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Quotes for
Insp. Harvey Leek (Character)
from "Nash Bridges" (1996)

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"Nash Bridges: Sniper (#3.7)" (1997)
Frankie: Excuse me, what are you doing?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Trying to set this guy free.
Frankie: Mr. Williams pays seventy-five dollars an hour to be chained up like that.

Insp. Harvey Leek: I'm curious now - did you clap when Bambi's mom bought it?

Insp. Evan Cortez: So, Harv', you have any Halloween plans?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Nah, nothin' baby beyond a frozen pizza and Sci-Fi channel.

"Nash Bridges: Inside Out (#2.14)" (1997)
Insp. Bryn Carson: So, ah, Harv', how are things going with Bonnie? Any progress?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ah, I don't know. She's down on my job 'n' down on my love for The Grateful Dead, she talks about Ross Perot just to piss me off.

Insp. Harvey Leek: Hey! Somebody want to let us out of here? We're police officers - we don't belong here!
[prisoners shout and laugh]
Insp. Joe Dominguez: Shut up! That's not an asset in here!
[as they sit in the hole in prison]

Insp. Joe Dominguez: Harvey?
[as they sit in the dark in the hole in prison]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Hey, Joe. We gotta get out of here.
Insp. Joe Dominguez: No kidding. One ittle problem: it's a maximum security prison, remember?
Insp. Harvey Leek: I'm claustrophobic, remember?
Insp. Joe Dominguez: Hey, don't worry, they'll come back. They got to come back to kill us.
Insp. Harvey Leek: That's comforting.

"Nash Bridges: Blackout (#3.5)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Now, Larson had contacted you because somebody contacted him about a contract killing, you went undercover as Teddy Malone four days ago, that's the last we heard of you.
Insp. Nash Bridges: Why would I drop out of sight for four days? Not communicate with anybody.
Insp. Joe Dominguez: That we don't know.
Insp. Nash Bridges: Well, hell, that's not like me.
Insp. Harvey Leek: We agree.
Insp. Nash Bridges: Well, damnit, don't let me do that no more!

Insp. Harvey Leek: She could fight a war all by herself.
[as they both investigate the stuff on Michelle's desk after she walks away from it]
Insp. Evan Cortez: Look at this stuff, this isn't standard polcie-issue, is it?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Nah, too high-tech. Oh, this is very Emma Peel of her. Remember 'The Avengers', that TV show? Damn you're young.
[after Evan looks at him confused]
Insp. Evan Cortez: I want that woman, she is extremely hot.
Insp. Harvey Leek: No, no - tread very gently on that stuff.
Insp. Evan Cortez: Why you say that?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Using that kind of language when talking about a fellow police officer... you got to be careful these days.
Insp. Evan Cortez: Yeah, but what if she would like it.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Yeah, yeah, all I'm saying is don't let anybody else hear that because people file lawsuits for less effort.
Insp. Evan Cortez: All I'm saying is that first time I saw that woman I wanted to kiss the nape of her neck, I wanted to devour her flesh, I wanted to do the wild thing with her, possibly introduce her to Mr. Happy if you know what I'm talking about.
Insp. Harvey Leek: You been taking those testosterone supplements?

Insp. Michelle Chan: Oh, and, ah, guys, I almost forgot: I wanted to weight in on your little work discussion. You know, I don't mind frank sexual talk in the office as long as it's not directly concerning me. And, ah, just for your information: if a co-worker ever tries to intoruce me to 'Mr. Happy', I'll very quickly make him into Mr. Unhappy. Good-bye.
Insp. Evan Cortez: So you think I still got a chance with her?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Unless she gets blown up and loses her memory, no.

"Nash Bridges: Missing Key (#5.20)" (2000)
Insp. Harvey Leek: She blew me off in favor of the potato salad.

Insp. Harvey Leek: Oh, very little sleep last night, brother.
Evan Cortez: Oh, why is that?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Heidi came back to the place; wild animal sex all night long, barely got my cloths on and made it to work. I don't care though: what ever happens today, last night was so rivid.
Evan Cortez: Harvey, I-I feel so used.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Used and abused, brother. How many women have I missed out on by not going to Pot Luck's?

