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[Evaluating Nicole's cleaning-woman costume
] Simon Dermott
: Yes, that's fine. That does it. Nicole Bonnet
: Does what? Simon Dermott
: Well, for one thing, it gives Givenchy a night off.
: There's the bathroom, take off your clothes. Nicole Bonnet
: Are we planning the same sort of crime?
: I feel like I'm going to faint! Simon Dermott
: Don't, there's no room.
: I can't drive a stolen car! Simon Dermott
: Same principle, four gears forward, one reverse.
: For a burglar you're not very brave, are you? Simon Dermott
: I'm a society burglar. I don't expect people to rush about shooting me!
: I didn't want to keep you waiting, so I got engaged to him. Is it alright? Am I on time? Simon Dermott
: Perfectly. In fact, we have ten more minutes, so if you want to go back and marry him?
: Is this how you normally work, by the mile? Simon Dermott
: I'm thinking. Look at my forehead: all wrinkled!
: Don't be such a baby, it's only a flesh wound! Simon Dermott
: Happens to be my flesh.
: [to Nicole, in the museum
] Okay, you're the boss. Just do as I tell you.
: [about to see Nicole to a taxi
] Just one more tiny favour: like an idiot I forgot to wear gloves on the job. I may have left some fingerprints. Be an angel. Before you go to bed, just give the frame of the painting a little wipe with a clean cloth, ok? Nicole Bonnet
: Certainly. Anything else? You wouldn't like a forged passport or some counterfeit money or... Simon Dermott
: Oh, no no no. Nicole Bonnet
: You're mad. Utterly mad. I suppose you want to kiss me goodnight? Simon Dermott
: Oh, I don't usually, not on the first acquaintance, but you've been such a good sport...
[he kisses her, she resists at first, than yields
] Simon Dermott
: [to the taxi driver
] 38, Rue Parmentier, drive carefully.
] Simon Dermott
: Get a good night's sleep.
: Why must it be this particular work of art? Nicole Bonnet
: You don't think I'd steal something that didn't belong to me, do you? Simon Dermott
: Excuse me, I spoke without thinking.
: Your arm is much better. Simon Dermott
: Oh no no, it hurts, it hurts. Nicole Bonnet
: It's the other arm. Simon Dermott
: The infection is spreading.
: Where precisely were you in the early part of the sixteenth century? Nicole Bonnet
: I don't know but that's not how I was dressed.
: All right, where to? Simon Dermott
: The Ritz. Nicole Bonnet
: The what? Simon Dermott
: The Hotel Ritz. It's in the Place Vendôme. Nicole Bonnet
: I know where it is. You're a very chic burglar. Simon Dermott
: [nodding his head in a agreement
: [Nicole screeches to a hault in Simon's hotel garage
] Well, we made it here alive.
: [being introduced to the museum head
] Miss Bonnet and I are old friends. We used to shoot together.
: [seeing Simon eye the Venus
] You wouldn't dare! Simon Dermott
: Fear not. I'm off duty.
: I know about their so called tests. Nicole Bonnet
: Papa, they aren't so called they are!
: That thing isn't loaded is it? Nicole Bonnet
: Course it is.
[cocks the gun
] Nicole Bonnet
: Are you armed?
: [reviving Nicole from her faint
] I'm the one that's bleeding!
: [regarding his wound
] This should keep me out of action for a week!
: Oh dear havens. I'll call you a taxi! And pay for it is that alright! Simon Dermott
: That's fine. However, if the police find my car parked outside your house. It could mean questions. I'm wanted you know. Nicole Bonnet
: Alright, I'll drive you home, is that alright?
: It's National Crime Prevention Week. Take a burglar to dinner.
: [having just driven Simon home
] Now how do I get home? Simon Dermott
: You see, you never can tell when you might need a friend.
: [bumping into Nicole at the museum
] Good morning! We meet under the most artistic circumstances.
: Look, it's early, why don't I show you the real Paris? Nicole Bonnet
: That's very kind of you, but I live here; I was born in Paris. Simon Dermott
: Oh, that's right, I forgot. Well why don't you show me the real Paris.
: Why don't you wait till you get it home and steal it then? No muss, no fuss, just a nice clean inside job? I'd be happy to offer my services.
: I want you to take a long look at the trees, the blue sky, and the river, all of which I personally loathe, which is why a juicy stretch in a French prison doesn't bother me at all.
: [after telling Nicole he won't help her
] Oh don't you dare cry! Nicole Bonnet
: I"m not I've got something in my eye! Simon Dermott
: There's nothing wrong with your eye. You're crying to try and soften me up. Nicole Bonnet
: It's not true! Simon Dermott
: It won't work. I'm too tough!
] Simon Dermott
: And meet me at the museum at five-thirty sharp. And don't ask me why or I'll hit you with a bucket!
: [stuck in the closet with Simon
] I didn't think there'd be this much togetherness. Simon Dermott
: Well, it's the height of the tourist season. Everything was book up. It was the best I could do. Nicole Bonnet
: [Simon has opened the door
] Marvelous! Simon Dermott
: No applause, please.
: [staring to change into her disguise
] Turn around. Simon Dermott
: What for?
[realizing what she means
] Simon Dermott
: They go on over the clothes!
: [regarding the Venus
] It's a fake, isn't it? Nicole Bonnet
: I... Simon Dermott
: No long drawn out stories at this time of night. Just simply nod your head yes or no.
: [crazy Senor Paravideo comes as Nicole and Simon are leaving
] Who's that? Nicole Bonnet
: [obviously lying
] Papa's cousin... from South America! Simon Dermott
: You know for someone who started lying recently, you're showing a real flair! Nicole Bonnet
: Oh thank you!
[she hugs him
: Yours is a capricious nature. Do you always blow hot and cold like this?
: [after leaving a book with some coins inside
] Watch for normal human reactions!
: I tossed a coin on the way over. *You* lost.
: [about the Cellini Venus
] Oh! She's fine. She's wrapped up in one of my old shirts, just as snug as could be. I rocked her to sleep in my arms last night. It's the first time I ever did that with a grandmother.
: Our telephones may be tapped, so I'll conduct this entire conversation in Swahili. How are you?
: There's the bathroom. Take off your clothes. Nicole Bonnet
: Are we planning the same sort of crime? Simon Dermott
: You're quite safe. It's dress rehearsal time. That's why we bought all this lovely junk.