Peter Brady
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Quotes for
Peter Brady (Character)
from "The Brady Bunch" (1969)

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The Brady Bunch Movie (1995)
Marcia Brady: [suggesting a way to raise money] I've got it! We could enter that Search For The Stars contest! First prize is twenty thousand dollars!
Greg Brady: That's a great idea, Marcia!
Bobby Brady: Great idea, Marcia!
Jan Brady: Am I invisible? Do I not have a voice? I had that idea two days ago!
Peter Brady: [disgusted] Oh come on, Jan.

Holly: I think you're really neato.
[kisses Peter]
Peter Brady: [Peter's voice has suddenly dropped an octave] Why uh, thank you Holly. I think you're Ginger and Mary Ann combined.

Peter Brady: If Mom and Dad have to sell the house, we'll have to move.
Bobby Brady: Go to a new school.
Jan Brady: Make new friends.
Marcia Brady: But Jan, you don't have any friends.

Greg Brady: And that's why I called this meeting.
Marcia Brady: Greg, what are we going to do?
Peter Brady: Yeah, if we don't raise $20,000 in one week, we'll have to move.
Bobby Brady: And go to a new school.
Jan Brady: And make new friends.
Marcia Brady: But Jan, you don't have any friends.

Peter Brady: Hey, mom always said don't play ball in the house.

"Day by Day: A Very Brady Episode (#2.11)" (1989)
Peter Brady: Remember Chuck, you're running for president of student council.
Ross Harper: Oh no, not me! Not Chuck Brady! No, no. No, I don't engage in extracurricular activities.
Mike Brady: Chuck, I think we have to talk.
[Ross hears dramatic Brady Bunch music playing but he can't discern the source]
Mike Brady: Chuck, I know that sometimes we're afraid of new challenges, but that's what growing up is all about.
[the music stops]
Mike Brady: I'm glad we had this talk.

Ross Harper: I'm feelin' a little cooped up. Why don't we go to the mall?
Peter Brady: Mall? What's a mall?
Ross Harper: You know, it's a place with all these stores, great lookin' girls.
Bobby Brady: Girls! I'd rather kiss a basketball or a catcher's mitt than any dumb old girl!

Ross Harper: What do ya say we get on our bikes and we go somewhere?
Peter Brady: Don't be a turnip-brain, Chuck! We never ride our bikes!
Bobby Brady: We just fix 'em!

"Robot Chicken: Suck It (#2.1)" (2006)
Jan Brady: Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! How come she gets blown up, and I don't?
[Mike throws a grenade at her]

Greg Brady: No, we wouldn't go to Hell, because she's not really our sister.
Peter Brady: So, these feelings are natural?

Greg Brady: Damn you, tiki idol!

"The Brady Bunch: A Fistful of Reasons (#2.8)" (1970)
[Cindy and Peter are walking home, after school, but they are followed by numerous other school students]
Peter Brady: Why are all these kids following us for? They don't walk home this way.
Cindy Brady: I guess they wanted to watch.
Peter Brady: Watch what?
Cindy Brady: The fight.
Peter Brady: How do they know there might be a fight?
Cindy Brady: I guess, maybe I mentioned it.
Peter Brady: Aw, Cindy!
[they all walk to Buddy Hinton's 'tree' and stop temporarily]
Buddy Hinton: Well, if it isn't baby talk and the chicken again. Hey, chicken, let's hear you cackle.
Peter Brady: Let's not start this again, Buddy.
Buddy Hinton: I want to hear you cackle, chicken, come on.
[Buddy Hinton then started making clucking sounds, much like imitating a hen, when laying an egg]
Peter Brady: That's dumb. Why not just cut out all the teasing?
Buddy Hinton: Hey, baby talk. Itty-bitty, itsy-bitsy baby talk.
Peter Brady: Cut it out.
Buddy Hinton: What will you do about it?
Peter Brady: Let's reason. Let's talk about it.
Buddy Hinton: Shut up or fight!
Peter Brady: Don't you want to talk about it?
Buddy Hinton: You heard me! Shut up or fight!
Peter Brady: Okay, if that's the way you want. I'm ready.
Buddy Hinton: You asked for it!
[Peter ducked or avoided Buddy's attempted fist strike and then Peter successfully struck Buddy Hinton to the ground]

[Just after Buddy Hinton missed striking Peter and Peter knocked Buddy down to the ground]
Peter Brady: Gee, Buddy, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, really, I didn't.
Buddy Hinton: You knocked my tooth loose.
Peter Brady: I did what?
Buddy Hinton: [lisping] It's looth. It's looth. Don't you see how it wiggles?
Cindy Brady: You sure talk funny.
[Other students quickly start laughing at Buddy Hinton's lisping]
Buddy Hinton: It's not funny.
Cindy Brady: Baby talk, baby talk, it's a wonder you can walk.
[Other students laugh again again and even harder, forcing Buddy Hinton to quickly get up and runs away from everybody]

Greg Brady: Buddy could stand a good licking. Might stop him from being such a bully.
Bobby Brady: Are you sure you can lick him?
Peter Brady: Are you kiddin'?
Bobby Brady: Well, last time he gave you a black eye.
Peter Brady: That was just a lucky punch.
Greg Brady: How many punches did he throw?
Peter Brady: One.
Bobby Brady: Boy, how lucky can you get?

