Miley Stewart
Quicklinks
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
Filmographies
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Biographical
biography
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Miley Stewart (Character)
from "Hannah Montana" (2006)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"Hannah Montana: Lilly, Do You Want to Know a Secret? (#1.1)" (2006)
Johnny Collins: Hey Miley! What's Up?
Miley Stewart: [while putting ketchup on burger] Oh Nothing. Just getting some ketchup for my veggie burger. I see you like mayonnaise, I've never tried *that* on a veggie burger, maybe I should, but today cause I already have ketchup...
[looks down at massive amount of ketchup on burger]
Miley Stewart: You know what many people don't know... is that it's also a really good moisturizer her take some!

Miley Stewart: He is so cute!
Robbie Stewart: Honey at your age there's only two things that are cute: squirrels and puppy dogs.

Lilly Truscott: What size shoe do you wear?
Miley Stewart: I'm a five.
Lilly Truscott: I'm a six, but I'll squeeze!

Miley Stewart: I am so mad!
Robbie Stewart: So you're going to take it out on my ice cream sundae?

Miley Stewart: Next time try something with sleeves and deodorant
[plugs her nose]
Jackson Stewart: If you got it flaunt it!

Fairmaine: I love you Hannah Montana!
Jackson Stewart: Do you mind? I am on the phone here, all right? I've got a life too you know. And I would appreciate it if I could have one conversation without hearing the words Hannah Montana.
[on the phone]
Jackson Stewart: Yeah, that's right girl, I know Hannah Montana!
[Hannah/Miley rolls her eyes]
Jackson Stewart: And I got two incredible tickets for tomorrow night, great we'll see you then!
[hangs up phone and turns to Hannah/Miley]
Jackson Stewart: I need two incredible seats for tomorrow night!
Hannah Montama: Sorry, I'm sold out!
Jackson Stewart: Dad!
Robbie Stewart: Hey think about it this way Miley, he goes out with the girl, they fall in love, they get married and he moves out.
Hannah Montama: [tosses her jacket on the couch turns to Robbie and Jackson and points both index fingers at them] You've got the tickets
Miley Stewart: [phone rings] Hello?
Lilly Truscott: [yelling] Hey it's me, landing in twenty seconds!
Miley Stewart: Great!
Miley Stewart: Lilly alert in 18 seconds!
[takes off wig and jacket grabs another jacket and puts it on]
Jackson Stewart: She's your best friend Miley, sooner or later your gonna have to tell her your Hannah Montana.
Miley Stewart: I pick later!
Robbie Stewart: 9 seconds, get the juice!
Miley Stewart: Got it!
Robbie Stewart: Good!
Robbie Stewart: 3!
Jackson Stewart: [opens the door] 2!
Miley Stewart: 1!
Lilly Truscott: Guess who just landed two tickets to the hottest concert in town! Miley, you and I, I being your best friend, are going to see, the one, the only, Hannah Montana! Woo!
[Miley's eyes double in size]
Lilly Truscott: You're not screaming, why aren't you screaming?
Jackson Stewart: Oh believe me, she's screaming on the inside.
[Robbie wraps his arm around Jackson's mouth]
Jackson Stewart: [Miley screams in her head]

Lilly Truscott: [crawls on a rotating closet that Miley just showed her the opposite way] Cut me some slack Hannah!
Miley Stewart: Hannah? I knew this would happen!
Lilly Truscott: Did I say Hannah? I didn't mean that, it was a mistake!
Miley Stewart: No! The mistake was trusting you!
[Lilly stops crawling and the rotating closet carries her into the back]

Lilly Truscott: Ok, we didn't get those seats. Minor setback. but the good news is
[starts whispering]
Lilly Truscott: we have better seats for Hannah Montana!
Miley Stewart: I'm sorry, it's just that, I don't like Hannah Montana
[pulls her hair behind her head and starts eating]
Lilly Truscott: [leans down until her head is almost even with the table] What?
Oliver Oken: [walks in and starts talking to girls] Hey baby, how are you doing?... Oliver Oken, and may I say you two, are smokin'
Amber: In your dreams.
Oliver Oken: I'm countin' on that!
[walks past another girl]
Oliver Oken: Hey slick!... Hey! Oh yeah, she wants me.
Lilly Truscott: Oliver, you're not going to believe this! Miley says she "doesn't" like Hannah Montana!
Oliver Oken: What! Hannah Montana is a goddess! I worship at her feet!, in fact, FYI someday I'm gonna be Mr. Hannah Montana.
[Miley's eyebrows go halfway up her forehead]
Oliver Oken: I'm gonna watch her every minute of every day, and protect her from any obsessed fans, and every night I''m gonna shampoo and condition that beautiful "blonde" hair.
Miley Stewart: Oliver, I say this because I care about you, *get some help*!

Jackson Stewart: [Jackson enters wearing one of Hannah Montana's dresses] I'm not getting paid enough for this.
Miley Stewart: [Miley and Lily are both mortified as they look at Jackson] Neither am I.

Hannah Montana: Um, hey Amber, I think it's time to pluck the 'stache
Lilly Truscott: and Ashley...
[gasps]
Lilly Truscott: ...is that a zit or are you growing a new head!
Hannah Montana, Lilly Truscott: [they lean in and examine Amber and Ashley's faces] Eww!

Lilly Truscott: [after she sneaks into Hannah's Dressing room] Hannah Montana!
Hannah Montana: Whoever you are, you have to get out of here right now or I'll call security!
Lilly Truscott: Wait, wait no!, I'm sorry I was just looking for a souvenir, My name's Lilly Truscott and I'm a *huge* fan!
Lilly Truscott: [Hannah closes her eyes and stares at a pie, then shoves it in her face] Did you just shove pie in your face?
Hannah Montana: It's not a real pie. It's ummm. A foaming facial wash... Pie.

Lilly Truscott: Booger check!
Hannah Montana: Uhh, you are so... gross!

Hannah Montana: Hey, really soft hands.
Johnny Collins: [stuttering] Thanks. It's ketchup.

Hannah Montana: Hey, Jo-ust another fan
Johnny Collins: Hi. Um, could you sign this to Johnny. It's not me, it's my little brother. He really likes you, not that I don't! I do, but he wanted me to get it, so I'm getting it. So, if you could just sign that to Johnny. My little brother.
Hannah Montana: There ya go. Hey really soft hands.
Johnny Collins: Thanks it's ketchup. I- bye.
[runs away]

Lilly Truscott: [after Hannah's cell phone rings] Aren't you gonna get that?
Hannah Montana: No I'm talking to you that would be rude!

Jackson Stewart: Hey Hannah, I thought my little lady here could use a souvenir.
Hannah Montana: Jackson get out of here!
[throws a roll of toilet paper]
Jackson Stewart: For you. Told you we were tight.
[gives Miley/Hannah the evil eye]

Lilly Truscott: [Hannah stands behind the coat rack and moves clothes in front of her face so Lilly can't see her] I just wish Miley were here.
Hannah Montana: [talks fast] Uh, Miley, who's Miley, I don't know Miley, that's a strange name.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, she's my best friend.
Hannah Montana: [spreads clothes on coat rack and steps through it, then she runs to the door and opens it] Right! Well then, why don't you go get her.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, great idea, I'll call her
[takes out cell phone]
Hannah Montana: [closes door] No!
[walks up to her]
Hannah Montana: You know, cell phones don't really work in here, it has to do with the walls and the cement and...
[her cell phone starts ringing and she looks down at it]
Hannah Montana: OK, they must've fixed it.
Lilly Truscott: [Lilly's mouth opens] Aren't you gonna get that?
Hannah Montana: Uh, uh, uh, uh, No! I'm talking to you that would be rude.
[phone ring more]
Hannah Montana: Ok, she's not home
[closes Lilly's cell phone]
Lilly Truscott: Wow, that was weird!
Hannah Montana: [reaches for a pen and a picture] Uh, why don't I just give you an autograph for her.
Oliver Oken: What about me, I'm the one who loves you!
[Hannah closes her eyes]
Oliver Oken: [see's the pie on Hannah's face] Your much paler in person
Hannah Montana: Yeah, and you know what, gosh it was real fun meetin' you guys but I really gotta go.
Oliver Oken: Wait! Can't I shampoo and condition your beautiful blonde hair?
Hannah Montana: No! But you can take this towel.
[throws him the towel she wiped pie out of her eyes with]
Oliver Oken: Hannah Montana's towel!
[falls from window]
Oliver Oken: [crashing noises] Its ok, none of my blood got on the towel!
Lilly Truscott: Well, I guess I'm leaving too.
Hannah Montana: [motions her out the door] OK!
Lilly Truscott: Without even a towel as a souvenir.
Hannah Montana: [motions her out of the room again] Buh bye!
Lilly Truscott: Nothing but my memories, which will fade, too, too, quickly.
[turns back around]
Hannah Montana: All right all right! Here!
[hands her a scarf]
Lilly Truscott: Oh my gosh!
[puts scarf around her neck]
Lilly Truscott: The actual scarf you wore on the actual stage!
[Hannah grabs the autograph and hands it to her]
Lilly Truscott: I can't believe. Hey I have a lucky bracelet just like that! I loaned it to my best friend yesterday. Of course mine says Lilly on the back...
[looks at bottom of bracelet]
Lilly Truscott: Just like that.
[wipes pie off of Hannah's face]
Hannah Montana: Ta da!

Hannah Montana: [takes some toilet paper and wipes pie off her face] Lilly, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but you cannot just freeze me out like this, please talk to me.
Lilly Truscott: I thought we were friends, I thought we told each other everything. But I guess I was wrong, since you kept just about the biggest secret in the world! Miley Stewart slash Hannah Montana!

Hannah Montana: [to Jackson] Captain Hormone!

Hannah Montana: [as Jackson is about to sell her out] I'm surprised you can stand without a spine.


"Hannah Montana: Miley, Get Your Gum (#1.2)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but that friend didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. And there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Miley Stewart: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I mean, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, and I think Hannah and you could wind up being close friends someday.
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think.
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]

Miley Stewart: [to Lilly] When you talk do you hear it, or is it like a big roaring in your ears?

Miley Stewart: When you talk do you hear it, or is it just a big roaring in your ear?

Oliver Oken: No no! My love is bigger than my disgust... and your... black dripage.
Hannah Montana: Black dripage, watch this
[blows a huge licorice bubble]
Oliver Oken: Sacrifice sacrifice sacrifice
[get hit by burst licorice bubble in the face]
Oliver Oken: aah!
Hannah Montana: How do you like me now?
Oliver Oken: I still love you
Hannah Montana: What is it going to take, you and Hannah Montana will never be together
Oliver Oken: Why?
Miley Stewart: Because I'm Hannah Montana, me Miley
[pulls off Hannah wig]
Miley Stewart: [Oliver faints when he hear that] o.k. that worked well

Oliver Oken: Awwe Man, YOU LOVE ME!
Miley Stewart: Ewwwww, NO! I mean I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish. I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet, but I don't want to KISS you!

