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Quotes for
Goofy (Character)
from A Goofy Movie (1995)

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A Goofy Movie (1995)
Max: Dad, it's Big Foot!
Goofy: Could you back up a bit, Mr. Foot, uh, you're out of focus.

Goofy: [Half awake] How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?
Max: Uh... three and a half?

Goofy: This is a vacation with me and my best buddy.
Max: Donald Duck?
Goofy: No, silly, with you!

Goofy: Hey, Maxie. Let's play a game. You think of someone and I'll try to guess who it is. Man or woman?
Max: Aw, man.
Goofy: Man? Hmm... That's a toughy... let's see... Walt Disney!
Max: Right.
Goofy: Boy, I'm good at this! Now I'll think of one.

Max: Why are you doing this to me, Dad?
Goofy: 'Cause, I don't want you to end up in the electric chair.

Goofy: Well, I think the only thing for us to do now is to get you up on stage with this Powerline feller.
Max: How are we gonna do that?
Goofy: Now, you just leave that up to me.
Max: No, Dad, really. I think we should just forget it.
Goofy: Now, how come you always think I'm gonna lead you into some sort of calamity?
Max: Uh, d-d-d-dad?
Goofy: What's wrong now?
Max: Look!
[Max turns Goofy around; he sees that they are headed for a waterfall]
Goofy: Hyuk, a waterfall.
[alarmed]
Goofy: A waterfall?

[last lines]
Max: Roxanne, I'd like you to meet my dad.
Goofy: [taking Roxanne's hand] Enchantée, mademoiselle.
[he kisses her hand]

Goofy: Come on, Maxie, let's get this show on the road!
Max: Um, just a minute you... Party... Animal... You!

[the car is rolling down a hill]
Max: You should've put the brake on!
Goofy: Why didn't you just put it on yourself?
[Pulls brake lever, which breaks off]
Max: See? You ruin everything.
Goofy: Well, you ruined the vacation!
Max: *I* ruined it? I never wanted to go on this stupid VACATION!

[Goofy enters Max's room]
Goofy: Mornin', son!
Max: [in his underwear] Dad!
Goofy: Whoops. I forgot.
[exits, knocks then re-enters]
Goofy: Mornin', son!

Pete: Since we're all being palsy-walsy, how about letting me hook up the RV?
Goofy: Well...
Pete: Oh, it's just a tiny little extension cord, you won't even notice it.
Goofy: Oh, okay.
Pete: Great. P.J.!
[P.J. comes hauling a huge extension cord]
Pete: Hey, Goof, why don't you order us a pizza? This could take a while.

[Goofy and Pete settle into a hot tub at a motel]
Pete: So, uh, you and your son seem to be getting along just hunky-dorey, huh?
Goofy: Yeah, it's been great. You know, it's funny, but none of your techniques worked for me. The harder I tried the worse it got. Once I eased up, things just clicked.
Pete: Oh, that's swell. So, uh, no problems then, huh?
Goofy: Not a one.
Pete: [sighs] I... I just hate to be the bearer of bad news, but, uh...
Goofy: What is it, Pete?
Pete: Your kid's dupin' ya.
Goofy: What do you mean?
Pete: Well, I heard the little mutant telling PJ that he changed the map so... you're headin' straight to L.A., pal.
Goofy: [shocked] What?
Pete: Oh, you tried, Goof. He's just a bad kid, that's all.
Goofy: I don't believe you.
Pete: What?
Goofy: I don't believe you, Pete.
Pete: Well, hey, don't take my word for it. Check your map.
Goofy: I don't need to check the map. I trust my son.
[Goofy climbs out of the tub]
Goofy: You know, maybe Max isn't all the things that you think a son should be, but... he loves me.
Pete: [irritably] Hey, *my* son *respects* me.
Goofy: Yeah...
[Goofy leaves]
Pete: [calling after him] Check the map, Goof!

Goofy: [singing] Do you need a break from modern living? Do you long to shed your weary load? If your nerves are raw and your brain is fried, just grab a friend and take a ride, together upon the open road.
[spoken]
Goofy: C'mon, Maxie!
Max: [singing] All in all, I'd rather have detention. All in all, I'd rather eat a toad. And the old man drives that's such a klutz that I'm about to hurl my guts directly upon the open road.

Goofy: You look just like I did at your age.
Max: Please don't say that, Dad.

Goofy: I saved the best for last. It's been handed down from Goof to Goof to Goof, and now, it's yours, son.
Max: A stick?
Goofy: No, silly. A fishing pole!
Max: Fishing? We're going fishing?
Goofy: Yup. Just like my dad and me did - two best buddies fishing on Lake Destiny *away from it all*!
Max: I don't want to be *away from it all*, Dad, I like *it all*.
Goofy: Look, Maxie. We're using the same map me and my dad used. We'll take the same route, make the same stops, see the same sights.
Max: But that trip will take weeks, Dad!
Goofy: Exactly! Getting there is half the fun!
Max: Put the map away, Dad. It's not gonna happen.
Goofy: Careful, son! You'll ruin my past... and our future. What the map says... we will follow.
Max: That's very mystical and everything, Dad, but there's seriously this party I have to...
Goofy: Oh, there will be plenty of time for parties when you're older, Maxie. Why, when I was your age, I've never even been invited to a party. Look at me, now!
Max: Great, Dad.

Goofy: Came to see if you had any dirty clothes.
Max: There they are. Help yourself.
Goofy: Max, I thought we talked about this.
Max: Sorry, Dad. I'll take care of it later.
Goofy: What's the big rush?
Max: I'm running late.
Goofy: I can drive you to school on my way to work.
Max: Oh, no thanks. I need the exercise.

Goofy: Goodbye, house. Goodbye, mailbox.
[runs over the fence]
Goofy: Goodbye, pile of broken wood.

Goofy: [singing] Me and Max relaxing like the old days...
Max: [singing] This is worse than dragon breath and acne.
Goofy: [singing] ... in a buddy-buddy kind of mode.
Max: [singing] I'm so mad, I think I'm may explode!
Goofy: [singing] When I see that highway, I could cry.
Max: [singing] You know, that's funny. So could I.
Goofy, Max: [singing] Just being out on the open road.

Max: [writing] Dear Roxanne, couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd drop you a line. My dad and I are having a great time. We're only days away from L.A., and I can hardly wait for the big concert!
Goofy: [in his sleep] More "Hi, Dad" soup, please?
Max: [writing] Dear Roxanne, sorry I lied, I'm not really going to the Powerline concert. You may never want to see me again...
[speaking]
Max: Oh, man! I'm dead no matter what I do!

Goofy: You really had him fooled, Pete!
Max: Me? You jumped out of your skin!
Goofy: Uh-uh! I was just pretending for your sake!
Max: Oh, right! Sure!

Max: Dad... listen, about my directions... will you listen to me? I gotta tell you something, Dad.
Goofy: Why bother? I'm probably too stupid to understand anyway, right?
Max: Forget it.

Max: Hey, the car!
Goofy: What? Now you want to drive too?
Max: No, Dad! The car! Look!
Goofy: The car? What did you do now, Max?
Max: I didn't do anything, Dad! I only touched it!

Goofy: You locked it!
Max: *I* locked it? It's your door! *You* locked it!
Goofy: Well, *you* distracted me!

Goofy: You're doing the right thing, son.
Max: I know, but she'll probably never talk to me again.
Goofy: Well, if she doesn't, maybe she's just not the one for you.
Max: That's what I'm afraid of.

[Max's stomach growls]
Goofy: Max, was that Bigfoot or your stomach?
Max: Man, I'm STARVING!

