Lilly Truscott
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Quotes for
Lilly Truscott (Character)
from "Hannah Montana" (2006)

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"Hannah Montana: Lilly, Do You Want to Know a Secret? (#1.1)" (2006)
Hannah Montana: Um, hey Amber, I think it's time to pluck the 'stache
Lilly Truscott: and Ashley...
[gasps]
Lilly Truscott: ...is that a zit or are you growing a new head!
Hannah Montana, Lilly Truscott: [they lean in and examine Amber and Ashley's faces] Eww!

Lilly Truscott: [after she sneaks into Hannah's Dressing room] Hannah Montana!
Hannah Montana: Whoever you are, you have to get out of here right now or I'll call security!
Lilly Truscott: Wait, wait no!, I'm sorry I was just looking for a souvenir, My name's Lilly Truscott and I'm a *huge* fan!
Lilly Truscott: [Hannah closes her eyes and stares at a pie, then shoves it in her face] Did you just shove pie in your face?
Hannah Montana: It's not a real pie. It's ummm. A foaming facial wash... Pie.

Lilly Truscott: Booger check!
Hannah Montana: Uhh, you are so... gross!

Lilly Truscott: [after Hannah's cell phone rings] Aren't you gonna get that?
Hannah Montana: No I'm talking to you that would be rude!

Lilly Truscott: Miley don't make me go see my favorite singer without my best friend. If you don't take this ticket, I'm going to end up going to the concert with Mr. Hannah Montana.

Lilly Truscott: Wow, that was weird.

Lilly Truscott: What size shoe do you wear?
Miley Stewart: I'm a five.
Lilly Truscott: I'm a six, but I'll squeeze!

Fairmaine: I love you Hannah Montana!
Jackson Stewart: Do you mind? I am on the phone here, all right? I've got a life too you know. And I would appreciate it if I could have one conversation without hearing the words Hannah Montana.
[on the phone]
Jackson Stewart: Yeah, that's right girl, I know Hannah Montana!
[Hannah/Miley rolls her eyes]
Jackson Stewart: And I got two incredible tickets for tomorrow night, great we'll see you then!
[hangs up phone and turns to Hannah/Miley]
Jackson Stewart: I need two incredible seats for tomorrow night!
Hannah Montama: Sorry, I'm sold out!
Jackson Stewart: Dad!
Robbie Stewart: Hey think about it this way Miley, he goes out with the girl, they fall in love, they get married and he moves out.
Hannah Montama: [tosses her jacket on the couch turns to Robbie and Jackson and points both index fingers at them] You've got the tickets
Miley Stewart: [phone rings] Hello?
Lilly Truscott: [yelling] Hey it's me, landing in twenty seconds!
Miley Stewart: Great!
Miley Stewart: Lilly alert in 18 seconds!
[takes off wig and jacket grabs another jacket and puts it on]
Jackson Stewart: She's your best friend Miley, sooner or later your gonna have to tell her your Hannah Montana.
Miley Stewart: I pick later!
Robbie Stewart: 9 seconds, get the juice!
Miley Stewart: Got it!
Robbie Stewart: Good!
Robbie Stewart: 3!
Jackson Stewart: [opens the door] 2!
Miley Stewart: 1!
Lilly Truscott: Guess who just landed two tickets to the hottest concert in town! Miley, you and I, I being your best friend, are going to see, the one, the only, Hannah Montana! Woo!
[Miley's eyes double in size]
Lilly Truscott: You're not screaming, why aren't you screaming?
Jackson Stewart: Oh believe me, she's screaming on the inside.
[Robbie wraps his arm around Jackson's mouth]
Jackson Stewart: [Miley screams in her head]

Lilly Truscott: [crawls on a rotating closet that Miley just showed her the opposite way] Cut me some slack Hannah!
Miley Stewart: Hannah? I knew this would happen!
Lilly Truscott: Did I say Hannah? I didn't mean that, it was a mistake!
Miley Stewart: No! The mistake was trusting you!
[Lilly stops crawling and the rotating closet carries her into the back]

Lilly Truscott: Ok, we didn't get those seats. Minor setback. but the good news is
[starts whispering]
Lilly Truscott: we have better seats for Hannah Montana!
Miley Stewart: I'm sorry, it's just that, I don't like Hannah Montana
[pulls her hair behind her head and starts eating]
Lilly Truscott: [leans down until her head is almost even with the table] What?
Oliver Oken: [walks in and starts talking to girls] Hey baby, how are you doing?... Oliver Oken, and may I say you two, are smokin'
Amber: In your dreams.
Oliver Oken: I'm countin' on that!
[walks past another girl]
Oliver Oken: Hey slick!... Hey! Oh yeah, she wants me.
Lilly Truscott: Oliver, you're not going to believe this! Miley says she "doesn't" like Hannah Montana!
Oliver Oken: What! Hannah Montana is a goddess! I worship at her feet!, in fact, FYI someday I'm gonna be Mr. Hannah Montana.
[Miley's eyebrows go halfway up her forehead]
Oliver Oken: I'm gonna watch her every minute of every day, and protect her from any obsessed fans, and every night I''m gonna shampoo and condition that beautiful "blonde" hair.
Miley Stewart: Oliver, I say this because I care about you, *get some help*!

Lilly Truscott: [Hannah stands behind the coat rack and moves clothes in front of her face so Lilly can't see her] I just wish Miley were here.
Hannah Montana: [talks fast] Uh, Miley, who's Miley, I don't know Miley, that's a strange name.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, she's my best friend.
Hannah Montana: [spreads clothes on coat rack and steps through it, then she runs to the door and opens it] Right! Well then, why don't you go get her.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, great idea, I'll call her
[takes out cell phone]
Hannah Montana: [closes door] No!
[walks up to her]
Hannah Montana: You know, cell phones don't really work in here, it has to do with the walls and the cement and...
[her cell phone starts ringing and she looks down at it]
Hannah Montana: OK, they must've fixed it.
Lilly Truscott: [Lilly's mouth opens] Aren't you gonna get that?
Hannah Montana: Uh, uh, uh, uh, No! I'm talking to you that would be rude.
[phone ring more]
Hannah Montana: Ok, she's not home
[closes Lilly's cell phone]
Lilly Truscott: Wow, that was weird!
Hannah Montana: [reaches for a pen and a picture] Uh, why don't I just give you an autograph for her.
Oliver Oken: What about me, I'm the one who loves you!
[Hannah closes her eyes]
Oliver Oken: [see's the pie on Hannah's face] Your much paler in person
Hannah Montana: Yeah, and you know what, gosh it was real fun meetin' you guys but I really gotta go.
Oliver Oken: Wait! Can't I shampoo and condition your beautiful blonde hair?
Hannah Montana: No! But you can take this towel.
[throws him the towel she wiped pie out of her eyes with]
Oliver Oken: Hannah Montana's towel!
[falls from window]
Oliver Oken: [crashing noises] Its ok, none of my blood got on the towel!
Lilly Truscott: Well, I guess I'm leaving too.
Hannah Montana: [motions her out the door] OK!
Lilly Truscott: Without even a towel as a souvenir.
Hannah Montana: [motions her out of the room again] Buh bye!
Lilly Truscott: Nothing but my memories, which will fade, too, too, quickly.
[turns back around]
Hannah Montana: All right all right! Here!
[hands her a scarf]
Lilly Truscott: Oh my gosh!
[puts scarf around her neck]
Lilly Truscott: The actual scarf you wore on the actual stage!
[Hannah grabs the autograph and hands it to her]
Lilly Truscott: I can't believe. Hey I have a lucky bracelet just like that! I loaned it to my best friend yesterday. Of course mine says Lilly on the back...
[looks at bottom of bracelet]
Lilly Truscott: Just like that.
[wipes pie off of Hannah's face]
Hannah Montana: Ta da!