Miley Stewart: [Pulls Oliver and Lilly together] What about Lilly? You guys would be perfect together.
Lilly Truscott: Excuse me?
Miley Stewart: You're both stubborn
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: I am not!
Miley Stewart: Se, you always agree with each other.
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: No we don't!
Miley Stewart: I am *definitely* seeing a couple here.
Lilly Truscott, Oliver Oken: You're not because I'm not! Whoo!

Miley Stewart: [about gum chewing] Why? Does it bother you? It really turns off some people. They love me, but I disgust them!

Miley Stewart: Come on Oliver let's face it. The girl that you thought you loved is standing right beside you, and the truth is... you don't love her.

Miley Stewart: Either you have a great idea or you really have to go
Lilly Truscott: Oliver is about to get totally turned off by Hannah Montana and I really have to go
[runs off quickly]

Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. and there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Miley Stewart, Lilly Truscott: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, I think Hannah and you could wnd up being close friends
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]

Lilly Truscott: And here's the beauty part... If Oliver dies, you won't have to bury him in the backyard!
Miley Stewart: When you talk, do you hear it, or is it like a big roaring in your ears?

Miley Stewart: Anything?
Oliver Oken: No, in fact this is kinda awkward.

Miley Stewart: Either you have a great idea or you really have to
Lilly Truscott: Oliver is about to get totally turned off by Hannah Montana and I really have to go
[runs off quickly]

Lilly Truscott: Unless, maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way.
[Miley looks at Oliver who is rubbing the Hannah hand on his face]
Miley Stewart: Yes and maybe just maybe THAT'S INSANE!

Miley Stewart: What if one friend loved another friend, but didn't get loved back? Then things would get all weird and uncomfortable and the friends couldn't be friends anymore. and there's nothing more important then our friendship Oliver.
Oliver Oken: Oh man you love me!
Lilly Truscott, Miley Stewart: Eeww! No!
Miley Stewart: I mean, I do love you, but like a brother or a pet fish, I'd cry if I had to flush you down the toilet but I don't want to kiss you!
Oliver Oken: That's a relief, because, your my buddy, I think Hannah and you could wnd up being close friends
Lilly Truscott: Closer than you think
[Miley gives her a mean look]
Oliver Oken: Great! Once Hannah and I are together we'll have you over for some Su-shi Yeah!
[Miley holds up her index finger and starts hitting her head on a wall until Lilly stops her]

Hannah Montana: What? that's crazy, the only thing the same about Hannah Montana and me is... me... and me doesn't feel that way about him

Hannah Montana: [they all get in the limo] Thank you! I love you all!Thank you! Thank you!
[takes off her wig]
Hannah Montana: That was great! Oliver stared right into my eyes and never had a clue.
Lilly Truscott: [dressed up as Lola Luftnagle] Kinda like the look he has in spanish
Hannah Montana, Lilly Truscott: No comprendo!
Hannah Montana: I don't know what I was so worried about anyways
Lilly Truscott: Yeah
[opens the moon roof and Oliver pops through it]
Lilly Truscott: [They all scream, Hannah covers her face with the dog, Lilly/Lola puts Hannah's hat back on, and Robbie grabs the wig]
Robbie Stewart: Pull over driver!
Oliver Oken: Don't be scared, its me, Oliver Oken,
[Hannah puts her wig back on under cover of the dog]
Oliver Oken: wow, your even more beautiful upside down!
Lilly Truscott: Oh... Thank you! Your so sweet!
Hannah Montana: He was talking to me!
[to Oliver]
Hannah Montana: Look, you are very sweet,but, I have a boyfriend.
Oliver Oken: A boyfriend? Wait, I don't understand, then why'd you kiss me?
Hannah Montana: I didn't, the dog did.
[Holds Thor-the dog-up to Olivers face and Thor licks him]
Oliver Oken: Aww man! Those are the lips I've been thinking about for the past 24 hours!
Hannah Montana: [her wig gets turned around and Lilly pars the front so she can see out] I'm sorry,I was trying not to hurt your feelings,its just that, I'm just not interested,ok?
Oliver Oken: ok, I get it
Robbie Stewart: Now get down off the roof son before you dent it, this is a rental.
Oliver Oken: fine, I won't bother you anymore.
Lilly Truscott: [holds her hair in front of her face and Hannah pulls apart her hair so she can see Lola/Lily] If it helps, the dog hasn't stopped talking about you.
Oliver Oken: You must think I'm pathetic.
Hannah Montana: No, I think you sweet
[parts her hair so she can see]
Hannah Montana: and maybe if i didn't have a boyfriend...
Oliver Oken: I'd have a chance with you?
Hannah Montana: I never said that!
Oliver Oken: But you implied it!and thats good enough!I'll wait for you forever!
Hannah Montana: But I never said that!
Oliver Oken: Forever! Do you hear me Hannah Montana!Forever!

Hannah Montana: Oh, no. Its Oliver again! He snuck into my dressing room last week, nearly jumped on stage the week before, and just when you think he couldn't be any crazier, BAM! he kicks it up a notch.
Robbie Stewart: Look at those boney little elbows go! He cuttin' through the crowd like a weed-wacker!

Robbie Stewart: You know what that boy needs? A real girlfriend.
Hannah Montana: Dad,that is, the smartest thing you've ever said
Robbie Stewart: You know what they say, every now and then even a blind pig snorts up a truffle
Lilly Truscott: and that is the wierdest
[Hannah/Miley nodds]


"Hannah Montana: People Who Use People (#1.18)" (2006)
Jake Ryan: So who's your friend?
Miley Stewart: Oh. That's Willis. He's from Seattle. You know, the coffee capital of America. He drinks it... black.
Jake Ryan: Holly drinks espresso.
Miley Stewart: Willis shaves.
Jake Ryan: Holly waxes.
Miley Stewart: Willis is a SENIOR!
Jake Ryan: Uh... wow.

Miley Stewart: Oh, Hey Jake! I didn't notice you were on the beach.
Jake Ryan: Oh, Hey Miley. I didn't notice you here on the beach. This is Holly. She's an actress.
Miley Stewart: Oh yeah! I saw you in that commercial. You know, the one where you had to have that really uncomfterable talk with your mom. I hope everything worked out.
Holly: That wasn't really my mom, okay?
Miley Stewart: Well, as long as the foot fungus is gone.
Jake Ryan: So, who's your friend?
Miley Stewart: Oh, that's Willis. He just moved here from Seattle, you know, the coffee capital of the U.S? He drinks it, black.
Jake Ryan: Holly drinks espresso.
Miley Stewart: Willis shaves.
Jake Ryan: Holly waxes.
Miley Stewart: Willis is a senior!
Jake Ryan: [pauses] Wow.
Miley Stewart: [smiles] Toodles!

Jake Ryan: Who's your friend?
Miley Stewart: Oh, that's Willis. He's from Seattle. You know the coffee capital. Hedrinks his B-LACK!
Jake Ryan: Holly drinks expresso.
Miley Stewart: Willis shaves.
Jake Ryan: Holly waxes.
Miley Stewart: Willis is a SENIOR!
Jake Ryan: WOW
Miley Stewart: Toodles.
Jake Ryan: Oh Holly open up!
[throws popcorn in her mouth]
Miley Stewart: Oh Willis, are you hungry?
[shoves pretzel in his mouth]

Miley Stewart: Just look for cool, older guys.
Willis: Hey Miley!
Miley Stewart: Hey Willis! Who's your friend?
Willis: Oh! This is my best friend Mike! Mike this is the girl I was telling you about. What do you think?
Mike: Hubba Hubba!
[sprays Miley with silly string]
Miley Stewart: How old is he?
Willis: I know, I know. He looks 10 but he's really 12.
Lilly Truscott: Isn't weird to hang out with people younger than you?
Willis: Well, truth is, Mike's older than me.
Oliver Oken: How old are you?
Willis: I'm 11, and 3/4.
Miley Stewart: You're 11.
Willis: And 3/4.
Miley Stewart: Watchu talkin bout Willis?
Miley Stewart: How can you be 11?
Lilly Truscott: And 3/4
Miley Stewart: NOT HELPING!
Miley Stewart: And take that giraffe off of your head.
Willis: UHHHH! It's a dragon!
Miley Stewart: Whatever, it's a balloon hat.
Oliver Oken: Look at the brightside she can babysit him for extra money.
Miley Stewart: You said you were graduating.
Willis: I AM!
Miley Stewart: Elementary school.
Willis: Sorry! I just wanted to see what it would feel like being at a party with you know an older babe.

Lilly Truscott: Miley you either confront him now or later?
Miley Stewart: I pick later.
[turns around to leave, they turn her back around]
Miley Stewart: I can see him now,
[mocking jake]
Miley Stewart: hey miley what are you and Willis doing tomorrow night, hot date on the teater totter?
Oliver Oken: I guess he wanted to try it on them 1st.
Jake's Friend: Miley you won't believe what jake just told us...
Miley Stewart: Yeah so I went out with an 11 year old. But if you ask me he could totally pass for a 16 year old. Without the balloon hat.
Lilly Truscott: Or the ninja stickers
Miley Stewart: HEY!
Jake's Friend: We were just going to tell you this funny joke Jake told us. But you went out with an 11 year old is so much funnier!
Oliver Oken: Awkward!
[Miley stares at him]
Oliver Oken: I'm just gonna go see what that joke was.
Miley Stewart: And I'm gonna go talk to Jake

Jake Ryan: This is Holly. She's an actress.
Miley Stewart: Oh yeah. I saw you in that commercial, you know the one where you had to have that really uncomfortable talk with your mom. How did that work out?
Holly: That wasn't really my mom. OK.
Miley Stewart: Well... as long as the toe fungus is gone.

Lilly Truscott: You can't date a senior, he's old enough to...
Miley Stewart: Make Jake jealous?
Lilly Truscott: Oooh, diabolical. Or should i say guy-abolical?
[laughs]
Miley Stewart: You shouldn't say anything.

Miley Stewart: Who sprinkled drama queen in your oatmeal this morning?

Miley Stewart: You said you were graduating!
Willis: I am!
Miley Stewart: Elementary school!

