Aunt Hilda
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Aunt Hilda (Character)
from "Sabrina, the Teenage Witch" (1996)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Five Easy Pieces of Libby (#2.14)" (1998)
Zelda Spellman: I've done it! I'm on the verge of one of the biggest scientific breakthroughs in the history of mankind.
Salem Saberhagen: How incredible!
[to Sabrina]
Salem Saberhagen: You gonna finish that toast?
Zelda Spellman: You know that formula I've been working on? I found the key ingredient.
Sabrina Spellman: Liquorice?
Zelda Spellman: Oh, don't be silly, Sabrina, liquorice won't cure allergies. It's ostrich saliva.
Hilda Spellman: [to Sabrina] The hard part is getting them to drool. Give me that.
[Reaches for Zelda's beaker, which smashes on the floor; the entire room is suddenly spotless]
Sabrina Spellman: Wow! One drop of that and the whole kitchen is spotlessly clean!
Hilda Spellman: I'll say! The walls, the table, the counters...
Sabrina Spellman: Salem!
Salem Saberhagen: [Salem has turned completely white] I'm blonde! My IQ just dropped twenty points.
Zelda Spellman: [Pointing at Sabrina, Hilda and herself] Blonde, blonde, blonde.
[Pointing at Salem]
Zelda Spellman: Dead.

Salem Saberhagen: Man! This house is so spotless and germ free Howard Hughes could live here!
Hilda Spellman: Zelda, if we could market this stuff, we'd make a fortune!
Salem Saberhagen: Good luck! The FDA will never approve of ostrich saliva. Those pencil pushing bureaucrats have ruined many a dream.
Hilda Spellman: Well, we could still sell it in the Other Realm. What do you say, Zeldy?
Zelda Spellman: No. I made this formula to cure allergies and end suffering, not to whiten.
Hilda Spellman: You ever cleaned a toilet? That's suffering! Besides, you said it didn't even cure allergies.
Zelda Spellman: Yet! Medical breakthroughs take time, get off my back! This is why Pasteur broke up with you!
Hilda Spellman: He told me he had to work out stuff with his Mother!
Salem Saberhagen: You gotta hand it to Zelda. She's a pillar of integrity.
Hilda Spellman: Yeah. Let's steal her formula!

Hilda Spellman: [Hilda and Salem approach Zelda's lab] The coast is clear! Operation "Find the Allergy Formula, That Also Cleans, Don't Get Caught and Make a Lot of Money" is underway.
Salem Saberhagen: You start looking, and I'll start workin' on a shorter code name.

Hilda Spellman: [Hilda and Salem have made a commercial for their new cleaning product] Here it comes!
Hilda Spellman: [On TV, holding up a stone] This dungeon stone is white, but what would you call this one?
[Holds up a whiter stone]
Salem Saberhagen: Bright!
Hilda Spellman: Exactly! And that's why, for the next twenty minutes, we'll be telling you how you can get your house this clean with new Scientist-in-a-Drum!
Salem Saberhagen: And now, here's Bruce Jenner to tell you more.

Zelda Spellman: Is that all there is?
Sabrina Spellman: [Some pieces of Libby are missing] Box is empty, how can we be missing pieces?
Quizmaster Albert: Didn't you read the fine print?
[Hands the box over to Sabrina]
Sabrina Spellman: [Reading box] Some pieces not included in box? What a rip-off!
Quizmaster Albert: I guess you didn't see this either.
[Gives Sabrina an hourglass]
Quizmaster Albert: Now if you don't find the missing pieces and put them in before the sand runs out, Libby will be a puzzle forever.
Sabrina Spellman: What?
Hilda Spellman: Boy! In the final analysis, the Libby puzzle isn't much fun, is it?

Zelda Spellman: Sabrina, I don't think I told you this, but, in my opinion, your Democracy Daze float was the best.
Sabrina Spellman: Thanks! It did turn out great.
Zelda Spellman: It's going to stand as a monument to your creative talent and democratic spirit.
Sabrina Spellman: Not really. When we got back to the school, the engine Harvey'd been working on blew up, and the whole thing burned to the ground.
Hilda Spellman: Ever reminding us that democracy is a fragile thing.

"Sabrina: Secrets of a Teenage Witch: Chariots of Fear (#1.24)" (2014)
Hilda Spellman: [on the motorbike's engine] This things got the same sounding problem as me. Ha! I'll just have to go easy on the throttle.
Hilda Spellman: [riding off] I have a hard time going easy on the throttle!

Hilda Spellman: [after running into a glass door] Oh, typical clumsy me!

Hilda Spellman: Oopsie doodles!