Hannah Montana: [takes some toilet paper and wipes pie off her face] Lilly, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but you cannot just freeze me out like this, please talk to me.
Lilly Truscott: I thought we were friends, I thought we told each other everything. But I guess I was wrong, since you kept just about the biggest secret in the world! Miley Stewart slash Hannah Montana!

Lilly Truscott: We do do that... what?
Jackson Stewart: You said, "do-do"!

Lilly Truscott: [When sneaking into Hannah Montana's dressing room] Whoa... that's not good...
[lands]
Lilly Truscott: AND SHE STICKS THE LANDING!

Lilly Truscott: I can't believe my best friend won't come with me to see my favorite singer! If you don't come with me I'll have to go with Mr. Hannah Montana.


"Hannah Montana: More Than a Zombie to Me (#1.15)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: Ah, man, you made me miss his muscles... his zombie slaying muscles.
Miley Stewart: Lilly build a bridge and get over it.

Jake Ryan: Miley you seemed nervous when asked you to the dance at school which is to be expected cause look at me.
Lilly Truscott: I do, all the time even when you don't know it.
Lilly Truscott: Did I just say that out loud?
Miley Stewart: yes!

Miley Stewart: Oh no! This is horrible! Not only do I have to kiss him, but my lips fall off!
Lilly Truscott: No it's okay see, he reattaches them with his love.
Lilly Truscott: Awww!
Miley Stewart: EWWWWW!

Lilly Truscott: Since when do you like Jake?
Miley Stewart: Since he saved me from going to the Portal of the Underworld. Those kinds of things make you realize what's important in life

Lilly Truscott: What are you doing? Your supposed to be at a 70's dance! Not turning letters on a game show!
Miley Stewart: OH MY GOD! I completley forgot! I hope i don't stand out!

Miley Stewart: Lilly, I am trying to tell you something!
Lilly Truscott: What? That your pants are too tight?

Lilly Truscott: Hmmm. Over the ears or behind the ears. Oh! One over and one behind! Oh, yeah! I'm good!
Miley Stewart: Ugh!
Lilly Truscott: Hey! My ears aren't that bad!
Miley Stewart: UGH!
Lilly Truscott: Ok, no ears.
Miley Stewart: Hello? I'm trying to tell you something Lilly!
Lilly Truscott: What? Your pants are on too tight?
Miley Stewart: No, guess which pop teen singer is getting a role in "Zombie High"
Lilly Truscott: Paula Abdul!
Miley Stewart: No, Hannah Montana.
Lilly Truscott: Are you serious! Wait, you don't know how to act.
Miley Stewart: Yes I do! I act like all of Oliver's jokes are funny. I act like I'm not Hannah Montana. And I acted like I liked that sweater that you wore yesterday.
Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: I loved it, I was acting. Or was I?
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! You are good!

Lilly Truscott: I'll just wash the sherbet out of my wig... with my tears.

Jake Ryan: Hey Miley, wow, you look great!
Lilly Truscott: Really? I think she looks like a FIRETRUCK.

Lilly Truscott: So... what are you saying?
Miley Stewart: Gives Lily a weird look
Lilly Truscott: That I'm the canned fruit cup you get when they're all out of the chocolate pudding!

Lilly Truscott: So, what are you saying? That I'm the canned fruit cup you get when they're all out of the chocolate pudding.
Miley Stewart: What?
Lilly Truscott: You know what I mean. Well I've got news for you. The Jake ship has sailed... And you're not on it... I'm in a first class cabin.
Miley Stewart: Just leave mad already.
Lilly Truscott: Happily.
[both walk off in opposite directions, then come back]
Miley Stewart: My house is this way.
Lilly Truscott: My house is that way.

Lilly Truscott: Who knew photosynthesis had nothing to do with photography.


"Hannah Montana: Miley, Get Your Gum (#1.2)" (2006)
Hannah Montana: [they all get in the limo] Thank you! I love you all!Thank you! Thank you!
[takes off her wig]
Hannah Montana: That was great! Oliver stared right into my eyes and never had a clue.
Lilly Truscott: [dressed up as Lola Luftnagle] Kinda like the look he has in spanish
Hannah Montana, Lilly Truscott: No comprendo!
Hannah Montana: I don't know what I was so worried about anyways
Lilly Truscott: Yeah
[opens the moon roof and Oliver pops through it]
Lilly Truscott: [They all scream, Hannah covers her face with the dog, Lilly/Lola puts Hannah's hat back on, and Robbie grabs the wig]
Robbie Stewart: Pull over driver!
Oliver Oken: Don't be scared, its me, Oliver Oken,
[Hannah puts her wig back on under cover of the dog]
Oliver Oken: wow, your even more beautiful upside down!
Lilly Truscott: Oh... Thank you! Your so sweet!
Hannah Montana: He was talking to me!
[to Oliver]
Hannah Montana: Look, you are very sweet,but, I have a boyfriend.
Oliver Oken: A boyfriend? Wait, I don't understand, then why'd you kiss me?
Hannah Montana: I didn't, the dog did.
[Holds Thor-the dog-up to Olivers face and Thor licks him]
Oliver Oken: Aww man! Those are the lips I've been thinking about for the past 24 hours!
Hannah Montana: [her wig gets turned around and Lilly pars the front so she can see out] I'm sorry,I was trying not to hurt your feelings,its just that, I'm just not interested,ok?
Oliver Oken: ok, I get it
Robbie Stewart: Now get down off the roof son before you dent it, this is a rental.
Oliver Oken: fine, I won't bother you anymore.
Lilly Truscott: [holds her hair in front of her face and Hannah pulls apart her hair so she can see Lola/Lily] If it helps, the dog hasn't stopped talking about you.
Oliver Oken: You must think I'm pathetic.
Hannah Montana: No, I think you sweet
[parts her hair so she can see]
Hannah Montana: and maybe if i didn't have a boyfriend...
Oliver Oken: I'd have a chance with you?
Hannah Montana: I never said that!
Oliver Oken: But you implied it!and thats good enough!I'll wait for you forever!
Hannah Montana: But I never said that!
Oliver Oken: Forever! Do you hear me Hannah Montana!Forever!

Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but that friend didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. And there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Miley Stewart: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I mean, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, and I think Hannah and you could wind up being close friends someday.
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think.
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]

Lilly Truscott: This is crazy! Back off, people! Don't make me release Thor!