Miley Stewart: Admit it Jake. You like me.
Jake Ryan: So. You like me. Just say it.
Miley Stewart: No you say it.
Jake Ryan: No you.
Miley Stewart: No you.
Miley Stewart: [they kiss]
Miley Stewart: [smiles]

Miley Stewart: So, I guess this kinda means we're together.
Jake Ryan: I guess it does.
Miley Stewart: So. Do you wanna go out some time, or do you wanna ask me since your the guy?
Jake Ryan: Well, I don't really know how to say it.
Miley Stewart: Come on it's not that hard.
Jake Ryan: Well ok. Do you want to go out with me, four months from this Saturday?
Miley Stewart: Yeah. That sounds- HUH?
Jake Ryan: Well. Frankie Munez was going to do this movie, but he dropped out. I fly to Romania tonight!
Miley Stewart: Yeah, but ya' can't just leave. Ya' kissed me!
Jake Ryan: Well hey! It's not my fault I got a big part in a movie!
Miley Stewart: I know but, YA KISSED ME!
Jake Ryan: I know, and it was great, and now I don't have to go off for four months and wonder what it would have been like!
Miley Stewart: Yeah. It would have been awful for you to have left without plantin' one on me!
Jake Ryan: Exactly!
Miley Stewart: So, I guess it is four months, so I'm gonna give you a little something extra to remember me by.
Miley Stewart: [leans in to kiss Jake and they both close their eyes. Miley opens her eyes and pushes him off of the rail]
Jake Ryan: WOAH!
Miley Stewart: Tat's how I plant one.

Miley Stewart: I guess I do deserve this. I did use Willis.
Lilly Truscott: Boy did you ever! It's like you had a love cold, and he was the tissue. Willis can I borrow you for a second.
Lilly Truscott: [Lilly pretends to blow her nose]
Lilly Truscott: Goodbye, Willis!
Lilly Truscott: [pretends to throw the tissue, and then wipes her hand on Miley's shirt]
Miley Stewart: I already admitted I was wrong! You don't have to blow my nose in it!

Jake Ryan: It's nice to see you again Hannah. Can't wait to get you back on set so we can finish our kiss. I'll have my people call your people!
Miley Stewart: Great! My people will be waiting!
Lilly Truscott: Which is me. Her most important people. I may look familar. But we've never met before. Not even at school or anything. Cause I'm home schooled, in Canada, where the Moose are.
Jake Ryan: O.K. Nice to meet you, too. Bye!
Miley Stewart: Bye, Jake. Where the Moose are. In Canada. Where I'm home schooled. Way to keep your cover, Lola.

Miley Stewart: Don't worry! I got him right where I want him!
Oliver Oken: Which is where?
Lilly Truscott: [Lily points her fingers at Miley as she walks by like she knows]
Lilly Truscott: I have no idea!

Willis: I'm eleven, and three-quarters.
Miley Stewart: How can you be eleven?
Oliver Oken: Look on the brightside, she can babysit him for extra money.

Miley Stewart: I'm alright!
Lilly Truscott: Well, I don't think Frankie will be when he finds out you broke his teeny head!
Miley Stewart: I'm sorry Teeny.
Lilly Truscott: It's okay.
[Miley kisses teeny award]

Willis: [to Miley] Hey! I was wondering if maybe you want to go to this... bowling party with me.
Miley Stewart: Sure! Of course I'll go to the bowling party with you
[speaks louder, directed towards Jake]
Miley Stewart: with all of your senior classmates!

Lilly Truscott: You can't date a senior, he's old enough to...
Miley Stewart: ...make Jake jealous?
Lilly Truscott: Oooh, diabolical. Or should i say guy-abolical?
[laughs]
Miley Stewart: You shouldn't say anything.

Miley Stewart: Ok Whats up Jake? why haven't you told anyone about me an balloon boy?
Jake Ryan: Why would I do that? You seemed so miserable and I didn't want to make it any worse.
Miley Stewart: Really, thats kinda nice.
Jake Ryan: It's like I've been telling you all along, im really not a bad guy.
Miley Stewart: Maybe not.
Jake Ryan: Plus I thought it was kinda cool that you went thriugh all that trouble just to make me jealous.
[Walks off]
Miley Stewart: [Catches up to him] wowhoho. Slow down there eagle boy. Why would I be trying to make you jealous, besides you have a girlfriend.
Jake Ryan: Holly, shes not my girlfriend. We have a movie coming out so we were hanging out, its a publicity thing.
Miley Stewart: Why didn't you tell me that before?
Jake Ryan: Uh, Well I, I, I, think I...
Miley Stewart: [Cuts him off] Wait a minute I know why, because you were trying to make me jealous.
Jake Ryan: Was not.
Miley Stewart: Was too, admit it Jake you like me!
Jake Ryan: No, you like me just say it!
Miley Stewart: No you say it!
Jake Ryan: No You!
Miley Stewart: No You!
[He goes in and Kisses her. Lily who is watching all of this eating popcorn on a chair falls over spilling all of it]


Hannah Montana: The Movie (2009)
Tyra Banks: Do you know who I am?
Hannah Montana: Well, I know you know who I am.

Store Manager: Tyra Banks. Thats our only pair
Tyra Banks: Thats not funny. Do you know who i am?
Hannah Montana: Well i know you know who I am

Hannah Montana: In my defense, I totally saw those shoes first.

Vita: I can get her a private jet if she wants.
Hannah Montana: Yes! Ive always wanted one of those!

Hannah Montana: Maybe i should of remembered Grandma's birthday.
Jackson Stewart: I did.

Travis Brody: This is usually about the time someone would say thank you.
Hannah Montana: I was getting there.

Hannah Montana: [after getting eggs from the chicken coop] Y'all couldn't wait?

Hannah Montana: She likes you, you like her, why do you have to make it so complicated?

Hannah Montana: [after the locals suggest bringing Hannah Montana to Crowley Crows for a concert] Um i guess i could give her a call

Hannah Montana: This is Lilly, my assistant.
Lilly Truscott: Executive assistant.

Travis Brody: So you and Miley are pretty close?
Hannah Montana: You have no idea.

Hannah Montana: [after changing from Hannah to Miley for Travis to ask her out, running up the stairs past Ruby] Got to go. Got to go. Got to go.

Hannah Montana: [Knocking heads with Jackson under the table at the dinner with the Mayor] Trying to have my first mature relationship, now get back up there!

Hannah Montana: Don't you know better than to yell at someone who's asleep on top of a chicken coop?
Lilly Truscott: I Do now.

Hannah Montana: [as Miley Stewart] Caterpillar in the tree.
Hannah Montana: How you wonder who you'll be,
Hannah Montana: can't go far but you can always dream.
Hannah Montana: Wish you may and wish you might,
Hannah Montana: don't you worry,
Hannah Montana: hold on tight.
Hannah Montana: I promise you there will come a day.
Hannah Montana: Butterfly, fly away.

Hannah Montana: The last time I was on this stage i was 6, I was... Miley. And I still am.

Robby Ray Stewart: You got in a shoe fight!
Hannah Montana: Daddy, don't do this.
Robby Ray Stewart: I Think we're done.
Hannah Montana: So you're saying I can never be Hannah again?
Robby Ray Stewart: Ask me in 2 weeks.

Hannah Montana: [after Travis sees Miley take off her Hannah wig] Travis, please let me explain!
Travis Brody: Explain what? How you were makin fun of me? Laughin at me? Lyin to me this whole time. I was honest with you. I told you how I felt.
Hannah Montana: [about to cry] And I feel the same way.
Travis Brody: No you don't. Cause I would've never treated you like that. You know what... Miley? Hannah? Whoever you are... We're done.
Hannah Montana: [crying] Travis! Travis please.


"Hannah Montana: More Than a Zombie to Me (#1.15)" (2006)
Lilly Truscott: Ah, man, you made me miss his muscles... his zombie slaying muscles.
Miley Stewart: Lilly build a bridge and get over it.

Jake Ryan: Miley you seemed nervous when asked you to the dance at school which is to be expected cause look at me.
Lilly Truscott: I do, all the time even when you don't know it.
Lilly Truscott: Did I just say that out loud?
Miley Stewart: yes!

[telling Lilly about her new-found crush on Jake]
Miley Stewart: Well, you would've known last night if you had your cell phone... photosynthesis! I mean, come on!

Miley Stewart: Oh no! This is horrible! Not only do I have to kiss him, but my lips fall off!
Lilly Truscott: No it's okay see, he reattaches them with his love.
Lilly Truscott: Awww!
Miley Stewart: EWWWWW!

Lilly Truscott: Since when do you like Jake?
Miley Stewart: Since he saved me from going to the Portal of the Underworld. Those kinds of things make you realize what's important in life

Lilly Truscott: What are you doing? Your supposed to be at a 70's dance! Not turning letters on a game show!
Miley Stewart: OH MY GOD! I completley forgot! I hope i don't stand out!

Jake Ryan: So Hannah, what do you think of the script?
Miley Stewart: Well, love everythang... except for page 41.

Miley Stewart: Lilly, I am trying to tell you something!
Lilly Truscott: What? That your pants are too tight?

Lilly Truscott: Hmmm. Over the ears or behind the ears. Oh! One over and one behind! Oh, yeah! I'm good!
Miley Stewart: Ugh!
Lilly Truscott: Hey! My ears aren't that bad!
Miley Stewart: UGH!
Lilly Truscott: Ok, no ears.
Miley Stewart: Hello? I'm trying to tell you something Lilly!
Lilly Truscott: What? Your pants are on too tight?
Miley Stewart: No, guess which pop teen singer is getting a role in "Zombie High"
Lilly Truscott: Paula Abdul!
Miley Stewart: No, Hannah Montana.
Lilly Truscott: Are you serious! Wait, you don't know how to act.
Miley Stewart: Yes I do! I act like all of Oliver's jokes are funny. I act like I'm not Hannah Montana. And I acted like I liked that sweater that you wore yesterday.
Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: I loved it, I was acting. Or was I?
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! You are good!

Jake Ryan: So Miley. Will you go to the seventies dance with me?
[girls gasp]
Miley Stewart: Yes
Group of Girls: No!
Miley Stewart: I mean no!
Group of Girls: Yay!
Jake Ryan: No?
Miley Stewart: Yes I mean no!
Group of Girls: Huh?
Miley Stewart: Now you cheer.
Group of Girls: Yay!

Lilly Truscott: So... what are you saying?
Miley Stewart: Gives Lily a weird look
Lilly Truscott: That I'm the canned fruit cup you get when they're all out of the chocolate pudding!

Lilly Truscott: So, what are you saying? That I'm the canned fruit cup you get when they're all out of the chocolate pudding.
Miley Stewart: What?
Lilly Truscott: You know what I mean. Well I've got news for you. The Jake ship has sailed... And you're not on it... I'm in a first class cabin.
Miley Stewart: Just leave mad already.
Lilly Truscott: Happily.
[both walk off in opposite directions, then come back]
Miley Stewart: My house is this way.
Lilly Truscott: My house is that way.


"Hannah Montana: Everybody Was Best Friend Fighting (#2.14)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [talking to Rico after he offers her a free ticket] Teeny Meanie Weenie say what?

Guillermo Montoya: I thought you put the tennis in Tennessee...
Miley Stewart: Yea and I kinda just left it there.

Miley Stewart: [after overhearing Guillermo's angry phone conversation] Is anything wrong?
Guillermo Montoya: My partner for the celebrity tennis tournament sprained her thumb. Speed-texting.