Max: [sees Goofy loading the car] Goin' somewhere, Pop?
Goofy: Yep!
Max: Cool. Have a good time. If you're gonna be more than a month, drop me a line.

[at concert]
Goofy: Let's get you on stage!
Max: Maybe this isn't such a good idea.
[a pair of *very* attractive dancers walk past]
Max: Hmmm, then again...

[Goofy pulls the cigarette lighter out of the dashboard to heat soup]
Goofy: It's nice to know this thing's good for somethin'.

Goofy: Are you okay, Maxie?
[He slaps his face to wake him up]
Max: What did you say?
Goofy: That's right. A vacation, son! We'll spend some real quality time together.
[hugs him tight against his belly]
Max: [traumatically shocked] I think I'm gonna be sick.

[Goofy and Max are trapped by Bigfoot in their car, and it is about Max's suppertime. They are waiting for his soup to warm up, and Goofy starts chuckling with his mouth closed]
Max: What's so funny?
Goofy: "Hi Dad" soup.
Max: Huh?
Goofy: Don't tell me you don't remember "Hi Dad" soup? Oh, come on. Sure you do. You used to spell things out using the letters. Like, uh, "Hi Dad", or "Maxie" ,or...
Max: "Ambidextrous"?
Goofy: Yeah, that's... Huh? Naaa, little words, like, uh...
Max: "Hasta la vista"?
Goofy: Like "bye-bye".
Max: Or "I pledge allegiance"-...
Goofy: A-hyuk, or "I love you."
[They suddenly get a shock of sadness, then turn to face at the windshield]
Max: [happy again] Is it, uh, is it soup yet?
Goofy: Oh, oh. I almost forgot.
[Punches holes on can with buck teeth]

Goofy: [talking to Principle Mazur on the phone] Hello.
Principal Mazur: Yes, Mr. Goof. This is Principal Mazur. I'm calling in regard to your son, Maximillian.
Goofy: Max? Oh, my gosh! Is he hurt?
Principal Mazur: No, Mr. Goof. He's in trouble!
Goofy: Trouble? What kind of trouble?
Principal Mazur: Dressed like a gang member...
Goofy: Gang member?
Principal Mazur: ...your son caused the entire student body to break into a riotous frenzy!
Goofy: Riot? It couldn't be my...
Principal Mazur: If I were you, Mr. Goof, I'd seriously re-evaluate the way you're raising your child before he ends up IN THE ELECTRIC CHAIR!
Goofy: [getting traumatically shocked] The electric chair?
[sits and hangs up awestruck]
Goofy: What am I going to do?...

Max: It's only Powerline, Dad, the biggest rock star on the planet.
Goofy: Not bigger than Xavier Cugat, the mambo king. Everybody mambo!

Max: But, Dad, I don't even know how to fish.
Goofy: That's never stopped me. I'm gonna show you a little secret that has been handed down for twelve or thirteen Goof generations: the Perfect Cast.
Max: The perfect what?
Goofy: The Perfect Cast. My dad taught it to me when I was your age, and now I pass it on to you. Watch carefully now. You gotta stay loose, relaxed. Keep your feet apart. Now, ten o'clock, two o'clock, quarter to three, tour jeté, twist, pas de deux, I'm a little teapot, then the windup... and let 'er fly! The Perfect Cast.

[Goofy and Max have stopped bickering about the car, the vacation and Max's life]
Max: [singing] There are times you drive me, shall we say, bananas, and your mind is missing, no offense, a screw.
Goofy: None taken.
Max: [singing] Still, whatever mess I land in, who is always understandin'? Nobody else but you.
Goofy: [singing] Oh, your moodiness is now and then bewildering, and your values may be, so to speak, askew.
Max: [spoken] Gesundheit.
Goofy: [spoken] Thanks.
[singing]
Goofy: Who deserves a hero's trophy as we face each catastrophe? Nobody else but you.
Max, Goofy: [singing in unison] Nobody else but you. It's just our luck. We're stuck together. Nobody else but you. It's crazy enough to believe we'll come through.

Max: [singing] So your jokes are all, let's face it, prehistoric.
Goofy: [singing] And your music sounds like monkeys in a zoo.
Max, Goofy: [singing in unison] But when life becomes distressing, who will I be S-O-S-ing?
Max: [singing] If you're having trouble guessing, here's a clue: though he seems intoxicated, he's just highly animated, and he's nobody else but...
Max, Goofy: [singing in unison] Nobody else but you. We've turned into a true blue duo. Hard times, we've had a few...
Goofy: [singing] Like we're thrown in the drink...
Max: [singing] Like we're tossed out of town...
Max, Goofy: [singing in unison] But when I start to sink, hey, I'd rather go down, with nobody else but Y-O-U!
[Goofy kisses Max]
Max: [annoyed] Aw, Dad!

Goofy: [after Max slams the car door] All right, then. Guess I'll just have to go... all alone, that's all. Just sit in the boat... all alone. And talk to myself. All alone.
Max: I guess so.

[the first day of Goofy's road trip]
Goofy: [holding a video camera while driving] Day 1: Well, here we are, out on the open road, retracing the steps of my boyhood. And here's...
[he aims the camera toward a brooding Max]
Goofy: Maxie! Say, "Hi", Max!
[Max pays no attention]
Goofy: Well, how about a wave?
Max: [putting his hand in front of the camera lens] Not now, Dad.
Goofy: [laughing] What a kidder.

Max: Now look where you got us, Dad!
Goofy: Where *I* got us?
Max: You should've let me stay at home!
Goofy: Why? So you'd end up in prison?
Max: Prison? What are you talking about?
Goofy: Your principal called me!
Max: It's not what you think, Dad!
Goofy: You even lied to me!
Max: I had to! You were ruining my life!
Goofy: I was only tryin' to take my boy fishin', okay?
Max: I'm not your little boy anymore, Dad! I've grown up! I've got my own life now!
Goofy: I know that! I just wanted to be part of it.
[calmer]
Goofy: You're my son, Max. No matter how big you get, you'll always be my son.

Max: Is he gone yet?
Goofy: [Bigfoot does a "Punch and Judy" sock puppet show on the hood] Nope, still here.

Goofy: [Bigfoot has parked himself on top of the car and fallen asleep] Well, we might as well get some shuteye. I don't think we're going anywhere tonight.
[Goofy curls up to sleep, and Max taps him on the shoulder and hands him the cup of alphabet soup in which he has spelled out "Hi Dad." Max falls asleep, and Goofy tries to hold back tears]
Goofy: Hi, Maxie.


Kingdom Hearts II (2005) (VG)
Xigbar: Have you been a good boy?
Sora: Show yourself!
Xigbar: [appears] Oh, it sounds like you haven't
Xigbar: Sora! Roxas!
Sora: Roxas? Hey, did he just call me Roxas?
[Donald nods]
Xigbar: You've really put Organization XIII into a pickle, I guess that's why the Keyblade chose you, but man, did it pick a dud this time, you don't look like you're half the hero the others were
Sora: Are you done rambling?
Xigbar: Rambling? As if. All I'm trying to tell you traitor, is that your time is up
Goofy: [as Xigbar jumps down] Here he comes!

Sora: [Kairi had been kidnapped by Axel again; Sora is sad and worried] Kairi...
Goofy: Ya think it mighta been, Axel?
Donald Duck: [nods]
Hayner: Sorry...
Sora: Hey, it's not your fault. C'mon cheer up!
Sora: [sighs, sad again] Like I can even say that...
Sora: [Goofy looks at an emotionless Sora; Sora stomps his foot on the ground and Goofy falls back] I gotta help Kairi!
Pence: [the crystals of the Struggle trophy fall to the ground; Hayner, Pence, and Olette pick them up] That was close!
Sora: [picks up the blue crystal and holds it towards the sun]
Donald Duck: [Hayner, Pence, and Olette do the same; Sora turns into Roxas for a minute] Sora?
Goofy: Sora! Are you okay?
Sora: Huh? What...?