Miley Stewart: [Pulls Oliver and Lilly together] What about Lilly? You guys would be perfect together.
Lilly Truscott: Excuse me?
Miley Stewart: You're both stubborn
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: I am not!
Miley Stewart: Se, you always agree with each other.
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: No we don't!
Miley Stewart: I am *definitely* seeing a couple here.
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: You're not because I'm not! Whoo!

Miley Stewart: Either you have a great idea or you really have to go
Lilly Truscott: Oliver is about to get totally turned off by Hannah Montana and I really have to go
[runs off quickly]

Robbie Stewart: You know what that boy needs? A real girlfriend.
Hannah Montana: Dad,that is, the smartest thing you've ever said
Robbie Stewart: You know what they say, every now and then even a blind pig snorts up a truffle
Lilly Truscott: and that is the wierdest
[Hannah/Miley nodds]

Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. and there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Miley Stewart, Lilly Truscott: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, I think Hannah and you could wnd up being close friends
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]

Lilly Truscott: And here's the beauty part... If Oliver dies, you won't have to bury him in the backyard!
Miley Stewart: When you talk, do you hear it, or is it like a big roaring in your ears?

Lilly Truscott: Just remember Oliver, if it doesn't work out, your still Smoken' Oken.
Oliver Oken: Don't worry, it will work out.
Lilly Truscott: Right! But if it doesn't, Smoken' Oken. Nuf' said.

Miley Stewart: Either you have a great idea or you really have to
Lilly Truscott: Oliver is about to get totally turned off by Hannah Montana and I really have to go
[runs off quickly]

Lilly Truscott: Unless, maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way.
[Miley looks at Oliver who is rubbing the Hannah hand on his face]
Miley Stewart: Yes and maybe just maybe THAT'S INSANE!

Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. and there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Lilly Truscott, Miley Stewart: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, I think Hannah and you could wnd up being close friends
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]


"Hannah Montana: People Who Use People (#1.18)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Just look for cool, older guys.
Willis: Hey Miley!
Miley Stewart: Hey Willis! Who's your friend?
Willis: Oh! This is my best friend Mike! Mike this is the girl I was telling you about. What do you think?
Mike: Hubba Hubba!
[sprays Miley with silly string]
Miley Stewart: How old is he?
Willis: I know, I know. He looks 10 but he's really 12.
Lilly Truscott: Isn't weird to hang out with people younger than you?
Willis: Well, truth is, Mike's older than me.
Oliver Oken: How old are you?
Willis: I'm 11, and 3/4.
Miley Stewart: You're 11.
Willis: And 3/4.
Miley Stewart: Watchu talkin bout Willis?
Miley Stewart: How can you be 11?
Lilly Truscott: And 3/4
Miley Stewart: NOT HELPING!
Miley Stewart: And take that giraffe off of your head.
Willis: UHHHH! It's a dragon!
Miley Stewart: Whatever, it's a balloon hat.
Oliver Oken: Look at the brightside she can babysit him for extra money.
Miley Stewart: You said you were graduating.
Willis: I AM!
Miley Stewart: Elementary school.
Willis: Sorry! I just wanted to see what it would feel like being at a party with you know an older babe.

Lilly Truscott: Miley you either confront him now or later?
Miley Stewart: I pick later.
[turns around to leave, they turn her back around]
Miley Stewart: I can see him now,
[mocking jake]
Miley Stewart: hey miley what are you and Willis doing tomorrow night, hot date on the teater totter?
Oliver Oken: I guess he wanted to try it on them 1st.
Jake's Friend: Miley you won't believe what jake just told us...
Miley Stewart: Yeah so I went out with an 11 year old. But if you ask me he could totally pass for a 16 year old. Without the balloon hat.
Lilly Truscott: Or the ninja stickers
Miley Stewart: HEY!
Jake's Friend: We were just going to tell you this funny joke Jake told us. But you went out with an 11 year old is so much funnier!
Oliver Oken: Awkward!
[Miley stares at him]
Oliver Oken: I'm just gonna go see what that joke was.
Miley Stewart: And I'm gonna go talk to Jake

Lilly Truscott: You can't date a senior, he's old enough to...
Miley Stewart: Make Jake jealous?
Lilly Truscott: Oooh, diabolical. Or should i say guy-abolical?
[laughs]
Miley Stewart: You shouldn't say anything.

Oliver Oken: Why is Miley shoving a pretzel in that guys mouth?
Lilly Truscott: I think it's supposed to look romantic.

Miley Stewart: I guess I do deserve this. I did use Willis.
Lilly Truscott: Boy did you ever! It's like you had a love cold, and he was the tissue. Willis can I borrow you for a second.
Lilly Truscott: [Lilly pretends to blow her nose]
Lilly Truscott: Goodbye, Willis!
Lilly Truscott: [pretends to throw the tissue, and then wipes her hand on Miley's shirt]
Miley Stewart: I already admitted I was wrong! You don't have to blow my nose in it!

Jake Ryan: It's nice to see you again Hannah. Can't wait to get you back on set so we can finish our kiss. I'll have my people call your people!
Miley Stewart: Great! My people will be waiting!
Lilly Truscott: Which is me. Her most important people. I may look familar. But we've never met before. Not even at school or anything. Cause I'm home schooled, in Canada, where the Moose are.
Jake Ryan: O.K. Nice to meet you, too. Bye!
Miley Stewart: Bye, Jake. Where the Moose are. In Canada. Where I'm home schooled. Way to keep your cover, Lola.

Miley Stewart: Don't worry! I got him right where I want him!
Oliver Oken: Which is where?
Lilly Truscott: [Lily points her fingers at Miley as she walks by like she knows]
Lilly Truscott: I have no idea!

Miley Stewart: I'm alright!
Lilly Truscott: Well, I don't think Frankie will be when he finds out you broke his teeny head!
Miley Stewart: I'm sorry Teeny.
Lilly Truscott: It's okay.
[Miley kisses teeny award]

Willis: [Miley forces Willis' arm around her shoulder] Oh! I'm touching shoulder!
Mike: [runs] Willis, they're cutting the cake! It's shaped like a castle!
Willis: In a minute!
Mike: Well you better hurry if you want any of the pudding moat!
Willis: Pudding moat?
[throws arm off Miley, runs to cake]
Lilly Truscott: [turns to Oliver] Remember when you used to like cake more than girls?
Oliver Oken: Yeah. Ppuh. Kids.
Lilly Truscott: Why don't you go get some?
Oliver Oken: [runs] Maybe just a taste!

Lilly Truscott: You can't date a senior, he's old enough to...
Miley Stewart: ...make Jake jealous?
Lilly Truscott: Oooh, diabolical. Or should i say guy-abolical?
[laughs]
Miley Stewart: You shouldn't say anything.


"Hannah Montana: She's a Supersneak (#1.3)" (2006)
Jackson Stewart: Hey, isn't she that real estate lady? You know, the one on the bus bench in front of the library.
Lilly Truscott: Your dad's dating a homeless real estate lady? Whoaaa, that's weird. She sells houses, but she doesn't have one.
Jackson Stewart: I meant the ad on the bench, Miss Einstein.