Miley Stewart: [to Lily and Oliver after their loud arguments] Sounds like you guys are having a great time. You wanna know how I know? 'Cause I can hear y'all from over there!

Miley Stewart: [looking At Oliver's Disguise] What is that, armpit hair?
Oliver Oken: [to Lilly] I thought you said no one could tell!

Guillermo Montoya: And who might your friends be?
Miley Stewart: Well, Gui, this is Lola Loftnagle. And this is...
Oliver Oken: [looks at microphone stand] Mikestand. Mike. Stand. Ley. Mike Standley. The third.
Lilly Truscott: And hopefully the last.

Miley Stewart: He thinks I'm a tiger.
Lilly Truscott: He thinks I'm colorful. That just leaves strange for you, Mikey.

Miley Stewart: If you say freaky freaky fun, you're going home.

Robbie Ray Stewart: What takes you girls so long?
Miley Stewart: Wig.
Lilly Truscott: Make-up.
Miley Stewart: Wardrobe.
Miley Stewart: [with Lola, showing their bracelets] Bling!
Miley Stewart: And then you hate it and you gotta start all over again.

Miley Stewart: Teeny Weeny Meany say what?


"Hannah Montana: Oh Say, Can You Remember the Words? (#1.10)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Look! I'm a cup fly!

Lilly Truscott: Beary the Bear? You couldn't do better then that?
Miley Stewart: I was 3 and I'm not changing his name now, that would just confuse him!

Miley Stewart: Miles, iceberg right behind you.
Miley Stewart: Oliver! I was just...
Oliver Oken: Bailing on me?
Miley Stewart: No, I was only thinking about bailing on you, it's different!
Oliver Oken: You said I was the Titanic!
Miley Stewart: No, not the ship! The very successful movie! You made like a billion dollars!
[to her father]
Miley Stewart: All right, daddy. we need to work on a new warning signal!

[after being busted by Oliver]
Miley Stewart: We need to work on a new warning signal!
Robbie Stewart: I did everything but baste you with barbecue sauce.

Miley Stewart: I had this horrible dream where I forgot the National Anthem in front of thousands of people.
Lilly Truscott: [laughs nervously] That wasn't a dream.
Miley Stewart: You couldn't play along for, like, a minute.

Miley Stewart: O say can you see. By the dawn's early light. Through yonder window breaks.
[abruptly stops and stares embarrassingly]

Robbie Stewart: Mile, listen. If you wanna put this thing behind you, you gotta get back on the horse, just like Uncle Earl.
Miley Stewart: Uncle Earl forgot the words to the national anthem?
Robbie Stewart: No, Uncle Earl fell off a horse. Took four of us to get that fat old coop back up.

Miley Stewart: But what if I forget the words to one of MY songs? Or if I forgot to put my costume on. Then, I'd be singing in my underwear!
Lilly Truscott: That'd be quite a show.

Oliver Oken: [before Shakespeare play] I don't think I can do this.
Miley Stewart: Come on Oliver you gotta stay positive.
Oliver Oken: Okay.
[pause]
Oliver Oken: I'm positive I can't do this.


"Hannah Montana: Cuffs Will Keep Us Together (#2.2)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [after learning Oliver has lost the key to their handcuffs] RUN.
Lilly Truscott: FAST.

Miley Stewart: [about an award] This is my true dream, to be on live T.V. and hold my own Booty

Miley Stewart: Help me get ready and I'll let you keep any outfit you want
Lilly Truscott: What about shoes?
Miley Stewart: One pair
Lilly Truscott: Two
Miley Stewart: Nothin' Italian
Lilly Truscott: Fine

Miley Stewart: Well, he needs to help me, cause I won a Booty
Lilly Truscott: Good, cause you need one

Miley Stewart: You're going down phony doney.
Lilly Truscott: Who smells like week old bologne.
Miley Stewart: That's been in your locker all aloney.
Lilly Truscott: Right next to... to...
Miley Stewart: That melted ice-cream coney.
Lilly Truscott: Ooh girl you are in the zoney.

Oliver Oken: [key breaks in hand cuffs] Uh Oh!
Miley Stewart: I hate when he says uh oh!
Robbie Stewart: Yeah, it's almost as bad as when he thinks!

Miley Stewart: [Lily enters] Well look who showed up. Were all of the other concerts in town sold out? Cause I know you wouldn't pick mine first, or second, or LAST!

Miley Stewart: [Oliver is on his way to get the handcuff key] We're doomed.
Lilly Truscott: Why?
Miley Stewart: [points] His house is *that* way.

Miley Stewart: I won a Booty.
Lilly Truscott: Good. You could use one.
Miley Stewart: [gasps] How rude!


"Hannah Montana: Me and Mr. Jonas and Mr. Jonas and Mr. Jonas (#2.16)" (2007)
Lily Truscott: Oh my gosh. You're dad's having a bro-mance.
Miley Stewart: Worse. He's having a Joe-Bro-Mance.

Lily Truscott: Relax. I'm sure he has a pet name for you, too.
Miley Stewart: Yeah.
[with disgust]
Miley Stewart: Miley.

Robby Ray Stewart: [after the Jonas Brothers ask him to write them a song] I'd love to!
Miley Stewart: Song-writing daddy say WHAT?

Miley Stewart: [as Milo, a boy] Easy Otto.
Lily Truscott: [as Otis, a boy] aw-tis, oh-tis.

Lily Truscott: Robbie Ray hurt us
[pounds chest]
Lily Truscott: Hurt us deep...
Miley Stewart: Way deep, man.
[pounds stomach]
Miley Stewart: In the gut.
Kevin Jonas: And then he lies to us... how bogus is that?
Joe Jonas: I feel so used.
Nick Jonas: You?
[points to Joe]
Nick Jonas: I shared my nachos with that guy!

Miley Stewart: Duck and hide daddy, it's the return of the Joni.

Nick Jonas: This is Joe, and Kevin, and I'm Nick.
Miley Stewart: We know who you are, your music ROCKS!
Lily Truscott: You're so hot!
Miley Stewart: On the charts.

Nick Jonas: [after Hannah and Robby burst into the recording room] Dudes... it's Hannah Montana!
Kevin Jonas: [Nick, Joe and Kevin scramble to the door, trying to get through first; Kevin steps forward] We're such big fans!
Joe Jonas: [Joe steps forward to join Kevin] We love your music!
Nick Jonas: [Nick steps forward, too] You're pretty.
[Kevin hits him over the head]
Nick Jonas: Uh, pretty good at the singing and dancing that you do. Wow, you're pretty.
Kevin Jonas: [looks at Nick] Nice save.
[looks back at Hannah, holding out his hand]
Kevin Jonas: I'm Kevin.
Miley Stewart: [shakes Kevin's hand] The cute, romantic one.
[shakes Joe's hand]
Miley Stewart: And you're Joe, the cute, funny one.
[shakes Nick's hand]
Miley Stewart: And you're Nick, the cute, sensitive one.
Robby Ray Stewart: [breaks handshake] And I'm her daddy, the cute, protective one.

Joe Jonas: You're Robbie Ray.
[to Kevin]
Joe Jonas: He writes all the songs.
Kevin Jonas: I know! "Nobody's Perfect" is genius.
Robby Ray Stewart: I like the cute, romantic one.
Joe Jonas: I love how it starts off soft, and then BAM! Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days...
[Kevin and Nick join in]
Joe Jonas, Kevin Jonas, Nick Jonas: Everybody knows what, what I'm talkin' 'bout, everybody gets that way!
Robby Ray Stewart: I was wrong. I like 'em all.
Miley Stewart: Step aside, cowboy, I saw 'em first.


"Hannah Montana: Oops! I Meddled Again (#1.11)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: [has to parasail in a chicken suit] You are one evil little boy.
Rico: No time for flattery.

Oliver Oken: [about to walk into the cafeteria] Wait, I forgot something.
Miley Stewart: What?
Oliver Oken: My name!
Miley Stewart: It rhymes with trolley.
Oliver Oken: Oh I need more than that!

Miley Stewart: [has to parasail in a chicken suit] You are one evil little boy.
Rico: Too late for flattery.

Becca Weller: But why were you in my gym locker?
Miley Stewart: [in a chicked costume] Cause I'm a baaaaad chicken!

Miley Stewart: The Important thing is you're still SMOKEN OKEN!
Lilly Truscott: You leave the ladies heart broken.
Miley and Lilly: And everybody knows that we're not just jokin'! A wiki-wiki what? and a wiki-wiki Bye! A wiki-wiki what? And a wiki-wiki bye!
Oliver Oken: You guys are right, When it rhymes, It Makes Sense! You made my life a wrecka so I'm dumping you Becca!
Miley and Lilly: You Made His Life A wrecka sohe's dumping you Becca!

Miley Stewart: I don't read minds... I read... you're PDA. That I stole from your gym locker.
Becca Weller: Why would you do that?
Miley Stewart: 'Cause i'm a BAAAD chicken!

Miley Stewart: And the important thing is that your still Smokin' Oken.
Lily Truscott: You leave the ladies heart broken.
Lily Truscott: A Wiki-Wiki hi,
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki bye.
Lily Truscott: A Wiki-Wiki hi,
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki bye.
Oliver Oken: When it rymes, it makes sense.You made my life a wreck-a so I'm dumping you, Becca. You made my life a wreck-a
Lily Truscott: so he's dumping YOU, Becca. A Wiki-Wiki hi...
Miley Stewart: And a Wiki-Wiki, What the heck are you wearing?

Miley Stewart: This is gonna be Oliver's first girlfriend since kindergarten.
[holds back lughter and looks at Lilly]
Lilly Truscott: Look! I only held his hand because I wanted to borrow his crayons! It was the 64 pack, WITH THE SHARPENER!


"Hannah Montana: I Can't Make You Love Hannah If You Don't (#1.4)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: So, how do you like Hannah Montana now?
Josh: She's still... okay.
Miley Stewart: Okay?
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, what do you want her to do? Surf the crowd?
Josh: Hey, that'd be cool.
Miley Stewart: Surf... the... crowd. Then I'll just have to go get another pretzel!

Miley Stewart: This is so frustrating! I spent all day yesterday trying to make Josh like Hannah Montana.
Oliver Oken: How'd it go?
Miley Stewart: It went really well! He loves Hannah Montana now and we're getting married! How do you think it went you donut?
Oliver Oken: I'm gonna guess not so well.
Lilly Truscott: Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner

Oliver Oken: So, how did it go with Josh?
Miley Stewart: Oh, well he loves Hannah Montana and were gonna get married! How do you think it went donut?

Miley Stewart: ...And then I ate a napkin and then Jackson was all like : "You said duty." and then Lilly was all like : "Bug On a Windsheild!" and then I was all like : "GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!"... And that's why we have to move.