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Hilda and Zelda: the Teenage Years (#1.15)" (1997)
[Hilda and Zelda just turned themselves into teenagers]
Sabrina Spellman: Your voices don't sound teenage.
Zellary - Young Zelda: [in her own voice] We can change that.
[Zelda works her magic]
Zellary - Young Zelda: [teenage voice] Is this better?
Hillary - Young Hilda: [in a deep manly voice] And how about me? Hee Hee Hee. Oops. Wrong direction
Hillary - Young Hilda: [teenage voice] There we go.

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: She's Baaaack! (#4.20)" (2000)
Sabrina Spellman: Well, since Cousin Amanda's visiting for the weekend, I thought to get her a little present!
[conjures up a pillory, a heavy wooden structure with apertures for restraint]
Hilda Spellman: That's a thoughtful gift from all of us!
Zelda Spellman: Now, now, she's family. We should welcome her with open arms!
[conjures the punitive device away]
Zelda Spellman: And if she tries anything, we have an electric cage in the basement.

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: A River of Candy Corn Runs Through It (#2.7)" (1997)
Hilda Spellman: [Hilda and Zelda are making Candy corn in a couldron] May I lick the bowl?
Zelda Spellman: Yes. Of course, you'll be horribly burned...

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Quiz Show (#2.22)" (1998)
Hilda Spellman: I've got it! I remember how to turn myself into fire.
Salem Saberhagen: If it involves dried branches and kerosene, it's not really magic.

"Sabrina: Secrets of a Teenage Witch: What a Ride (#1.22)" (2014)
Zelda Spellman: How's it going?
Hilda Spellman: I don't know. I'm suppose to beat a dozen eggs, but this doesn't look quite right.
Zelda Spellman: I think your suppose to crack the eggs first.
Hilda Spellman: Oh, that would make things less crunchy.

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Pilot (#1.1)" (1996)
Sabrina: So what are you saying? That I'm not who I think I am? You're not who I think you are? And my father lives in a book?
Hilda: [scoffs] Finally, she gets it!

"Sabrina: Secrets of a Teenage Witch: Home Sweet Home (#1.19)" (2014)
Amy: So what, now they're not gonna turn this place into a mall?
Sabrina Spellman: Nope. The guy that was gonna tear us down changed his mind.
Amy: Well, what about my needs? I need a place to buy clothes and jewelery and shoes. You think I just roll out of bed looking this good? Well, of course I do. But that's just because I wear designer pajamas. But I can't wear those out of the house. Although I'd still be better dressed than either of you. But a mall...
Sabrina Spellman: [as Amy continues to talk] Hey, is that the hat from the silent wizard who never said a word?
Hilda Spellman: Yes, I was just about to de-magic it.
Sabrina Spellman: Let me borrow it for a sec.
Amy: [continuing] And shoes that are better than yours. And get my nails done to be better than yours.
Sabrina Spellman: Hey, Amy, try this on.
Amy: What? Why would I wanna wear that? It doesn't go with anything I have on, and I...
[Sabrina places the wizard hat on Amy's head]
Amy: [speaks, but is alarmed not to hear her own voice]
Hilda Spellman: I really should take that hat to the back room.
Sabrina Spellman: I know. Just let me enjoy it for one more minute.

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Meeting Dad's Girlfriend (#1.20)" (1997)
Sabrina Spellman: So, you think you'll get married?
Edward Spellman: [at the same time as Gail] No.
Gail Kippling: [at the same time as Edward] Yes.
Gail Kippling: Did you say no?
Edward Spellman: Yes. Didn't you?
Gail Kippling: No.
Edward Spellman: You said yes?
Gail Kippling: Yes.
Edward Spellman: When I said no?
Gail Kippling: Yes.
Edward Spellman: That's not good.
Gail Kippling: No,
Edward Spellman: Are you upset?
Gail Kippling: Yes.
Edward Spellman: Would you like to talk?
Gail Kippling: No.
Edward Spellman: I think we should.
Hilda Spellman, Zelda Spellman: Yes!

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: The Equalizer (#2.17)" (1998)
Hilda: Oh, by the way, Zelda and I are chaperoning the school dance Friday.
Sabrina: What? Why don't you just hang a big "Nerd Girl" sign around my neck?
Hilda: Okay.
[She points and Sabrina gets her wish]
Sabrina: Nobody likes a house where you can't speak figuratively.

"Sabrina, the Teenage Witch: Third Aunt from the Sun (#1.7)" (1996)
Hilda Spellman: The party's over. Sabrina's coming home.
Vesta Spellman: You know the rules around here. Now that Sabrina's at the pleasuredome, she can do whatever she wants.
Zelda Spellman: [Scoffs] So that's your plan!
Vesta Spellman: Please. I don't plan. I scheme.