Dexter Morgan
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Quotes for
Dexter Morgan (Character)
from "Dexter" (2006)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
"Dexter: Dexter (#1.1)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: [last lines of the episode; voiceover about the doll parts in his freezeR] I suppose I should be upset, even feel violated, but I'm not. No, in fact, I think this is a friendly message, like "Hey, wanna play?" and yes, I want to play. I really, really do.

Dexter Morgan: The only real question I have is why in a building full of cops, all supposedly with a keen insight to the human soul, is Doakes the only one who gets the creep from me.

Lt. Maria Laguerta: So then he must have already had the head with him in the front seat. Huh, that's weird. Why would he keep it there?
Dexter Morgan: I don't know. So he could use a carpool lane

Dexter Morgan: Blood. Sometimes it sets my teeth on edge, other times it helps me control the chaos.

Dexter Morgan: Harry and Dorris Morgan did a wonderful job raising me. But they're both dead now. I didn't kill them. Honest.

Sergeant Doakes: You give me the fucking creeps, you know that Dexter?
Dexter Morgan: Yeah, I know, sorry about that.

Records Supervisor: You have a morbid sense of fun.
Dexter Morgan: That's probably true...

Dexter Morgan: No blood. No sticky, hot, messy, awful blood; no blood at all. Why hadn't I thought of that? No blood. What a beautiful idea!

Dexter Morgan: Needless to say I have some unusual habits, yet all these socially acceptable people can't wait to pick up hammers and smash their food to bits. Normal people are so hostile.

Dexter Morgan: [as killer adverts his eyes from dead bodies] Look! Or I will cut your eyelids right off your face.

Dexter Morgan: Harry was a great cop here in Miami. He taught me how to think like one; he taught me how to cover my tracks. I'm a very neat monster.

Dexter Morgan: People fake a lot of human interactions, but I feel like I fake them all, and I fake them very well. That's my burden, I guess.

Dexter Morgan: There's something strange and disarming about looking at a homicide scene in the daylight of Miami. It makes the most grotesque killings look staged, like you're in a new and daring section of Disney World: Dahmerland!

Mike Donovan: [about killing the boys] I couldn't help myself. I couldn't. Please, you have to understand.
Dexter Morgan: Trust me, I definitely understand. See, I can't help myself either. But children - I could never do that. Not like you. Never, ever kids.
Mike Donovan: Why?
Dexter Morgan: I have standards.

Dexter Morgan: She's the only person in the world who loves me. I think that's nice. I don't have feeling about anything, but if I could have feelings at all, I'd have them for Deb.

Mike Donovan: Hail Mary, full of grace, the lord...
Dexter Morgan: [Slaps him] Stop, that never helped anybody.

Dexter Morgan: [narrating] With the solve rate for murders at about twenty percent, Miami is a great place for me. A great place for me to hone my craft. Viva Miami.

Dexter Morgan: Rita's ex-hubby, the crack addict, repeatedly raped her, knocked her around. Ever since then she's been completely uninterested in sex. That works for me!

Rita Bennett: What am I gonna do?
Dexter Morgan: Don't worry, I'll figure it out.
[voice over]
Dexter Morgan: And I will. I can always see other people's problems more clearly than my own.

Dexter Morgan: [voice over] I always prided myself on being an outsider... but now... I feel the need to connect with someone.

Officer Oliver: [Dexter, at a bloody crime scene, has just explained that they should be looking for someone who is really good with a knife] So, we are looking for a sushi chef?
Dexter Morgan: [deadpan] Yeah... Sushi chef is possible. It wouldn't be my first choice but hey... You never know.
Officer Oliver: Now what?
Dexter Morgan: [excited and pumps his fist] Now I eat!

Dexter Morgan: I chose Rita because she is, in her own way, as damaged as me.

Sergeant Doakes: Fuck you!
Dexter Morgan: Okay. Uh, is there something I can...
Sergeant Doakes: Yeah, you can get me your fucking analysis on the blood spatter on these killings! You think I'm here to invite you to my nephew's briss?
Dexter Morgan: [sarcastic] I didn't know you were Jewish!
Sergeant Doakes: Shut the fuck up and write your report already!

Dexter Morgan: Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen, again and again. It has to happen. Nice night. Miami is a great town. I love the Cuban food. Pork sandwiches. My favorite. But I'm hungry for something different now.

Dexter Morgan: [Deb dressed as hooker] Geez Deb, where the hell do you keep your gun?

Dexter Morgan: [to Deb] Keep the sex suit on when you're talking to the Captain, it'll help your cause.

Dexter Morgan: Talk to me about Jane Saunders.
Jamie Jaworski: Okay, I did her.
Dexter Morgan: How?
Jamie Jaworski: In a movie. A snuff film, but I'm not sorry.
Dexter Morgan: Of course not, and now I'm not sorry either.
[Dexter swings blade for the kill]

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Dogs don't like me because of what I sometimes do to their masters.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] The problem with eating and driving, which I love to do, is not being able to have my hands on the wheel at the 10 and 2 position. It's a matter of public safety.

Dexter Morgan: [first lines]
Dexter Morgan: Tonight's the night. It's going to happen again and again. Has to happen. Nice night. Miami is a great town. I love the Cuban food and pork sandwhiches, my favorite. But I'm hungry for something different, now.

Dexter Morgan: Do I see sheets of plastic in your future?

Harry Morgan: Okay, so we can't stop this. But maybe... we can do something... to channel it. Use it for good.
Teenage Dexter: How could it ever be good?
Harry Morgan: Son, there are people out there who do really bad things. Terrible people. And the police can't catch them all. Do you understand what I'm saying?
Teenage Dexter: You're saying... they deserve it.


"Dexter: It's Alive! (#2.1)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: There are moments when I feel the mask is slipping.

Dexter Morgan: Blood. Sometimes, it sets my teeth on edge. Other times, it helps me control the chaos.

Angel Batista: Don't forget. Tell the universe what you need.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I really need... to kill somebody.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I don't normally seek human contact in times of failure. But then, I don't normally experience failure.

Jimmy: [tied up and trying to curse Dexter with a strage voice] Those who believe in me shall be free.
Dexter Morgan: [slaps Jimmy's forehead] Knock it off!

Dexter Morgan: [about his arm before kill "little" Chino] Look at that, steady as a surgeon.

Dexter Morgan: Hey, Sergeant. Thank for supporting the bowling team.
Sergeant James Doakes: Fuck you! Where's my blood report on the Maynard victim? So what's that? A titty site?
Dexter Morgan: Caught me.
Sergeant James Doakes: Bullshit. What the hell were you really doing in here?
Dexter Morgan: The tits are right there.
Sergeant James Doakes: But in ten years, you've never rented a single porn title.
Dexter Morgan: How would you know?

Dexter Morgan: Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen again, and again. Has to happen. It's not what I want. But what I want doesn't matter. This is the only way I know how to survive. I'm coiled and ready to strike.
[Dexter bowls]
Dexter Morgan: Although a spare will do.

Vince Masuka: Keep your mind limber
Dexter Morgan: I'm doing mental jumping jacks

Dexter Morgan: I'm on edge. Thirty-eight days, sixteen hours, and twelve minutes have passed since I killed my brother. In that entire time, I haven't had a single night to myself. Sergeant Doakes makes sure of that. He follows me everywhere now. A human bloodhound incited by the scent of darkness. My best hope of losing him is to act relentlessly normal. Dull. So I bowl. What's really disturbing is that I'm good at it.

Dexter Morgan: [thoughts] With Doakes following me, my life has been all Jekyll and no Hyde. No moonlit playdates. No late night social calls. Not one. My brother would be so disappointed.
Angel Batista: Don't forget! Tell the universe what you really need!
Dexter Morgan: [thoughts] I really need... to kill somebody.

Dexter Morgan: Maybe I took pity on him. Yeah, he's a killer, but he also bumps into walls

Dexter Morgan: Hey, Sergeant. Thanks for supporting the bowling team.
Sergeant James Doakes: Fuck you.

Vince Masuka: [Deciding on who gets to inspect the body] Alright, call it - heads or tails?
Dexter Morgan: Heads.
Vince Masuka: [Dexter goes to see the body] I didn't flip yet!
Dexter Morgan: You said call it.

Dexter Morgan: That girl's gonna need more than crayons to set her world right. Killing Little Chino would restore my world, too. But only if the Code of Harry is satisfied.

Dexter Morgan: You've been benched?
Debra Morgan: Yeah, LaGuerta's just jealous that the Ice Truck Killer fucked me instead of her.
Dexter Morgan: Wow.

Jimmy: [tied up and trying to curse Dexter with a voodo voice] Those who believe in me shall be free.
Dexter Morgan: [slaps Jimmy's forehead] Knock it off!


"Dexter: Love American Style (#1.5)" (2006)
[Dexter is daydreaming at a crime scene; soft piano music is playing]
Dexter Morgan: [v.o] I like to pretend I'm alone. Completely alone. Maybe post-apocalypse or plague... Whatever. No-one left to act normal for. No need to hide who I really am. It would be... freeing.
Sergeant Doakes: [Doakes seemingly walks up out of nowhere] Stop grinning like a fucking psycho and get back to work!

Dexter Morgan: Maybe if I don't blink, my eyes will tear up.

Angel Batista: [hungover] I guess I had one too many, huh?
Dexter Morgan: And then about 10 more.

Jorge Castillo: I love you.
Valerie Castillo: I love you so much.
Dexter Morgan: I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to answer me honestly, understand? No more bullshit. How long have you been married?
Valerie Castillo: Twelve years.
Dexter Morgan: How do you love each other? You're like me, you make it work. How?
Jorge Castillo: We want the same life.
Valerie Castillo: We want the same thing
Dexter Morgan: You share the same dream?
Valerie Castillo, Jorge Castillo: Yes that's it.
Dexter Morgan: That's, uh, helpful. Thank you.
[stuffs cotton in their mouths and prepares to kill them]

Dexter Morgan: [narrating] I don't understand America's obsession with cars. I can just imagine squeezing Rita and the kids into this thing. Hitting the open road, cramped quarters, public bathrooms, hours of nothing but conversation. Someone's American dream, my nightmare.

Dexter Morgan: Do you have a dream for your life? Your future? Yes?
Rita Bennett: Of course. Do you?
Dexter Morgan: It might sound weird. I want to someday be content. Just feel comfortable, like everyone else. I want...
Rita Bennett: ...a normal life?
Dexter Morgan: Yeah, a normal life.
Rita Bennett: That's all I want. Just that.
Dexter Morgan: No fame and fortune? Excitement at every turn?
Rita Bennett: No, I've had enough excitement, thank you. I'll take boring.
Dexter Morgan: Average.
Rita Bennett: Ordinary.
Dexter Morgan: That's weird, huh?
Rita Bennett: Yeah.

Vince Masuka: [pointing to the gurney on which Tony Tucci had lain and had bled] Hey, Dexter, you, uh, you get all this blood on camera yet?
Dexter Morgan: Let's start shooting it, Jackson Pollock.

Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] She wants something from me. Ever since the blow-job, she assumes we've taken it to the next level. She doesn't know yet: I don't have a next level.

Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] It always comes to this, once sex is introduced. Small talk no longer cuts it. Eventually, she'll call me a science project and slam the door in my face.