Evan Cortez: Harvey, so, ah, what did she want?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Oh, the long and short of it buddy is that our one night together convinced her she's gay, thanks for asking.

"Nash Bridges: The Messenger (#6.9)" (2000)
Insp. Antwon Babcock: Why would she take naked pictures of herself?
[seeing naked pictures of a woman accidently given to Harvey]
Insp. Harvey Leek: I don't care. In my view it was the right decision.

Insp. Harvey Leek: Listen: give me two minutes - I'll do something wonderful for you some day.

Insp. Harvey Leek: There is a God.
Insp. Antwon Babcock: Yeah, yeah, and he's gonna get you.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Doubtful, doubtful.

"Nash Bridges: Hide and Seek (#4.17)" (1999)
Nash Bridges: Ah, what about the governor's phone records and credit cards? Did you get 'em?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ahhh, yeah.
[with Caitlin standing behind him]
Nash Bridges: Ah, its Caitlin - she's standing right there, isn't she?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Yes.
Nash Bridges: Can you say anything but yet?
Insp. Harvey Leek: No.

Caitlin Cross: Harvey. Harvey, Harvey, Harvey, Harvey. You know, you just might as well tell me what's going on because I'm going to find out anyway.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Well...
Caitlin Cross: Come on, come on - it's what I do. Find things out.
Insp. Harvey Leek: It raises all sorts of loyalty issues for me, Caitlin; I don't like to be in the middle of this, okay?
Caitlin Cross: Fine. Why don't you just come on over to my side?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Very enticing, but thanks all the same.

"Nash Bridges: One Flew Over the Cuda's Nest (#3.4)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: You're gonna love this: the boys from Psych services were transfering our friend Dr. Watson to the coco ward but they decided to stop and get milk shakes, and Watson bolted; he escaped.
Insp. Nash Bridges: That's good.
Insp. Harvey Leek: They did get their milk shakes though.

Insp. Harvey Leek: There's no way I could have scored a 540. Not unless... Godless universe.

"Nash Bridges: Promised Land (#2.11)" (1996)
Insp. Harvey Leek: I'm not running your prints through the F.B.I.; I got people for that.

Insp. Harvey Leek: Here's what throws me: A guy like Evan goes on a security-duty and spends two minutes schmoozing with Lisa Bridges - Nash's ex - Nash Bridges, acting lieutenant of S.I.U. and next thing you know he's got a full-on romance going on with her.
Shrink: A full-on romance?
[off screen]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Yeah, that's what I hear.
Shrink: Sounds like you're envious.
[off screen]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Envious? No. You know that scene in Star Wars where that sand creature takes a thousand years to digest a guy? That's humane compared to what Nash would do if he caught Evan sleeping with his ex.

"Nash Bridges: Frisco Blues (#4.23)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: So, you married or...
Riley Parker: No.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Dating?
Riley Parker: No, why? Gonna ask me out on a date or something?
Insp. Harvey Leek: No, sorry, I was just making conversation.
Riley Parker: So, what about you - divorced?
Insp. Harvey Leek: What? Why would you think that?
Riley Parker: Oh, I don't know. Just, ah, have a look about you.

Riley Parker: Who you calling?
[after they open a door and let out a bunch of pigs]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Bacon back up.

"Nash Bridges: Kill Switch (#5.10)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ronnie, we need the small lock pick.
Officer Ronnie: Here you go.
[handing Harvey a large and thick crowbar]

Insp. Harvey Leek: He's got an air-tight alibi.
[after finding a suspect dead in a chair]

"Nash Bridges: Boomtown (#4.18)" (1999)
Evan Cortez: Why does she have to be naked?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ha! That's a new complaint!

Evan Cortez: All right, Harv', after you.
[as they get ready with firearms drawn to enter a suspects place]
Insp. Harvey Leek: That's okay, I went first last time.
Evan Cortez: No, no, no, I... all right, Harv', if anything happens to me, this is the last time I'm going first.
Insp. Harvey Leek: I'm right behind ya.

