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Quotes for
Callisto (Character)
from "Xena: Warrior Princess" (1995)

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"Xena: Warrior Princess: Return of Callisto (#2.5)" (1996)
Callisto: I never drink intoxicants, Theodorus. I like to experience life in all its agonizing glory. I don't want to dull the sensation for a second.

Callisto: [Xena and Callisto have fallen into quick sound] We're both going to die Xena!... How wonderful, we can spend the rest of eternity in Tartarus together.
Xena: ...Always the optimist.

Callisto: You're not falling in love with me, are you?
Theodorus: ...Well what if I was?
Callisto: I'd have to kill you.

Callisto: I say, before I kill you, I'm going to make you squeal like a pig, you fat pathetic piece of dung.

Callisto: Love is a trick that nature plays to get us to reproduce.

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Maternal Instincts (#3.11)" (1998)
Callisto: [Hunting down the children] Oh come now this won't hurt... much.

Callisto: Hurts, doesn't it? Losing your family. Rips out your heart, your guts, your feelings. All that's left is the pain, right?
Callisto: Welcome to the club.
[Callisto fires a bolt at Xena]

Callisto: [as Xena draws her sword on her] Really, Xena? Is that any way to greet an old friend?
Callisto: Especially considering the warm welcome I just gave you!

Callisto: [as Xena fights Callisto in the cave] You'll trap us both! That's your plan, to trap me here while my pain keeps growing and growing and you die and yours ends!
Xena: You're wrong, Callisto! You let your pain kill you years ago... I'm gonna live with mine!
[Xena escapes and Callisto screams as the cave crumbles on top of her]

Callisto: [Callisto enters the Ixion caves looking for Hope] Hope?
Callisto: Hope? Are you here?
[she finds Hope on the ground, weak from killing Kaleipus]
Callisto: Hope! What's happened?
Hope: Uh, that half-assed old man! He caught me coming for Solan.

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Sacrifice II (#3.22)" (1998)
Callisto: [as Gabrielle is reunited with her murderous daughter] Oh, mother and child reunion... I'm all misty eyed.

Xena: Let me guess: things didn't work out with Hope quite the way you expected.
Callisto: No, actually the sight of her and Ares rolling around like weasels made me sick.
Gabrielle: Hope and Ares?
Callisto: Oh yes, Gabrielle, it seems your daughter is in heat.

Callisto: Try not to die before doing me first, or I'll make Gabrielle wish you had. How's that for incentive.

Callisto: I never thought I'd feel so good again! Seeing poor, dear Gabrielle sacrifice herself makes it all worthwhile. It finally gives me a reason for living, and I have you to thank for it, Xena!
[Angry Xena kills her]

Hope: [hiding in Ares' temple] A temple to a lesser God. Changes are in order...
Callisto: [inside the temple, Callisto blasts the head off a statue of Ares; she glees] I *always* wanted to do that!
Ares: [appears suddenly] Tell me how you really feel, Callisto!

"Xena: Warrior Princess: A Necessary Evil (#2.14)" (1997)
Xena: Callisto, I didn't come here for this!
[meaning "to fight"]
Callisto: Well, then... you shouldn't have come at all.

Callisto: [to a rat, she has picked up] No, no, no - relax my fur little friend. No you're not dinner. That's boring part of immortality, no your defiantly not food. You're my little Hercules. Hercules trapped me in this little resort and I owe him a lot. I'm planning on paying him back for kindness, soon. Soon,
[Lets the rat go]
Callisto: So, run away like a good little Hercules. Run away. Run away. Run away
[Stabs it and laughs]
Callisto: Very soon.

Callisto: Such a pretty day for a blood bath.

Callisto: How've you been? Any new husbands since the last one I killed?

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Sacrifice (#3.21)" (1998)
Callisto: Welcome to my world... now get ready to leave it.

Callisto: [as Xena thrusts a sword through her] Ouch! Don't do that!