Beast: Listen Belle...
Belle: Yes?
Sora: [Beast is trying to find the right words] Say it!
Lumiere: Go on!
Donald: C'mon!
Mrs. Potts: You can do it!
Cogsworth: We have confidence
Goofy: Don't be bashful now
Beast: [he turns back to Belle again] Belle, I'd like you to stay... With me... Please?
Belle: [she smiles at him] I will

Goofy: You're thinking too much.

Goofy: We've been sleeping.
Cid Highwind: [sarcastically] Where? In cold storage?

Sora: [Elizabeth and Will are hugging] Good for them.
Goofy: Uh huh!
Donald Duck: [turns to Sora] Hey Sora, how come your face is all red?
Sora: [covering his cheek] What? It is not red!
Donald Duck: Aw, I know who you're thinking about!
Donald Duck, Goofy: [Donald and Goofy laugh]

Sora: I'm Sora.
Donald Duck: And I'm Donald.
Goofy: Nice to meet'cha Tron. I'm Goofy.

Saïx: True, we don't have hearts. But we remember what it was like. That's what makes us special.
Goofy: Whaddaya mean?
Saïx: We know very well how to injure a heart.

Goofy: Hey! It's... um... it's Iago!
[Sora and Donald draw their weapons]
Iago: No, wait, you got me all wrong
Donald Duck: You're Iago alright

Sephiroth: What is Cloud doing?
Sora: Beats me
Sephiroth: Hmph
[pause]
Sephiroth: By the way, you three...
Sephiroth: [Draws sword and aims it at Sora Donald and Goofy; Sora draws his Keyblade] Who are you?
Goofy: I don't think we should tell ya that
Sephiroth: [Looks at Sora's Keyblade] That's an interesting sword your carrying
Donald Duck: It's the Keyblade!
Sephiroth: So, that's a Keyblade, and you must be it's chosen weilder
Sora: So what if I am?
Sephiroth: I wonder if it won't change it's mind, once I defeat you!

Demyx: [screaming] No way!
[Demyx dies]
Sora: Anyone from the Organization who'd like to be next?
Donald Duck: Hey, Sora! Don't antagonize them!
Goofy: Yeah, we gotta go help our friends out first.
Sora: Oh. Sorry.
Donald Duck: Then let's go!

Sora: You're bizzare... Ah!
[Demyx pulls Olympus Stone out of his pocket]
Goofy: He's gotta be the theif!
Demyx: Now that's just plain rude!

Pete: Ooh, ow!
Goofy: You know, somethin' doesn't seem quite right here. Are you sure you're Pete?
Pete: Well, of *course* I'm Pete. I'm the captain of the steamboat. So stop botherin' me, see?
[waves his fist]
Pete: So hit the road! I gotta go find the little runt what stole my boat!

[Sora and co. are trying to say goodbye to Ariel]
Sora, Donald Duck, Goofy: [singing] Even though we're hitting the road, our worlds are all connected...
Sora: [spoken] ... which means...
Sora, Donald Duck, Goofy: [singing] We are free to come and go...
Donald Duck: [spoken] ... and sing!
Sora, Donald Duck, Goofy: [singing] So don't be sad and always know we'll come back soon to say hello!

Axel: Xemnas is using you to destroy the heartless- that's his big master plan.
Donald Duck: Xemnas?
Axel: The guy you just saw. He's their leader. Got it memorized? X-E-M, N-A-S.
Goofy: Organization XIII wants to get rid of the Heartless?
Axel: Man, you're slow. Every Heartless slain with that Keyblade releases a captive heart. That is what the Organization is after.


Kingdom Hearts (2002) (VG)
Donald Duck: We've got a problem, Goofy! But don't tell anyone...
Goofy: [looking past Donald] Queen Minnie?
Donald Duck: Not even the queen!
Goofy: Daisy?
Donald Duck: No, it's top secret!
Goofy: G'morning, ladies.
[Donald turns and sees Minnie and Daisy standing behind him]

Goofy: While we're in other worlds, we can't let on where we're from. We've gotta protect the world border.
Donald Duck: Order, Goofy, order!
Goofy: Right, world order.

[Pluto sniffs in the direction opposite of where Donald is walking to]
Goofy: Uh, Donald. Ya know, I betcha that...
Donald Duck: Aw, what do you know, you big palooka?
Goofy: What do I know?

Aerith: Okay, you know there are many other worlds out there besides your castle and this town, right?
Donald Duck: Yeah.
Goofy: But they're supposed to be a secret.
Aerith: They've been secret because they've never been connected. Until now. When the Heartless came, everything changed.

Goofy: Ansem?
Aerith: He was studying the Heartless. He recorded all his findings in a very detailed report.
Goofy: Gwarsh, uh, can we see it?
Aerith: Its pages are scattered everywhere.
Donald Duck: Scattered?
Aerith: To many worlds.

Sora: I wonder if I can find Riku and Kairi.
Donald Duck: Of course.
Goofy: [aside] Are you sure?
Donald Duck: [aside] Who knows? But we need him to come with us to help us find the king.

[the trio introduce themselves to one another]
Donald Duck: Donald Duck.
Goofy: Name's Goofy.
Sora: I'm Sora.
Goofy: All for one, one for all.

Doorknob: Must you be so loud? You woke me up.
Goofy: Good morning.
Doorknob: Good night! I need a bit more sleep.

Goofy: We're outsiders, so wouldn't that be muddling?
Donald Duck: "Meddling"!

Phil: You rookies still don't understand what it takes to be a true hero.
Goofy: So, what does it take?
Hercules: Well, that's just something you'll have to find out for yoursevles. Just the way that I did.

[as they're inside Monstro, something falls]
Goofy: Ya know, I think that big ol' whale Monstro just swallowed us. And for today's weather, expect showers.
[as something else falls]
Goofy: Heavy showers!

Donald Duck: But no frowning, no sad faces. Okay?
Goofy: Yeah! You gotta be funny, like us!
Donald Duck: [Donald shoves his head away] This boat runs on happy faces!
Sora: [downtrodden] ... Happy?

[Sora's party and Riku try vainly to close the Door To Darkness. Then a silhouette appears]
Donald Duck, Goofy: [gasps] Your Majesty!
King Mickey Mouse: [holding up his own Keyblade] Now, Sora! Let's close this door for good!
Sora: But... What'll happen to you two?
King Mickey Mouse: Don't worry. There will always be a door to the light.
Goofy: Sora, you can trust King Mickey.
Riku: Now! They're coming!
King Mickey Mouse: Donald, Goofy, thank you.
[Sora's party shuts the door. Riku watches Sora as he is shut inside the realm of darkness]
Riku: Take care of her.


Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas (1999) (V)
Goofy: [gets electricuted by the Christmas tree's lights] That'll put the Spirit of Chrismtas in ya!

Young Max Goof: Did you know that there are over two billion children in the world?
Goofy: Hmm. No wonder I keep trippin' over roller skates.
Young Max Goof: That means Santa would have to make, like, 800 visits a second, not including bathroom breaks.
Goofy: Well, I guess ol' Santy's been at it so long, he figured out all the shortcuts.

Goofy: [covered with baking powder] It looks like we're going to have a white Christmas after all!

Goofy: [with his head inside a turkey] Mmm, chestnuts.

Father: Wow, Mr. Goofy! That was incredible!
Girl: It's magic!
Goofy: Gawrsh! Christmas magic, I guess.

