Amy Matthews
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Quotes for
Amy Matthews (Character)
from "Boy Meets World" (1993)

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"Boy Meets World: Pairing Off (#2.2)" (1994)
Eric Matthews: Hi, Mom. This is Rebecca. It's kind of a new relationship, so don't say anything too embarrassing, OK?
Amy Matthews: Oh, hi, Rebecca. He wet his bed till he was 12. Oops.

Amy Matthews: OK, Morgan, soccer practice. Remember what we learned last week?
Morgan Matthews: Don't kick the coach.

Alan Matthews: What's the matter?
Amy Matthews: Nothing's the matter.
Alan Matthews: Yeah, you got your, uh... floor-length flannel armor on there.
Amy Matthews: This happens to be very comfortable.
Alan Matthews: Mm-hmm. Well, you're looking positively Amish.

Amy Matthews: Whose earring is this?
Alan Matthews: Well, it's not yours?
Amy Matthews: No.
Alan Matthews: Well, I-I-I have no idea. Honestly, i don't know who-whose earring that is.
Amy Matthews: Alan, sweetheart, i'm not accusing you.
Alan Matthews: Why not?
Amy Matthews: I know you're not having an affair.
Alan Matthews: Oh, you think I'm safe? You think other women aren't attracted to me?
Amy Matthews: I haven't said anything.
Alan Matthews: And, boy, are you oh so wrong. Just today at the store, this slim little blonde with a low-cut dress, she came up to me and asked me if the bread was fresh.
Amy Matthews: Alan, sweetheart, I know there are still many women that still are attracted to you.
Alan Matthews: You don't sound very threatened.
Amy Matthews: I'm threatened. I know I could lose you at any moment.
Alan Matthews: Oh, stop that.

Eric Matthews: Hello.
Alan Matthews: You want to tell us anything?
Eric Matthews: Uh... not yet.
[Amy holds up the earring]
Eric Matthews: Now I got something to tell you.
Amy Matthews: We found this in our bed. What was it you wanted to tell us?
Eric Matthews: I just wanted to say, "Happy Birthday, Mom." The other one's on layaway. Nothing happened between me and Rebecca, if that's what you're thinking.
Amy Matthews: Why should we believe that nothing happened?
Eric Matthews: Look at my face. Do I look happy?
Alan Matthews: [looks at Eric closely] Nothing happened.

Cory: All right, first you pick a girl, any girl.
Amy Matthews: Just any-ol-body.
Cory: Yeah. Then you pretend you're interested in her. Now you don't really have to be interested in her. I thought you did, but Eric said it wasn't necessary.
Eric Matthews: Ring!
Amy Matthews: That's what you told him?
Eric Matthews: What? Does it matter what I told him? I'm dead.
Amy Matthews: You had the big sex talk with him two years ago. What did you tell him?
Alan Matthews: Not that! How can you think I'd tell him that?
Amy Matthews: Alan, I'm not accusing you.
Alan Matthews: Yes, you are. You're accusing me of this, and yet you refuse to accuse me of having an affair. That hurts.
Amy Matthews: Cory, I know you look up to your brother, but I want you to go to your father for advice on this subject. Eric has some explaining to do about his own behavior with girls lately.
Cory: I know.
Amy Matthews: What do you know?
Cory: Pretty much everything. I kind of walked in on them.
Eric Matthews: [singing] Amazing grace...

"Boy Meets World: A Long Walk to Pittsburgh: Part 2 (#4.17)" (1997)
Amy Matthews: Okay Cory, you educate me. You tell me what love means to you.
Cory Matthews: Mom listen, I haven't been with Topanga for 22 years but we have been together for 16. Ok, that's a lot longer than most couples have been together. I mean, when we were born you told me that we used to take walks in our strollers together around the block. When we were 2 we were best friends. I mean I, I knew everything about this girl. I knew her favorite color, I knew her favorite food. Then we got to be 6 and Eric made fun of me because it wasn't cool to have a best friend that's a girl, or even know a girl.
Eric Matthews: Yeah, and you listened to me. Idiot.
Cory Matthews: So for the next 7 years I threw dirt at her. I like to call those years the lost years.
Topanga Lawrence: You were the one who made him throw dirt me?
Eric Matthews: You were a girl, noogie head.
Cory Matthews: Then when I was 13 Mom, she put me up against my locker, she kissed me. I mean she, she gave me my first kiss. She taught me how to dance, she always was talking about these crazy things and I never understood a word she said, all I understood was that she was the girl I sat up every night thinking about. And when I'm with her I feel happy to be alive. Like I can do anything. Even talk to you like this. So that's, that's what I think is love Mom. When I'm better because she's here. And now she won't be. So I'm finished.
Topanga Lawrence: I think it's a good thing that Cory is the only boy I've ever loved. And I was looking forward to doing all of the things that people do who are in love. With Cory. And not just with some guy in Pittsburgh because I'm there.

Amy Matthews: Topanga, your parents don't know you're here, do they?
Eric Matthews: No. No, they don't.
Alan Matthews: Topanga, your parents are gonna be very worried about you.
Topanga Lawrence: Why would they be worried about me now? They weren't worried about me when they decided to move. I told them how much Cory meant to me and how I couldn't be away from him. I guess I was too young to say things like that, that I didn't know.
Alan Matthews: So you ran away from them?
Topanga Lawrence: I ran away to Cory.
Alan Matthews: Okay... It just got serious now.
Amy Matthews: Topanga, I'm gonna have to call them.
Cory Matthews: No, Mom! Didn't you hear what she just said? Her parents don't understand her. Just like you two don't understand me. We want to be together, okay? That's what we want!
Amy Matthews: Topanga, I know you miss Cory. But to come here, without your parent's permission, that's just wrong!
Cory Matthews: How could it be wrong, Mom, if she loves me enough to do that? I mean, I'm sorry I didn't do it myself.