Officer Gerard: Believe me, your maid is not the first one to get screwed.
Dexter Morgan: No, she's *a* maid, she's not *my* maid. So, have you heard of any other Cuban immigrants disappearing?
Officer Gerard: A few. The poor bastards. Spend their life's savings to get stuffed into a fish-hole. Puke the whole 90 miles to Miami. Then they get here thinking: I'm an American! I'm free! Except the damn coyote, he won't let 'em go till his family comes up for the surprise release fee. If they can't pay...
Dexter Morgan: They disappear.
Officer Gerard: Freedom's just another word for one more way to get fucked.

Officer Gerard: Look, buddy. I know you want to help out your maid. But there ain't a hell of a lot you can do.
Dexter Morgan: [thinks to himself] You'd be surprised.

Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Deviating from the plan may have been ill-advised. But, sometimes, you just have to take a risk. After all, isn't that what relationships are all about?

Dexter Morgan: She has no clue who she's with. Maybe that's the key to a successful relationship.

Angel Batista: You're kind of neat, aren't you?
Dexter Morgan: Bad habit instilled by mom.

Harry Morgan: That you, Dex?
Teenage Dexter: Yeah, sorry I'm late.
Harry Morgan: It's okay, son. Must have been having fun.
Teenage Dexter: No, I pretended to.
Harry Morgan: That's good, Dexter.
Teenage Dexter: Dad, do you think that maybe one day I'll, you know, feel it for real?
Harry Morgan: I hope so, son. I really do.

Harry Morgan: It's important that you seem normal.
Teenage Dexter: Even though I'm not?
Harry Morgan: Because you're not.


"Dexter: Crocodile (#1.2)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: My father taught me one thing above all others; to be sure. And I am. Matt Chambers, Miami is your last stop. If God is in the details and if I believed in God, he's in this room with me. I just wish he had brought an extension cord.

Dexter Morgan: My sister puts up a front so the world won't see how vulnerable she is. Me, I put up a front so the world won't see how vulnerable I'm not. I don't care who these fingertips belong to, only what my new friend out there is trying to say.

Dexter Morgan: I can kill a man, dismember his body, and be home in time for Letterman. But knowing what to say when my girlfriend's feeling insecure... I'm totally lost.

Dexter Morgan: I dream. I dream I'm floating on the surface of my own life. Watching it unfold. Observing it. I'm the outsider looking in.

Dexter Morgan: So what's up, hot shot?
Debra Morgan: Alright, get this. Lieutenant's looking for that refrigerated truck in every swamp, glade and chop shop from here to the Keys. The way I see it, that whack-job truck driver threw a severed head at your car. It's not as if he's shy.
Dexter Morgan: You think he's hiding the truck in plain sight, wanting it to be found?

Debra Morgan: Why is it we never talk brother-sister stuff?
Dexter Morgan: Our dad was a cop, you're a cop, I work for the cops... for us, this is brother-sister stuff.

Dexter Morgan: I see their pain. On some level I even understand their pain. I just can't feel their pain.

Dexter Morgan: Lately the thing that surprises me most about Rita is how much I like being with her. But whenever that happens with a woman, when I feel comfortable with her, it all goes wrong. That's why I think it's best to take it one step at a time.

Debra Morgan: Watching ice melt, this is fun.
Vince Masuka: Stand a little closer, Morgan, and I'll melt your heart.
Angel Batista: I think he's got a crush on you, Dex!
Dexter Morgan: Huh?
Vince Masuka: Yo, I was talking to Morgan the sister. Vince Masuka only swings one way.
Debra Morgan: Yeah, from vine to vine...
Lt. Maria Laguerta: Enough! Glad to see the sexual harassment seminar really paid off.

Dexter Morgan: Not guilty. Matt Chambers may have found a way to beat the system, but so have I.

Dexter Morgan: The worst thing about finally putting together a puzzle is finding there are missing pieces.

Dexter Morgan: There are no secrets in life, just hidden truths that lie beneath the surface.

Dexter Morgan: That's it. He's definitely the one. Now it's just a matter of time before he becomes a drop of blood in my glass slide collection.

Dexter Morgan: Preparation is vital. No detail can be overlooked and the ritual is intoxicating: duct tape, rubber sheets, necessary tools for play.

Dexter Morgan: If god is in the details, and if I believed in god, then he's in this room with me. I just wish he'd brought an extension cord.


"Dexter: Shrink Wrap (#1.8)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: [the psychiatrist turns off the lights in the room] What are you doing?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: I'd like to talk you through a deep relaxation technique. It might bring some things to the surface.
Dexter Morgan: What kinds of things?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, there must have been a time in your life when you felt powerless, right? Foster-child, no control over your destiny. If we can bring some of those memories to the surface, we might find the root of your "control issues". First I want you to close your eyes and focus on your breathing. I want you to count each breath, okay? In: one, and out: two. Just give it a try.
Dexter Morgan: [in voiceover] This is ridiculous. I could be killing him right now.

Dexter Morgan: Nothing like some Little Debbies and a worthy new adversary to clear my head.

Dexter Morgan: What are we looking at here?
Angel Batista: I'm thinking two circus clowns dancing. You?
Dexter Morgan: Nah, looks like a lobster. See the claws?
Angel Batista: Why do bloodstains always look like crustaceans to you?
Dexter Morgan: I like seafood
Angel Batista: Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] My therapist wants me to accept the things that are out of my hands. Tragically for him, he's not out of my hands.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I can't have sex with Rita. Every time I sleep with a woman, she sees me for what I really am. Empty. Then she's gone. But I don't want Rita to go, which means I have to deal with this.
[pause]
Dexter Morgan: I can't kill Meridian yet - I need another therapy session.

Dexter Morgan: I'm going to tell you something that I've never told anyone before.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Okay.
Dexter Morgan: I'm a serial killer.
[pause]
Dexter Morgan: Oh God. That feels... so amazing to say out loud
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, you must be letting go, 'cause I've never heard you make a joke before.
Dexter Morgan: I'm not joking; I kill people. Whoo. There it is again.
[pause]
Dexter Morgan: You should try it.

Dr. Meridian's Patient: [about Dr. Meridian] How about you? Finding him helpful?
Dexter Morgan: Nah. I'm a sociopath. There's not much he can do for me.

Dr. Emmett Meridian: So what do you want to talk about?
Dexter Morgan: Fakes. People who pass themselves off as something they're not.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Like a pre-owned car salesman?
Dexter Morgan: A brave politician.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: A Jew for Jesus.
Dexter Morgan: A wolf in sheep's clothing.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] This is a disaster. I chose Rita because she was damaged. If she gets better I'll lose her for sure.

Dexter Morgan: What can I do for you?
Lt. Maria Laguerta: So many things. I need the blood spatter report on Vanessa Gale.
Dexter Morgan: Blood spatter's inconclusive. All I can tell is she was shot at close range. I wish I had more for you.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: Mm. Me, too.
[Captain Matthews appears in the doorway and shouts at Maria]
Captain Tom Matthews: Maria! The D.A. needs the work-sheet for the Ice Truck Killer case.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: I'm working on it.
[puzzled]
Lt. Maria Laguerta: When did you talk to the D.A.?
Captain Tom Matthews: Oh, we had dinner last night. Mayor Allen took us out to celebrate Neil Perry's arrest. Hell of a good time.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: [She gives him a fake smile as he leaves and murmurs something including the word "puta."] I'm the one who get Perry to confess, and he's got the Mayor kissing his ass.
Dexter Morgan: I wouldn't be too upset. Matthews will be the one with the egg on his face soon enough.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: [softly] You still believe we got the wrong guy?
Dexter Morgan: Perry's a pretender to the throne. The real king is still out there, and he'll kill again. It's just a matter of time.

Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] The three suicide sisters shared the same therapist. Dr. Emmett Meridian. He must be terrible at his job.

[Still using the name "Sean", Dexter has returned to see Dr. Meridian as a patient, hoping for clues that Meridian has helped his rich women patients to suicide]
Dexter Morgan: She was sitting on top of me, basically naked.
[He sighs heavily]
Dexter Morgan: Asking me to spend the night. And I didn't know what to do.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: It's okay, Sean. Don't beat yourself up. Your girlfriend really means something to you. I know that.
Dexter Morgan: Well, if she means something, why did I run away from her?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: For the same reason that you work so hard to shut everybody else out. 'Cause you're afraid they won't like what they see.
Dexter Morgan: Yeah, I think you're right. How can I change that?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, for starters, you accept the fact that we all have a big bad wolf hiding inside of us. The darkness we don't want anyone else to see.
Dexter Morgan: [sensing a clue] Do you?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Of course I do.
Dexter Morgan: [Dexter puts his fingers close to his mouth, almost as though he wants to bite his nails] Really?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: [Nodding] Mm-hmm.
Dexter Morgan: Well, how do you deal with your own wolf?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, first of all, I accepted that it was there. I made friends with it. And I just let it out for a big meal, once in a while.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] At least three times, that we know about.

[Dexter has spent the night in Rita's bed and sits up at dawn, his back to her]
Rita Bennett: [drowsily] Next time we'll figure out what to tell the kids. So you don't have to sneak out like this.
Dexter Morgan: You want there to be a next time?
Rita Bennett: And a time after that!
[Still sleepy, but smiling, she rises enough to prop herself on one elbow]
Rita Bennett: Don't you?
Dexter Morgan: [the look on his face is both harsh and confused] No. I mean, yeah. I just -
[He turns to face her]
Dexter Morgan: I didn't freak you out?
Rita Bennett: Why would you think that?
[She reaches over to touch his arm]
Rita Bennett: Dexter, there's nothing you could ever do that would scare me away.


"Dexter: Born Free (#1.12)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: His happy place. Where he kills more than time.

Vince Masuka: Hey Dexter, better bundle up.
Dexter Morgan: I like the cold.
Vince Masuka: You know, hypothermia can easily sneak up on you.
Dexter Morgan: Yea, so can hypochondria.

Rita Bennett: I got your message. How's Debra?
Dexter Morgan: Hmm, she has all her limbs.
Rita Bennett: Thank God she is alive. That poor thing must be a mess, falling for a serial killer.
Dexter Morgan: What are the odds?

Dexter Morgan: [narrated, in reference to Doakes] My devil danced with his demon and the fiddler's tune is far from over.

[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: I've lived in darkness a long time. Over the years, my eyes adjusted until the dark became my world and I could see. But then Rudy turned on the light. He flooded my memory and now I'm blind.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: This is what it must feel like to walk in full sunlight, my darkness revealed, my shadow self embraced. Yeah, they see me. I'm one of them... In their darkest dreams.

Rita Bennett: Deb must be a mess. I mean falling for a serial killer?
Dexter Morgan: What are the odds?

Sergeant James Doakes: There some reason you're not answering your damn phone?
Dexter Morgan: Ambien.

Rudy Cooper: What, am I one of your victims now? You gonna collect a little sample of Bynie's blood for your slide collection?
Dexter Morgan: No, you're not a trophy. But you need to be put down.

Dexter Morgan: [narrated] There are roughly five thousand cargo containers in the Port of Miami. Finding the one where my mother was butchered took a bit of magic.

[Dexter plans to break into the Port of Miami compound, which he figures will not be easy]
Dexter Morgan: [narrated] It's in there, somewhere. My birthplace. Now what?
[He walks past the tall perimeter fences]
Dexter Morgan: [narrated] No cameras, no patrols, no dogs. With billions spent on Homeland Security, it can't be as easy as a couple of snips.
[He easily snips through the chain on the lock that holds the gate closed]
Dexter Morgan: So much for the War on Terror.