"Nash Bridges: Girl Trouble (#5.4)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Huh, Tommy, what happened here? Your normal loan-sharking, arsen-for-hire gigs, they all dry up?
Tommy Orlando: I got nothing to say to you, man.
Caitlin Cross: Where's the food from?
Tommy Orlando: Who knows. I don't eat Chinese.
Caitlin Cross: Huh, well you're tough. Ronnie, ah, why don't you take Mr. Orlando here to jail. Book him on felony narcotics possession, felony weapons possession and, ah, attempted murder of a polcie officer.
Officer Ronnie: My pleasure. Let's go.
[turning the handcuffed Orlando around]
Caitlin Cross: See you in about fifteen years. Maybe then you won't be so tough.

Caitlin Cross: What the hell is that?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Disco Inferno! You remember? The Trampps? Yeah, Disco Inferno. do you hear that? I maintain that the energy underneath that melody is exactly the same as the energy underneath some of Jerry's work during the Rolling Stones period. Except for the disco part.
[casually drinking coffee as Caitlin cough from the smoke]
Caitlin Cross: Yeah, I understand. Where the hell is it coming from?
Insp. Harvey Leek: I don't know. If you figure it out, tell us.

"Nash Bridges: Danger Zone (#3.20)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: I'll break out the terrorist directory.
Insp. Nash Bridges: Yeah, well make sure you look under the really, really, really bad listings.

Insp. Harvey Leek: I had a dream last night.
Insp. Evan Cortez: OH yeah?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Guess it was more of a nightmare, really.
Insp. Evan Cortez: Really, what about?
Insp. Harvey Leek: You and Cassidy were stranded on this desert island.
Insp. Evan Cortez: Now, how could that possibly be a nightmare?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Wait, wait, I didn't get to the good part. You get rescued by a PT boat. Guess who's drivin'?
Insp. Evan Cortez: Who?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ensign Nash Bridges; he's carrying a big ol' machete. He wasnt' carvin' coconuts, if you know what I mean.

"Nash Bridges: Cuda Grace (#3.18)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Is that actual cleavage I'm seeing there?
Insp. Evan Cortez: Yes, it is.
[dressed up liek a girl]

"Nash Bridges: Bear Trap (#6.11)" (2001)
Insp. Harvey Leek: What the hell is he doing?
[as Jack climbs a tree]
Joe Dominguez: I don't know, Harv', haven't you ever had the urge to climb a tree?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Not lately, no.

"Nash Bridges: Most Wanted (#3.9)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: What does it say about the state of the world when I can't get a date on Friday but Martin Brown has a hundred and thirteen perfumed letters.
[speaking of an escaped prisoner's mail]

"Nash Bridges: High Society (#5.5)" (1999)
Det. Jake Cage: All right, ah, he rain in Spain falls mainly on my head.
[testing out the wire Harvey has planted on him]
Insp. Harvey Leek: My Fair Lady. I love that movie.
Det. Jake Cage: What?
Insp. Harvey Leek: You know, the rain in Spain, My Fair Lady?
Det. Jake Cage: No out of status here, The Aristocats.

"Nash Bridges: Dirty Tricks (#3.12)" (1997)
Insp. Evan Cortez: Somebody remind me: is this our second or third war with the British?
[as he and the team arm up]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Third. Last time was Flintlocks and powdered wigs; you'd think they would have learned.

"Nash Bridges: The Web (#2.16)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: I love doughnuts. One of the main attractions to becoming a cop.

"Nash Bridges: Curveball (#5.6)" (1999)
Evan Cortez: Man, extremely cute.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Isn't he?
Evan Cortez: No, I meant your baby sitter.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Robin? You touch her, you're dead. I'm serious.
[as Evan laughs]

"Nash Bridges: Crash and Burn (#4.22)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Somebody make sure that girl is dead!

"Nash Bridges: Sacraments (#3.23)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Please, no gifts, no crying.
[with sarcasm]

"Nash Bridges: Shake, Rattle & Roll (#3.3)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: This is beautiful - the guy's gonna repeat the whole deal on tape for us. It's too easy, it's criminal; I actually feel kind of guilty.
Insp. Nash Bridges: You'll get over it.