Callisto: [appears in a hidden cave] Oh, Xena, come on! I know you're here. Still trying to stop me, even though I'm doing you a favor...
Xena: [Xena flips down over to Callisto] You can do me a favor by handing over Hope!
Callisto: Oh, you figured it out, did you? Well, no can do! She's not quite up to snuff at the moment. She's cocooned, helpless. She needs her Auntie Callisto. And you would just run her through...
Xena: That's the idea!
Callisto: Yeah, well, I can't let it happen! See, I have plans for her. Big plans!
Xena: [Xena draws her sword] Well, forget about them!
[Callisto draws her sword]
Xena: And hand over that monster!
[Xena charges at Callisto and they fight]

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Callisto (#1.22)" (1996)
Xena: Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to you without a fair trial.
Callisto: You know, there used to be a little respect mixed up in my hatred for you... but not anymore. Your petty scruples are embarrassing. As a villian, you were awesome. As a hero, you're a sentimental fool.

Callisto: The sight, just the *sight*, of Xena, Warrior Princess arguing on *my* behalf amuses me, so let me tell you. Let me answer your question about what I'd do if you let me go. You let me go, and I'll dedicate my life to killing everything you love. Your friends, your family, your reputation - even your horse. I'm being so honest with you, because the idea of your pity is worse than death for me. You see, you created a monster with integrity, Xena. Scary, isn't it?

Callisto: [Fighting Xena for the first time] I'm good! As good as you, and why not? You made me!
Xena: [the two warrior women proceed to fight each other] It was you who shot me with that poison dart?
Callisto: Yes, you see, it left me free to revive your reputation as a wanted killer of women and children.
Xena: I never killed women and children!
Callisto: Well, you have now!
[They continue crossing swords]
Xena: What did you when you said I made you?
Callisto: Do you remember Cirra?
[Callisto attacks Xena one more time before jumping on her horse and riding away]

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Seeds of Faith (#5.9)" (2000)
Xena: [to angel Callisto] What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be floating on a cloud someplace...
Callisto: [smiles] Thanks to you. You saved me from an eternity in Hell and for that I owe you my soul.
Xena: You don't owe me anything...
Callisto: I've been purified by the waters of Heaven and yet, still all you see in me is a black heart.
Xena: I know that the old Callisto is dead but she's alive in my memory.
Xena: Don't expect too much from me.
Callisto: I've come here to ask you not to interfere with Eli. He'll handle Ares on his own terms.
Xena: Ares' army's about to march on Pylos. Eli thinks he can stop them with a kind word. He can't. All I'm gonna do is give him a fighting chance.
Callisto: Eli has a destiny to fulfill. He's brought hope to the world and if that's to survive, he's gonna have to face this challenge alone...
[Callisto disappears]

Callisto: The new world can only be built on the foundation of the old one. The order of the Gods must fall. And you Eli, are the hammer.
Callisto: There is no reason to be afraid. Your faith is stronger than any who have come before you.
Eli: Until now...
Callisto: You said it yourself. "All fear is the fear of loss and only through that fear can we truly love." You wouldn't have been chosen if you weren't afraid.
[Eli bows his head. Callisto appears beside him and kisses his cheek]
Callisto: Remember... in everything you do we are always with you.
[Eli starts to cry and Callisto disappears]

Callisto: Xena, my time has come to be reincarnated into the mortal world and the body that will bear my spirit has been ordained.
Callisto: I can think of no greater mother than you...
Xena: It was you all along?
Xena: You gave me this child?
Callisto: In the past, I destroyed your life Xena.
Xena: [on the verge of tears] And I destroyed yours...
Xena: Maybe it's time that we both gave back what we once took from each other.
[Callisto touches Xena's stomach becomes the soul of the baby. A tear moves down Xena's face]
Eli: [as an angel] Love is the way.
[he disappears]

"Xena: Warrior Princess: The Bitter Suite (#3.12)" (1998)
Callisto: Absorb thyself in this Great Sea of the waters of life. Dive deep in it until thou has lost thyself. And having lost thyself, then thou shall find thyself again. Even as it is written, she had her dwelling in the Great Sea, and was a fish therein.

Callisto: [singing to Xena] Did that fill you with glee, to kill your little friend? Did that ease your suffering, or bring it to an end? Let go... All of your anger would poison you yet, unless you can just let go...

"Xena: Warrior Princess: Fallen Angel (#5.1)" (1999)
Callisto: Love is the way.