Goofy: Why, looky here. It's your ol' stuffed bear. 'Member what you named him?
Young Max Goof: Old Stuffed Bear.

Goofy: [to Max thinking he's Santa Claus] You sure do look a lot shorter than you do in your pictures... and slimmer too.
Young Max Goof: [imitating Santa] Oh, you know. Camera adds 50 pounds.

Goofy: [Writing a letter to Santa] Hmm. Let's see now. Oh! How about one of them snazzy electrical recliners?
Young Max Goof: Y-Yeah, Dad. Whatever.
Goofy: Oh. Don't want to turn into some highfalutin fancy-pants.

Goofy: We should slow down before we break the sound barrier!
Young Max Goof: What?
Goofy: We're heading straight for the mall!

Young Max Goof: Low bridge!
Goofy: Really? Where?

Goofy: Of course there's a Santy. Otherwise, we'd have a lot of jobless elves running around.

Goofy: A broken clock's right two times a day, and this time, I know I'm right!


An Extremely Goofy Movie (2000) (V)
Goofy: Now listen, son, that there X-Games fiddle-fadle may be all well and fun, but remember, you're going off to college to make something of yourselves.
Max: Exactly!
Goofy: You'll get a degree and the world will be your clam.
Max: Uh, oyster, Dad?
Goofy: Oh, No, thanks. I'm saving room for wienies.

Goofy: Don't forget to have some milk with those donuts!

Goofy: [sadly] One day you're changing their diapers, the next they're leaving for college.
Pete: [cheerfully] Well, Goof, the way I see it; this is my last night of babysittin'!

Goofy: [as Bobby drives the van away] Goin' already? What about breakfast? You need your three squares a day!
Max: [Hanging out of the window] Don't worry, Dad! We'll pick up some donuts on the way!

Goofy: Did you brush your teeth?
Max: Uh-huh.
Goofy: Comb your hair?
Max: Yeah, Dad.
Goofy: Did you put on clean underwear?
Max: [angrily] DAD!

[Goofy has walked into Max's classroom in full 70s attire, and Max is shocked and horrified]
Max: [muttering] Oh no, oh no, oh...
Bobby: Hey Max, is my vision blurred, or doesn't that guy look like your dad?
Goofy: Maxie!
Max: [grabbing and ringing at Bobby's shoulders] Kill me, just kill me now!

Goofy: I'm not gonna be at college to pick up after you.
[sadly, to his son]
Goofy: In fact, it's gonna be a long time before you see your old man again. What, maybe Christmas?
[puts his finger up to his eye, wiping away a tear]
Max: Ah, Dad, it'll go by fast.
Max: [chuckles, then mutters under his breath]
Max: Not TOO fast, I hope.

[at work, Goofy puts a toy robot together and daydreams that the robot's head is Max]
Max: [in Goofy's imagination] Hiya, dad!
Goofy: Maxie!
[Goofy hugs the toy robot tightly]
Toy Factory Boss: [over the intercom] Mr. Goof, an assembly line is for assembling! Stop daydreaming and get back to work... or else!


Lonesome Ghosts (1937)
Goofy: I know you! You're a ghost!

Goofy: Oh I'm brave, but I'm careful.

Goofy: I ain't a-scared of no ghosts.

Ghost: [On phone] Do you chase ghosts?
Goofy: Ahyuck! Do we chase ghosts?
Mickey Mouse: Y-y-yes, ma'am... Yes, sir! I'll say we do!
Ghost: Well, this house is full of ghosts. Listen.
[the ghosts take turns doing spooky laughs through the phone]
Ghost: Come quick. The old McShiver mansion.
Mickey Mouse: Okay, we'll be right over.
[Hangs up]
Mickey Mouse: Oh, boy! A customer!
Donald Duck: A customer!
Goofy: A customer?

Mickey Mouse: The telephone!
Donald Duck: The telephone!
Goofy: A-hyuck. The telephone?

Mickey Mouse: Ghosts.
Donald Duck: Ghosts!
Goofy: G-g-g-ghosts?

Goofy: [pins his butt thinking it's a ghost] YEOW! It's got me! They're pulling the life out of me! Help! Mickey! I got 'em! I got all three of them!

[first occurrence of this line]
Goofy: Somethin' wrong here.


Tomorrow We Diet! (1951)
Goofy: Hello, handsome.
Goofy's reflection: Hello, fat.
Goofy: Who are you calling fat?
Goofy's reflection: Who? You.
Goofy: Why, I'm as fit as a fiddle.
Goofy's reflection: A bass fiddle.

Goofy: I was an all around athlete.
Goofy's reflection: That's right, only now you're just all round.

Goofy's reflection: Get thee behind me, salami.

Goofy's reflection: Eat, drink and be merry, and tomorrow we diet.

Goofy: [reading a fortune from a weight scale] You are jolly, genial, lovable and...
[shocked]
Goofy: FAT AS A PIG? I must be getting fat.


Goof Troop Christmas (1992) (TV)
Goofy: The lights'll be up in a minute, Maxie!
Max: That's what you said an hour ago.

Goofy: There's somethin' me and Max used to do to get in the Christmas spirit.
Max: Dad! Not the Reindeer dance!

Max: Dad, let's not overdo it this time.
Goofy: This is the perfect time of year to overdo it!

[Pete and Goofy run out of the kitchen]
Pete: [flipped out] There's a bear in there!
Goofy: Don't worry. After he eats all the food, he'll go away.
Pete: Oh. That's good.
[pause]
Pete: [whimpering] ALL the food?

Goofy: Remember when we invented the Reindeer Dance?
Max: I was 5 years old. Legally stupid.


"Goof Troop: Wrecks, Lies & Videotape (#1.17)" (1992)
[Pete is on TV dressed as Goofy]
Goofy: Hey! That's me!
Peg: No, it's not! I'd know that jelly roll anywhere.

Pete: [Goofy is on Evil Boll Weevil's Torture Ramp of Death] So, my buddy Boll Weevil says he needs a racing strip down the middle of the ramp. And I think to myself, "Self, bet my old pal Goofy'd like to pick up a few spare bucks."
Goofy: I sure would! I got my eye on a new fishing bucket over at the hardware store.
Pete: Yeah, sure, whatever.

Goofy: [ghostly voice] Pete... Oh, Pete...
[startled, Pete sees Goofy disguised as a ghost, wearing a robe and a bucket over his head and holding a fishing pole]
Goofy: Howdy, Pete!
Pete: [terrified] G-G-G-Goofy? B-But... But... But you're a ga-ga... a gaa... a ghost!
Goofy: Yup. Drowned in my own fishing bucket. Some say I done myself in; that I couldn't face another vacation in the backyard, while my neighbor flew off to Hawaii with my ticket!
Pete: [swallows] N-N-N-N-Now... Now, look, pally, uh... It isn't like that at all.
Goofy: Ooooooohhh, you did it, Pete! Guilty! Guilty!

Peg: Of all the two-faced...
Pistol Pete: no good down daddy...
Peg: pot belly melon headed...
Pistol Pete: you, you, you Hawaii stealer...
Peg: vacation stealing globs!
PJ: Forgot 'slimy'.
Goofy: You mean, we don't get to go to Hawa-ii?
Max Goof: Oh, Dad.
Peg: Oh now, don't give up yet! You just waist until ol' lardo gets home.
[laughs]
Peg: I'll use my secret weapon.
Max Goof: What's that?
Peg: MY MOUTH!


Fathers Are People (1951)
Goofy: [noticing Goofy, Jr.'s toys all over the floor] Junior! Pick all those toys up!
Goofy, Jr.: No!
Goofy: What? Didn't Daddy tell you to pick up your toys?
Goofy, Jr.: Uh-huh.
Goofy: Well, pick them up, then!
Goofy, Jr.: No!