"Nash Bridges: Out of Chicago (#2.20)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Let's hope our next stake out is Jenny McCarthy's.
Insp. Evan Cortez: I wish.

"Nash Bridges: Trackdown (#2.5)" (1996)
Insp. Harvey Leek: There's a very good reason you didn't recognize the shell casing: it's very rare and made in limited-run by a small German firm and Interpol confirms this is the Monk's bullet du jour.

"Nash Bridges: Hard Cell (#5.19)" (2000)
Evan Cortez: Okay guys, look - we're willing to pre-arrange twenty-four conjical visists; that's two per month.
Insp. Harvey Leek: More than most married couples get on the outside.

"Nash Bridges: Impostors (#4.2)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: I'll beat the bushes.

"Nash Bridges: Found Money (#3.11)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: You know, it could just be, Evan, that she and I were made for each other. I often wondered if she was the one that got away.
[speaking of his new girlfriend released from prison]
Insp. Evan Cortez: No, Harv', she was the one that was sent away.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ha, ha, ha, I'll have to owe you a smart-ass retort.

"Nash Bridges: Knockout (#2.17)" (1997)
Insp. Harvey Leek: She's a black widow, man.
Insp. Evan Cortez: I can change her, Harv', I know I can.

"Nash Bridges: Line of Sight (#5.17)" (2000)
Insp. Harvey Leek: What if they don't crack?
Nash Bridges: Ah, you throw a life vest to a bunch of drowning morons, they'll give up their own mother.

"Nash Bridges: Trade Off (#5.2)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Say hey, going shopping?
Carl Hanover: Who the hell are you?
Insp. Evan Cortez: I'm a cop. Who are you?
Carl Hanover: Jack. Va-va-valen.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Va-va-valen what?
[mocking the suspect]
Carl Hanover: Valenoppenstein.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Valenoppenstein. Is that Russian?
Carl Hanover: No, it's Lithuanianberg.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Oh, I wasn't aware there was a Lithuanianberg.
Insp. Evan Cortez: That's somewhere between Franceland and Hollandsville.

"Nash Bridges: Smash and Grab (#5.3)" (1999)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Take Jerry to a rock concert? I don't want him breathing the air in there, man.

"Nash Bridges: Downtime (#3.15)" (1998)
Loretta Bettina: Leeks! Leeks! Where's Leeks?
Insp. Harvey Leek: Ah, that would be Leek, Richey. No "S".

"Nash Bridges: Blow Out (#6.8)" (2000)
Eldon Sistrunk: I was rehabilitated in prison. I'm a different man, now.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Oh, so if I ask yo ua few questions you're not going to break anything, huh? 'cause my new partner - he doesn't go for that, Eldon.

"Nash Bridges: Patriots (#3.17)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Problem.
Insp. Nash Bridges: I don't like problems.
[over his cellphone]
Insp. Harvey Leek: Still, they exist.

"Nash Bridges: Touchdown (#3.22)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: Why, Nash, you read my floppy disk.

"Nash Bridges: Apocalypse Nash (#4.5)" (1998)
Insp. Harvey Leek: That looks suspicious as hell.
[to Evan after they see a shadow quickly pass curtains in a house]

"Nash Bridges: Hit and Run (#5.15)" (2000)
Vanessa Swan: So, you're not only a dead-head, you're a bleeding-heart liberal.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Less liberal, more philisophical. My heart only bleeds for Jerry.
[refering to Jerry Garcia]

"Nash Bridges: Internal Affairs (#2.1)" (1996)
Cassidy Bridges: So, Evan, when you actually catch a thief, how can you tel if he's actually telling the truth?
Insp. Evan Cortez: Ah, I don't know, I guess it comes from experience, wouldn't you say, Harv'? when you learn to read body language, you know, the look in somebody's eye, the tone of their voice, the small gesture, that kind of thing... give a lot away.
Insp. Harvey Leek: Oh, yeah. Yeah, sometimes the signals are so obvious you'd have to be a fool to miss 'em.
[as Evan is oblivious to the strong signals of attraction Cassidy is sending]