Lilly Truscott: You're in California now, and we do do that here.
[Jackson and Copper snicker]
Miley Stewart: What?
Jackson Stewart: You said said 'do-do!'
Miley Stewart: Grow up

Miley Stewart: OK, Daddy. We just have to stay calm. Just be calm.
Robbie Stewart: Honey, if I was any calmer I'd be dead.

Miley Stewart: Wow! So this is what a real Hannah Montana concert is like!
Josh: You've never been to one?
Miley Stewart: Well, I've tried, but I've always been busy doing something... else.

Miley Stewart: Lilly, I'm serious. How am I going to go out with a guy that doesn't like half of me?
Lilly Truscott: He doesn't know he doesn't like half of you... so just make him think half you he likes is all of you... as long as the other half keeps their mouth shut... the three of you should make a beautiful couple.
Oliver Oken: [confused look] I never get chick math.


"Hannah Montana: It's a Mannequin's World (#1.7)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: This is awesome, the store even made a mannequin of me!
Lilly Truscott: That's not a mannequin, that's a Hanequin miss Montanaquin!
Miley Stewart: Oh No!
Lilly Truscott: What? That was cutequinn!
Miley Stewart: No, my dad's shopping for my birthday present.
Lilly Truscott: You're right! All that dress needs is a bonnet, and a sheep, and you're Little Bo Geek!
Miley Stewart: I love the man, but I don't think he should be allowed in the teen department with a credit card.

Robbie Stewart: Miles, come here, I got somethin' to show ya!
Miley Stewart: [to Lilly] If it's the matching pants, you're eating it with me.

Robbie Stewart: Hey, does that pelican have have frosting on it's beak?
Miley Stewart, Robbie Stewart: [Miley and Robbie turn to each other] Jackson!

[Little Shopper tugs on Miley's skirt while Miley is pretending to be a mannequin]
Miley Stewart: Hey, cut it out.
Little Shopper: MOMMYYY!
[runs to mom]
Miley Stewart: [turns slowly] Don't be scared.
Little Shopper: Stop staring at me, you freak!
Miley Stewart: [laughs, to all shoppers] Kid thought I was real.
[goes back to mannequin pose]
Miley Stewart: [Shoppers all run out of store]

Lilly Truscott: Come on Miley. So it's a dorky sweater.
Miley Stewart: Are you kidding? I look like a kitty kebab!
[pulls tail]
Lilly Truscott: No one here's gonna make fun of you. It's not like someone is gonna take your picture and put it in the school yearbook.
Amber: Hey birthday girl.
[holding up phone]
Amber: Say cheese!
Miley Stewart: [to Lilly] Quick! Cover my tail!
[runs away]
Amber: [to Ashley] Did you get her?
Ashley Dewitt: No. You?
Amber: [annoyed] No, I took a picture of myself by mistake.
[looking at phone]
Amber: Ooh, and I look fantastic!
[laughs]

Hannah Montana: [about her sweater] I'll wear it for an hour and make my dad happy and then it will mysteriously fall into the barbeque.

Hannah Montana: [opening birthday gift] Sheepskin seat covers? You got me a present for your car?
Jackson Stewart: Hey when I drive you to the mall, I want you to be comfortable.
[excited]
Jackson Stewart: For Christmas, I'm getting you chrome spinners!
Hannah Montana: Fine. And you're getting a black leather skirt with matching pumps. Mess. With. Me!


"Hannah Montana: Ooh, Ooh, Itchy Woman (#1.9)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: [to Lily] When you talk do you hear it, or is it like a big roaring in your ear?

Miley Stewart: What do you say we put up this tent, and make a fire, and
[Lilly and Miley start moving their arms around in a circle like they're stirring something]
Miley Stewart: cook ourselves up a big-pot-of friendship.

Miley Stewart: What do you say we put up this tent, and make a fire, and
[Lilly and Miley start moving their arms around in a circle like they're stirring something]
Miley Stewart: cook ourselves up a big-pot-of friendship.

Miley Stewart: Actually, lets go to the beach.
Lilly Truscott: [getting yanked by Miley] But the mall has cute clothes!
Miley Stewart: But the beach has cute boys!

Miley Stewart: [trying to get the class excited about the camping trip] Come on, you guys. Think about it. Open fire, sleeping udner the stars, the animals. CAW CAW. CAW CAW. WHOOT. WHOOT. Ratttttcchchch ratcchhh.
Amber: Um, what are you supposed to be.
Miley Stewart: A chipmunk. Duh.
Amber: Could you be any weirder?
Miley Stewart: Well, I was going to do a pig but you already have that part covered.
Lilly Truscott: [Amber and Ashley give each other a "oh no she didn't" look] Ooh, what do I smell? Bacon that just got burned!

Amber: [Miley makes an owl noise, then a chipmunk noise] what are doing?
Miley Stewart: A chipmunk, duh.
Ashley Dewitt: Sorry but we don't speak hillbilly!
Amber: Or wash our clothes down yonder in the creek!
Miley Stewart: Well, I'd do the sound of a pig, but you two already know that one.
Lilly Truscott: [Lily sniffs around] I smell bacon that just got burned!

Miley Stewart: [making animal noises] Whoo-whoo, caah-caah, chchchchch.
Amber: What are you doing?
Miley Stewart: A chipmunk, duh!


"Hannah Montana: She's a Supersneak (#1.3)" (2006)
Jackson Stewart: Miley, it's been 3 years. He might be lonely.
Miley Stewart: Well then we'll get him a puppy.

Miley Stewart: Lilly, my dad said no.
Lilly Truscott: ZZT! You think he said no, when really he said goooo. Noo, gooo. It's a mistake anybody could make, c'mon, let's go!

Lilly Truscott: Well in California, we do do that here.
Miley Stewart: [Jackson and Cooper snicker] What?
Jackson Stewart: You said do-do.
Miley Stewart: Grow up!

Miley Stewart: Remember my 'ha-ha' from before? I'd like to add another 'ha' making it a complete ha... ha... wait for it... ha!

Miley Stewart: [hiding from Robbie at the movie theater] I hate lying to him.
Lilly Truscott: You're on your hands and knees at a movie theater. The honesty ship has sailed!

Jackson Stewart: "What can I say, Dad? She snuck out, I followed her here... I'm just as disappointed as you are."
Miley Stewart: What are you doing?
Jackson Stewart: What does it look like I'm doing? I'm getting ready to sell you out.
Miley Stewart: Listen, buster, if I go down, I'm taking you with me!

Miley Stewart: [as Hannah to Jackson] I'm amazed you can stand without a spine.


"Hannah Montana: Achey Jakey Heart: Part 2 (#2.10)" (2007)
Ashley: [appears at front door] Hi, hi!
Miley Stewart: Ashley, are you lost?
Ashley: [comes in, starts laughing] Miley, you are so funny. I always liked that about you!
Miley Stewart: Mean girl say what?

Jake Ryan: [at red carpet where Miley is wearing an embarrassing dress] Uhh we forgot to feed the cat.
Miley Stewart: We don't have a cat.
Jake Ryan: Maybe we could make one out of your armpit hair.

Jake Ryan: He has an American girlfriend named Miley.
Miley Stewart: Weird guy say what?

Miley Stewart: Learn to love his flaws?
Oliver Oken: Like the adorable way he steals water from little girls?

Miley Stewart: [as Hannah, just after telling Jake her secret] Well, if it helps, you're doing better than Oliver. He fainted when I told him.
Jake Ryan: Jake Ryan does not faint. Leslie, on the other hand, is a little woozy.

Girl with ice cream: My mom has a taser. zzzzzzzz
Miley Stewart: Okay then. BYE!

Miley Stewart: Maybe I should just give up boys for good.
Robbie Stewart: Aw. Not for good, honey. Just until I'm dead.


"Hannah Montana: Torn Between Two Hannahs (#1.17)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: [after her dad found out about Luanne's plan] And what has all this taught you?
Robbie Stewart: That parents should believe their kids when they tell them their cousins are evil.
Miley Stewart: And?
Robbie Stewart: That I should always take my cell phone when I leave the house in case my daughtor gets tied up in her closet.
Miley Stewart: And?
Robbie Stewart: I'm sorry.

Miley Stewart: Great. My life is in the hands of Count Chesthair.

Lilly Truscott: [about Luanne] She seems nice.
Miley Stewart: Yeah, and a Venus Fly Trap seems like a pretty plant... until it throws you down a well.

Miley Stewart: Look, there's a big Hollywood Halloween party tonight, and I'd love for you to come.
Luanne Stewart: Aww! You really want me to come with you-uns?
Miley Stewart: Yeah. I really want you to come with... me-uns.

[Lily and Oliver have 2 Hannahs and they don't know which is Miley or Luann]
Oliver Oken: I've got it. Both of you kiss me.
Luann: Okay.
Miley Stewart: Ewww.
Oliver Oken: [pointing to second Hannah] That's Miley.

Miley Stewart: [calling Oliver after getting herself untied because Luanne tied her up] Oliver, I need your mom to drive me to a Halloween party NOW.
[Oliver responds]
Miley Stewart: Yes, you can come.


"Hannah Montana: New Kid in School (#1.14)" (2006)
Oliver Oken: I can't believe we're going to be THIS close to a famous person!
Miley Stewart: What am I? A grilled cheese sandwich?
Lilly Truscott: When you're Miley, you might as well be.

Miley Stewart: Lilly you dropped something.
Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: Your dignity.

Mr. Corelli: Jake there's no need to be heroic. You do enough of that on TV.
Miley Stewart: If he were really heroic he would've brought a pencil...

Jake Ryan Fan: Oh my god you're Jake Ryan.
Jake Ryan: Yeah I guess my disguise didn't work.
Miley Stewart: Shocker...

Miley Stewart: Excuse me, superstar, "Hottie of the Year"... you're point?

Miley Stewart: Sweet nibblets.


"Hannah Montana: I Want You to Want Me... to Go to Florida (#2.13)" (2007)
[talking about Hannah's new outfit]
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! What about the thing that you bought at the place next to the place that we went there one time?
Miley Stewart: No, that's too...
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, you're right. Plus, when you wear that you have to...
Miley Stewart: I know. And I hate those.
Lilly Truscott: Who doesn't?
Miley Stewart: What about the one I bought after the one I bought at the place next to the place?
Lilly Truscott: Ooh! The one that goes with the shoes with the things? I love that one.
Robbie Ray Stewart: Me, too!
Miley Stewart: Daddy, do you even know what we're talking about?
Robbie Ray Stewart: No, but as long as it doesn't cost me a wad of cash, I'm all for it.
Lilly Truscott: You're dad is...
Miley Stewart: I know!

