floating vacuum.
Dani Reese: A floating vacuum? You don't even know what that means.
Charlie Crews: It's space talk.

"Life: Badge Bunny (#2.9)" (2008/I)
Charlie Crews: Got a sick cat?
Justin Tapp: Bad liver.
Charlie Crews: Maybe she should lay off the booze.
Justin Tapp: That's what I tell. But you know cats, they can be so willful.

Charlie Crews: [imagining his own wake] Pretty girls in black dresses, weeping quietly in small groups. Or all by themselves.

[last lines]
Mickey Rayborn: I think this is a kidnapping.
Charlie Crews: "Kidnapping." What does that really mean? We're not kids. No one's napping. We're just two guys talking, that's all.
Mickey Rayborn: No, no. You misunderstand me. This isn't kidnapping. *This*, detective, is kidnapping.
[his car window is suddenly smashed in]

Ted Earley: There are naked women in the pool.
Charlie Crews: Ted, I have made a decision.
Ted Earley: What's that, Charlie?
Charlie Crews: I'm going swimming.
Ted Earley: No man would hold that against you.

"Life: Black Friday (#2.8)" (2008/I)
Robert Stark: The body's gone?
Dani Reese: The body's gone.
Charlie Crews: It's a miracle. A genuine miracle.

Clay: If there's no body, how do you know someone's dead?
Charlie Crews: We have a test. It's called the dead test. Mitchel Clark passed.
Clay: Oh dude, I'd hate to take that test.

Charlie Crews: The guy in the bookstore
[holds up book]
Charlie Crews: told me that in four days I could learn to speak Dutch. Four days, Reese! By Tuesday, what I'm saying to you now, I could say to you in Dutch. Mmm, the woman at Opticals told me
[holds up glasses]
Charlie Crews: that with the shape of face you have, you should be wearing these frames. Put 'em on.
Dani Reese: How does she know the shape of my face?
Charlie Crews: I described you. By Tuesday I could describe you in Dutch.

Charlie Crews: [eating confiscated fruit cake]
Dani Reese: You liking that?
Charlie Crews: There's a distinct possibility that this isn't fruit or cake.

"Life: A Civil War (#1.7)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: [Techie #1 starts Prince of Persia video game] You think you can get to level 10?
Techie #1: Detective, I'm thirty years old; I live with my mother and, I have a Captain Kirk costume in my closet.

[first lines]
Charlie Crews: I want to tell you about the dream I had last night.
Ted Earley: Were there clowns in it?
Charlie Crews: No.
Ted Earley: I don't like dreams with clowns.
Charlie Crews: Who does? Although there are no clowns in this dream.

Dani Reese: How long have I been awake?
Charlie Crews: Are you sure we *are* awake? Maybe this is a dream. Maybe life is a dream, and we wake up when we die.

Olivia: There's references to a file but I can't find the file.
Charlie Crews: What's it called?
Olivia: Farrah Level 10.
Charlie Crews: He plays his video game... a game console is like a computer, isn't it?

"Life: Not for Nothing (#2.4)" (2008/I)
Charlie Crews: [questioning Janis' roommate] And you haven't seen Janis?
Glenda: Not for five glorious days. What did she do? Are you here to, like, give her an award?
Charlie Crews: Yeah, something like that. She likes the moose.
Glenda: She *is* the moose. Does all the games. I forgot to put "no collegiate costume mascots" on my roommate info sheet. So now I live with Mitchopher Moose.
Charlie Crews: [Looks at Janis' calendar] "BW," new boyfriend?
Glenda: I don't pay attention. It's kinda like Hello Kitty ate the Disney Channel and threw it up onto that side of the room.
Charlie Crews: Janis use email?
Glenda: No, she rocks the telegraph "There Will Be Blood" style.

Charlie Crews: [to caught murderer] Just because you're in there doesn't mean you have to be there. You can go somewhere else.

Charlie Crews: I think you might wanna help us.
Frat Boy: And why's that?
Charlie Crews: You want the short answer or the long answer?
Frat Boy: Short.
Charlie Crews: 'Cause.
Frat Boy: Okay, the long.
Charlie Crews: Because I am about 3 seconds from deciding that I just do not like you.