Jackson Stewart: Hey, isn't she that real estate lady? You know, the one on the bus bench in front of the library.
Lilly Truscott: Your dad's dating a homeless real estate lady? Whoa, that's weird. She sells houses, but she doesn't have one.
Jackson Stewart: I meant the ad on the bench, Miss Einstein.

Miley Stewart: Lilly, my dad said no.
Lilly Truscott: ZZT! You think he said no, when really he said goooo. Noo, gooo. It's a mistake anybody could make, c'mon, let's go!

Lilly Truscott: Well in California, we do do that here.
Miley Stewart: [Jackson and Cooper snicker] What?
Jackson Stewart: You said do-do.
Miley Stewart: Grow up!

Lilly Truscott: [after Miley whipspers something in her ear] Okay, got it!
Oliver Oken: I didn't hear it. Got what?
Lilly Truscott: Milk! Shh. I'll tell you in the car.

Lilly Truscott: Oliver, you naive, simple boy... with a very good point!

Miley Stewart: [hiding from Robbie at the movie theater] I hate lying to him.
Lilly Truscott: You're on your hands and knees at a movie theater. The honesty ship has sailed!


"Hannah Montana: Cuffs Will Keep Us Together (#2.2)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [after learning Oliver has lost the key to their handcuffs] RUN.
Lilly Truscott: FAST.

Miley Stewart: Help me get ready and I'll let you keep any outfit you want
Lilly Truscott: What about shoes?
Miley Stewart: One pair
Lilly Truscott: Two
Miley Stewart: Nothin' Italian
Lilly Truscott: Fine

Miley Stewart: Well, he needs to help me, cause I won a Booty
Lilly Truscott: Good, cause you need one

Miley Stewart: You're going down phony doney.
Lilly Truscott: Who smells like week old bologne.
Miley Stewart: That's been in your locker all aloney.
Lilly Truscott: Right next to... to...
Miley Stewart: That melted ice-cream coney.
Lilly Truscott: Ooh girl you are in the zoney.

Miley Stewart: [Oliver is on his way to get the handcuff key] We're doomed.
Lilly Truscott: Why?
Miley Stewart: [points] His house is *that* way.

Miley Stewart: I won a Booty.
Lilly Truscott: Good. You could use one.
Miley Stewart: [gasps] How rude!


"Hannah Montana: I Can't Make You Love Hannah If You Don't (#1.4)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: So, how do you like Hannah Montana now?
Josh: She's still... okay.
Miley Stewart: Okay?
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, what do you want her to do? Surf the crowd?
Josh: Hey, that'd be cool.
Miley Stewart: Surf... the... crowd. Then I'll just have to go get another pretzel!

Miley Stewart: This is so frustrating! I spent all day yesterday trying to make Josh like Hannah Montana.
Oliver Oken: How'd it go?
Miley Stewart: It went really well! He loves Hannah Montana now and we're getting married! How do you think it went you donut?
Oliver Oken: I'm gonna guess not so well.
Lilly Truscott: Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner

Oliver Oken: It worked out! Who's the donut now?
Lilly Truscott: Still you!

Lilly Truscott: You're in California now, and we do do that here.
[Jackson and Copper snicker]
Miley Stewart: What?
Jackson Stewart: You said said 'do-do!'
Miley Stewart: Grow up

Lilly Truscott: Good Point! And besides, he probably doesn't even know your alive.
Lilly Truscott: You're like some dried up insect on the windshield of his life... not even in the center... your way off to the side where the wipers don't reach.
Lilly Truscott: [moves arms like windshield wipers] WEET, WEET, WEET, SPLAT, WEET, WEET ,WEET!

Miley Stewart: Lilly, I'm serious. How am I going to go out with a guy that doesn't like half of me?
Lilly Truscott: He doesn't know he doesn't like half of you... so just make him think half you he likes is all of you... as long as the other half keeps their mouth shut... the three of you should make a beautiful couple.
Oliver Oken: [confused look] I never get chick math.


"Hannah Montana: Mascot Love (#1.8)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Got any questions?
Lilly Truscott: A couple. First, What the hecky is a herkey? And second, if one of these is a pom-pom, does that make 2 of them pom-pom pom-poms? These are the questions that haunt me.

Lilly Truscott: You're going to ditch the Rolling Stones concert for me?
Miley Stewart: Please, those guys will still be touring when they're ninety!
Lilly Truscott: I thought they were ninety?

Lilly Truscott: Go Team! Throw The Ball! Go Team! To The Mall!

Miley Stewart: Come On! You can get this... we won't regret this... we'll be together... best friends together!
Lilly Truscott: When you cheer this way, I have to say ok... I know you must be right... but know i have
[looks at crowd]
Lilly Truscott: stagefright.

Lilly Truscott: [during tryouts] You may be good at football... you may be good at track... but when it come to basketball... you might as well step back.


Hannah Montana: The Movie (2009)
Lilly Truscott: [after being denied tickets to the Hannah Montana concert] You're the only popstar I know who can't get into her own concert.

Lilly Truscott: [after Miley crashes her party as Hannah] You will never ever make it up to me

Lilly Truscott: Ooh. I want a cowboy.

Hannah Montana: This is Lilly, my assistant.
Lilly Truscott: Executive assistant.

Hannah Montana: Don't you know better than to yell at someone who's asleep on top of a chicken coop?
Lilly Truscott: I Do now.


"Hannah Montana: Everybody Was Best Friend Fighting (#2.14)" (2007)
Guillermo Montoya: And who might your friends be?
Miley Stewart: Well, Gui, this is Lola Loftnagle. And this is...
Oliver Oken: [looks at microphone stand] Mikestand. Mike. Stand. Ley. Mike Standley. The third.
Lilly Truscott: And hopefully the last.

Miley Stewart: He thinks I'm a tiger.
Lilly Truscott: He thinks I'm colorful. That just leaves strange for you, Mikey.

Lilly Truscott: Hey Miley, I made you a cake.
Oliver Oken: Pathetic! Trying to butter her up with cake. Hey Miley, I made you a shirt!

Robbie Ray Stewart: What takes you girls so long?
Miley Stewart: Wig.
Lilly Truscott: Make-up.
Miley Stewart: Wardrobe.
Miley Stewart: [with Lola, showing their bracelets] Bling!
Miley Stewart: And then you hate it and you gotta start all over again.

Lilly Truscott: [Speaking simultaneously] She's taking me! Tell him!
Oliver Oken: She's taking me! Tell her!


"Hannah Montana: Me and Mr. Jonas and Mr. Jonas and Mr. Jonas (#2.16)" (2007)
Lily Truscott: Oh my gosh. You're dad's having a bro-mance.
Miley Stewart: Worse. He's having a Joe-Bro-Mance.

Lily Truscott: Relax. I'm sure he has a pet name for you, too.
Miley Stewart: Yeah.
[with disgust]
Miley Stewart: Miley.