Miley Stewart: You know I can do this. You can trust me.
Robbie Ray Stewart: But that's not the point.
Miley Stewart: Then what *is* the point?
Robbie Ray Stewart: The point is you're not ready to do this on your own.
Miley Stewart: Yes, I am, Daddy, and you know it. Come on, Dad. Let me go, please.
Robbie Ray Stewart: That's it, Mile. I don't want to talk about this anymore.
Miley Stewart: That's not fair!
Robbie Ray Stewart: I don't have to be fair. I'm the dad and I'm not letting you go.
Miley Stewart: [raising her voice] Why are you treating me like such a baby?
Robbie Ray Stewart: Because you're acting like one.
Miley Stewart: But, Dad!
Robbie Ray Stewart: No, Miley. Not another word.
Miley Stewart: Fine. How about three?... I hate you!
[runs off about to cry]
Robbie Ray Stewart: Miley? Miley Ray!

Miley Stewart: Listen, you one-hit bobblehead!

Miley Stewart: Okay, listen here, little one hit bobblehead, the only thing you're taking from me is lessons. Okay, lesson one: THIS is how you do the head thing. Yeah, that's right, I went there!
Mikayla: Well, you know where I'm gonna go?
Miley Stewart: Down the toilet with the rest of your career? Yeah that's right I went there again, and this time, I bought property.
Mikayla's Manager: Back up, kid, don't go shootin' your little tweeny-bopper head off at my client.
Miley Stewart: She started it!
Mikayla's Manager: Yeah, and I am ending it, little soon-to-be used-to-be!
Robbie Stewart: Woah, I don't know who put the burr under your saddle, but no one talks to my client that way!
Miley Stewart: It's okay Dad I can handle it.
Mikayla's Manager: You heard her, Z, why don't you wait down by the wagon.
Robbie Stewart: Excuse me?
Mikayla's Manager: Oh, and while you're at it, you might wanna shave the ferret off your face, okay?
Robbie Stewart: I'll shave mine when you shave yours! That's right I went there!

Miley Stewart: She's a two-faced, tone-deaf toad!

Hannah Montana: It is so great to finally meet you! I am a huge fan!
Mikayla: Yeah, I hate you.
Hannah Montana: Thanks! I feel the exact same... what?
Mikayla: Your voice is stingy, your music is stupid, your outfits makes me wanna puke on them, but it looks like somebody already did.


"Hannah Montana: It's My Party and I'll Lie If I Want To (#1.5)" (2006)
Jackson Stewart: [in a girlie voice] I had fun! Did you see that dreamy boy in the third row? WHOO!
Miley Stewart: We don't talk like that and he was in the second row!

Lilly Truscott: Hello, Hannah Montana's close personal friend Lola here. Oh my gosh. Kelly. IT'S KELLY CLARKSON!
[calm]
Lilly Truscott: hello.
Miley Stewart: Lilly give me the phone!
Lilly Truscott: So, Kelly felly, sorry to here the party was canceled.
Miley Stewart: Lilly give me the PHONE!
Lilly Truscott: What do you mean? Hannah said...
Miley Stewart: Lilly! Don't listen to her! She doesn't like me. Professional jealousy. Petty, petty, girl

Miley Stewart: [Lilly is leaving after Miley lied to her] No! Lilly! Wait! You don't need them as your friends. You've got me.
Lilly Truscott: But if you were really my friend, you'd tell me the truth.
Miley Stewart: Ok.I'll come right out and say it. You spit food on people, You follow them into the bathroom,and, you walked around for about an hour, with a chocolate beard.
Lilly Truscott: Oh how embarrassing! Why am I such a dork! Why do I always do that!
[beats herself on the forehead]
Lilly Truscott: Lilly when are you ever gonna learn!
Miley Stewart: No! Lilly! Don't be so hard on yourself! I mean the first time I saw the choclate fountain, I poured about half of it into my PURSE!
Lilly Truscott: [hops around on the lumpy couch] Your just saying that to make me feel better.
[lifts up seat cushion]
Lilly Truscott: what the heck are all these newspapers?
Miley Stewart: I'll tell you what they are. They're me not being a good friend. I got caught leaving the party early, and I didn't want you to know.
Lilly Truscott: Why were you leaving early?
Miley Stewart: Because it was no fun without you there.
Lilly Truscott: Really?
Miley Stewart: [nods her head] And you know what? It's never gonna happen again.

Lilly Truscott: But the mall has cute clothes!
Miley Stewart: But the beach has cute boys.
Lilly Truscott: To the beach!

Hannah Montana: Listen, I like you Trac, but if your going to by my friend, then she's part of the package too.
Traci: But she's sooooo uncool!
Hannah Montana: Not as uncool as you were when you shot out a snotrocket so big that it hit *both* of the Olsen twins.


"Hannah Montana: I Am Hannah, Hear Me Croak (#2.5)" (2007)
Jackson Stewart: Hannah Montana has never canceled a concert before, and she not about to start now. I know that would just break your heart... and when your heart breaks, Baby Sis, so does mine.
Miley Stewart: [hands Robbie Ray the board]
Robbie Stewart: [reads] You got a hot date for the concert, don't ya, Jerkson?
Miley Stewart: [turns her head to Jackson]
Jackson Stewart: Dad?
Robbie Stewart: She wrote it.
[points to Miley]
Jackson Stewart: I can't believe you think I'm that selfish that I'll put my own...
Robbie Stewart: What's her name?
Jackson Stewart: Jenny, and she's a total babe.
Miley Stewart: [looks at Jackson, disgusted]
Jackson Stewart: So put a cork in it, Froggy. I got a lot riding on this.
Robbie Stewart: Uh uh uh... use the pad.
[hands her the board]
Miley Stewart: [hits Jackson With it]
Jackson Stewart: [rubs Arm]
Robbie Stewart: Couldn't have said it better myself.

Jackson Stewart: Besides, what do you think's gonna happen? Just as the surgery's about to start, a meteor hits a bus, the bus drives into a hot dog stand, a giant neon weiner flies into the power lines, the lights go off in the operating room and the next thing you know, you're spending the rest of your life singing like Aunt Pearl after she swallowed that kazoo, remember?
[Imitates kazoo]
Miley Stewart: Oh no! I'm not gonna be Hannah Montana again all because of a giant weiner!

Dr. Meyer: [reassuring Miley that her surgery will be fine] Don't worry about it. It'll be fine. I could do it blindfolded. But I won't. I'm just saying that I could. Not that you'd know. You'd be out cold! Doesn't that make you feel better? It doesn't, does it? I should stop now.
Miley Stewart: You think?

Miley Stewart: [after hearing that she would have a one-in-a-million chance of losing her voice after surgery] Daddy, there was a one-in-a-million chance that you'd be a rock star, and that happened. There was a one-in-a-million chance that I'd be a pop star, and that happened. Face it! This family's One-In-A-Million Central!

Robbie Stewart: [in a nightmare, where Miley is a down-trodden washerwoman] Wait a minute. What's that in the corner of your mouth? Have you been eating the burnt bits off the broiler pan again?
Miley Stewart: But, daddy! I'm just so hungry!
[Eats more burnt bits]
Miley Stewart: Mmm! Month-old trout skin! My favorite!


"Hannah Montana: Mascot Love (#1.8)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Got any questions?
Lilly Truscott: A couple. First, What the hecky is a herkey? And second, if one of these is a pom-pom, does that make 2 of them pom-pom pom-poms? These are the questions that haunt me.

Lilly Truscott: You're going to ditch the Rolling Stones concert for me?
Miley Stewart: Please, those guys will still be touring when they're ninety!
Lilly Truscott: I thought they were ninety?

Miley Stewart: If this thing had a plank... YOU'D BE WALKING IT!

Miley Stewart: Come On! You can get this... we won't regret this... we'll be together... best friends together!
Lilly Truscott: When you cheer this way, I have to say ok... I know you must be right... but know i have
[looks at crowd]
Lilly Truscott: stagefright.

Miley Stewart: [during tryouts] And slide and slide... and do the butterfly... and dip and dip... and shake my little hips... I want you and you... to cheer it with me too!


"Hannah Montana: Lilly's Mom Has Got It Goin' On (#2.19)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [both Miley and Lilly rush to their lockers, but Miley gets there first] You're blocking my locker.
Miley Stewart: You're blocking my locker.
Lilly Truscott: Why don't you show some
[in country accent]
Lilly Truscott: southern hospitality, and move.
Miley Stewart: Why don't you assert your independence and move me.
Oliver Oken: Ok, what are you two arguing about this time? Did somebody forget their friendship weekaversary?
Miley Stewart: We don't have weekaversaries anymore, because we are no longer friends and this would have been our 200th and Lilly would've gotten that charm bracelet she been wanting. Oh well!

Lilly Truscott: Well, I don't need presents from someone who insults my family.
Miley Stewart: [yelling] I insulted your family?
Lilly Truscott: Thanks for admiting it.
Miley Stewart: [yelling] I wasn't finished... YOUR CHECK GRABBING MOTHER!
Lilly Truscott: Your me-man-you-woman pappy!
Oliver Oken: You know what you two need? A vacation on the beautiful beaches of Okenland. Wear a bikini, get a free churro.

Lilly Truscott: [to Oliver] This isn't funny!
Miley Stewart: [to Oliver] This isn't funny!
Lilly Truscott: I said it first.
Miley Stewart: I can sing... ha!
[walks off]
Lilly Truscott: [mockingly] I can sing ha!
[walks off]

Mr. Corelli: [picking countrys to demonstrate world trade] Well, we have Okenland, Sarahtopia, Lillitania and...
Miley Stewart: [puts hand in front of face] somebody else... somebody else...
Mr. Corelli: Hello!
[waves at Miley]
Mr. Corelli: Milantis
Miley Stewart: Uh... you see... today is a Milantian holiday... Banks... post offices all closed... please respect our traditions.

Jackson Stewart: [walks down stairs] Finally, there gone. Dad, the next time you host a PTA meeting, you should do it out in the hot tub, so I can see Lilly's mom in a...
[turns around to see Lilly's mom]
Jackson Stewart: [Lilly's mom waves] in the kitchen
[waves back]
Jackson Stewart: hey Mrs.T,
[to his dad]
Jackson Stewart: warn a guy!
Miley Stewart: [to Lilly's mom] And he doesn't have a girlfriend... go figure


"Hannah Montana: My Boyfriend's Jackson and There's Gonna Be Trouble (#1.21)" (2007)
Robbie Stewart: [pushes through paparazzi] CLEAR IT! OUT OF MY WAY! THIS IS MY HOUSE! GET BACK! HEY! why don't y'all go chase a crooked pollitician? at least he'll smile for ya!
[robbie smiles and twiddles his at to paparazzi then enters house]
Robbie Stewart: [robbie looks at miley and jackson] So! when exactly where you two gonna tell me you were dating?
Miley Stewart: come on dad it's not funny! it's horrible
[sits down]
Jackson Stewart: yeah how could anybody believe that i would go out with someone like her?
Miley Stewart: Jackson! it would be the luckiest day of your life if you got to date hannah montana and WHAT am i saying?