"Life: I Heart Mom (#2.15)" (2009/I)
[first lines]
Charlie Crews: The house has no roof.
Dani Reese: Noticed that.
Charlie Crews: All the other houses have roofs.
Dani Reese: Noticed that.
Charlie Crews: Maybe someone stole it.
Dani Reese: Who would steal a roof?
Charlie Crews: Maybe kids stole it.
Charlie Crews: Kids will steal anything that isn't nailed down, anything. I know I did, when I was a kid.

Charlie Crews: Most likely, these companies didn't do anything. Let's go find out who these companies didn't do anything to.
Dani Reese: Who these companies didn't do anything to? Do you have to talk like that?
Charlie Crews: Like what? I don't think I talk differently than anyone else does. Maybe, sometimes, I don't not say things that other people don't not say, but most other people don't not say the same things I don't. You know what I'm saying?

Ian Ryker: How long have you two been together? What do you say, Sasha, about 2 years?
Sasha: I'd say 3 years. Yeah.
Charlie Crews: It *has* actually been about 2 years. How do you know that?
Ian Ryker: Over 3 years, you stand further apart. Much further.
Sasha: And you don't hold hands, but still you two seem like...
Dani Reese: We're not married, we're partners.
Charlie Crews: She has commitment issues.

"Life: Serious Control Issues (#1.9)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: I investigate things to complete my knowledge.
Charlie Crews: My complete knowledge makes my thoughts sincere.
Charlie Crews: My thoughts being sincere, my heart is pure.

Charlie Crews: It's not going to be easy for you. You're never going to be like everyone else.
Nate: Because of what happened to me?
Charlie Crews: Yeah.
Nate: How do you know that?
Charlie Crews: Because of what happened to me.
Nate: What happened to you?
Charlie Crews: Same thing that happened to you.

Dani Reese: If I had your money... I'd be on a beach somewhere. How come you're not on a beach somewhere?
Charlie Crews: Do I look like I tan?

"Life: Powerless (#1.6)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: Hate is a prison. But you know what, Rick? Prison is a prison too.

Charlie Crews: Every moment you spend wishing you were someplace else is a moment you can't get back.
Dani Reese: What about every moment I spend wishing you were someplace else.
Charlie Crews: If would hurt my feelings if I thought you meant it.

Charlie Crews: [speaking to AA group] Hate is a prison. Anger is the warden, and rage - rage is the guard who takes a piece of you every day.

"Life: Evil... and His Brother Ziggy (#2.10)" (2009/I)
Charlie Crews: [observing a beekeeper] 30% of our food supply is dependent on bees for pollination. Fruits, nuts, vegetables, all need bees.
Dani Reese: Well, I'm pretty sure you don't need bees to make a bacon cheeseburger.

Dani Reese: [in hotel room] I've made up my mind. I'm taking both beds.
Charlie Crews: Where am I going to sleep?

Captain Whitehat: [dining] How long have you been together?
Charlie Crews: Since we met in prison.
Ted Earley: But we're not... "together".
Rachel Seybolt: [walks in and plops down next to Whitehat]
Captain Whitehat: This isn't your daughter?
Charlie Crews: No. She's not my niece. And there's not a boy not playing a guitar at the other end of a phone call.
Rachel Seybolt: That's right, there's not.
Charlie Crews: Look, Rachel, I was worried.
Rachel Seybolt: No, *he* was worried.
[indicating Ted]
Rachel Seybolt: *You* were gone. I came home, you weren't here. I called, you didn't pick up.
Charlie Crews: I was in the middle of no where.
Captain Whitehat: By that he means my home.
Rachel Seybolt: They come and go.
[stomps off]
Ted Earley: I'm in love with Olivia, Charlie. I'm in love with woman who is going to marry your father.
[wanders away from the table]
Charlie Crews: [scoffs to Whitehat] White people.

"Life: The Fallen Woman (#1.5)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: It's a dead angel.
Dani Reese: It's a woman with a pair of fake wings.
Charlie Crews: How do you know?
Dani Reese: I know the wings are fake because I can see the harness right there.
Charlie Crews: Maybe she's a real angel with fake wings.
Dani Reese: Why would a real angel have... No. No, I'm not doing this with you.

Charlie Crews: We started out looking for an angel. And know we're staring at the devil.

