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Quotes for
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins (Character)
from "The Sweeney" (1975)

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"The Sweeney: Pay Off (#3.10)" (1976)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Who was your informant?
Det. Sgt. George Carter: Eddie Glass.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Did Millan... put Glass in the frame, if you'll forgive the pun.

[an armed robbery is taking place in the middle of a wood. Nearby, several Sweeney cars are racing to the scene, but they are lost. They stop to consult a map]
DS Tom Daniels: Wasn't it "turn left" two miles back, Guv?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Ask Marco Polo here.
[Vaughton looks at a map]
Vaughton: We turned here, right? Right!
DS Tom Daniels: No, we should have turned there. Twit!
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: How can we lose a van that...
[a loud bang is heard in the distance]
DS Tom Daniels: [ironically] We've found it.
[they race back to their cars and screech off into the distance]

[Regan is ordering another round of drinks]
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Same again, Guv?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: No, no. I must be off. I've got this cold to nurse.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: [to barmaid] Same again - but no sherry this time.

[Haskins is asking Carter about Shirley Glass]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Now I don't want to pry but just what is your relationship with this girl?
Det. Sgt. George Carter: [embarrassed] Well it's... purely heterosexual...
[Haskins gives Carter a wry look]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Are you planning to see her again?
Det. Sgt. George Carter: [eagerly] I 'ope so!


"The Sweeney: Faces (#2.2)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: I've just been with the Assistant Commissioner.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: [smirking] Not, I trust, in the biblical sense!

[Carter and some of the other Squad members are trying to arrest Tober's gang]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: [to Regan] Put a stop to that! I won't have members of my team brawling in public.


"The Sweeney: Thou Shalt Not Kill (#2.13)" (1975)
[Haskins arrives on the scene. Wands is dead and Monks is cradling him in his arms]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: How did it happen?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: It happened the minute you gave in to them. If you'd have ordered us to fire when you had the chance, Dowland would still be alive, that girl's face wouldn't be scarred for life, a policeman wouldn't have been smashed up - and more important, the chances of a villain ever taking hostages again would be a lot less than they're gonna be now.

[looking at Wands' body]
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: This guy Wands was always gonna take a piece of the world with him.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Well he certainly took out more than he left in.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: He was handed it on a plate. *We* gave him his inch... and he took his mile.


"The Sweeney: Victims (#4.13)" (1978)
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: What's wrong, Frank?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: How d'you mean?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: You. You're falling part.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Rubbish!
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: It's not rubbish. You're walking through it. Is there something wrong?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: I've got a lot on.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Nah. There's more to it than that.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Look, I've got a Board coming up. Taylor's been shot. Willoughby's sick. You know how busy we are.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: And...
[long pause]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: [reluctantly] And Doreen's disappeared.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: What? You think she's been abducted?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: No. It's been going on for some time - months.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Well, why didn't you say?
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: It's not exactly the sort of thing you go shouting from the rooftops, is it? You know: "Haskins, the one with the dodgy wife".
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Well, what are you going to do?
[Haskins shakes his head in desperation and walks off]


"The Sweeney: Hit and Run (#2.5)" (1975)
[Following a tip-off, Regan and Carter have just spent a freezing night waiting for a robbery to take place in Sudbury, north west London, only to learn that it actually happened in Sunbury, south west London]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Just one letter out - or about eighteen miles as the crow flies.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Stupid pratt.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Your snout either needs elocution lessons or his ears syringing.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: With sulphuric acid!


"The Sweeney: Jack or Knave (#4.14)" (1978)
[Last lines of the final episode, as Regan disappears in a taxi, vowing to quit the force]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: He'll be back. He needs the job like an alcoholic needs booze.
Det. Sgt. George Carter: [sarcastically] Yeah?


"The Sweeney: Thin Ice (#1.3)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: I had an electronic surveillance device on test. It's disappeared. Matthews said you took it.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Yeah, that's right, guv. I locked it on the bottom of Moose's Range Rover.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Oh, all right. Where's the Range Rover now?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Well that's the point. It's disappeared. Right here.
[Regan points at a spot on a map]
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: With my ESD?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: That's right, guv.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: You lost my ESD? Have you any idea how much those things cost?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Wait a minute. I haven't lost it, guv'nor. It lost itself. After all, it's supposed to be unlosable. That's the whole point of the machine, isn't it? Gives off these little bleeps so you can tell where it's going.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: It cost a fortune.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Look, we were asked to evaluate it. Well, I just evaluated it. In fact, I can give you my considered verdict: it's useless. We've lost the Moose, and the dog, and the machine.


"The Sweeney: Loving Arms (#3.11)" (1976)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: I'll go round the back.
[Haskins walks off]
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Huh! Round-the-back Haskins strikes again!


"The Sweeney: Abduction (#1.13)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Jack, I didn't understand.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: At least you listened.


"The Sweeney: Taste of Fear (#3.5)" (1976)
[Jack is telling Haskins that he failed to capture Tim Cook]
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: George Carter got stabbed.
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Stabbed?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: With a fork...
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Anyone eating with it at the time ?


"The Sweeney: Ringer (#1.1)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: Who the hell do you think you're talking to, Regan?
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: Do you want me to answer that?


"The Sweeney: The Placer (#1.7)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: You were involved in a robbery.
Det. Insp. Jack Regan: How else am I expected to get close? Put a small ad in Villains News?


"The Sweeney: Contact Breaker (#1.12)" (1975)
Det. Chief Insp. Frank Haskins: You know something, Jack, there's a hole in your head as big as the hole in the bank vault.