Goofy, Jr.: Play football, daddy?
Goofy: No!
[throws a football to him, hitting his nose]
Goofy: OW!
Goofy, Jr.: Play cowboy and Indian, daddy?
Goofy: No!
[shoots an arrow at the newspapers]
Goofy, Jr.: Wanna play soldier?
Goofy: I said no!
[drives his toy jeep running into his feet]
Goofy: OW!

Goofy: [Attempting to encourage his son to pick up his toys by telling him the opposite of what he wants] Now, Junior, don't you pick up a single solitary one of those toys.
Goofy, Jr.: [Agrees] Alright, I won't.
Goofy: That's a good boy.
[Shocked]
Goofy: Uh!
Goofy: [Angrily] Pick up your toys.
Goofy, Jr.: No!
Goofy: Yes!
Goofy, Jr.: No!
Goofy: Yes!
Goofy, Jr.: No!
Goofy: Yes!
[Growls in his son's face]
Mrs. Goofy: George, stop growling at the boy.
Goofy: [Frustrated] I'm not growl...
Mrs. Goofy: You'll get nowhere by arguing at his level.
Goofy: [Points to Junior] But he deliberately said...
Mrs. Goofy: Oh, for Heaven's sake, use a little psychology.

Goofy: [Attempting to encourage Junior to pikc up his toys by saying the opposite of what his son said] Now, Junior, don't you pick up a single solitary one of those toys.
Goofy, Jr.: [Agrees] Alright, I won't
Goofy: That's a good boy.
[Shocked in realizing his son said the oppoiste of what he wanted him to say]
Goofy: Uh!
[Angrily]
Goofy: Pick up your toys.
Goofy, Jr.: No.
Goofy: Yes.
Goofy, Jr.: No.
Goofy: Yes
Goofy, Jr.: No.
Goofy: Yes.
[Growls in Junior's face]
Mrs. Goofy: George, stop growling at the boy.
Goofy: I'm not growl...
Mrs. Goofy: You'll get nowhere by arguing at his level.
Goofy: [Points to Junior] But he deliberately said...
Mrs. Goofy: Oh, for Heaven's sake, use a little psychology.


"Goof Troop: Shake, Rattle & Goof (#1.22)" (1992)
Goofy Goof: That music sure is loud!
Maximilliam 'Max, Peter "P.J.: WHAT?
Goofy Goof: Turn it down!
Maximilliam 'Max: It doesn't go any louder!

[Max and PJ are watching a music video with the volume turned way up]
Goofy: That music sure is loud!
Max: WHAT?
Goofy: You gotta turn it down!
Max: It doesn't go any louder!

Goofy Goof: What's the difference between an elephant and my best friend Pete? About ten pounds!


No Smoking (1951)
[repeated line]
Goofy: Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! SMOKE!

Goofy: What'd I quit smoking for? I like smoking! I'm no quitter! I get a lot of pleasure smoking! I love smoking! It's my hobby!
[his eyes turn red and wild and he babbles]

Goofy: Hey mister, you got a cig, a fag, a pipe, nail, weed, rope or chaw or... cigar or snuff or anything, just ANYTHING!


Mickey, Donald, Goofy: The Three Musketeers (2004) (V)
Mickey Mouse: This is it guys, when these doors open, we got to make a very first impression.
[Donald stands, Goofy licks hair, then stands]
Mickey Mouse: Okay guys, we're on duty, and this place will be crawling with bad guys.
Donald Duck: Bad guys?
Mickey Mouse: [seriously] So, stay alert!
Donald Duck: [to Goofy] You heard him! Stay alert!
Goofy: Aye-aye sir!
[looks around, sees something strange with an ax]
Goofy: Bad guy! No! Whoa!
Mickey Mouse: Goofy!
[Goofy attacks himself]
Goofy: Gwarsh! He pulled an ax on me.
[Shows an ax]

Minnie: Just imagine. He'll stride into the room. Light will glow from him. I'll hear music. He'll bring me flowers.
[Flowers magically transformed into butterflies]
Minnie: And he'll sweep me off my feet. And I'll know he's the one, when he makes me laugh.
Daisy: You're majesty.
[pops on Mickey's body]
Daisy: It's time to cut the cheese.
[Record needle scratches]
Minnie: What? What?
Daisy: Here we are. Roquefort anyone?
[Knife shines]
Goofy: Knife!
Donald Duck: Bad guy!
Mickey Mouse: Grab her!
Daisy: Oh no.
[Mickey, Donald and Goofy accidently attacked on her]
Daisy: [during the attack] Ahh! Help! Ahh!
Minnie: Oh! Unhand her! Release her! Stop it!
[the fighting stops]
Minnie: Drop her!
[Mickey, Donald and Goofy dropped Daisy]
Minnie: She is my lady in waiting!

Mickey Mouse: All for one...
Goofy: And two for tea!


Epic Mickey (2010) (VG)
Mickey Mouse: [seeing what looks like Goofy's head in a glass jar] That's Goofy! I mean, sort of...
Gremlin Gus: It's Animatronic Goofy! Oswald built him, with the Mad Doctor's help. Oswald wanted a friend like your pal Goofy.
Goofy: [suddenly speaking] Gawrsh, hello, Mickey!
[Mickey jumps back, startled]
Mickey Mouse: [aside, to Gus] Uh, where's the rest of him?
Gremlin Gus: What happened to you, Goofy?
Goofy: Well, I was doin' some work in Tomorrow City when The Mad Doctor went and betrayed all of Oswald's friends.
[in a thought bubble, the Mad Doctor pushes a button]
Goofy: He had some friends of his own tear me to pieces!
[in the bubble, a giant saw-blade-wielding robot descends on Goofy; the bubble disappears]
Goofy: And now my parts are scattered all over Tomorrow City. But I know I can count on ya to put me together again, Mickey!

Goofy: [Mickey has brought all of Goofy's part to him] Are those what I think they are? A-hyuck! Yep, they're my parts! Thank ya, Mickey!
[all of the pieces magically assemble on Goofy]
Goofy: Thanks, Mickey! Now, I can get back to work, now. And boy, could this place use some cleanin'.

Goofy: [after he sees Mickey leave Ortensia's house] Watcha got there, Mickey? Oh, that's Ortensia's locket. Oswald gave it to her as a gift. I think it's even valuable. At least that's what the museum lady said. She once tried to buy it for a bunch of E-tickets so she could display it at the museum. Gwarsh, ya know, since Ortensia hasn't been around for a while, I'm sure she wouldn't mind if ya borrowed it. Just return it later, okay?


Mickey's Speedway USA (2000) (VG)
Goofy: Look at me!

Goofy: [after being hit by Pete] Huh?
Pete: Beat it, goof!

Goofy: [after clearing a track in first] Well, what do ya know! A-hyuck!


"Mickey Mouse: Goofy's Grandma (#2.6)" (2014)
Goofy: [Mickey and Goofy are inside Goofy's house in attempt to handle the spider Goofy told Mickey about] Careful, Mick. Don't look it straight in the mandibles.
Mickey Mouse: Oh, Goofy, it's just a little spider.
[Opens the door to another room and sees that the spider is actually gigantic. Screen cuts to the outside of Goofy's house as Mickey screams in fear]

Mickey Mouse: [Calling Goofy over the phone while his face is still covered with eggs and bacon after Grandma has smashed the breakfast on him and broke a furniture of his] Hello, Goofy.
Mickey Mouse: [Wipes the eggs and bacon off his face] Hello, Goofy. I'm sorry, but your grandma has got to go.
Goofy: [Over the phone] Oh please, Mick. Just one more night?
Mickey Mouse: Absolutely not.
Goofy: Aw thanks, Mick. I knew you'd understand. You're the best friend a guy could ever have. In fact...
Mickey Mouse: [Mickey looks into his living room to find Grandma talking on the phone at the same time actually speaking in Goofy's voice; shocked] Goofy?
Goofy: [Surprised to realize that Mickey has caught him] I'll talk to you later, Mick. Ii gotta go.
[Hangs up phone]


Crazy with the Heat (1947)
Goofy: Give me an ice cream sody!