Dani Reese: [through lock door] Oliver Sanderson, we have a warrant to search these premises.
Charlie Crews: I have a passkey.
[draws his gun and kicks it open]

"Life: Jackpot (#2.7)" (2008/I)
Charlie Crews: I do that too.
Rachel Seybolt: Do what?
Charlie Crews: What you just did. Tell a total stranger the absolute truth. It helps sometimes.

[last lines]
Rachel Seybolt: Is that the absolute truth you tell to a total stranger?
Charlie Crews: Yeah, I guess it is. You wanna know something else? A kitchen table isn't clutter. A kitchen table's a kitchen table.

"Life: Initiative 38 (#2.20)" (2009/I)
Ted Earley: Charlie. What are you thinking?
Charlie Crews: I'm thinking about what I want and what I need.
Ted Earley: What do you want?
Charlie Crews: I want a peaceful soul.
Ted Earley: And what do you need?
Charlie Crews: I need a bigger gun.

Jane Seever: I would vote for you.
Charlie Crews: Oh, you don't have to sat that.
Jane Seever: I know, but I would. I think you'd make a good mayor.
Charlie Crews: I wouldn't want to be mayor.
Jane Seever: That's why you would be such a good one.
Charlie Crews: Is that Zen?
Jane Seever: It is?

"Life: Trapdoor (#2.12)" (2008/I)
Rachel Seybolt: You don't have to drive around in a car full of bullet holes, you know.
Charlie Crews: Yeah I do. Maybe just for a little while longer.

Captain Kevin Tidwell: Oh, you must be the grown up.
Special Agent Paul Bodner: Special Agent Bodner, FBI.
Charlie Crews: Are you all Special Agents? Because if you're all special, then none of you are really special then, right?
Special Agent Paul Bodner: Trust me, I'm special.

"Life: Crushed (#2.5)" (2008/I)
Dani Reese: Do men have to be disgusting... I mean, isn't there an operation you guys can get?
Charlie Crews: I think they're working on a pill.

Charlie Crews: That's what the newspaper said.
Ted Earley: You don't believe them?
Charlie Crews: Newspaper said I was guilty.
Ted Earley: Yeah. They said I was guilty too.
Charlie Crews: Ted, you *were* guilty.
Ted Earley: I know, but it still hurt to see it there like that, in print.

"Life: Fill It Up (#1.11)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: [to gunmen while hanging upside down in his crashed car] Are you upside down, now, or am I upside down. It's kinda hard to tell...

"Life: Did You Feel That? (#2.6)" (2008/I)
Charlie Crews: If only we had a really big book that listed everybody's name, addresses and phone numbers...
Captain Tidwell: Dude, you are old school.

"Life: 5 Quarts (#2.19)" (2009/I)
Charlie Crews: I guess we'll have to make two reports.
Jane Seever: Homicide and... robbery.
Charlie Crews: Someone stole his blood.

"Life: Tear Asunder (#1.2)" (2007/I)
Dani Reese: Why can't you talk like a normal person.
Charlie Crews: When exactly was the last time you met a "normal" person?

"Life: Find Your Happy Place (#2.1)" (2008/I)
[first lines]
11 Yr Old Boy: Is that a real gun?
Charlie Crews: Yes, it is.
11 Yr Old Boy: Can I touch it?
Charlie Crews: No, you cannot.
Mother: He wants to be a policeman when he grows up.
11 Yr Old Boy: You ever shoot anybody?
Charlie Crews: Violence against one, is violence against all. Violence against all, is violence against myself.
11 Yr Old Boy: Yeah. But did you ever shoot anybody?
Charlie Crews: Nobody.
[leans in closer]
Charlie Crews: That didn't have it coming.

"Life: Hit Me Baby (#2.16)" (2009/I)
Robert Stark: I'm very very married.
Trish: How about you, cutie. Are you married?
Charlie Crews: Yes, I'm married.
Robert Stark: You are not married.
Charlie Crews: Married to the law. I'm married to the law.

"Life: Farthingale (#1.8)" (2007/I)
Charlie Crews: [answering call from Dani] How come you only call me when someone's dead?

"Life: Mirror Ball (#2.14)" (2009/I)
[first lines]
Charlie Crews: You ever have a nickname?
Dani Reese: Nope. I never did.
Charlie Crews: Would you like one?
Dani Reese: No!
Charlie Crews: Come on, I'm real go at 'em. Want me to give you one?
Dani Reese: Cruise...
Charlie Crews: That's *my* name. It would be confusing if your nickname was my name.