Dexter Morgan: He killed that girl to keep us busy, so he could escape. But he wouldn't go without leaving us a message. We just need to find it.


"Dexter: Waiting to Exhale (#2.2)" (2007)
[Walking into a church with Rita, Cody, and Astor]
Dexter Morgan: If I believed in God - If I believed in sin - this is the place where I'd be sucked straight to Hell... if I believed in Hell.

Dexter Morgan: I'm drifting, but not to sleep.

Dexter Morgan: [Dexter's mobile rings while he is dumping Little Chino in several garbage bags into the Gulf Stream; he answers] Hey, you.
Rita Bennett: [trying to sound as firm as possible] I need to see you.
Dexter Morgan: Uh...
[I'm]
Dexter Morgan: just dropping somebody off, can it wait?
Rita Bennett: [managing to sound firm] No, it can't.
Dexter Morgan: Alright then.
[closes mobile]

Vince Masuka: Eight confirmed
Dexter Morgan: Eight confirmed? Here?
Angel Batista: No. Here is just one.
Vince Masuka: We're talking eight confirmed victims of the Bay Harbor Butcher.
Dexter Morgan: The Bay Harbor... Butcher?
Vince Masuka: That's what the press is calling whoever dumped those bodies off shore. Has a nice ring to it, no?
Dexter Morgan: Well, it's a little... lurid
Angel Batista: Lurid and possibly wrong. Part of me's hoping they found the Ice Truck Killer's dumping ground.
Dexter Morgan: Tell me about it. Last thing Miami needs is another serial killer.

Dexter Morgan: I have to focus. Tune everything out. If I don't, being linked to my beautiful bodies of work will be the least of my worries

Dexter Morgan: Red rover, red rover, send Chino back over.

Dexter Morgan: I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister.

Special Agent Frank Lundy: First report from the field had these parts as coming from one body.
Dexter Morgan: [thoughts] Actually, it's two
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Actually, it's two.
Dexter Morgan: [thoughts] Uh-oh.

Dexter Morgan: I can't afford to lose it. Not with Special Agent Rock Star on my case.

Dexter Morgan: Come on, don't get the shakes now. This is no time for performance anxiety.

Dexter Morgan: You're still here.
Rudy Cooper: Never left.
Dexter Morgan: Yeah, you did. I killed you.
Rudy Cooper: No, you just took my life.
Dexter Morgan: So how do I make you go away?
Rudy Cooper: [watching Rita and the kids pray] Hmmm. Well you could try doing what these people are doing.

Dexter Morgan: [narrating about the rather tall "little" Chino] This guy is officially the highest point in all of Florida.


"Dexter: Circle of Friends (#1.7)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: I hate to break this to you, Deb, but you know you've got the wrong guy here, right? The Ice Truck Killer drains the blood from his victims, freezes the bodies and only then severs their limbs. It's clean and efficient, that's his psychological signature. Neil Perry on the other hand, stuffs roadkill.
Debra Morgan: Yeah! And turns 'em into fucked up fantasy shit.
Dexter Morgan: But the fantasies are all wrong! The guy we're lookin' for wouldn't turn dead dirty things into living cartoons, he'd find that pathetic.
Debra Morgan: How do you know?
Dexter Morgan: [pause] Because it is pathetic.

Dexter Morgan: I'm a lot like you, you know?
Jeremy Downs: Yeah, right. You're a killer?
Dexter Morgan: I'm empty... but I found a way to make it feel less bottomless.
Jeremy Downs: How?
Dexter Morgan: Pretend. You pretend the feelings are there, for the world and for the people around you. Who knows, maybe one day they will be.

Dexter Morgan: The FBI estimates that there are less than 50 serial killers active in the United States today. We don't get together at conventions, share trade secrets, or exchange Christmas cards... But sometimes I wonder what it's like for the others. The only sound I hear, the only sound in the entire world... is my heart beating.

Dexter Morgan: For weeks, I've felt like a student in a master class. Is it really possible that the master's on the run? And even more tragic, does he live in a double-wide?

Rita Bennett: Fucking bastard!
Dexter Morgan: Only you can make those words cute.

Dexter Morgan: [about Paul] When'd you first notice it, this darkness inside the guy you fell for?
Rita Bennett: I always knew it was there. I guess I just didn't think I deserved better, 'til I met you.
Dexter Morgan: I have a dark side too.
[Rita laughs]
Dexter Morgan: What? I do.
Rita Bennett: Somehow I doubt that. You have a good heart, Dexter. You're not like Paul, you don't hurt people.
Dexter Morgan: Innocent people. I don't hurt innocent people.

Rita Bennett: [about Paul] I just wish he'd just go away. I mean, why can't he just go away and disappear forever?
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] He can do that. Very easily.

Dexter Morgan: [in voice-over] I knew I recognized the knife-work of the killer. Jeremy Downs. I had him. He was mine. Until I found out the boy Jeremy killed raped him!
Jeremy Downs: [speaking from the past] He fucked me, and I killed him!
Dexter Morgan: [in voice-over] So I let Jeremy go. It seemed fair. But my random act of kindness was misguided. If I'd followed my instincts, this boy's High School Year Book would still have an Editor.

[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: The F.B.I. estimates that there are less than fifty serial killers active in the United States today. We don't get together at conventions, share trade secrets, or exchange Christmas cards. But sometimes I wonder what it's like for the others. The only sound I hear, the only sound in the entire world, is my heart beating.

Sgt. James Doakes: I swear to Christ, Morgan, after this case, I'm submitting your ass to psychiatric evaluation.
Dexter Morgan: I'm just retracing cast-off patterns, directionality angles.
Sgt. James Doakes: Can you tell us what happened here or not?
Dexter Morgan: It's an execution.
Sgt. James Doakes: Pretty unlikely victim. The kid's an honor student. The editor of his High School Yearbook.

[to Deb, looking at the photo of Neil Perry]
Dexter Morgan: Hardly looks like a guy capable of terrorizing Miami. A science camp, maybe.


"Dexter: An Inconvenient Lie (#2.3)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: I'm Dexter and I'm not sure what I am.
Narcotics Anonymous Group: Hi, Dexter.
Dexter Morgan: I just know there's something dark in me and I hide it. I certainly don't talk about it, but it's there always, this Dark Passenger. And when he's driving, I feel alive, half sick with the thrill of complete wrongness. I don't fight him, I don't want to. He's all I've got. Nothing else could love me, not even... especially not me. Or is that just a lie the Dark Passenger tells me? Because lately there are these moments when I feel connected to something else... someone. It's like the mask is slipping and things... people... who never mattered before are suddenly starting to matter. It scares the hell out of me.

Vince Masuka: Who's your daddy?
Dexter Morgan: Uh... Harry Morgan.

Vince Masuka: Most of them have been underwater for years. But some, it's awesome, you can't even tell. The temperature on the ocean floor, and the airtight bags kept them intact. I mean, a little gelatinous residue, sure. But...
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I'd rather remember my old playmates as they were. Neat, clean little packages.

Dexter Morgan: I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister.

Dexter Morgan: I go to stalk a killer, and I end up with a new car. How'd that happen?

Vince Masuka: Who's your daddy?
Dexter Morgan: ...Uh, Harry Morgan?

Narcotics Anonymous Group: [a woman is speaking at the podium] I got to the point where I would kill for a Vicodin.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Lightweight.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover, about the used car salesman] It's a toupee. Even this guy's hair is a lie.

Narcotics Anonymous Group: [a woman is speaking at the podium] I would have killed for a vicodin.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Lightweight.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover, about the used car salesman] A toupee. Even this guy's hair is a lie.

Caroline: [at a Narcotics Anonymous meeting] Um, I started taking pain pills after my back surgery. I don't need them for the pain anymore. Now I... Now I just need them.
Dexter Morgan: [narrating] And I need duct tape - three or four rolls, running low on heavy-duty trash bags. When's the last time I sharpened my knives?


"Dexter: Popping Cherry (#1.3)" (2006)
Rita Bennett: [the family are working in the garden] Thank you for doing this, Dexter. I moved here from Michigan with dreams of fruit trees in my garden.
Cody Bennett: But they keep dying.
Rita Bennett: I can't help it, I kill things.
Dexter Morgan: That must be awful. Fortunately, I have a green thumb. The key to happy citrus is a fertilizer. Bone meal works the best.

Angel Batista: [about the body found on the ice of a hockey arena] What do you think he's trying to tell us?
Dexter Morgan: That hockey's a violent sport?

Dexter Morgan: All you can do is play along at life, and hope that sometimes you get it right.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Most people have a hard time dealing with death, but I'm not most people. It's the grief that makes me uncomfortable. Not because I'm a killer, really. I just don't understand all that emotion, which makes it tough to fake.
[putting on sun glasses]
Dexter Morgan: In those cases, shades come in handy.

Dexter Morgan: [holding Astor] If I had a heart, it might be breaking right now.

Dexter Morgan: Do you want a hug?
Debra Morgan: Fuck off.

Dexter Morgan: Look I don't want to cancel all my credit cards and I hate waiting in line at the DMV, so give me back the wallet you stole from my car or I'll break your fucking neck!

Dexter Morgan: How'd it feel? To kill a guy.
Harry Morgan: Not so great Dex. When you take a man's life you're not just killing him, you're snuffing out all the things he'll ever become. As a cop I only fire my weapon to save a life, that's a code I live by. Killing must serve a purpose or else it's just plain murder.

Dexter Morgan: Everyone moves to Miami to die, which means we have more junk than any city in America.

Angel Batista: She's a butterface.
Dexter Morgan: What's a butterface?
Angel Batista: You know, compadre. She's got a hot body - but her face.
Dexter Morgan: Oh.
Vince Masuka: How great would it be to pull a bronco on her? Yeah? Yeah?
[Dexter is baffled again]
Angel Batista: You do it doggie-style. Right? And just when she's getting into it, you grab her by the hips, and you yell another woman's name, and, bam, you're riding her like a bronco, because she's trying to buck you off.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Many times in life I feel like I'm missing some essential piece of the human puzzle. This is one of them.


"Dexter: Return to Sender (#1.6)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: I don't have bad dreams. When I sleep, all of me sleeps. Nothing ever goes bump in Dexter's night.

Dexter Morgan: What am I even looking for?
Vince Masuka: Wait for it.
Dexter Morgan: This is a prelim. I don't have time to...
Vince Masuka: M-fucking-99.
Dexter Morgan: Etorphine hydrochloride?
Vince Masuka: An animal tranquillizer more powerful than morphine. Causes total paralysis. That mark on her neck kept bugging me, so I ordered up a tox screen.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] That's it. No more doughnuts for Masuka.

Dexter Morgan: I don't get birthdays; the party, the song. Celebrating another year just being alive feels... forced.

Dexter Morgan: [reading Deb's profile of Valerie Castillo's killer] The similar manner in which the victim's body was displayed suggests this killer feels a connection to the Ice Truck Killer, excited by what he's doing. The cut on the victim's cheek, while not fatal, appears to be a signature of sorts. Because of the lack of evidence collected from the crime scene, the suspect may be familiar with law enforcement or forensics procedure. Huh.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I shouldn't even be here. Rita will be devastated if I'm arrested. Her husband was a crackhead and her boyfriend's a serial killer. It's hard not to take that personally.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I was wrong about birthdays. Maybe the reason to celebrate them is what they offer: the hope of living to see another one.

[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Life is so fleeting. So fragile. Every breath of potential may not last.

Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] My neat little world of lies is crumbling all around me. And I can't tell a soul. Especially not Deb.

Dexter Morgan: Nothing lasts forever. Just ask a Ford Pinto.

Dexter Morgan: Eventually, most serial killers get caught. There's really not much of a retirement plan.


"Dexter: Let's Give the Boy a Hand (#1.4)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Everyone hides who they are at least some of the time. Sometimes you bury that part of yourself so deeply you have to be reminded it's even there at all. And sometimes you just want to forget who you are altogether... I'm not the monster he wants me to be so I'm neither man nor beast. I'm something new entirely, with my own set of rules. I'm Dexter. Boo.

Dexter Morgan: I love Halloween. The one time of year when everyone wears a mask... not just me. People think it's fun to pretend you're a monster. Me, I spend my life pretending I'm not. Brother, friend, boyfriend - All part of my costume collection. Some people might call me a fraud. Let's see if it will fit. I prefer to think of myself as a master of disguise.

Dexter Morgan: You could take him inside!
Rita's Neighbor: Walther is an outside dog.
Dexter Morgan: You take him inside, he is an inside dog.
Rita's Neighbor: He doesn't like being inside.
Dexter Morgan: He tell you that?

Dexter Morgan: Human bonds always lead to messy complications. Commitment. Sharing. Driving people to the airport.

Angel Batista: I need your expertise, bro.
Dexter Morgan: I live to serve.
Angel Batista: Excuse us, fellas.
[He shows Dexter a severed hand, leaned upright in a beach chair, with a puddle of red blood beneath it]
Dexter Morgan: Interesting hand job.
Angel Batista: [chuckles] That's funny.
Dexter Morgan: [looking confused] It is?

Dexter Morgan: "Ox?"
Angel Batista: No. Fuck! What's the matter with you? It's X's and O's.
Dexter Morgan: Like tic-tac-toe?
Angel Batista: Like hugs and kisses! Diamond-filled hugs and kisses in a white gold setting
Dexter Morgan: Well, that's good, because you wouldn't want it to look like someone's playing tic-tac-toe on her head.

Lt. Maria LaGuerta: Do you think Tucci's still alive?
Dexter Morgan: If he is, he won't be for long.

Harry Morgan: Being part of a family means smiling for photos.
Young Dexter: Why should I pretend to be happy?

Harry Morgan: It's great to see you're having such a good time, Dex.
Teenage Dexter: You kidding me? This hay is giving me a total allergy attack. We're just going in circles around a pumpkin patch. I don't get it.


"Dexter: Father Knows Best (#1.9)" (2006)
Dexter Morgan: I built my life on Harry's code. I lived by it. But Harry lied. Why would he do that? What else don't I know? My concrete foundation is turning to shifting sand. Maybe Rudy was right. You never can truly know anyone.

Dexter Morgan: Thank God for showers. Private time to think. Harder to come by now that I'm in a real relationship.

Dexter Morgan: Blood never lies.

Sgt. James Doakes: I saw a gun in the suspect's waistband. I went to question him, and he took off running when he saw me.
Lt. Maria LaGuerta: Angel, you saw all this?
[Angel looks at Doakes almost hesitantly]
Angel Batista: Yeah, I saw
[Bayarde?]
Angel Batista: bolt, and I turned the car around in pursuit.
Lt. Maria LaGuerta: All right, then when you went under the Causeway?
[Dexter approaches them]
Sgt. James Doakes: He took a shot at me. I took cover and returned fire from that corner.
Dexter Morgan: No, not from there.
Sgt. James Doakes: Yeah, from fuckin' right there!
[Angel and LaGuerta look at Doakes, then at Dexter]
Dexter Morgan: Look, if you shot him from there, the blood splatter would go in that direction, but look at the patterns.
Sgt. James Doakes: [angry] You questionin' me? 'Cause I got a lot of questions for you!
Angel Batista: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, the man's just doing what he's supposed to do.
Sgt. James Doakes: The man is a fuckin' creep job!
Lt. Maria LaGuerta: [placatingly] James, just focus on the facts, okay? Now, the D.A.'s Team is ready for you. Are you good?
Sgt. James Doakes: I'm good.
Lt. Maria LaGuerta: Yeah. You're up next.
Dexter Morgan: [amused, to Angel] Sorry, but I didn't invent physics.

[Dexter is getting up out of bed in the house that Driscoll bequeathed to him, leaving Rita sleeping, and getting dressed. He remembers that Debra and Rudy had invited themselves over, when he didn't want anyone there except himself]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] How did a death turn into a couples' weekend?
[He closes the bedroom door quietly]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Luckily, I get up earlier than normal people.
[Dexter heads for the kitchen, where Rudy is pouring coffee]
Rudy Cooper: Coffee?

[At the morgue, Dexter meets Dr. Pittman. Dexter is not at all impressed by Dr. Pittman's inflated opinion of himself; and Dexter trusts less and less in the doctor's abilities as an observer as the scene goes on]
Dr. Pittman: I gave Joe a physical once a year, like clockworks, and no history of heart disease, but it happens.
Dexter Morgan: Mm-hm, it appears so.
Dr. Pittman: About to send him to the Crematorium when we found you. We thought his son should have his chance to pay his last respects.
Dexter Morgan: I'm not his son.
Dr. Pittman: [taking this in the wrong way] An estrangement in a family is a shame, but Death is the great unifier.
[He wheels the corpse out on a gurney. Dexter nods. The doctor pulls the sheet back. Dexter leans down close to look at the corpse's face. Then he goes around to the other side of the body and kneels to examine a tattoo covering the left elbow and much of the arm]
Dexter Morgan: Oh. It's an interesting tattoo.
Dr. Pittman: [affectionately] Joe said he'd picked that up in Nam. You can be proud he was a patriot!
Dexter Morgan: Mm, perhaps. He was also an ex-convict.
Dr. Pittman: Excuse me?
Dexter Morgan: It's a prison tattoo.

Dexter Morgan: How did you determine cardiac arrest was the damage to the coronary artery?
[Dr. Pittman glares at him]
Dexter Morgan: Sir, it's out of professional curiosity. I work in Forensics, down in Miami.
Dr. Pittman: I see. Well, um, I found micro-aneurysims in the retinas. They're common, with seizures, during a heart attack.
Dexter Morgan: And it's also a sign of diabetic retinopathy.
Dr. Pittman: [condescendingly] Son, I may be a small-town doctor, but I know a heart attack when I see one.

[Continuing the conversation with Dexter]
Dr. Pittman: Who knows what caused it? Stress, inactivity, French fries?
[as Dexter looks down on the tattoo again, he hears, drowning out the voice of Dr. Pittman, a song begin: It's Creedence Clearwater Revival, singing "Have You Ever Seen The Rain?" - and he is flashing back to when he was a small child. And he sees an arm stretched with the same webbed tattoo that he saw on Driscoll's arm. Dexter begins hearing Dr. Pittman again:]
Dr. Pittman: ...It's hard to accept so many unanswered questions, but sometimes...
[Dexter raises his hands to his face]
Dexter Morgan: No, you're right. Dr. Pittman. Man. This is really hard. Do you mind if I just take a minute alone? With... Dad?
Dr. Pittman: [smiles] I'll be next door in my office.


"Dexter: The Dark Defender (#2.5)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: Am I the twisted Bay Harbor Butcher, or the valiant Dark Defender?

Dexter Morgan: Want a real glimpse of the human nature? Stand in the way of someone's mocha latte.

Debra Morgan: [sipping her latte] Oh, sweet Mary, mother of fuck, that's good!
Dexter Morgan: I think you might have broken a commandment somewhere in there.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] The rocks I used to submerge my victims may eventually sink me too, but if I'm learning anything in recovery, it's "one day at a time."

Debra Morgan: If dad taught us one thing, it's the value of human life.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Yeah, but I think we had different homework assignments.

Dexter Morgan: See you tonight?
Debra Morgan: I think I'm staying at Gabriel's.
Dexter Morgan: I thought you were taking it slow.
Debra Morgan: We are. No sex, just cuddling.
Dexter Morgan: My little sister, the cuddler.
Debra Morgan: I got a scalding-hot beverage here, Dex. Don't make me use it.
Dexter Morgan: Love you, too.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I never really got the whole superhero thing. But lately, it does seem we have a lot in common. Tragic beginnings... Secret identities... Part human, part mutant...
Dexter Morgan: [in reference to Doakes] Archenemies.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Am I the twisted Bay Harbor Butcher, or am I the valiant Dark Defender?
[thinks about it for a second]
Dexter Morgan: Nah. Miami's too hot for all that leather.


"Dexter: Seeing Red (#1.10)" (2006)
Debra Morgan: Dexter, heads up. Bad in there.
Dexter Morgan: Ok.
Debra Morgan: I'm serious!
Dexter Morgan: Ok.
Sergeant Doakes: She's not kidding. It's your wet dream in there.
Dexter Morgan: Okay...

Dexter Morgan: That leaves only one set of footprints unaccounted for, the killer's. This shows everywhere he went in the room. The question is: Why?
Lt. Maria Laguerta: Now, hold on. Am I missing something? Where are the victims' footprints?
Dexter Morgan: Give that lady a lollipop!

Dexter Morgan: Why don't you kids go wait in my car? I want to talk to your mom for a sec.
Astor: Are you gonna make out?
Dexter Morgan: None of your business.

Dexter Morgan: Oh, hi.
Debra Morgan: Hi.
Dexter Morgan: Oh, Masuka was looking for you. Something about drinks at the Bel Canto.
Debra Morgan: Yeah, I told him I had a yeast infection.
Dexter Morgan: A bit of an overshare.

Dexter Morgan: The trifecta: weapon, ammo, and impaired judgement. Throw in a little domestic violence, and you have the perfect recipe for a family slaughter.

Sergeant James Doakes: Morgan, get your ass over here.
Dexter Morgan: Ass on route.

Rita Bennett: Where were you?
Dexter Morgan: Taking out the trash.

Dexter Morgan: So this is doom. I've been the architect of so much of it, it's only fair that I should know what the fuss is all about. He left me this room for a reason. Five women gave their blood, their lives for this moment. There's only one way to find out why.


"Dexter: The British Invasion (#2.12)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: If they find Doakes in a cage, it will seriously undermine my frame job.

Dexter Morgan: [about the kids] The sex police are here.

Dexter Morgan: You're going away with me all right - in a garbage bag.

Dexter Morgan: Was it spontaneous combustion? Divine intervention? If you believe that God makes miracles, you have to wonder if Satan has a few up his sleeve.

Debra Morgan: You're a little weird, Dex.
Dexter Morgan: That's not gonna change. I'm gonna be this way forever.
Debra Morgan: I can live with that.

Dexter Morgan: It's strange to have a creation out there. A deeply mutated version of yourself, running loose and screwing everything up. I wonder if this is how parents feel.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: Am I evil? Am I good? I'm done asking those questions. I don't have the answers. Does anyone?


"Dexter: Dex, Lies, and Videotape (#2.6)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: The full force of the FBI, that's the last thing I need. I've got to make sure Lundy gets his man. After I figure out a way to erase the marina files. And make up with my girlfriend. And then maybe I'll tackle world hunger because things can't really get much worse.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] The show has already started, but have they seen the feature presentation? Bane of the Bay Harbor Butcher starring Dexter Morgan as himself?

Dexter Morgan: The voices are back. Excellent.