Oasis Soda Fountain Proprietor: Uh-uh! The fee. Thou owest me six bucks.
Goofy: [angrily] I won't pay up!
[He continues to walk off]
Goofy: Doggone clip joint.
[the proprietor pulls him back, places a tall stack of plates in his hand and threatens him with a scimitar]
Oasis Soda Fountain Proprietor: Thou shalt not break any now, shalt thou?


"Goof Troop: Goofin' Hood and His Melancholy Men (#1.19)" (1992)
Goofy: [to a terrified Waffles] C'mon, boy, tell daddy what's bothering ya.
Max Goof: [coming in with a violin] The same thing that's bothering me: these dweeby violin lessons.

Goofy: [to Max, opening up the family photo album] Sit back and listen while I tell you about your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-granddad, Goofin' Hood.
[gasps for breath]
Goofy: Boy, I didn't realize how great he was.


The Fox Hunt (1938)
Goofy: Heigh-ho, a cheerio!

Goofy: [to his horse] You silly bloke!


Two Gun Goofy (1952)
Goofy: [singing] Oh, I'm a ropin' and a ridin' and a shootin' fool. Oh, I'm as tough and ornery, meaner than a rawhide mule. Oh, I'm as quick as greasy lightnin' when I go for my gun. Reach... A-hyuck! Ya mangy buzzards, reach for the sun.

Goofy: [slightly startled by a wanted poster for Pete] It's a darn good thing you ain't real.
[draws his gun]
Goofy: 'Cause you was, I'd get the drop on ya!
[fires his gun; the bullet ricochets about the environment before finally bouncing off the poster]
Goofy: [guffaws] And drill ya right between your eyes!


Goofy and Wilbur (1939)
Goofy: [shaking his glove that he mistakes for the frog that swallowed Wilbur] Cough up Wilbur! Cough him up!
[frog croaks behind him]
Goofy: Hey! Hey, come back here!

[Goofy has tried but failed to get at the stork that swallowed the frog that had swallowed Wilbur]
Goofy: I gotta cheer up. There's lots of grasshoppers in the weeds.
[suddenly tears up and sobs loudly]
Goofy: Ohhh! But not like Wilbur!
[suddenly, an egg hatches revealing Wilbur, very much alive]
Goofy: Wilbur! Gosh, Wilbur, thought you was a goner.
[Wilbur kisses Goofy]


"Goof Troop: Sherlock Goof (#2.11)" (1992)
Goofy: [Sherlock Goof has caught one of Professor Inferiority's henchmen in his rat trap] Oh, boy, a rat!
[scratches his head in confusion]
Goofy: A big rat, a big rat with a mask. Maybe it's a politician.

Goofy: [to Pete after he accidentally hits him with a cricket bat] Garsh, sorry about that, your lordship!, wrong mouse. Say I know you, you're... you're... garsh, now don't tell me, it's right on the tip of my tongue.
Pete: Professor Inferiority the master of crime, doctor of deviousness, king of chaos!
Goofy: Aw, that's not it. You ever pitch for the Dodgers?
Pete: [Grabs the cricket bat from him] Give me that thing, you goof!
[takes a swing at him]
Goofy: Watch it, that could really smart!
Pete: Stand still and I'll make you a genius!
[takes another swing at him]


Mickey's Trailer (1938)
Mickey Mouse: Hey, who's driving?
Donald Duck: Yeah, who's driving?
Goofy: Hyuck! Why, I'm driving.
[Realizes he's not and rushes back to the car, accidentally unhooking the trailer, which rolls away behind him]
Goofy: [not realizing the trailer is gone] The worst is over. It's all downhill from here.

Goofy: Well, I brought ya down, safe from sound!
[chuckles briefly]


"Goof Troop: The Good, the Bad, and the Goofy (#1.59)" (1992)
Goofy: If there's one thing I don't like about falling off a roof, it's the pain involved.

Goofy: Pete's a swell kinda guy, once you get past his personality.


"House of Mouse: The Stolen Cartoons (#1.1)" (2001)
Goofy: Here's your doggy bag, Miss DeVil.
Cruella De Vil: Forget the bag.
[eyeing a frightened Pluto]
Cruella De Vil: I'll take the doggy!

Goofy: yfooG s'tI .yekciM olleH
Mickey Mouse: Goofy, you're talkin' through the wrong end of the phone again!
Goofy: !spoO


"Goof Troop: Midnight Movie Madness (#1.6)" (1992)
Goofy: [to Max] Creepy movies don't agree with you, son.
Max Goof: What are you talking about?
Goofy: Remember that old witch in "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs"?
[guffaws]
Goofy: You were so scared, you had hiccups for a week!
P.J. Pete: "Snow White"?
Max Goof: No way! I mean, that was pickles.
Goofy: Max, you can't watch Grandma stuff a chicken without getting faint.
Max Goof: The past, Dad. You're talking about the past. I'm 11 1/2 now. Nothing scares me.
P.J. Pete: Except math tests.
Max Goof: That's different, P.J.

Goofy: Gotta go to the all night market before it closes.


Fun & Fancy Free (1947)
[Mickey has retrieved the key to the jewel box from Willie's pocket and has climbed back up to the box]
Donald Duck: He made it!
Goofy: He did?
[looks through keyhole]
Goofy: Here he comes with the key!
Donald Duck: [looking through keyhole] Let me have it, Mickey!
[the key goes through the keyhole and hits Donald, knocking him over]

Goofy: Hey, look!
[singing to the tune of "Funiculi Finicula"]
Goofy: Turkey, lobster, sweet potater pie / pancakes piled up till they reach the sky!
Donald Duck: [scat singing] Wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak wak!
Goofy: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
[his Adam's apple knocks out Donald]
Goofy: I wanna eat, and eat, and eat, and eat, and eat until I die!
Goofy, Donald Duck: [both singing as Mickey enters the room] Turkey, lobster, sweet potater pie / pancakes piled up till they reach the sky...
Goofy: [singing] Lots of starches, lots of greens, fancy cho-co-late covered...
Mickey Mouse: [holding up a chest of beans, cutting their song short] Beans!
Goofy: [disgusted] What do you mean beans?
Mickey Mouse: Yeah, fellas, I sold the cow for some magic beans.
Donald Duck: Beans?
[jumps into the ceiling throwing a temper tantrum while tearing out his head feathers]
Mickey Mouse: But Donald, these are not ordinary beans, they're *magic* beans. If you plant these beans on the night of a full moon, do you know what'll happen?
Donald Duck: Yes, we'll get more beans!
[takes the box from him and throws them into a hole in the floor]
Mickey Mouse: No, no, Donald!
Donald Duck: Magic beans! Phooey!


"Goof Troop: A Goof of the People (#1.33)" (1992)
Goofy Goof: Look that way, Maxie, these footprints could only belong to one person.
Max Goof: The swamp beast from Planet Nine?
Goofy Goof: No, Maxie, the President of Slime Co.!

Max Goof: Mr. Sludge figures that he didn't have to listen to you because you're just darn too public.
Goofy Goof: You mean the fella they name the public library after?