"The Brady Bunch: To Move or Not to Move (#1.23)" (1970)
Greg Brady: Hey Pete, remember the night you ran into the bathroom door and they had to tape four stitches in your nose?
Peter Brady: Yeah, and the dent's still in the door.
Greg Brady: And the time Bobby tried to climb up the television lead-in.
Bobby Brady: Yeah, and the antenna came down and hit me right on the head.
Peter Brady: You had a bump on your head for 3 weeks.
Greg Brady: What about the time I fell off the garage roof?
Peter Brady: Right through the top of Dad's new convertible.
Greg Brady: I busted 3 ribs and the gearshift handle.
Peter Brady: Oh boy.
Greg Brady: Yeah, we've had some good times in this house.

Carol Brady: Is that McIntyre banshee on the loose again?
Peter Brady: There's something out here, Mom.
Alice Nelson: 3 very definite crashes.
Greg Brady: I'll say there were.
Marcia Brady: Greg was helping me with that flat tire on my bike when we heard them.
Carol Brady: Maybe Tiger's wrestling with those garbage cans again.
Greg Brady: Oh it can't be, Tiger's sleeping in the house tonight.
Carol Brady: In the house? Why?
Marcia Brady: He was getting spooked by all those funny noises.
Alice Nelson: Just like everyone else around here.
Peter Brady: After all, he's only human
[another crash sounds]
Peter Brady, Alice Nelson: Four!
Carol Brady: I think we better take another look around.
Alice Nelson: All of us?
Carol Brady: There's safety in numbers, Alice, come on.

A Very Brady Sequel (1996)
Peter Brady: Dad, I think I hit him in the head with these. I'm sorry, Mr. Phillips.
Mike Brady: Peter, drumsticks are not toys.
Peter Brady: Oh, they're not drumsticks, Dad. They're weapons.
Mike Brady: Well, weapons are not toys either, Peter.

[all the Brady kids and Alice are tied together by a staircase from Roy Martin, who left and kidnapped mom, they all think in their heads]
Bobby Brady: If I had been a better detective, I would've been on Mr. Martin sooner. This is all my fault.
Cindy Brady: If I wasn't too busy looking for my doll, I would've seen something suspicious. This is all my fault.
Kitty Carry-all: I bet he wouldn't have tied me up if I was Barbie. This is all my fault.
Peter Brady: What a dumb-head I am. I guess Roy was not much of a hero after all. This is all my fault.
Alice: I must've not put enough mushrooms in his spaghetti sauce. This is all my fault.
Greg Brady: Marcia looks great in those ropes... Wait a minute, what am I saying? This is all my fault!
Jan Brady: It was wrong to make up George Glass. This is all my fault!
Marcia: This is all Jan's fault.

"The Brady Bunch: The Personality Kid (#3.6)" (1971)
Peter Brady: Pork chops, and applesauce.

Peter Brady: Porkchops and applesauce. That's swell.

"The Brady Bunch: Juliet Is the Sun (#3.7)" (1971)
Peter Brady: "Hark!"
Jan Brady: "Who goes there?"

"The Brady Bunch: Will the Real Jan Brady Please Stand Up? (#2.15)" (1971)
Peter Brady: Okay, everybody, here's my sister: the new Jan Brady!

"The Brady Bunch: The Liberation of Marcia Brady (#2.19)" (1971)
Bobby Brady: How come girls do dumb things and they don't even know it's dumb?
Peter Brady: 'Cause they're dumb!

"The Brady Bunch: Katchoo (#1.5)" (1969)
Mike Brady: Jan's allergic to Tiger... and I'm afraid, boys, that they cannot live together in the same house.
Peter Brady: Aw Dad.
Greg Brady: That's terrible.
Bobby Brady: Where's Jan gonna live?

"The Brady Bunch: Ghost Town, U.S.A. (#3.1)" (1971)
Bobby Brady: Geez, I can't wait to get started. Grand Canyon! Wow!
Mike Brady: Well, it's not just the canyon, Bob. Now we can learn all about the Indian tribes that live there like the Havasupai, the Hopi, the Hualapai, the Navajo.
Peter Brady: How'd they get such strange names?
Mike Brady: Well, each name means something, Pete. Like Havasupai, for instance, means "Great People of Blue-Green Running Water."
Bobby Brady: How about my name, Dad? Does Bobby mean anything?
Peter Brady: Yeah. It means little man with great, big running mouth!

"The Brady Bunch: The Hustler (#5.21)" (1974)
Peter Brady: [misses shot in game of pool] Aww! This cue stick must be crooked!
Greg Brady: You're game's not improving but your alibis are.

"The Brady Bunch: Two Petes in a Pod (#5.18)" (1974)
Peter Brady: [Puts record on to play] How's that?
Pamela Phillips: Super! Let's dance!
Peter Brady: [grabs his knee in pain] Ahhh!
Pamela Phillips: What's the matter?
Peter Brady: My knee. An old football injury. I better go take a look at it.
Pamela Phillips: Well, let me help you.
Peter Brady: No, no! I mean, I just met you. I couldn't let you look at my naked knee.

"The Brady Bunch: Today, I Am a Freshman (#4.4)" (1972)
Peter Brady: I joined the science club at school, and I'm building a volcano. When I'm finished, I can make it erupt. And when it erupts, smoke's going to come out, and real molten lava's going to ooze all over the place.