Angel Batista: [laying a hand on Dexter's shoulder; referring to the Bay Harbor Butcher] We've never been this close to this pendejo.
Dexter Morgan: [thoughts] Closer than you think, amigo.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] It seems that my foster father and my biological mother were having an affair. It's bad enough I can't shake the visual, but the question's did he blame himself for her death? Is that why he took me in? Did he love her? Or was he just using her? Was he using me? I always thought Harry's code was on-the-spot creative problem-solving but maybe he planned for me to settle the score all along. It's times like this I wish I really were a drug addict.

[Dexter is talking to a copycat killer who was strapped to a table after he told Dexter that he actually had killed people before]
Ken Olson: I'm not the bay harbor butcher. I'm certainly not anybody's role model.
Ken Olson: What are you talking about then? Who are you?
Dexter Morgan: I'll let you know when I figure that out. Though, I got to tell you, I am well on my way because, as sure as I'm standing here, I don't need to kill you.
Ken Olson: That's a relief.
Dexter Morgan: I mean that need that comes from within that always drives me to this table - I don't feel it. I'm in recovery.
Ken Olson: Well, I mean, I knew you weren't gonna kill me.
Dexter Morgan: No, I'm gonna kill you I have to. I just don't kneed to. It's very empowering.


"Dexter: This Is the Way the World Ends (#6.12)" (2011)
Dexter Morgan: [to Harrison] Whether you're a lion or a lamb, I'll always love you.

Dexter Morgan: [Like "the sign of a cross" prayer] I am a father... a son... a serial killer.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: Oh God!

Dexter Morgan: I known people who believe in God. They never use as excuse their faith to kill ten people. You used God. It's not the other way around.

Travis Marshall: You gonna burn in hell.
Dexter Morgan: No. I think I belong right here. Because maybe there's a place for me in this world. Just as I am. Light cannot exist without darkness. Each has it purpose. And if there's a purpose to my darkness maybe it's to bring some balance to the world.


"Dexter: See-Through (#2.4)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] In our most paranoid moments, we fear that everyone is talking about us. That's become my reality. I can't hear what they're saying, but I know it's not nice.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I've always been good with parents. The key is to simply think of them as aliens from a distant universe.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I refuse to believe that vince masuka is the man who single-handedly brings me down. I also know denial is the first stage of the grieving process for those who learn they're going to die.

Rita Bennett: [about the Bay harbor butcher] You know, I hope they catch him today. And I'm not a violent person, but I hope they hurt him.
[to Dexter]
Rita Bennett: Have a good day.
Dexter Morgan: [narrating] Make up your mind.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] It's an odd sensation to be experiencing what might be called hope for the first time in my life, at the same time I suddenly I find weighing the benefits of electrocution versus lethal injection - but here I am.


"Dexter: That Night, a Forest Grew (#2.7)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: [in bed] You really know what you want, don't you?
Lila: I hope you don't mind. Some men do.
Dexter Morgan: No. I've always found instruction manuals... quite useful.
Lila: Okay, your turn. What do you want?
Dexter Morgan: I think that was it.
Lila: Hmm, come on. You must have some dark fantasies, unfulfilled urges.
Dexter Morgan: I'm pretty good at acting on those.
Lila: Really? Then fuck me like that.

Dexter Morgan: No matter what you try, no matter when, no matter how hard you work, I'll always be a step ahead of you for one simple reason.
Sergeant James Doakes: And what's that?
Dexter Morgan: I own you.

Dexter Morgan: [Before hitting James Doakes] I own you.

Debra Morgan: [Debra walks into Dexter's bedroom. There are dozens of lit candles around the room] Who's the skank?
Dexter Morgan: Deb, did knocking occur to you?
Debra Morgan: Who is she? And, are you trying to fuck her or set her on fire?


"Dexter: Our Father (#3.1)" (2008)
Miguel Prado: Do you have a brother?
Dexter Morgan: [long pause as cell phone buzzes] Just the one loud sister.

Oscar Prado: [as he is dying] Who are you?
Dexter Morgan: Who are you?

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Most normal people enjoy a sacred pact with society. Live a good life and society will take care of you. But if society drops the ball then someone else has to pick up the slack. That's where I come in.

Dexter Morgan: [answers phone] Dexter Morgan
[pause]
Dexter Morgan: Yes I'm happy with my long distance provider


"Dexter: What's Eating Dexter Morgan? (#8.3)" (2013)
[Dr. Vogel notices Dexter loading up his vehicle to leave the crime scene and walks over]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: What is it?
Dexter Morgan: It's Deb. She was brought in for a DUI. I need to check on her.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Is alcohol an issue for her?
Dexter Morgan: I'm an issue for her. She's acting this way because of me.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: But you can't keep taking on your sister's problems, especially right now.
Dexter Morgan: [impatient] It's my fault, okay? Deb found out... what I am. She knows everything.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Everything?
[Dexter nods]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: How?
Dexter Morgan: It's a long story. Just suffice to say, she's not handling it well.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: [studying Dexter] You do really feel badly, don't you?
Dexter Morgan: Are you analyzing me now?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Well, it's just so unusual.
Dexter Morgan: It's really not a good time.
[Dexter gets in his car and drives off]

Dexter Morgan: Just looking for an all-over workout, maximize my time.
Ron Galuzzo: [holding up electronic body mass calipers] Mind if I take a body measurement?
Dexter Morgan: Uh, sure.
[Ron rolls up Dexter's sleeve and puts the calipers against his upper arm. They don't go wide enough to measure properly]
Ron Galuzzo: Looks like you're already in pretty good shape.
[calipers beep, Ron looks at the reading]
Ron Galuzzo: [impressed] Ooh, you have a very low muscle to fat ratio.
Dexter Morgan: Well, thanks. I do what I can, you know.
Ron Galuzzo: [indicating the Chiseler 300] Yeah, this equipment is... more for beginners. People who don't already have an established routine?
Dexter Morgan: Mm.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Does he know who I am? Trying to get rid of me?
Dexter Morgan: [aloud] I'm just looking to change up my workout. I'd love any suggestions.
Ron Galuzzo: [smiling, wags a finger, then points it to another machine] That baby. Cuts you up faster than a chef at Benihana. Come on, give it a try.
Dexter Morgan: Okay.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] He doesn't seem to recognize me.

Dexter Morgan: I'm meeting Deb for dinner. I'll check in with you later.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Uh, wait. Just- There's one thing I was wondering about since we last spoke?
Dexter Morgan: Yes?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: When Harry and I came up with the Code, he insisted that you only kill bad people, and *I* insisted that the first rule of the Code be, "Don't get caught," giving you a little wiggle room.
Dexter Morgan: Okay.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: So my question is this: when your sister found out about who you were and what you were doing... why didn't you kill her?
Dexter Morgan: [shocked] What?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Not that I would ever advocate such a thing, but since Debra knew the truth about you, she's clearly a risk...
Dexter Morgan: I would never kill Debra. She's my sister. I love her.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: What, exactly, do you love about her?
Dexter Morgan: [pauses] Wha- what do you mean?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: When a psychopath speaks about love, it doesn't really mean the same thing as for... typical people. So, what do you love about her?
Dexter Morgan: [at word loss] I-I don't know. I love having steaks and beer with her, and until recently, the fact that she... is always there for me, the way she looked up to me.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: But none of that is really about Debra. It's about what she does for *you*.
Dexter Morgan: So you're saying I'm selfish?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: I'm not criticising. Selfless love is hard enough for typical people. And for psychopaths, it's... impossible.
Dexter Morgan: So why are you telling me this? So I'll feel bad about myself?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Quite the contrary. I want you to *revel* in what you are. I told you, you're perfect.
Dexter Morgan: How can you still say that when you know what I've done to Deb?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: That's my point. You're perfect as a psychopath. All this talk about helping Debra and... loving her- it's like you're Michelangelo trying to play the banjo.
Dexter Morgan: I'm trying to be good brother.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Why don't you let *me* help Debra?
Dexter Morgan: Because she wouldn't even listen to you. I'm the only one that understands her.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Dexter, you've admitted to being the cause for her pain. How can you expect to be the solution?
Dexter Morgan: I can handle Deb. I've been doing it my entire life.

Lt. Angel Batista: M.E.'s report is back from the cabin. They've officially ruled Lyle Sussman's death as a suicide. So with that, the Brain Surgeon case is officially closed.
Deputy Chief Tom Matthews: Okay. I'll call Evelyn, thank her for her help.
Vince Masuka: [leaning close and whispering to Det. Miller] "Evelyn"? Someone's got a high hard one for the good doctor.
Det. Angie Miller: What did I say about standing too close?
Deputy Chief Tom Matthews: Any progress on that El Sapo shooting?
Lt. Angel Batista: Still no leads. I've been going back and forth with Ft. Lauderdale P.D. Apparently, El Sapo was a suspect in the stabbing of a smash-and-grab lowlife by the name of Andrew Briggs.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] The cops will never find out that Deb killed El Sapo. So right now, I can focus on protecting Vogel... and myself.
[on his iPhone 4S, Dexter launches the FriendZone app and searches for... ]
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Ron Galuzzo. He could be hunting me right now.
[Dexter follows a link from Galuzzo's profile field for Occupation to the Work Out City website]
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Or he could be selling fitness equipment at the mall.
Lt. Angel Batista: Good work today, everyone.


"Dexter: Morning Comes (#2.8)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: Hi, you wanted to...
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Morgan, come in. Can I offer you some tea?
Dexter Morgan: Uh, no, thank you. I'm...
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] And he pours it anyway. He's trying to throw me off balance, show that I don't have the power to say no to him.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: How about some sesame crackers to go with that?
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] So I'll say yes to everything.
Dexter Morgan: I'd love some.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Oh. Sorry. Guess I ate them all.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Asshole.

Special Agent Frank Lundy: So, you worked firsthand on, what, four of the cases related to the Bay Harbor investigation?
Dexter Morgan: I believe so.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Your reports were a real pleasure to read. Concise, meticulous. I appreciate that.
Dexter Morgan: Good. Thank you.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Does your sister prefer meat or fish?
Dexter Morgan: Debra?
Special Agent Frank Lundy: You have more than one?
Dexter Morgan: Sister? Uh, no. Just Deb.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Or is she more of a salad kind of person?
Dexter Morgan: She's definitely a carnivore.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Good. Good.

Special Agent Frank Lundy: So... the Rodrigo case. Let's talk about that one.
Dexter Morgan: Okay.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Kind of blew it, didn't you?
Dexter Morgan: I'm sorry?
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Anthony Rodrigo: crack dealer with an apparent habit of killing people who got in his way. I believe this was... yes, Doakes' and Batista's case. They finally tied Rodrigo to one of his victims, built a solid manslaughter case, would have got him off the street for a few years. But the case largely rested on the blood work that you did. Blood work that in the course of the trial was proven to be, well... wrong. So, you - one of the most cautious and precise forensic specialists I've had the pleasure to work with - you performed blood work that directly led to Rodrigo walking free. I asked myself, "How the hell did that happen?"
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] And did you answer, "Dexter blew the case on purpose so that he could get Rodrigo off the streets for good with a cordless reciprocating saw"?
Dexter Morgan: I'm sorry. You've caught me off-guard here.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: Sloppy blood work.