Miley Stewart: [as Milo, a boy] Easy Otto.
Lily Truscott: [as Otis, a boy] aw-tis, oh-tis.

Lily Truscott: Robbie Ray hurt us
[pounds chest]
Lily Truscott: Hurt us deep...
Miley Stewart: Way deep, man.
[pounds stomach]
Miley Stewart: In the gut.
Kevin Jonas: And then he lies to us... how bogus is that?
Joe Jonas: I feel so used.
Nick Jonas: You?
[points to Joe]
Nick Jonas: I shared my nachos with that guy!

Nick Jonas: This is Joe, and Kevin, and I'm Nick.
Miley Stewart: We know who you are, your music ROCKS!
Lily Truscott: You're so hot!
Miley Stewart: On the charts.


"Hannah Montana: It's My Party and I'll Lie If I Want To (#1.5)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: Hello, Hannah Montana's close personal friend Lola here. Oh my gosh. Kelly. IT'S KELLY CLARKSON!
[calm]
Lilly Truscott: hello.
Miley Stewart: Lilly give me the phone!
Lilly Truscott: So, Kelly felly, sorry to here the party was canceled.
Miley Stewart: Lilly give me the PHONE!
Lilly Truscott: What do you mean? Hannah said...
Miley Stewart: Lilly! Don't listen to her! She doesn't like me. Professional jealousy. Petty, petty, girl

Miley Stewart: [Lilly is leaving after Miley lied to her] No! Lilly! Wait! You don't need them as your friends. You've got me.
Lilly Truscott: But if you were really my friend, you'd tell me the truth.
Miley Stewart: Ok.I'll come right out and say it. You spit food on people, You follow them into the bathroom,and, you walked around for about an hour, with a chocolate beard.
Lilly Truscott: Oh how embarrassing! Why am I such a dork! Why do I always do that!
[beats herself on the forehead]
Lilly Truscott: Lilly when are you ever gonna learn!
Miley Stewart: No! Lilly! Don't be so hard on yourself! I mean the first time I saw the choclate fountain, I poured about half of it into my PURSE!
Lilly Truscott: [hops around on the lumpy couch] Your just saying that to make me feel better.
[lifts up seat cushion]
Lilly Truscott: what the heck are all these newspapers?
Miley Stewart: I'll tell you what they are. They're me not being a good friend. I got caught leaving the party early, and I didn't want you to know.
Lilly Truscott: Why were you leaving early?
Miley Stewart: Because it was no fun without you there.
Lilly Truscott: Really?
Miley Stewart: [nods her head] And you know what? It's never gonna happen again.

Lilly Truscott: But the mall has cute clothes!
Miley Stewart: But the beach has cute boys.
Lilly Truscott: To the beach!

Lilly Truscott: What if it doesn't burn!


"Hannah Montana: My Boyfriend's Jackson and There's Gonna Be Trouble (#1.21)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [sitting reading magazine] boy! life sure can be wierd! who would have thought that miley would be dating jackson and... you'd be burping a sack of flower? OLIVER! the assignment is to raise a fake baby! you dont get extra credit for turning into Daddy McDork!

Sarah: So... how about that grade we got on the baby project?
Oliver Oken: Yeah... it's pretty great.
[long pause]
Sarah: Did you say something?
Oliver Oken: No.
Sarah: Oh, okay.
[long pause]
Oliver Oken: I'm just gonna go stretch my legs.
Sarah: Alright.
[walks over to Lily]
Oliver Oken: She's sufficating me!
Lilly Truscott: Sarah? The love of your life? The apple of your eye? The mother of your flour?
Oliver Oken: That's just it. Without the kid we have nothing to talk about.
Lilly Truscott: So, tell her how you feel and get it over with.
Oliver Oken: Lily, you don't understand, I mean... it would break her heart. I'm her Big Daddy Oken.
[Sarah taps him on the back]
Sarah: Big Daddy? I gotta be honest. Without the baby, we have nothing to talk about, you're boring and you use petroleum-based hair products. It's over.
[pause]
Sarah: Bye, Lily!

Sarah: There's my little cuddle-wuddles.
[shows Oliver with flour sack]
Sarah: Mommy got you some strained beats from a non-profit native american commune.
Oliver Oken: Awww. Yummy. You missed it Sarah, sweetheart.
[sits flour sack on table]
Oliver Oken: He just learned how to sit up on his own.
Sarah: Oh! Good for you!
[pinches the flour sack's "cheek"]
Sarah: It won't be long before you're all grown up and making alternative fuel out of raisins.
Lilly Truscott: So... that's what this is all about.
Oliver Oken: What?
Lilly Truscott: Nothing. It's just you, Sarah and your flower child make a very cute family.
Sarah: Thank you.
Oliver Oken: Oh, Lily. You kidder. We're just friends doing an assignment. Nothing more.
[walks away]
Oliver Oken: Don't blow this for me. I really like her.
Lilly Truscott: [laughing:] Since when?
Oliver Oken: Since she became the mother of my assignment. Look, I can't explain it, but the more time I spend with her, the more I like her.
Sarah: Oliver. I'm getting worried. I think he looks a little pale.
Lilly Truscott: Of course he's pale! He's bleached flour!
[Oliver gives Lily and horrified look]

Lilly Truscott: Oliver! You've got to get your board! The waves are incredible today.
[shows Sarah blowing raspberry on the flour sack]
Oliver Oken: How did I get so lucky?
Lilly Truscott: Everyone picked partners, and you were the only two left.
Sarah: Olikens? Where's the sunscreen? Now that they've destroyed the ozone layer, we have to protect little Ollie.
Oliver Oken: Coming, Sarah Boo.
[starts to walk over to Sarah, but Lily stops him]
Lilly Truscott: Olikens? Sarah Boo?
Oliver Oken: [voice breaking:] I know... my cup runneth over.
[goes over to Sarah and puts sunscreen on the flour sack]
Oliver Oken: Oh, there you go.
Sarah: Just think, one day, he could be a great humanitarion.
Lilly Truscott: Or a couple dozen cupcakes!
[Sarah and Oliver give Lily horrified looks]


"Hannah Montana: Oops! I Meddled Again (#1.11)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: The Important thing is you're still SMOKEN OKEN!
Lilly Truscott: You leave the ladies heart broken.
Miley and Lilly: And everybody knows that we're not just jokin'! A wiki-wiki what? and a wiki-wiki Bye! A wiki-wiki what? And a wiki-wiki bye!
Oliver Oken: You guys are right, When it rhymes, It Makes Sense! You made my life a wrecka so I'm dumping you Becca!
Miley and Lilly: You Made His Life A wrecka sohe's dumping you Becca!

Lilly Truscott: A Grilled Cheese Sandwich Would Have Picked That One Up!

Miley Stewart: And the important thing is that your still Smokin' Oken.
Lily Truscott: You leave the ladies heart broken.
Lily Truscott: A Wiki-Wiki hi,
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki bye.
Lily Truscott: A Wiki-Wiki hi,
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki bye.
Oliver Oken: When it rymes, it makes sense.You made my life a wreck-a so I'm dumping you, Becca. You made my life a wreck-a
Lily Truscott: so he's dumping YOU, Becca. A Wiki-Wiki hi...
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki, What the heck are you wearing?