Cold War (1951)
[Goofy AKA George Geef has caught a cold and his boss catches him sneezing]
Boss: Geef! Take that cold outta here!
Goofy: [clearly congested] But boss, look. I don't have a cold.
[He sneezes again, knocking the phone off his desk]
Boss: Now look, Geef. A cold is nothing to be sneezed at.
[pause]
Boss: BEAT IT!

Narrator: [Goofy had been sent home from work early because of a cold he has] Poor Geef, an outcast from society, shunned by a cruel, cold world.
Goofy: [returning home and sneezing the front door open] Hello?
[sneezes again]
Goofy: I feel awful!
[looks around; no one is there]
Goofy: Where is everybody?
[sees note on table and reads it]
Goofy: "Honey, playing bridge at Mabel's. Dinner in icebox." Deserted!
Narrator: Deserted by the ones he loves the most in his hour of need, alone with his misery.


Two Weeks Vacation (1952)
[Goofy's peaceful sleep in a shack is disturbed by a train that passes by perilously close to it]
Goofy: [leaving the shack] I'm gettin' out of this here place!

[Goofy is driving along and sees a hitchhiker at the side of the road. He stops the car beside him]
Goofy: Uh, give you a lift, mister?
Hitchhiker: [looking at car] Hmm, no radio, no heater...
[kicks tires]
Hitchhiker: tires' thin, needs paint, older model... Mmm-mmm, forget it.
[Goofy drives off]


"House of Mouse: The Three Caballeros (#1.3)" (2001)
Narrator: A sure sign of smarts is one's ability to write, and the beginning writer is wise to choose a simple sentence.
Goofy: [reading a sentence written on the blackboard] "I am smart." How 'bout that?
Narrator: The writer can bring more meaning to the sentence with the addition of an adverb.
[Ludwig Von Drake appears and rewrites the sentence]
Goofy: [reading] "I am not smart." Hey!
Narrator: A conjunction allows an additional sentence segment to be linked.
[Von Drake rewrites the sentence again]
Goofy: "I am not smart and I smell." You little...!
Narrator: Don't be afraid to use other nouns as descriptors in your sentence.
[Von Drake rewrites the sentence yet again]
Goofy: "I am not smart and I smell like a monkey." That's it!
[chases Von Drake, only to trip and fall down]
Narrator: Remember that sometimes the best sentence is the shortest.
Goofy: "Ouch!"

Goofy: Well... there's Cubby, Darlene and... I know, Annette.
Mickey: Is that your final answer?


Mickey's Service Station (1935)
[Mickey, Donald and Goofy all see Pete drive up in his car]
Mickey Mouse: At your service, sir.
Goofy: You break 'em, we fix 'em.
Donald Duck: And how.


On Ice (1935)
Goofy: [Donald comes out of the water and Goofy hits him accidentally] Gosh! I thought you was a fish.
Donald Duck: Oh, yeah? Who's a fish, you big palooka?


Moving Day (1936)
Goofy: Ice!
Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck: Shh!
Goofy: [whispering] Ice.
Mickey Mouse: The sheriff.
Donald Duck: The sheriff.
Goofy: [Loud] The sheriff?
Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck: Shh!
Mickey Mouse: We gotta move.
Donald Duck: We gotta move.
Goofy: [as if talking to someone behind him] We gotta move.
[Notices there is no one behind him; laughs]


Mickey's House of Villains (2001) (V)
Goofy: [Minnie storms on-stage to confront the villains] Gosh. I've never seen her so mad.
Mickey: I have.


How to Be a Detective (1952)
Goofy: Looks like I'm gettin' to the bottom of this case!


Epic Mickey 2: The Power of Two (2012) (VG)
[in Ostown, Mickey, Oswald and Gus hear Goofy flying through the air and crashing into the ground]
Oswald the Lucky Rabbit: Goofy, what happened?
Goofy: Well, I was tryin' to fix these pumps, just like Prescott told me. Don't know what I did, though, 'cause they all went kablooy!
Gremlin Prescott: [defensively] I told him to overcharge ONE pump, not three! Yes, it makes the pumps slightly unstable, but it also gets the job done faster.
Goofy: Gawrsh, they looked more than slightly dangerous to me. I just think I'll just go ahead and use the pumps how Jamface told me.


"Goof Troop: Meanwhile, Back at the Ramp (#1.9)" (1992)
Max: Dad, did people really used to call you the Skull?
Goofy: Sure did, Numb-skull!


"Goof Troop: Slightly Dinghy (#1.11)" (1992)
Goofy: Abandon ship!
Pete: Abandon it? I haven't even paid for it yet!


Frank Duck Brings 'em Back Alive (1946)
Donald Duck: [seeing wild man Goofy] A wild man!
Goofy: Oh? Where? Where?
Donald Duck: You're it, bum!


Foul Hunting (1947)
Goofy: [singing to "London Bridge Is Falling Down"] I'm a-goin' to hunt some ducks, / Hunt some ducks, hunt some ducks. / I'm a-goin' to hunt some ducks / For my fair lady.


Pluto's Christmas Tree (1952)
[last lines]
Donald Duck, Minnie Mouse, Goofy: [singing] Deck the halls with boughs of holly / Fa la la la la la la la la. / 'Tis the season to be jolly / Fa la la la la la la la la.
Chip, Dale: [singing] Don we now our gay apparel / Fa la la la la la la la la. / Troll the ancient Yuletide carol / Fa la la la la la la la la.


No Sail (1945)
Goofy: [fishing Donald out of the water] Gosh! I thought you was a fish.
Donald Duck: [angrily] Put me down!
[Goofy drops Donald, whose beak gets stuck in the nickel slot of the sailboat]


"Goof Troop: Unreal Estate (#1.4)" (1992)
Pete: [Pete whistles] The Ultra Fin Laser Guided Telescopic Fish Finder, oooh sweetheart! That's just where I'd put it! But where am I gonna get the money? Oh wait! I could sneak $100.00 from PJ's savings account, $200.00 from Pistol's college fund. $200 from...
[Pete hears Goofy pounding nails onto some wood]
Pete: Oh what in tarnation?
[the pounding continues]
Pete: Hey, Goof! Put a lid on it!
Goofy: Hy-yuk! Just a few more tappy-taps Pete. It's a surprise tree house for Max. Hy-yuk!
Pete: Aw, well, keep it down! I'm figuring see!


Goofy's Glider (1940)
Goofy: [singing] High, high, up in the sky, here goes my glider and I, bye-bye!


Disney Sing-Along-Songs: Disneyland Fun (1990) (V)
[first lines]
Professor Owl: Today we're going to the Happiest Place on Earth, so sing along, everyone. We'll have some Disneyland fun! Let's begin on Main Street, just before the Magic Kingdom opens.
Goofy: [whistles "Whistle While You Work" while sweeping the sidewalk]
Mickey Mouse: [is cleaning windows when he sees a Minnie figure in the window] Aw, Minnie.
[laughs]


Aquamania (1961)
Goofy, Jr.: Where've you been, pop?
Goofy: Oh, just parkin' the car, son!


Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance (2012) (VG)
[Maleficent and Pete are holding Queen Minnie captive as Mickey, Donald and Goofy come to her aid]
Donald Duck: Pete, you big thug!
Pete: [laughing] "Thug" works for me. We all got a role to play, right?
Goofy: Gawrsh, at least he's honest, in a dishonest way.


The Whalers (1938)
Goofy: [after the whale has destroyed the ship, Goofy emerges from the wreckage] Here he is! Ha ha!
[Pulls out a fish]
Goofy: Gosh, he must've shrunk.