Special Agent Frank Lundy: Can I offer you some tea?
Dexter Morgan: Uh, no, thank you I'm -
[And he pours it anyway]
Dexter Morgan: He's trying to throw me off balance, show that I don't have the power to say no to him
Special Agent Frank Lundy: How about some sesame crackers to go with that?
Dexter Morgan: So I'll say yes to everything. I'd love some.
Special Agent Frank Lundy: [checks box] Oh, sorry. Guess I ate them all.
Dexter Morgan: Asshole.


"Dexter: Take It! (#5.8)" (2010)
[first lines]
Jordan Chase: [v.o. violent animal imagery in black and white] We are born primal. Conceived with the impulse to fight for what we desire. It's written in our genes. It's engraved in our souls. But we've traded the wilderness for pavement, trees for skyscrapers. We've lost touch with our instincts, with what we are. We have fallen from nature's grace.
Jordan Chase: [on stage, to crowd] But we shall be delivered!
[audience cheers]
Jordan Chase: [amplified over crowd] It's time to tap into your primal selves and seize the power of instinct. We're gonna cast off those shackles that bind us to jobs we hate, people we don't love, lives that aren't worth living. We are going to...
Jordan Chase, Seminar audience: [like a slogan] Take It!
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] I've never been around so many people that made me feel normal.
Man in Jordan Chase cap: [muted by p.o.v] Yeah. Yeah!
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] *Really* normal.
Jordan Chase: The power of risk!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: The power of desire!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: The power of instinct!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: The power of...
Dexter Morgan: [as chanting continues, thinking] Instincts are all that I've ever had. Cole Harmon, Chase's Chief of Security: torturer, rapist, killer. It's time to tap into *my* primal self.
Jordan Chase: The power of life!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: We're gonna Take It!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: Take It!
Seminar audience: Take It!
Jordan Chase: Take it!
Seminar audience: Take It!

Jordan Chase: I have some bad news for everyone.
Dexter Morgan: [bored, brings his head forward and upright, alert, sighs]
Jordan Chase: You're all going to die.
Dexter Morgan: [looking to Cole Harmon, thinking] Some of us sooner than others.
Jordan Chase: Some of us sooner than others.
[Dexter, surprised, looks forward again]
Jordan Chase: And if you're not in touch with your primal self, you're already dead.
[Dexter sits up]
Jordan Chase: You may be breathing and walkin' around, but you're an empty shell, 'st one of the herd, completely unaware of what you truly want. And when we come back, we're gonna start using your instincts to design the life you deserve, fuel the passion to make it real, and find the power to take it.

[spoiler]
Jordan Chase: Most people wait until the seminar is over before checking out.
Dexter Morgan: Uh, I lose my nanny in an hour. I gotta get back to my son. Is everything OK?
Jordan Chase: Nothing important, just a little security glitch.
Dexter Morgan: Mm.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Like your Chief of Security's head is in my luggage?
Jordan Chase: I want to thank you for coming on stage.
Dexter Morgan: It didn't seem like I had any choice.
Jordan Chase: I know it was sudden, and you probably didn't appreciate it, but you'll look back on it, you'll realize it was worth it. Don't forget what happened here this weekend, Dexter.
Dexter Morgan: I won't.
Jordan Chase: Act on what you learned. Don't let it slip away. It's what I tell my clients. Tick tick tick? That's the sound of your life running out.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] My primal instincts were right; Jordan's one of them!
Jordan Chase: Take it, Dexter.
Dexter Morgan: Oh, I will!
[Dexter takes the bag with the head and casually tosses it into his car]

Dexter Morgan: Miguel couldn't. My father couldn't. Can anyone live with the truth of what I am?


"Dexter: The Lion Sleeps Tonight (#3.3)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: Rita's pregnant.
Debra Morgan: Say it again.
Dexter Morgan: Rita's pregnant.
Debra Morgan: You're lying.
Dexter Morgan: I'm not lying
Debra Morgan: A baby? A motherfucking rolly-poly, chubby, cheeked, shit machine? Are you kidding me?
Dexter Morgan: I've never heard it described in quite those words before, but yeah.

Dexter Morgan: What else did the doctor say?
Rita Bennett: He asked me a million questions about my medical history. There's a form for you to fill up too but I told him you were adopted. I mean... are there any details that you do know?
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Like mom was killed by a chainsaw, my brother was killed by... well... me. That kind of stuff?

Dexter Morgan: Because in the land of predators, the Lion never fears the Jackal.

Dexter Morgan: Nobody hurts my children!


"Dexter: A Beautiful Day (#8.1)" (2013)
Debra Morgan: Fuck you. Do you wanna know why I'm not returning your phone calls? 'Cause I don't wanna talk to you. And I really don't wanna fuckin' see you.
Dexter Morgan: Why?
Debra Morgan: [laughs] "Why"? Um... because you made me compromise everything about myself that I care about.
[Deb takes another swig from the beer she hasn't paid for]
Debra Morgan: And I hate you for it.
Dexter Morgan: [disbelieving] No you don't.
Debra Morgan: I shot the wrong person in that trailer.

Dexter Morgan: The victim led a quiet life. No enemies.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Serial killers don't have enemies. Everyone's a potential victim.
Dexter Morgan: Well, if you need anything else, just pick up the phone. Anybody at the lab can help you.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: I was interested to have your take on this case.
Dexter Morgan: Me? Why? I'm the blood guy.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: "The blood guy." How did you end up here?
Dexter Morgan: My dad was a cop. He kinda steered me away from that. This seemed like a better fit.
[Dexter steals a glance at the autopsy instruments]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: I was drawn to forensics, too, but chose to focus on neuroscience. Psychopaths. We both chose murder. Maybe we're both a little crazy.
Dexter Morgan: Maybe.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Mad scientists, trained to look at this as a biological mass, a body part. Yet, somehow, from all those firings of neurons, something... intangible emerges. Emotions. Trust, morality, love. Unless you're a psychopath. But even then, belief systems emerge... as with the... Bay Harbor Butcher. What was he like?
Dexter Morgan: [exhales] Who?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: The Bay Harbor Butcher. James Doakes. I- if I'm not mistaken, he worked with you here in Miami Metro.
Dexter Morgan: He was angry. Had a short fuse.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Well, that doesn't sound right to me. As a psychopath, he would be disassociated with his feelings, not quick to anger.
Dexter Morgan: Maybe he wasn't a psychopath.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Oh, yes, the Bay Harbor Butcher was definitely a psychopath. He'd have to be to masquerade the way he did. But he was an odd one, that's for sure.
Dexter Morgan: You're the expert.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Just the way he picked his victims - persons who, on the whole, had some sort of criminal background - speaks to a... strong belief system, almost as if he operated with some sort of... moral guidelines.
Dexter Morgan: "Guidelines".
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Yeah, clearly it wasn't a moral choice, as psychopaths have no conscience. So, why else would he kill that way?
Dexter Morgan: So he could...
[exhales]
Dexter Morgan: get away with it as long as he did? People are less likely to miss criminals when they disappear. Doakes was Special Ops; maybe he picked it up from there.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Maybe he did. Makes an interesting case study. I wish I could have interviewed him.
Dexter Morgan: Sorry.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: I look forward to working with you, Dexter Morgan.

[first lines]
[acoustic guitar plays What a Wonderful World]
[All action is in slow motion. Harrison throws a kite up into a cloudy sky, rainbow arcing behind a lighthouse. He runs, laughing, to Dexter, holding the line]
Dexter Morgan: [all in V.O] There's nothing like a crisis to define who you are.
[fade to Dexter hitting a splatter-skull with a baseball bat in the lab]
Dexter Morgan: A better person would feel bad about LaGuerta's death. But the truth is, it solved all my problems.
[Masuka gives Dexter's splatter pattern a thumbs-up through the observation glass. Fade to Dexter dismembering a victim on his table]
Dexter Morgan: It's gotten me back on track.
[fade to Harrison playing soccer, people cheering and clapping]
Dexter Morgan: In the six months since, I've coached Harrison's soccer team to a championship...
[Dexter, in his bowling jersey, grabs his ball-bag and heads out of the apartment]
Dexter Morgan: gotten the bowling team back together...
[a woman takes her top off in Dexter's bed]
Dexter Morgan: made some new friends.
[Dexter watches the last bloom fall off the plant by his bed]
Dexter Morgan: I'm a survivor.

[last lines]
[Dexter sits on Maria LaGuerta's Memorial Bench. Across, a kite is stuck in the bushes. A large ball, discarded food trays and disposable plates, a beer bottle, a hat, some newspapers, a Coke can atop a small sand castle, a plastic milk crate. Dr. Vogel approaches]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Dexter?
Dexter Morgan: This isn't a good time.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: [softly] I was hoping to share something with you.
Dexter Morgan: [sighs] I told you, I'm not in the mood for this.
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Well, then maybe I can just leave this with you.
[Dr. Vogel hands Dexter a manilla envelope and walks away. Dexter opens it and finds, inside, childlike crayon drawings of a family with a boy standing apart from the rest in darkness; a boy with bloody hands, knife, and animal; a body with cut and torn clothes and flesh with a knife in the chest; a name in the corner of one written in red: "Dexter". Dexter chases after Vogel and shoves her against a steel door facing him]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Dexter, please.
Dexter Morgan: What is it you want?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Please, let go.
[Dexter pushes her back against the door]
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: You can't kill me.
Dexter Morgan: Why?
Dr. Evelyn Vogel: Because I don't fit Harry's Code.
[Dr. Vogel walks away, leaving a stunned Dexter behind]


"Dexter: Circle Us (#5.7)" (2010)
[overlooking Harrison sleeping in his crib]
Dexter Morgan: Hey, good night, buddy.
Sonya: "St. Brigid, circle us with your light, so that no darkness shall overcome our world." Sleep well, little one.
Dexter Morgan: [seeing the porcelain figure, thinking] That's either a Saint or the most boring action figure I've ever seen.
Dexter Morgan: [aloud] Is that yours?
Sonya: St. Brigid.
Sonya: [to Harrison, softly] To watch over you when you sleep.
[Dexter smiles, and when Sonya turns away, takes down the figure... ]
Sonya: Good night.
Dexter Morgan: Good night.
[... and puts it in Harrison's toy box]
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] He doesn't need St. Brigid. He has Father Dexter.

[Dexter shows Lumen a picture of Jordan Chase and Vince Masuka on his cell phone]
Dexter Morgan: What about him?
Lumen Ann Pierce: [sighs] No, I - I mean, that guy's clearly a freak, but I don't know him.
Dexter Morgan: No, not the bald guy. The guy beside him: Jordan Chase.
Lumen Ann Pierce: Oh. No, I don't know him either.
Dexter Morgan: You sure?
Lumen Ann Pierce: I told you, I didn't see most of their faces.
Dexter Morgan: [sighs] Great...
Lumen Ann Pierce: Who is he?
Dexter Morgan: He's some sort of motivational speaker.
Lumen Ann Pierce: [flipping back to the first picture of Cole Harmon] This guy, I definitely know. What next?