Miley Stewart: This is gonna be Oliver's first girlfriend since kindergarten.
[holds back lughter and looks at Lilly]
Lilly Truscott: Look! I only held his hand because I wanted to borrow his crayons! It was the 64 pack, WITH THE SHARPENER!


"Hannah Montana: Joannie B. Goode (#2.28)" (2008)
Joannie: Hey I heard a thud... what happened?
Lilly Truscott: Oh... Jackson just took a dip in Lake Lugee.
Joannie: Sweet.

Joannie: Hey hey T-Cott!
Lilly Truscott: What's up P-Bo?
Lilly Truscott, Joannie: [do handshake] Sock it, lock it, put it in your pocket.
Oliver Oken: This is soo cool.

Miley Stewart: But I don't like your girlfriend.
Oliver Oken: That's okay, she doesn't like you either... and besides chances are one of us is gonna date someone the other two can't stand.
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, remember Josh.
Oliver Oken: Oh yeah and Trey... ugh...
Lilly Truscott: ugh... I know... and Jake...
Oliver Oken: Oh my gosh...
Miley Stewart: Ok I get it


"Hannah Montana: Oh Say, Can You Remember the Words? (#1.10)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: Beary the Bear? You couldn't do better then that?
Miley Stewart: I was 3 and I'm not changing his name now, that would just confuse him!

Miley Stewart: I had this horrible dream where I forgot the National Anthem in front of thousands of people.
Lilly Truscott: [laughs nervously] That wasn't a dream.
Miley Stewart: You couldn't play along for, like, a minute.

Miley Stewart: But what if I forget the words to one of MY songs? Or if I forgot to put my costume on. Then, I'd be singing in my underwear!
Lilly Truscott: That'd be quite a show.


"Hannah Montana: Ooh, Ooh, Itchy Woman (#1.9)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Actually, lets go to the beach.
Lilly Truscott: [getting yanked by Miley] But the mall has cute clothes!
Miley Stewart: But the beach has cute boys!

Miley Stewart: [trying to get the class excited about the camping trip] Come on, you guys. Think about it. Open fire, sleeping udner the stars, the animals. CAW CAW. CAW CAW. WHOOT. WHOOT. Ratttttcchchch ratcchhh.
Amber: Um, what are you supposed to be.
Miley Stewart: A chipmunk. Duh.
Amber: Could you be any weirder?
Miley Stewart: Well, I was going to do a pig but you already have that part covered.
Lilly Truscott: [Amber and Ashley give each other a "oh no she didn't" look] Ooh, what do I smell? Bacon that just got burned!

Amber: [Miley makes an owl noise, then a chipmunk noise] what are doing?
Miley Stewart: A chipmunk, duh.
Ashley Dewitt: Sorry but we don't speak hillbilly!
Amber: Or wash our clothes down yonder in the creek!
Miley Stewart: Well, I'd do the sound of a pig, but you two already know that one.
Lilly Truscott: [Lily sniffs around] I smell bacon that just got burned!


"Hannah Montana: Lilly's Mom Has Got It Goin' On (#2.19)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [both Miley and Lilly rush to their lockers, but Miley gets there first] You're blocking my locker.
Miley Stewart: You're blocking my locker.
Lilly Truscott: Why don't you show some
[in country accent]
Lilly Truscott: southern hospitality, and move.
Miley Stewart: Why don't you assert your independence and move me.
Oliver Oken: Ok, what are you two arguing about this time? Did somebody forget their friendship weekaversary?
Miley Stewart: We don't have weekaversaries anymore, because we are no longer friends and this would have been our 200th and Lilly would've gotten that charm bracelet she been wanting. Oh well!

Lilly Truscott: Well, I don't need presents from someone who insults my family.
Miley Stewart: [yelling] I insulted your family?
Lilly Truscott: Thanks for admiting it.
Miley Stewart: [yelling] I wasn't finished... YOUR CHECK GRABBING MOTHER!
Lilly Truscott: Your me-man-you-woman pappy!
Oliver Oken: You know what you two need? A vacation on the beautiful beaches of Okenland. Wear a bikini, get a free churro.

Lilly Truscott: [to Oliver] This isn't funny!
Miley Stewart: [to Oliver] This isn't funny!
Lilly Truscott: I said it first.
Miley Stewart: I can sing... ha!
[walks off]
Lilly Truscott: [mockingly] I can sing ha!
[walks off]


"Hannah Montana: Torn Between Two Hannahs (#1.17)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: [about Luanne] She seems nice.
Miley Stewart: Yeah, and a Venus Fly Trap seems like a pretty plant... until it throws you down a well.

Lilly Truscott: Next your gonna be saying "she sees dead people"!

Lilly Truscott: Throughout this party, you've been acting and talking like... OH MY GOSH,YOU'RE LUANNE!
Luann: What took you so long, Lulu?
Lilly Truscott: It's Lola!
Luann: Lilly, Lulu, Lola. Whatever.


"Hannah Montana: Money for Nothing, Guilt for Free (#1.19)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: This is going to be easier than finding a mullet in a Trucker's convention!
Oliver Oken, Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: Ya'll wouldn't last ten seconds in Tenesse.

Lilly Truscott: i'd bet she'd take a donation from a generous celiberty
Miley Stewart: i'd bet she would
Oliver Oken: yeah where we going to find one of those
[Miley and Lilly hit him with pillows at the same time]
Miley Stewart: you'd think he'd learn by now

Miley Stewart: Something ain't right here
[miley and lily come up from ball pit wearing each others wig]
Lilly Truscott: You look good in purple
Miley Stewart: Thank you
[they duck back under the balls]


"Hannah Montana: New Kid in School (#1.14)" (2006)
Jake Ryan: [speaking to the class] Even though I'm a TV superstar and was voted Teen Magazine's Hottie of the year...
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! I framed the cover!
Jake Ryan: Me too!
Lilly Truscott: I hung it up in my bathroom!
Jake Ryan: Me too!
Lilly Truscott: Oh my God! We have so much in common! We both love you!

Oliver Oken: I can't believe we're going to be THIS close to a famous person!
Miley Stewart: What am I? A grilled cheese sandwich?
Lilly Truscott: When you're Miley, you might as well be.

Miley Stewart: Lilly you dropped something.
Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: Your dignity.


"Hannah Montana: (We're So Sorry) Uncle Earl (#2.22)" (2008)
Uncle Earl: Remember when I was the hot one?
Lilly Truscott: He was the hot one?
Jackson Stewart: No, it's true, Uncle Earl was the prom king and dad had the unibrow.
Robbie Stewart: Sexiest unibrow in Bruford county.

Robbie Stewart: Why don't I just change the channel?
Oliver Oken: Hey I think "Are You Dumber Than a Dog" is on.
Lilly Truscott: Oh yeah, it'll be much more fun watching Oliver lose to the beagle again.
Oliver Oken: That dog was coached.