Miley Stewart: [Miley's mobile rings] OH GREAT! just what i need!
[miley answers phone]
Miley Stewart: hi Traci
Traci: Hannah! i can't believe you have a boyfriend and didn't tell me! and he's sooo cute!
Miley Stewart: Yeah, he's really emm... something!
[looks at jackson who is messing about with his belly button]
Traci: you have to bring him to the party i'm throwing for madonna tomorrow afternoon! everyone's going to be there! it's the perfect place to show off hannah's new Hottie!
Miley Stewart: Trace i don't know how...
[looks at jackson]
Miley Stewart: ... we could pass up an oppertunity like this! of course me and my... Hottie will be at your party!

Hannah Montana: Thanks for comein'! See Y'all next time!
[gets in limo]
Jackson Stewart: [follows hannah pushing through crowd] Take it easy people! she picks her nose just like everybody else! one nostrle at a time!
Hannah Montana: [shouts out window to fans] That is not true!
Jackson Stewart: [looks out at hannahs fans] Right... she has people do it for her!
[smiles and winds up window]
Hannah Montana: HEY! that was one time! my nails were wet and... Lilly offered!

Hannah Montana: [to Jackson] I hate what you've become!

Jackson Stewart: [walking up to house after Hannah Montana concert] Hey Miley, Got your keys?
Hannah Montana: Who's taking care of who?
Jackson Stewart: Oh Yeah right. See ya!
[walks inside leaving Miley as Hannah outside]
Hannah Montana: Very funny Jackson. Open up!
[knocks on door]
Paulie the Paparazzo: Hey Hannah! I new if I followed you I would find out where you Lived!
[takes pictures of Hannah]
Hannah Montana: Live here? No I am just visiting a... friend
[Jackson opens the door; Hannah puts her arm around him]
Paulie the Paparazzo: Looks to me like a BOYFRIEND!
Jackson Stewart: A what?
[He and Hannah hurry inside while Paulie takes a picture of Jackson and Hannah]


"Hannah Montana: Get Down, Study-udy-udy (#2.4)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [Miley, Oliver, and Lilly approach Rico to ask him for help with biology] Oh Rico!
Rico: Hey bubblebrain! How's it going?
Miley Stewart: Aw; smart, funny, and...
Lilly Truscott: Dead-on about that bubblebrain!
[Miley gives her an evil look]
Lilly Truscott: ... But just in biology; other than that, you're as sharp as a tick!
Miley Stewart: That's "tack"!
Lilly Truscott: You see?
[Miley mocks Lilly]
Rico: Good thing you two are pretty.
Miley Stewart: Okay! I'm just gonna come right out and ask you...
Rico: You need help in biology.
Miley Stewart: How'd you know that?
Rico: Please! Put together the grades from your last four quizzes and they spell
[singing mockingly]
Rico: "Duh-Duh-Duh-F"!
Miley Stewart: One of those with a
[imitates Rico]
Miley Stewart: "Duh-Duh-Duh-Plus"!

Miley Stewart: MOO YAH!

Miley Stewart: When I milk the cows on Uncle Earl's farm I use the Ulna bone that is in my arm.

Rico: [having seen Miley's "Bone Dance"] That song, those moves, your voice. It all reminds me of some famous singer.
Miley Stewart: Kelly Clarkson?
Lilly Truscott: Hillary Duff?
Oliver Oken: Jay-Z?
Rico: I got it. Hannah Montana!
[Miley, Lilly and Oliver all burst out laughing]


"Hannah Montana: Me and Rico Down by the School Yard (#2.1)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: Hey bro!
Jackson Stewart: Junior.
[points to himself]
Jackson Stewart: Freshman.
[points to Miley]
Jackson Stewart: No bro, gotta go.

Miley Stewart: Okay, Rico, you know my secret. What's it going to take to shut you up?
Rico: You. As my girlfriend.
Miley Stewart: Say what?
Rico: Don't flatter yourself, doll face. This is strictly business. I need some hall cred in this place, and you can help me get it.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, so all he's looking for is a little arm candy.
Rico: That and someone to reach the top shelf of my locker.
Lilly Truscott: [to Miley] You can totally do that.
Miley Stewart: You can totally shut up!

Miley Stewart: Yesterday we were girls. Today, we're high school girls.

Miley Stewart: [as Hannah] I say we jump out of bed tomorrow and say, "Yeah! Yeah!"
Miley Stewart: [next morning, as Miley, not wanting to get out of bed] No! No! No!
Robbie Stewart: Come on, Miles! Don't make me get the water bucket!
Miley Stewart: You wouldn't!
Jackson Stewart: [shivering, soaking wet] Oh yes, he would!


"Hannah Montana: When You Wish You Were the Star (#2.12)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: I wish we got an A on the project, what do you wish for?
Miley Stewart: Oh man, I wish... I wish there was no secret. It was just Hannah Montana all the time. It would sure make life a whole lot easier.

Roxy: Now you have some more time to spend with your mannnnnn!
Miley Stewart: I have a mannnnnn?

Miley Stewart: Angel, there has got to be a way to get my old life back.
Roxy: I told you Superstar, only one wish per customer. No refunds or exchanges.
Jesse McCartney: Hey babe.
[comes in and kisses Hannah on cheek]
Jesse McCartney: Ready for our picnic on Papoui?
Miley Stewart: What in the world is Papoui?
Jesse McCartney: The island I bought you.
Miley Stewart: Oh my gosh!
[to Roxy]
Miley Stewart: Jesse McCartney bought me an island.
[Gasps]
Miley Stewart: I'm sorry Jesse, I can't.
Jesse McCartney: Why not?
Miley Stewart: I'm sort of dealing with something right now, so...
Jesse McCartney: You're so cute when you're dealing with something right now.
Miley Stewart: That's sweet Jesse, but I think... I... I need to be alone.
Jesse McCartney: You're so cute when you need to be alone.
Miley Stewart: Jesse?
Jesse McCartney: You're so cute when you say Jesse.
Miley Stewart: Get Out!
[pushes him out the door]
Jesse McCartney: You're so cute when you kick me out.
Miley Stewart: I'm serious!
[closes door]
Jesse McCartney: Ow!
[gets hit on the nose]
Jesse McCartney: You're still so cute.
Miley Stewart: Angel, there has got to be some kind of loophole.
Roxy: Well you could... no... Well how about if you... nuh uh... Oh, how about... Girl, I got nothing.
Miley Stewart: Angel, I want my family back. I want my friends back, and Miley Stewert does not take no for an answer!

Miley Stewart: [Continuing the the song the gondola driver is singing] Oh mama mia.
Jesse McCartney: The perfect night. With the perfect girl.
Pierre: Starts singing again.
Jesse McCartney: I'd sing to you myself, but I need these lips for something else.
Miley Stewart: Eeep!
Jesse McCartney: You're so cute when you say eeep!


"Hannah Montana: Schooly Bully (#1.23)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [after not scaring The Cracker away]
[weakly]
Miley Stewart: Miley like a puma? Hi Ya? Miley run like a puma.
[She and Lilly run off]

Miley Stewart: [after the Principal leads The Cracker away] Oh you better run 'cause Miley like a puma!
[Roxie runs away shrieking]

Oliver Oken: I'll start writing your will.
Lilly Truscott: Oh, put me down for her shoes!
Miley Stewart: Ah, Fellowship of the wienies!

Miley Stewart: That's right! Roxy's the big cheese and the cheese always covers the cracker!


"Hannah Montana: That's What Friends Are For? (#2.18)" (2007)
Jake Ryan: Man, I mean, you don't want to be a couple and when I try to be friends, you almost wreck my movie. What am I going to do with you?
Miley Stewart: I don't know...maybe we should just forget about eachother.
Jake Ryan: Maybe we should!
Miley Stewart: Fine!
Jake Ryan: Fine!
[walks out the door]
Jake Ryan: [comes back in] Ok, this is not working for me.

Hannah Montana: [as Miley, talking to Jackson] My life is complicated enough, the last thing I need is more drama.
[turns around to go into house]
Jake Ryan: [stands up] Hey Miley.
Hannah Montana: Helloooo, drama.

Hannah Montana: [answers the phone] Hello. What would you like to give?
Mikayla: I'd like to give you singing lessons. Just heard your new single... ouch.
Hannah Montana: Well I just heard yours and I thought it was fantastic.
Mikayla: Really?
Hannah Montana: Yeah. My brother got ahold of some bad catfish so we played it for him to induce vomiting. It was like BAM! Insta-puke.
Mikayla: Has been.
Hannah Montana: Never was.
Mikayla: Bottle blonde.
Hannah Montana: Lipsyncher.
Mikayla: Bra stuffer.
Hannah Montana: Uh! I hate you.
Mikayla: Like I care.

Mikayla: I still hate you.
Hannah Montana: Hate makes you ugly. Oops, too late.


"Hannah Montana: Sleepwalk This Way (#2.11)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: Gotta tell Dad.

Miley Stewart: Bunny man say what?

Ms. Kunkle: Who's talking?
Miley Stewart: [sleepwalking] You are Skunkle! In that awful prison warden voice of yours. It is torture!
Ms. Kunkle: [reacts in shock to Miley's "Skunkle" comment] What did you say to me?
Rico: She said your voice sounds like a prison warden. Oh, and it's torture.
Ms. Kunkle: I heard her.
Rico: Just trying to help.
Ms. Kunkle: I don't need your help!
Miley Stewart: [sleepwalking] What you need is to stop borrowing your grandmother's clothes.
Ms. Kunkle: Hey-ohhhh!


"Hannah Montana: Good Golly, Miss Dolly (#1.16)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: He loves me. He loves me not and now I need more petals!

Miley Stewart: Lilly! Less squeaky, more sneaky!

Miley Stewart: There's more other things in life like world peace and... Whales! Why can't we do a song about whales? And not stupid boy whales, girl whales. Happy independent girl whales.
Robbie Stewart: I'll get on it darling. Girl whales doing there nails. Don't need no males. Practically writes itself.


"Hannah Montana: You're So Vain, You Probably Think This Zit Is About You (#1.13)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: Come on, Lilly. This is really getting stupid, there's nobody up here.
[Robbie carrying Lilly on his back]
Robbie Stewart: We passed stupid on the 3rd floor. Now we're up to sports hernia.
[Robbie setting Lilly down when they reach the roof]

Miley Stewart: High five!
[Lilly misses Miley's hand and slaps Miley on forehead and knocks her down; Lilly's phone rings]
Miley Stewart: Answer your phone before your hurt someone else!

Miley Stewart: Looks don't matter.
Lilly Truscott: Easy for you to say. You're the poster child for perfect skin.
Miley Stewart: This isn't about me. Or my perfect skin.


"Hannah Montana: Smells Like Teen Sellout (#1.25)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: You should sell out more often!
Miley Stewart: I didn't sell out!
Lilly Truscott: Saying you love something that makes you yak?
Miley Stewart: Oh, please. Everyone exaggerates in commercials. Do you really think that football player's mom follows him around with a can of soup? I think not!