Dexter Morgan: Well, this is Florida; we execute here. These men will be brought to justice. You can walk away from all of this now, put it behind you. You can go on with your life.
Lumen Ann Pierce: No. That's not what I want.
Dexter Morgan: I promise you, the police will take care of it.
Lumen Ann Pierce: No, I don't want the police to take care of it; I w- I want to take care of it.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] I know how she feels. It's not so different from me.
[Lumen pours a cup of coffee]
Dexter Morgan: How much coffee are you drinking?
Lumen Ann Pierce: A lot. I have to stay awake. What if they come for me at night?
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] She's stressed, on edge. The way I feel when I've gone too long without putting someone on my table.
Lumen Ann Pierce: You said you'd help me.
Dexter Morgan: I did. I just don't know that helping you kill someone is actually helping you.
Lumen Ann Pierce: [sighs] This is all I think about. Don't back out now. This is important to me.
Dexter Morgan: [sighs, thinking] Truth is, I actually want to help her... for some very complicated reasons.
Dexter Morgan: [aloud] If we want Cole for ourselves, I have to derail the police investigation, which means giving them another suspect.
Lumen Ann Pierce: Who?
Dexter Morgan: The man who actually killed all those girls: Boyd Fowler.

Dexter Morgan: Daddy's going to Boca Raton tonight. 'Cause that's where Cole Harmon lives. He's a Bad Man. I'm not sure how to find out who the rest of his Bad Man friends are. You want that?
[at a soft knock at the door, Dexter puts the sippy-cup back down as Sonya enters]
Sonya: Hi. There's my angel. Let me just set my things down.
Dexter Morgan: [to Harrison softly with Sonya across the room] Wonder how much longer I'm gonna be able to talk to you like this. Soon you're gonna start to understand me.


"Dexter: Dex Takes a Holiday (#4.4)" (2009)
[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] Everyone needs a vacation. In my case it's time off... for bad behavior. But I intend to make the most of this family trip... that they're taking without me.

Zoey Kruger: Are you the kind of sicko that likes watching a woman in pain?
Dexter Morgan: I'm not that kind of sicko, no.

Zoey Kruger: [while Dexter has her on his table] You gonna rape and kill me?
Dexter Morgan: What is it with you and rape? No one is raping anyone! Killing on the other hand...

Lt. Maria Laguerta: [Opening the door to Dexter's lab finding Dexter, Debra, and Frank Lundy on the floor... Debra and Frank Lundy are hiding from Lt Laguerta] Where's Masuka?
Dexter Morgan: ...On vacation.
Debra Morgan: He's probably in Mexico taking a donkey show tour.


"Dexter: The Getaway (#4.12)" (2009)
[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Born in blood, both of us, Harry was right. I thought I could change what I am, keep my family safe. But it doesn't matter what I do, what I choose. I'm what's wrong. This is fate.

Dexter Morgan: Hello, Arthur Mitchell.

Dexter Morgan: It's okay. Life doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be lived.

Arthur Mitchell: God led you to me.
Dexter Morgan: Hardly...


"Dexter: The Damage a Man Can Do (#3.8)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: Did you ever drop a quart of milk and watch it spill out all over the floor?
Miguel Prado: Yeah.
Dexter Morgan: There's six quarts of blood in the human body. This isn't going to be pretty.

Dexter Morgan: [while shopping for murder supplies with Miguel] I'll put together a starter kit for you.

Rita Bennett: It's the hormones. I go crazy when I'm pregnant.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Tell me about it.
Dexter Morgan: [saying out loud] That's not true.


"Dexter: The Big One (#5.12)" (2010)
Dexter Morgan: You're right.I will sob myself to sleep if I subsequently learn that
Lumen Ann Pierce: I'm so sorry.
Dexter Morgan: Don't be. Uma sugestão arquitetural.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Lumen said I gave her her life back... a reversal of my usual role. Well the fact is, she gave me mine back too. And I'm left not with what she took from me, but with what she brought. Eyes that saw me, finally, for who I really am. And a certainty that nothing... nothing is set in stone. Not even darkness. While she was here, she made me think for the briefest moment I might even have a chance to be human. But wishes, of course, are for children.

Dexter Morgan: They make it look so easy. Connecting with another human being. It's like no one told them it's the hardest thing in the world.


"Dexter: Slack Tide (#4.7)" (2009)
[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] There's a moment sailors call slack tide. When the tide is neither coming in nor going out, but perfectly still. It's a moment frozen in time. When all is calm and peaceful.
[Dexter's phone rings]
Dexter Morgan: The only downside to it is that it passes too quickly.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: Isn't that...?
Sgt. Angel Batista: Farrow's assistant. I just arrested him for the murder of Estrella Carazo.
Dexter Morgan: But no I thought...
Sgt. Angel Batista: Yeah. At first it looked like Farrow, but this is airtight. We got camera footage from the toll booth of him heading over to Alligator Alley, we got DNA evidence, we got everything.
[Dexter goes slowly into his office and crouches down by the door]
Dexter Morgan: [whispering] I killed an innocent man.

Dexter Morgan: Man has always been drawn to the sea, but it's an unnatural setting for us, a place of great danger. Tides, currents, waves, wind each presenting their own hazards, none of which can be ignored. The slightest lapse of judgment can be a mistake you might never recover from. But a good sailor doesn't fight against these elements. A good sailor works with them, using them to his advantage. While others less fortunate might be forever cast adrift often in several pieces. He always comes home safely.


"Dexter: Dirty Harry (#4.5)" (2009)
[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: Deb...
Officer Hanson: Hey you! Back behind the line.
Dexter Morgan: No, I was called here. I'm Dexter Morgan, that might be my sister.
Officer Hanson: Yeah, I understand sir, but right now I need you to step back and let our people do their job.
Dexter Morgan: No, no, I'm with Miami Metro, forensics, my... laminate and my wallet are in the car.
Officer Hanson: Then get your licence and ID, I need you to step back.
Dexter Morgan: [angrily] And I need you to fucking listen, my sister was shot, no one can tell me what her condition is and that's a dead body!
Officer Hanson: [restraining Dexter] Sir!
Dexter Morgan: [threatening] You wanna let me go.
Sgt. Angel Batista: Hanson! Hands off, he's one of us!

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] Lundy was wrong. I was wrong. Neither of us knew pieces of the puzzle were missing. Trinity's a husband. A father. He's... like me.

[Dexter opens the locked chest in his apartment and reveals to Rita a shotgun]
Dexter Morgan: It was Harry's. I wasn't comfortable having it in the house with the kids, so I kept it here. See? I have nothing to hide.
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Except for the syringes, scalpels, and bone saw hidden in that secret drawer underneath.


"Dexter: Easy as Pie (#3.7)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: [about his wedding] Should I invite Quinn? He's so... tan.

Ellen Wolf: [after Miguel asked Dexter to look into her as a possible victim] I think we all know how easy it is to plant evidence and, well, you look the type.
Dexter Morgan: [voice over] Do I see sheets of plastic in your future?

Dexter Morgan: Hey guys, I need your addresses for the wedding and I need to know if you're bringing dates.
Angel Batista: Can we bring just friends?
Vince Masuka: I never bring dates to a wedding. Best man always hooks up with the maid of honor.
Dexter Morgan: The maid of honor is Rita's daughter. She's ten.


"Dexter: Those Kinds of Things (#6.1)" (2011)
Dexter Morgan: I have no idea what 'hammer time' is... or how it differs from regular time.

Dexter Morgan: High school. A small world unto itself. Combining all the warmest elements of a federal work camp with those of a third world poultry farm. It's a miracle I graduated without killing anyone.

Admissions Director: [Dexter is on a tour of a possible preschool for Harrison] So, you are you Catholic as well Mr. Morgan?
Dexter Morgan: Actually, I'm not.
[Eyes a large crucifix noting the various wounds of Christ]
Dexter Morgan: [Voiceover:] And though it does have a certain appeal, I'm not sure it's right for everyone.


"Dexter: If I Had a Hammer (#4.6)" (2009)
[fist lines]
Arthur Mitchell: [singing] Have you been to Jesus for the cleansing power? Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb? Are you fully trusting in His grace this hour? Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb? Lay aside the garments that are stained with sin...
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] A wolf in sheep's clothing. Hour by hour the spitting image of a normal man.
Arthur Mitchell: [singing, continued] ... and be washed in the blood of the Lamb. There's a fountain flowing for the soul unclean...
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue, continued] Up at six A.M., breakfast seven A.M., work eight thirty.
Arthur Mitchell: [singing, continued] O be washed in the blood of the Lamb!
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue, continued] Study session. Shaping young minds... even on a Saturday.
Arthur Mitchell: [singing, continued] In the soul cleansing blood of the Lamb!
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue, continued] Noon, lunch with faculty. Out at three, dinner at six.
Arthur Mitchell: [singing, continued] Are your garments spotless? Are they white as snow? Are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue, continued] Father, huband, teacher, deacon, all in the name of blending in. Camouflage is nature's craftiest trick.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] I became a husband, a father, I had to evolve it was the only way to survive.
Rita Bennett: I have something else I wanna give you.
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over of inner monologue] Being myself in front of my family will take some getting used to but Arthur was right. I does feel... good.
Rita Bennett: Got it.
Dexter Morgan: Padlock?
Rita Bennett: For the door. To keep it locked.
Dexter Morgan: Shouldn't I leave it open?
Rita Bennett: Please, we have three young children. There's dangerous stuff in there.

Dexter Morgan: This is what makes a home: The noise of happy children, the warmth of a full house and the chill of an angry wife.


"Dexter: Living the Dream (#4.1)" (2009)
[to his son, Harrison]
Dexter Morgan: Oh, okay, Harrison. The driving thing didn't work, the singing thing didn't work, you planning on both of us not sleeping through another three months?
[Harrison starts crying]
Dexter Morgan: Apparently so.

Vince Masuka: Talk about your blood bath!
[goofy laugh]
Vince Masuka: Tough room. Okay, femoral artery's severed. She bled out in minutes.
Joey Quinn: Suicide?
Debra Morgan: No weapon on the premises.
Vince Masuka: The coroner can suck my uncircumcised dick if he doesn't rule this a homicide!
Debra Morgan: That's way TMI, Masuka. Employment records show she just got promoted to Sous Chef.
Vince Masuka: A total babe! And she could cook! Had it all goin' on!
Debra Morgan: And then, this.
Dexter Morgan: It's a very well organized crime scene. The assailant took his time, cleaned up after himself.
[voice over]
Dexter Morgan: Obviously doesn't have kids.

Dexter Morgan: [voicover] I had Benny Gomez on the ropes and let him slip away. No way I can go to that bar again. Officer Alphabet made sure of that. Which means I grab Benny where he lives. A higher degree of Difficulty but I don't have a choice. If I want to be around for my son, I have to do this right. I'm killing for two now.


"Dexter: Finding Freebo (#3.2)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] We're supposed to see hope in children. But right now,all I see are little bundles of uncertainty. And germs.

Vince Masuka: Step away from the incense. This is America, buddy. Freedom of religion.
Dexter Morgan: I didn't realize you were a buddhist, Vince. Japanese are traditionally shinto.
Vince Masuka: Really? Oh, whatever. I bought all this shit off my manicurist. Need all the luck I can get. Got a crucifix up there too.
Dexter Morgan: Because it did so much for Jesus?

Dexter Morgan: [Almost chanting in his thoughts] If my first stab at Freebo has gone as planned / Oscar Prado might still be alive, / Miguel wouldn't know who I was, / Teegan would have lived to ho another day, / and Deb wouldn't be chasing a Jane Doe. / And I wouldn't be watching the clock, / counting the minutes till darkness comes, / trying to get the jump on my friends in blue.


"Dexter: Truth Be Told (#1.11)" (2006)
Sergeant James Doakes: You just found out that somebody who's supposed to be your friend is going to live. Does that make you feel anything? Anything at all?
[grabbing Dexter's shoulder]
Dexter Morgan: Take your fucking hand off me
Sergeant James Doakes: Just what I always thought.