How to Hook Up Your Home Theater (2007)
Narrator: Selecting the proper television is of utmost importance, and there are many models from which to choose.
[Goofy stops in front of a large television to his left; his cart rolls slowly to a stop against something just off-screen]
Narrator: Ahem... A conservatively-sized unit is the most prudent selection.
[Goofy looks to the right, and sees an even larger television, many times taller than the stack of items in his cart]
Goofy: [to the giant TV] I... love you.
[Goofy hugs against the gigantic television screen]


Goofy Gymnastics (1949)
Narrator: [as the record falls onto the record player] Welcome to the super dynamic muscle, tissue, figure and body-building company at faith firmly. For our number one exercise, suppose we try the barbell.
Narrator: [Goofy places himself standing above and facing the barbell] Feet in position.
Narrator: [Goofy follows all instructions] One, inhale. Two, bend down.
[Goofy suddenly feels pain in his hind end]
Narrator: Three, flex the knees. Four grip firmly with both hands. And five, we lift.
[Goofy makes his first move to lift the barbell only to fall to the floor. Then he steps back up with his feet on the handle and continues to struggle in lifting the barbell, causing the spots on his caveman suit to pop off. Suddenly, the weights collapse and the handle lands on his fingers]
Goofy: Whoa.
[Pulls his fingers out from the pressure of the handle]
Narrator: One, two, three. One, two, three.
Goofy: [Fixes the barbells and accidentally drops the other one on his foot] Ow.
[Attempts to lift the barbell from behind his back which causes him to fall forward and have the barbell roll over his back and hit the back of his head. Goofy looks back at the barbell, moves his feet closer to him, and rolls over to try lifitng the barbell with his feet, only to have the weights close in on his hands and feet like two magnets. Goofy notices his hands and feet trapped in the barbells. Then he rolls himself back, forth, and back again until he lifts his hind end high up and moves it back and forth. Suddenly Goofy falls forward and starts rolling on the barbells like wheels with his workout suit falling over his head. With his head cover by the suit, Goofy turns his head back and forth and shakes the suit off his head. Then he rolls onto a board formed like a ramp. At the high end of the board, Goofy falls off with the end of the board giving his rear one smack which causes him to flip, freeing his hands and feet from the barbells. Goofy also lands his feet on the floor and is finally lifting the barbell over his head]


Father's Lion (1952)
Goofy, Jr.: Daddy?
Goofy: [sleepily] Yeah?
Goofy, Jr.: Do lions sleep in sleeping bags?
Goofy: Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure... Lion, schmion...


"House of Mouse: Big Bad Wolf Daddy (#1.2)" (2001)
Goofy: Hi. I'm waiter and I'll be your Goofy tonight. Now, let me tell you our specials, we have Breadknobs and Fishsticks, Cruella De Veal, Peg-Leg Pizza, Never Never Lamb, Stromboli Ravioli and Pocahummus.


The Big Wash (1948)
Goofy: [singing; repeated lines] I'm a-gonna wash Dolores. She's a-gonna look ga-lorious.
[hums]


Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)
[the Toons gather around Judge Doom's remains]
Mickey Mouse: Gosh, I wonder who he really was?
Bugs Bunny: I'll tell you one thing, Doc. He weren't no rabbit.
Daffy Duck: Or a duck.
Goofy: Or a dog.
Pinocchio: Or a little wooden boy.
Big Bad Wolf: Or a... sheep.
Woody Woodpecker: Or a woodpecker.
Sylvester: Or a pussy.


African Diary (1945)
Goofy: [Goofy takes aim at the rhino charging at him with his shotgun, trembling] It was either him or me...
[Goofy pulls the trigger only to find out the shotgun wasn't loaded]
Goofy: ... it was ME!
[the rhino swings Goofy by his shotgun with his horn and flings him off into the distance]


"Goof Troop: Calling All Goofs (#1.54)" (1992)
Goofy: [trying to hang up a black and white portrait of the family] If I can't see the family in living color, black and white's better than nothing.


"Mickey Mouse: Sleepwalkin' (#1.14)" (2013)
[Goofy has lead Mickey through town while sleepwalking. At the end, they return to Goofy's home where Mickey only gets a few seconds of sleep before the alarm clock goes off]
Goofy: [waking up] Wow! I slept great! I feel like I can run a marathon! What do you say, Mick? C'mon!
Mickey Mouse: [crying out] Not again!
[screams while running out of the house]
Goofy: [guffaws] Yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about! Now wait for me!


For Whom the Bulls Toil (1953)
[Goofy has been dressed up in a matador outfit and goes out into a bullring. He sees a newspaper headline showing him, reading "El Goof Matador"]
Goofy: Matador? Hmm. A bullfighter?
[suddenly, the truth hits him; shocked]
Goofy: A fighter of the bulls? *Me*? Oh, no!
[he runs from the ring - and into the bull stable]


Ye Olden Days (1933)
King: On my command, you'll give thy hand and wedlock to yon prince.
Goofy: [guffaws] I know you'll learn to love me.
[kisses Minnie]
Minnie Mouse: [slapping Goofy] Never! Never! Never!


"Mickey Mouse: Tapped Out (#1.16)" (2014)
Pete: [in response to the crowd booing him] Oh, yeah? Well, which one of yas wants to come up here and take on the champ?
[crowd silences in fears]
Goofy: Hey! Hey man! I'll tell ya who...
[points to Mickey]
Goofy: This guy!
[chuckles as he brings Mickey forward]
Pete: [pointing at Mickey] You?
Mickey Mouse: [in fear] N-n-n-n-no.
[Mickey backs away, but Goofy blocks his escape]
Goofy: Sure you do, Mick. Why, you was just telling me how much you'd like to teach him a lesson. Remember?
Mickey Mouse: [in fear] Uh, well, uh, I um...
Goofy: [to Pete] He said he was gonna give you one of these.
Mickey Mouse: No!
Goofy: Some this and this. And... lights out!
Pete: Might I suggest this!
[as he grabs Goofy, uses him as a pogo stick, and launches him bouncing around the wrestling stadium until he landed on the wrestling mat]


"Goof Troop: Goofin' Up the Social Ladder (#2.10)" (1992)
Peg Pete: [after Goofy unwittingly helps her gain entry to an elite club] Sprinklers? That's it!
[kisses Goofy firmly on the lips]
Peg Pete: Oh, Goofy, you're coming with me!
Goofy: [to Camera] Passionate, isn't she?
[chuckles, then is grabbed]


"House of Mouse: Pluto Saves the Day (#1.13)" (2001)
[Pete is dressed as Snow White and trying to give Goofy a sleeping apple]
Pete: [falsetto] Oh, Goofy! I have a delicious apple for you.
Goofy: No, thanks. Ma said never to take fruit from a stranger.
Pete: But I'm Snow White.
Goofy: Yeah? Then who's that?
[points to the real Snow White sitting at her table]
Pete: Uh, well, y'know, uh... An apple a day keeps the doc away.
Goofy: [holding up the dwarf Doc] But I like Doc.
Pete: [getting angry; normal voice] Just eat this apple!
Goofy: Okay, Snow. Betcha Prince Charmin' never saw this side of ya before the kiss.
[Pete shoves the apple into Goofy's mouth]


"Goof Troop: For Pete's Sake (#1.44)" (1992)
[Goofy tries to write Pete a sorry letter]
Goofy: How many R's are there in Pete? Hmm. I'll just write it sloppy so the spelling don't show.


"Mickey Mouse: Good Sports (#3.20)" (2016)
Goofy: But what about BAD SPORTSMANSHIP?


Symphony Hour (1942)
Mickey Mouse: Where's Goofy? Where are the instruments? GOOFY!
[Echoes]
Goofy: I'M COMI-I-I-I-ING!