Lilly Truscott: You don't look so good!
Hannah Montana: I've got a funny... Coming out of my tummy!
Lilly Truscott: Everybody clear!

Hannah Montana: My time, is now. My perfume, is Oh Wow, Complete the circle. I've never smelled anything, like it before.


"Hannah Montana: Money for Nothing, Guilt for Free (#1.19)" (2006)
Miley Stewart: This is going to be easier than finding a mullet in a Trucker's convention!
Oliver Oken, Lilly Truscott: What?
Miley Stewart: Ya'll wouldn't last ten seconds in Tenesse.

Lilly Truscott: i'd bet she'd take a donation from a generous celiberty
Miley Stewart: i'd bet she would
Oliver Oken: yeah where we going to find one of those
[Miley and Lilly hit him with pillows at the same time]
Miley Stewart: you'd think he'd learn by now

Miley Stewart: Something ain't right here
[miley and lily come up from ball pit wearing each others wig]
Lilly Truscott: You look good in purple
Miley Stewart: Thank you
[they duck back under the balls]


"Hannah Montana: My Best Friend's Boyfriend (#2.7)" (2007)
Lucas: You're so cute, Lilypad.
Lilly Truscott: Not as cute as you, Lukey-Wukey.
Miley Stewart: I think I'm goin' to pukey-wukey.

Miley Stewart: You're the one who's all "You see that cloud, too? How about we make it our cloud. What? You ran into a tree, too, awww!"

Lilly Truscott: Well, you could've sat with us at lunch today.
Miley Stewart: I did sit with you at lunch today.


"Hannah Montana: Achey Jakey Heart: Part 1 (#2.9)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: Lilly! Why do you read that tabloid trash? They're nothing but lies.
Lilly Truscott: [clears throat] Hannah Montana looks fabulous...
Miley Stewart: With the occasional glimmer of truth.
Lilly Truscott: You didn't let me finish... Too bad she's really A GUY!
Miley Stewart: [grabs magazine] You have got to be kidding.
Lilly Truscott: I can't believe you didn't tell me. You slept over at my house! You borrowed my bras!
Miley Stewart: Hey, I look gooood in a mustache. Oh yeah, I would definitely date me.
Lilly Truscott: Me too.
Miley Stewart, Lilly Truscott: [they look at each other strangely] Awkward!

Miley Stewart: Nothing you say EVER means anything! You're the same jerk you were six months ago, except now
[picks up salami]
Miley Stewart: You're a jerk with a headache.
Jake Ryan: [n a suit of armor] I don't have a-
[Miley holds up salami and smiles]
Jake Ryan: Oh no.
[puts mask on his suit of armor down and holds up his shield]
Miley Stewart: Oh yes!
[hits him with salami until he leaves]

Ashley dewitt: Hey, best friend!
Miley Stewart: Ashley, are you lost?
Ashley dewitt: Oh, Miley, you're SO funny!
Miley Stewart: Mean girl say what?


"Hannah Montana: Joannie B. Goode (#2.28)" (2008)
Miley Stewart: [after being knocked down by hockey players] I heard a ding... Are my brownies ready?

Miley Stewart: But I don't like your girlfriend.
Oliver Oken: That's okay, she doesn't like you either... and besides chances are one of us is gonna date someone the other two can't stand.
Lilly Truscott: Yeah, remember Josh.
Oliver Oken: Oh yeah and Trey... ugh...
Lilly Truscott: ugh... I know... and Jake...
Oliver Oken: Oh my gosh...
Miley Stewart: Ok I get it


"Hannah Montana: Song Sung Bad (#2.15)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: I really would like to sing, but I think I'm coming down with something.
Amber: Oh, you're coming down with something, alright. *Chicken* pox.
Ashley: Emphasis on the chicken.
Amber: I *put* an emphasis on the chicken.

Amber: It's OK. Since we know you can't sing as well as me, you can always do one of your pig calls.
Miley Stewart: Oh, you mean like this? "Amber! Ashley! Get in here!"
Ashley: That's funny. Her pig said our names.
[pause]
Ashley: Oh, I get it.


"Hannah Montana: The Test of My Love (#2.27)" (2008)
Lilly Truscott: [talking about Orlando Bloom] and one day I'll be the Lilly Bloom.
Miley Stewart: Lilly Bloom?
Lilly Truscott: I know... how cool is that!

Miley Stewart: ;On her and trey's potential date; Tonight... Tonight's gonna be...
Lilly Truscott: PERFECT...
Trey Harris: Woah
Lilly Truscott: ...for you to go out because I your best friend, will be at a charity put-put golf tournament, filling in for another friend, a blonde one who sings alot
Miley Stewart: ;Interrupts Lilly; Uh, uh uh, too much information


"Hannah Montana: Don't Stop Til You Get the Phone (#2.17)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: Well, this does look pretty ridiculous. I mean, with your hair in rollers, your eyes bugging out, your "Miley" necklace flopping all over the place...
[realizes that this could blow Miley's secret]
Miley Stewart: [realizing it as well] Future-of-sleaze-journalism-say-what?

Lilly Truscott: I'm on the front page! Don't I look so cute when I'm scared?
Miley Stewart: If you don't get over yourself in about three seconds, you're gonna look absolutely *adorable*.


"Hannah Montana: The Idol Side of Me (#1.24)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: If there's one thing I learned, it's that When you fight fire with fire, you just get burnt.

Lilly Truscott: People will be downloading this for years!
Miley Stewart: She won't get hurt or anything, right?
Lilly Truscott: Just her pride... nation wide... no where to hide... humilifide... sat inside...
Miley Stewart: [taps Lily on the shoulde] Are you done?
Lilly Truscott: Just remember you go through red and she goes through the green.
Lilly Truscott: Cause shes mean... like an evil queen...
[Miley gives her the look]
Lilly Truscott: Now I'm done.


"Hannah Montana: Bad Moose Rising (#1.26)" (2007)
Oliver Oken: [Eating ice cream sloppily] I don't understand why you don't just dump the kid and go home.
Miley Stewart: And I don't understand why you eat with your face.

Jackson Stewart: Ok, see, that's easy to say when you don't actually *have* a little sister
Miley Stewart: It's not my fault, I always wanted one
Jackson Stewart: Yeah, I always wanted a puppy but they brought you home insted


"Hannah Montana: Debt It Be (#1.20)" (2006)
Oliver Oken: I think I'm in love.
[picks up a sandwich]
Oliver Oken: You're wearing avocado aren't you, do you know what that does to me.
Miley Stewart: What's wrong with you boy?
Oliver Oken: It's free food, I'm a guy, do the math.

Miley Stewart: I have to have these shoes!
Oliver Oken: Why?
Miley Stewart: They are shoes, I am a girl, do the math


"Hannah Montana: Grandmas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Play Favorites (#1.6)" (2006)
Robbie Stewart: [robby ray talking on cell phone] we're rehearsing to meet the Queen, no not Latifah i'm talking about the Queen of England
Miley Stewart: hey Simon when I met that Queen all I had to rehearse was what's up girlfriend.
Miley Stewart: you get it.
Simon: yes unfortunately I did

Lilly Truscott: waxy airplane earphones you're kidding right
Miley Stewart: with little gray hairs still stuck to them
Lilly Truscott: ugg!


"Hannah Montana: The Wheel Near My Bed (Keeps on Turnin') (#3.29)" (2010)
Miley Stewart: That dang hamster eating and drinking and peeing and eating and drinking and peeing


"Hannah Montana: Got to Get Her Out of My House (#3.28)" (2010)
Miley Stewart: Do I amuse you? Do you think of me as some kind of clown?


"Hannah Montana: You Gotta Not Fight for Your Right to Party (#2.6)" (2007)
Miley Stewart: [pretending to be Jackson] Girls. Cars. Nose hair.
[makes armpit farting noises]


"Hannah Montana: Ready, Set, Don't Drive (#3.2)" (2008)
Miley Stewart: I-I-I Gotta Go Potty


"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: That's So Suite Life of Hannah Montana (#2.20)" (2006)
Cody Martin: You- You're Hannah Montana!
Hannah Montana: And... you're wearing cake.
[Hannah wipes her finger on Cody's shirt, and tastes the cake]
Hannah Montana: Mmm, vanilla! My favorite!


"Hannah Montana: What I Don't Like About You (#3.13)" (2009)
Miley Stewart: Coldplay, Radiohead, hello - Hannah Montana in the room.


"Hannah Montana: Uptight (Oliver's All Right) (#3.24)" (2009)
Miley Stewart: Good night, nurse! Oliver is crushing on someone old enough to remember The Beatles!
Lilly Truscott: The who?
Miley Stewart: Them too.


"Hannah Montana: Wherever I Go (#4.13)" (2011)
Miley Stewart: Over-sized sweatshirt buying daddy who just said three time academy award winning director/producer of Jaws, Jurassic Park, E.T., Men In Black 1 and 2, wants me to star in his next big blockbuster opposite of Mission Impossible hunky hunk Tom Cruise say what?


"Hannah Montana: I Will Always Loathe You (#2.20)" (2007)
Lilly Truscott: [talking about Mamaw and Aunt Dolly's 30 year fight] So this whole feud started over a boy?
Miley Stewart: Yep. It was high-school. Mamaw was having a summer romance and then aunt dolly bounced in and, well that was pretty much all she had to do! Mamaw never forgave aunt dolly for stealing the love of her life. Mr Elvis Presley
Lilly Truscott: Noooo!
Miley Stewart: Yes!
Lilly Truscott: No!
Miley Stewart: Yes!
Lilly Truscott: No!
Jackson Stewart: [on the couch, trying to sleep] Yessss! Yes, yes, Elvis. Elvis with the pelvis and the hair and the hunka hunk of burning love. Guys I haven't slept all night and my back is killing me. So Please! For the love all that is good and pure in this forsaken universe, ZIP-IT!


"Hannah Montana: Love That Lets Go (#4.7)" (2010)
Miley Stewart: I know it was wrong, but I knew you'd like riding Blue Jeans. And you did, up until the whole little boo-boo part.
Lilly Truscott: Come here, I'll boo-boo you!


Disaster Movie (2008)
Will: [singing] I'm fucking Matt Damon.
Amy: You're fucking Matt Damon?
[singing]
Amy: Well I'm fucking Hannah Montana!
Hannah Montana: [singing] She's fucking Hannah Montana! Backstage, at my concert, fucks me on my parents' bed! After school, at my locker, in the car I give her head! I'm also fucking the Flava!
Flava-Flav Look-A-Like: [singing] Yeah, it's Flava-Flav, foo'! You know what time it is, 'cause I'm fucking Juney too!
Juney: [singing] Yeah, I know, but it's true: Flava-Flav, he fucks me too.
Michael Cera Look-A-Like: [singing] And I swap with Calvin, and he swaps with that dude.
All: And we're all fucking Hellboy!