[first lines]
Dexter Morgan: I've never had much use for the concept of Hell, but if Hell exists, I'm in it. The same images running through my head, over and over.
[He remembers horrific images]
Dexter Morgan: I was there. I saw my mother's death. A buried memory, forgotten all these years. They climbed inside me that day. And it's been with me ever since. My dark passenger.


"Dexter: Surprise, Motherfucker! (#7.12)" (2012)
Dexter Morgan: Never jump the fence if you're not willing to face what's on the other side.

[last lines]
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] We all make rules for ourselves. It's these rules that help define who we are. So when we break those rules, we risk losing ourselves and becoming something unknown. Who is Deb now? Who am I? Is this a new beginning? Or the beginning of the end?


"Dexter: Go Your Own Way (#3.10)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: [Thinking to himself] Just what I ordered: feigned civility with a heaping side of betrayal. It's becoming more and more clear that I'm going to have to deal with Miguel... Option one: I kill him. But he's too high profile. A popular A.D.A. disappears. The manhunt would be endless. Everyone he knows would be scrutinized. And that includes me. He's also my best man. I'd be expected to grieve... Option two: get him the hell out of my life. But its not that simple. He taught me how to golf. I taught him how to kill. I'm responsible if he takes another innocent life... So much for option two. He won't let our partnership dissolve. He's trying to get me under his thumb. And he's using Rita to do it. It's working... Which leaves option three: get him under MY thumb and keep him there.

Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Well at least I didn't teach him how to get away with murder. I'm learning.


"Dexter: Are You...? (#7.1)" (2012)
Viktor Baskov: Is there anything I can say to keep you from killing me?
Dexter Morgan: No.
Viktor Baskov: Then get it over with!

Lt. Debra Morgan: Are you... Are you a serial killer?
Dexter Morgan: Yes.


"Dexter: Teenage Wasteland (#5.9)" (2010)
Dexter Morgan: You were a teenaged girl, right? How do I deal with Astor?
Lumen Ann Pierce: Try talking to her.
Dexter Morgan: Last time I did that, she said she hated me and moved to Orlando.
Lumen Ann Pierce: Well, now you get a second chance. Share something with her, what you did when you were her age.
Dexter Morgan: I killed the neighbor's dog.
Lumen Ann Pierce: Well, don't tell her that.

Dexter Morgan: I'm in a battle of wills with my drunk, shoplifting teenage step-daughter, and she's going to win.


"Dexter: Ricochet Rabbit (#6.10)" (2011)
Dexter Morgan: Now that I've done my job, I can get on with my work.

Dexter Morgan: He thinks Gellar is still alive.
Harry Morgan: Talking to someone who isn't there.


"Dexter: I Had a Dream (#3.11)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: Adios, amigo.

Dexter Morgan: Miguel thinks he's getting lucky; looks like he's getting screwed.


"Dexter: Resistance Is Futile (#2.9)" (2007)
Sergeant Doakes: Jesus Christ, Morgan. Jesus fucking Christ, *you're* the Bay Harbor Butcher!
Dexter Morgan: [calmly] I really hate that name.
Sergeant Doakes: Jesus Christ, man!
Dexter Morgan: [calmly] You already said that.


"Dexter: Do You Take Dexter Morgan? (#3.12)" (2008)
George King: [starring at Dexter, whistling]
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I know that look. I've had that look. He likes control. Needs it. So I'll take it away from him.
Dexter Morgan: [calmly] I killed Freebo. Sorry 'bout that.
Dexter Morgan: I tied him up, not unlike this. Stabbed him in the left carotid artery. Used his 16-Inch carbon steel bone saw to separate his limbs.
George King: [approaches Dexter immediately] I don't believe you!
Dexter Morgan: Divided them equally Amongst six biodegradable trash bags, which are long gone now Carried north on the gulf stream.
George King: You're lying.
Dexter Morgan: Usually, not now- no point.
George King: Why would you have done such a thing?
Dexter Morgan: Oh I have my excuses and justifications, but really I just... need to. Like you. You have your excuses, finding Freebo, getting your money. But you know he's dead. You know there's no money, so really you're just... a killer. A monster. The stuff of nightmares.
George King: I could kill you now.
Dexter Morgan: If you can convince yourself I'm lying, that you need to skin me to get information out of me.
George King: You are lying. You do know where he is.
Dexter Morgan: Miguel Prado tell you that?
George King: [realizing he's been played]
Dexter Morgan: He wanted me dead. So he used you. He played on your obsession.
Dexter Morgan: It probably wasn't too hard.
[laughing]
Dexter Morgan: I mean you're a little single-Minded.
George King: Let's hope you're this talk active once i get my tools.


"Dexter: The Angel of Death (#6.5)" (2011)
Lt. Debra Morgan: Maybe I do need to go to therapy.
Dexter Morgan: No more than me.
Lt. Debra Morgan: Am I that fucked up?


"Dexter: Sunshine and Frosty Swirl (#7.2)" (2012)
Dexter Morgan: I can appreciate the mind-set of a collector, but toys? Seems like a waste of a good obsession.


"Dexter: Lost Boys (#4.10)" (2009)
Debra Morgan: Hey, Dex. Where are you off to?
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Kill the guy you're looking for. Save a kid. Remember to pick up diapers.


"Dexter: Run (#7.4)" (2012)
Dexter Morgan: [Thinking, reading a message that says "Run"] I don't run. I make people run.
[Looking around, he sees Speltzer in his bull attire wielding a huge axe and coming to him]
Dexter Morgan: . However, I do run if there's a bull coming after me with an axe...
[he runs]
Dexter Morgan: .


"Dexter: Hungry Man (#4.9)" (2009)
Dexter Morgan: I'm thankful for yams.
Arthur Mitchell: Yams?
Dexter Morgan: Comfort food. Thank you all for the comfort of your home
Arthur Mitchell: Where no one said they were thankful for me. Did you Jonah? Did you say you were thankful for me Jonah? What was that?
Jonah Mitchell: I did not say I was thankful for you, beacuse I'm not
Sally Mitchell: I am SO thankful for you Arthur
Arthur Mitchell: Shut up cunt


"Dexter: In the Beginning (#5.10)" (2010)
Dexter Morgan: Despite having considered myself a monster for as long as I can remember, it still comes as a shock when I'm confronted with the depth of evil that exists in this world.


"Dexter: Argentina (#7.8)" (2012)
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Everyone wants an Argentina, a place where the slate is wiped clean. But the truth is Argentina, is just Argentina. No matter where we go we take ourselves and our damage, with us. So is home the place we run to, or is it the place we run from? Only to hide out in place where we're accepted, unconditionally, places that feel more like home to us. Because we can finally be who we are...


"Dexter: All in the Family (#3.4)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] Real. How do you show someone real love when you don't even know what it feels like?


"Dexter: Hop a Freighter (#5.11)" (2010)
Det. Debra Morgan: The vigilante: she has someone in her life, a guy who's helping her, someone that would do anything and everything for her.
Dexter Morgan: How do you know that?
Det. Debra Morgan: Honestly, I don't know, but what they're doing takes devotion. To kill someone together, that's pretty serious shit!
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] Is that what Lumen and I have, serious shit?
Det. Debra Morgan: He's risking his life. He's putting everything on the line to make what happened to her... right. As crazy as that sounds, what word you use to describe that but "love"?
[Dexter frowns and Debra sadly laughs]
Det. Debra Morgan: It's pretty fucked up, isn't it?
Dexter Morgan: Yeah... Pretty fucked up...
Det. Debra Morgan: Kind of beautiful too...


"Dexter: Everything Is Illumenated (#5.6)" (2010)
Dexter Morgan: Some experiences are so big they change your DNA.


"Dexter: Beauty and the Beast (#5.4)" (2010)
Dexter Morgan: I'm so sorry. I know I'm late.
Sonya: "Late" doesn't quite capture it: it's been all night.
Dexter Morgan: I know. It's just...
Dexter Morgan: [thinking] I killed a man in front of a witness I just had to tranquilize to keep her from scratching my eyes out.
Sonya: What?
Dexter Morgan: I'll make it up to you.
Sonya: [scoffs] I don't think so.
Dexter Morgan: What's that mean?
Sonya: It means I don't think this is a good fit, and I won't be returning.


"Dexter: Left Turn Ahead (#2.11)" (2007)
Dexter Morgan: I'm the helpful handyman. How evil can I be?


"Dexter: Blinded by the Light (#4.3)" (2009)
Andy Brightman: I'm just bustin' your chops.
Dexter Morgan: My chops are busted!


"Dexter: The Dark... Whatever (#7.10)" (2012)
Dexter Morgan: So, he still talks to you. This Bobby... the one who tells you to set these fires?
Joseph Jansen: No. That would make me crazy. AND I NOT FUCKING CRAZY! But I only hurt people because of Bobby.
Dexter Morgan: No. You're the one who's setting those fires. You're the one whose burning people alive. You can't blame on something that happening to you when you are a kid. You're not a kid anymore. It's time for you to take responsability...
[Dexter thinks for a second]
Dexter Morgan: Fuck!


"Dexter: Just Let Go (#6.6)" (2011)
Dexter Morgan: You don't know me.
Brother Sam: Yes, I do. I know about your darkness, but I also see your light.
Dexter Morgan: If there's light in me I don't feel it. I just want to hurt Nick. You don't know much I wanna hurt him.
Brother Sam: You need to forgive him.
Dexter Morgan: I don't know how.
Brother Sam: Just let it go. You can't live with the hate in your heart. It'll eat you up inside. You gotta find some peace in life.
Dexter Morgan: Nick doesn't deserve it.
Brother Sam: It ain't about him, Dexter. If you don't let that darkness go it wont let go of you. Let it go, let it go.


"Dexter: Turning Biminese (#3.5)" (2008)
Dexter Morgan: How many times have I walked down this sidewalk? Sun in my face. Cool ocean breeze on my skin. Taken a dip in the pool to relax, appreciating the wisdom of those three little words: "No children allowed".


"Dexter: There's Something About Harry (#2.10)" (2007)
[Debra storms in on Vince and Dexter as she finds out Dexter tries to get rid of his protective Detail]
Vince Masuka: Oh, she's gonna hit you, isn't she?
Dexter Morgan: She's gonna hit someone if you don't get the fuck out of here.
Vince Masuka: [in leaving to Dexter] Hair-pulling may not be manly but it's very effective.


"Dexter: This Little Piggy (#8.5)" (2013)
Dexter Morgan: [VO] Serial Killer bested by 100 lb. nanny.


"Dexter: Chemistry (#7.7)" (2012)
Isaak Sirko: What kind of animal are you, Dexter Morgan?
Dexter Morgan: The kind who hunted your friend down and strapped him to a board and put a plastic sheet around his head and crushed his skull with a fire extinguisher. The kind who is going to the same thing to you... give or take the fire extinguisher


"Dexter: Once Upon a Time... (#6.2)" (2011)
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] Wolves come in many forms. Some have big eyes; the better to see you with. Others huff and puff. Or others hide in the plain sight. I should know because, like it or not, I am one, too! That's never going to change. And neither is the fact my little lamb is becoming a little boy. Walking. Talking. Listening. As much as I want Harrison to stay this way forever, from now on, the only wolves in his life have to be the stuff of fairy tales. I can no longer allow him to see the real me. Only the version that's make believe. It's the only way this story gets to have a happy ending.