Lilly Truscott: [while carrying in box with Oliver] Hey, Uncle Earl... what's this?
Uncle Earl: Oh, that's Cuddle's twinkle box.
Lilly Truscott: Eww! Eww! Eww!
Oliver Oken: Oh, you are such a wimp.
Lilly Truscott: [lifts up tinkle box so it's pointing towards Oliver] Take it back! Take it back!
Oliver Oken: Ugh! It's getting on me... it's getting on me... ugh it's seeping through my clothes!


"Hannah Montana: When You Wish You Were the Star (#2.12)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: I wish we got an A on the project, what do you wish for?
Miley Stewart: Oh man, I wish... I wish there was no secret. It was just Hannah Montana all the time. It would sure make life a whole lot easier.

Lilly Truscott: Hannah, you rock! I can't believe you did three encores!... can't believe you did three encores.

Lilly Truscott: Eeeeeeeeeep!


"Hannah Montana: My Best Friend's Boyfriend (#2.7)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [to Miley] The only thing you showed me is that we are no longer friends! I'm leaving, and I'm takin' the shrimp!

Lucas: You're so cute, Lilypad.
Lilly Truscott: Not as cute as you, Lukey-Wukey.
Miley Stewart: I think I'm goin' to pukey-wukey.

Lilly Truscott: Well, you could've sat with us at lunch today.
Miley Stewart: I did sit with you at lunch today.


"Hannah Montana: It's a Mannequin's World (#1.7)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: This is awesome, the store even made a mannequin of me!
Lilly Truscott: That's not a mannequin, that's a Hanequin miss Montanaquin!
Miley Stewart: Oh No!
Lilly Truscott: What? That was cutequinn!
Miley Stewart: No, my dad's shopping for my birthday present.
Lilly Truscott: You're right! All that dress needs is a bonnet, and a sheep, and you're Little Bo Geek!
Miley Stewart: I love the man, but I don't think he should be allowed in the teen department with a credit card.

Lilly Truscott: Come on Miley. So it's a dorky sweater.
Miley Stewart: Are you kidding? I look like a kitty kebab!
[pulls tail]
Lilly Truscott: No one here's gonna make fun of you. It's not like someone is gonna take your picture and put it in the school yearbook.
Amber: Hey birthday girl.
[holding up phone]
Amber: Say cheese!
Miley Stewart: [to Lilly] Quick! Cover my tail!
[runs away]
Amber: [to Ashley] Did you get her?
Ashley Dewitt: No. You?
Amber: [annoyed] No, I took a picture of myself by mistake.
[looking at phone]
Amber: Ooh, and I look fantastic!
[laughs]


"Hannah Montana: Good Golly, Miss Dolly (#1.16)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: [to the camera about the principal's retirement] I can't believe you're retiring. You don't look a day over 80!
Oliver Oken: Lilly, he's only 65.
Lilly Truscott: Is he sick?
Oliver Oken: He will be after he sees this. Lets see what Dandruff Danny has to say.
Danny Dandruff: Let me do my hair!
Oliver Oken: This is going to take a while.
Lilly Truscott: [stepping in front o the camera] I didn't mean your old, you just remind me of my dead grandfather!
[nervously]
Lilly Truscott: But he didn't die from old age, he got hit by a school bus.
[very nervously]
Lilly Truscott: Ironic, huh?

Lilly Truscott: [On Olivers goodbye tape to Principal Fisher] We're gonna miss you Principal Fisher! I can't believe you're retiring! You don't look a day over 80!
Oliver Oken: Lilly, he's only 65.
Lilly Truscott: Really? Is he sick?
Oliver Oken: He will be when he sees this.
[Turns the camera to Dandruff Danny]
Oliver Oken: Let's see what Farewell words Dandruff Danny has for Principal Fisher.
Dandruff Danny: One second let me fix my hair!
Oliver Oken: This is gonna take a while.
Lilly Truscott: [Cuts in front of Dandruff Danny] Ugh,, I was just kidding about before sir. It's not that you're old,it's that you remind me of my dead grandfather. But he didn't die from old age. He got hit by a school bus. Ironic... isn't it?


"Hannah Montana: Get Down, Study-udy-udy (#2.4)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [Miley, Oliver, and Lilly approach Rico to ask him for help with biology] Oh Rico!
Rico: Hey bubblebrain! How's it going?
Miley Stewart: Aw; smart, funny, and...
Lilly Truscott: Dead-on about that bubblebrain!
[Miley gives her an evil look]
Lilly Truscott: ... But just in biology; other than that, you're as sharp as a tick!
Miley Stewart: That's "tack"!
Lilly Truscott: You see?
[Miley mocks Lilly]
Rico: Good thing you two are pretty.
Miley Stewart: Okay! I'm just gonna come right out and ask you...
Rico: You need help in biology.
Miley Stewart: How'd you know that?
Rico: Please! Put together the grades from your last four quizzes and they spell
[singing mockingly]
Rico: "Duh-Duh-Duh-F"!
Miley Stewart: One of those with a
[imitates Rico]
Miley Stewart: "Duh-Duh-Duh-Plus"!

Rico: [having seen Miley's "Bone Dance"] That song, those moves, your voice. It all reminds me of some famous singer.
Miley Stewart: Kelly Clarkson?
Lilly Truscott: Hillary Duff?
Oliver Oken: Jay-Z?
Rico: I got it. Hannah Montana!
[Miley, Lilly and Oliver all burst out laughing]


"Hannah Montana: You're So Vain, You Probably Think This Zit Is About You (#1.13)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: I know you're giving me a look; I just can't see it.

Miley Stewart: Looks don't matter.
Lilly Truscott: Easy for you to say. You're the poster child for perfect skin.
Miley Stewart: This isn't about me. Or my perfect skin.


"Hannah Montana: Smells Like Teen Sellout (#1.25)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: You don't look so good!
Hannah Montana: I've got a funny... Coming out of my tummy!
Lilly Truscott: Everybody clear!

Lilly Truscott: You should sell out more often!
Miley Stewart: I didn't sell out!
Lilly Truscott: Saying you love something that makes you yak?
Miley Stewart: Oh, please. Everyone exaggerates in commercials. Do you really think that football player's mom follows him around with a can of soup? I think not!


"Hannah Montana: Me and Rico Down by the School Yard (#2.1)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: Use your muscles Oliver.
Oliver Oken: They're in my backpack.

Miley Stewart: Okay, Rico, you know my secret. What's it going to take to shut you up?
Rico: You. As my girlfriend.
Miley Stewart: Say what?
Rico: Don't flatter yourself, doll face. This is strictly business. I need some hall cred in this place, and you can help me get it.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, so all he's looking for is a little arm candy.
Rico: That and someone to reach the top shelf of my locker.
Lilly Truscott: [to Miley] You can totally do that.
Miley Stewart: You can totally shut up!


"Hannah Montana: The Test of My Love (#2.27)" (2008)
Lilly Truscott: [talking about Orlando Bloom] and one day I'll be the Lilly Bloom.
Miley Stewart: Lilly Bloom?
Lilly Truscott: I know... how cool is that!

Miley Stewart: ;On her and trey's potential date; Tonight... Tonight's gonna be...
Lilly Truscott: PERFECT...
Trey Harris: Woah
Lilly Truscott: ...for you to go out because I your best friend, will be at a charity put-put golf tournament, filling in for another friend, a blonde one who sings alot
Miley Stewart: ;Interrupts Lilly; Uh, uh uh, too much information


"Hannah Montana: I Will Always Loathe You (#2.20)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [talking about Mamaw and Aunt Dolly's 30 year fight] So this whole feud started over a boy?
Miley Stewart: Yep. It was high-school. Mamaw was having a summer romance and then aunt dolly bounced in and, well that was pretty much all she had to do! Mamaw never forgave aunt dolly for stealing the love of her life. Mr Elvis Presley
Lilly Truscott: Noooo!
Miley Stewart: Yes!
Lilly Truscott: No!
Miley Stewart: Yes!
Lilly Truscott: No!
Jackson Stewart: [on the couch, trying to sleep] Yessss! Yes, yes, Elvis. Elvis with the pelvis and the hair and the hunka hunk of burning love. Guys I haven't slept all night and my back is killing me. So Please! For the love all that is good and pure in this forsaken universe, ZIP-IT!

Lilly Truscott: [entering with Popcorn] Jackson! I leave for two minutes and you switch to *wrestling*! Change it back to the Awards show!
Jackson Stewart: This *is* the Awards show!
[Lilly realizes Dolly and Nana are fighting on the awards show]
Lilly Truscott: Ooo. Now *that's* going to leave a mark! ... You're family is better than cable.
[Jackson nods]


"Hannah Montana: Don't Stop Til You Get the Phone (#2.17)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: Well, this does look pretty ridiculous. I mean, with your hair in rollers, your eyes bugging out, your "Miley" necklace flopping all over the place...
[realizes that this could blow Miley's secret]
Miley Stewart: [realizing it as well] Future-of-sleaze-journalism-say-what?

Lilly Truscott: I'm on the front page! Don't I look so cute when I'm scared?
Miley Stewart: If you don't get over yourself in about three seconds, you're gonna look absolutely *adorable*.


"Hannah Montana: I Want You to Want Me... to Go to Florida (#2.13)" (2007)
[talking about Hannah's new outfit]
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! What about the thing that you bought at the place next to the place that we went there one time?
Miley Stewart: No, that's too...
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, you're right. Plus, when you wear that you have to...
Miley Stewart: I know. And I hate those.
Lilly Truscott: Who doesn't?
Miley Stewart: What about the one I bought after the one I bought at the place next to the place?
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! The one that goes with the shoes with the things? I love that one.
Robbie Ray Stewart: Me, too!
Miley Stewart: Daddy, do you even know what we're talking about?
Robbie Ray Stewart: No, but as long as it doesn't cost me a wad of cash, I'm all for it.
Lilly Truscott: You're dad is...
Miley Stewart: I know!

Robby Ray Stewert: Lilly and I just watched the concert on TV you were terrific!
Lilly Truscott: And you blew Mikayla off the stage!
Robby Ray Stewert: The important thing is, honey, you did a great thing for charity.
Lilly Truscott: And you blew Mikayla off the stage!
Robby Ray Stewert: Yeah, I guess Hannah did show her a thing or two, and my daughter did the same for me. I'm proud of you, darlin'.
Lilly Truscott: And...
Robby Ray Stewert, Lilly Truscott: You blew Mikayla off the stage!


"Hannah Montana: The Wheel Near My Bed (Keeps on Turnin') (#3.29)" (2010)
Lilly Truscott: Hey, I just back from taking my mom to the airport... Awwww Did somebody get a boo-boo and need a hug from their daddy?


"Hannah Montana: You Gotta Not Fight for Your Right to Party (#2.6)" (2007)
Robbie Stewart: Why dont you read it, see how it sounds?
Lilly Truscott: "Dear Lilly and Oliver", Oh boy.
Robbie Stewart: Keep reading, it gets better
Lilly Truscott: "How dumb do ya'll think I am?
[pauses]
Lilly Truscott: "Love, Robbie Ray".
Lilly Truscott: I like the love part.


"Hannah Montana: Uptight (Oliver's All Right) (#3.24)" (2009)
Miley Stewart: Good night, nurse! Oliver is crushing on someone old enough to remember The Beatles!
Lilly Truscott: The who?
Miley Stewart: Them too.


"Hannah Montana: On the Road Again (#1.12)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: Mr. Stewart! You were incredible! What happened?
[nervously]
Lilly Truscott: I mean... why aren't you still performing?


"Hannah Montana: You Didn't Say It's Your Birthday (#2.24)" (2008)
Oliver Oken: [Lilly is hogging the chips] I paid for half of those!
Lilly Truscott: See, this is why you don't get dates... I'm a girl... be nice!
Oliver Oken: And this is why you don't get dates... you eat like a pig!
Lilly Truscott: You take that back!
[accidently spits on Oliver]
Oliver Oken: [wipes it off and wipes it on her shoulder] No, you take this back.
Lilly Truscott: Eww...


"Hannah Montana: The Idol Side of Me (#1.24)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: People will be downloading this for years!
Miley Stewart: She won't get hurt or anything, right?
Lilly Truscott: Just her pride... nation wide... no where to hide... humilifide... sat inside...
Miley Stewart: [taps Lily on the shoulde] Are you done?
Lilly Truscott: Just remember you go through red and she goes through the green.
Lilly Truscott: Cause shes mean... like an evil queen...
[Miley gives her the look]
Lilly Truscott: Now I'm done.


"Hannah Montana: Achey Jakey Heart: Part 1 (#2.9)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: Lilly! Why do you read that tabloid trash? They're nothing but lies.
Lilly Truscott: [clears throat] Hannah Montana looks fabulous...
Miley Stewart: With the occasional glimmer of truth.
Lilly Truscott: You didn't let me finish... Too bad she's really A GUY!
Miley Stewart: [grabs magazine] You have got to be kidding.
Lilly Truscott: I can't believe you didn't tell me. You slept over at my house! You borrowed my bras!
Miley Stewart: Hey, I look gooood in a mustache. Oh yeah, I would definitely date me.
Lilly Truscott: Me too.
Miley Stewart, Lilly Truscott: [they look at each other strangely] Awkward!


"Hannah Montana: Love That Lets Go (#4.7)" (2010)
Miley Stewart: I know it was wrong, but I knew you'd like riding Blue Jeans. And you did, up until the whole little boo-boo part.
Lilly Truscott: Come here, I'll boo-boo you!


"Hannah Montana: Schooly Bully (#1.23)" (2007)
Oliver Oken: I'll start writing your will.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, put me down for her shoes!
Miley Stewart: Ah, Fellowship of the wienies!


"Hannah Montana: Grandmas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Play Favorites (#1.6)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: waxy airplane earphones you're kidding right
Miley Stewart: with little gray hairs still stuck to them
Lilly Truscott: ugg!