Alan Matthews: I called your folks, Topanga, and let them know that you were here, and that you're all right.
Amy Matthews: And later on...
Cory Matthews: Later on what, Mom? She's going back to her house? Fine, I'm going with her. We can do this again there.
Alan Matthews: Cory, you live here, Topanga lives in Pittsburgh. I didn't do it. Stop jumping on me!
Cory Matthews: No, no, Mom, I'm not jumping on you because of where we live, all right? I'm jumping on you because you seem happy about this. I mean, why don't you want us to be together?
Eric Matthews: [comes into the room] I hear yellin'.

"Boy Meets World: On the Fence (#1.2)" (1993)
Cory Matthews: [Cory has unintentionally painted green stripes on the white fence] You've been saying you wanna re-do the backyard.
Amy Matthews: Yeah, but now that I see it I'm not sure I want to go with this Zebra motif.
Cory Matthews: Well, nobody told me the paint was gonna go *through* the shutters.
Amy Matthews: Cory, when you open up the shutters in your room, does the sunlight go through?
Cory Matthews: Ya got me. I'm an idiot.
Alan Matthews: No, you're not an idiot. You're a kid.
Cory Matthews: I'm a kidiot.

Cory Matthews: Hi, Mom. Wow, dinner smells terrific, and that thing you're wearing is really lovely. What is that, a dress?
Amy Matthews: Oh, Cory, what a lovely and sincere compliment, and I know that you wouldn't spoil it by asking me for something.
Eric Matthews: Eerie how she always knows, huh?
Cory Matthews: What, do all women have antennas hidden somewhere on their bodies?
Eric Matthews: I don't know. None of them will let me look.

Amy Matthews: [Amy and Alan are standing at the kitchen sink. Amy holds the hose attachment. The water is coming out of it very slowly] See? I'm not getting any kind of pressure here.
Alan Matthews: You had to have a house.
[He walks towards the drawer to get his wrench]
Alan Matthews: Remember the apartment? Remember before the children? Before we were married? Before we knew each other?
[He smiles at Amy]
Alan Matthews: Remember how happy we were?
[Alan goes under the sink and after a moment Amy kicks him and exits the room]
Alan Matthews: Ooh! Ow! You remember when you knew when I was kidding?

"Boy Meets World: Notorious (#2.3)" (1994)
Alan Matthews: I don't care who it is. A friend does not rat out a friend.
Amy Matthews: What are you? In a prison movie? There are consequences!
Alan Matthews: Oh, what's the worst that Feeny can do?
Cory Matthews: Well, he's threatening to suspend me.
Amy Matthews: Oh, great. A big red S on his permanent record.
Alan Matthews: Oh, nobody looks at that. Who looks at that?
Amy Matthews: Some colleges that he applies to.
Alan Matthews: Any college would let you in as long as you have enough money.
Amy Matthews: Do we have enough money?
Alan Matthews: No.
[to Cory, dejectedly]
Alan Matthews: You have to rat out your friend because we're poor.

Cory Matthews: How ya both doing?
Alan Matthews: Better than you.
Amy Matthews: Mr. Feeny called. He told us he's meeting with you in his office tomorrow. He also said to ask you what it's about.
Cory Matthews: [sighs] Okay, look. I'm in this sort of a situation and I don't exactly know what to do.
Amy Matthews: Well, if you want you could talk to us.
Alan Matthews: Because we're gonna make you.
Cory Matthews: Alright. I've got this friend who's pulled this major scam at school.
Amy Matthews: Shawn.
Cory Matthews: Not Shawn.
Amy Matthews: Shawn!
Cory Matthews: Fine, Mom. Think it's Shawn. Because that protects the kid who it really is. Anyway this kid did something...
Amy Matthews: With the newspaper headline.
Cory Matthews: Yeah, could be. Now, Mr. Feeny, he knows I didn't do it, but he also thinks he knows I know who did do it.
Amy Matthews: Shawn.
Cory Matthews: Not Shawn.
Amy Matthews: Shawn!
Alan Matthews: Amy, he says it's not Shawn. I believe him.
Cory Matthews: Obviously it's Shawn!

Amy Matthews: Maybe when you get a little older, you'll realize that stunts and gimmicks are not what make you special.
[Eric comes in]
Eric Matthews: I'm dating a senior! I'm special! I am fabulous. I have a tremendous new found sense of self worth. Nothing bad can happen right?
Amy Matthews, Alan Matthews, Cory Matthews: No. No.

"Boy Meets World: Her Answer: Part 2 (#6.2)" (1998)
Amy Matthews: Well, it's the mother's turn, and I do wanna say something. I have watched these two grow up,
[turns to Alan]
Amy Matthews: boy have I, and here they are now. Adults. Just fresh out of high school. Don't know anything about the world at all... I'm sorry, I can't do this. This is a mistake. And I do not support it.
[to Topanga]
Amy Matthews: Why couldn't you have just gone to Yale?
Eric Matthews: [raises glass happily] Here here!

Topanga Lawrence: I should go.
Cory Matthews: No, Topanga, you're not leaving your own wedding reception.
Topanga Lawrence: [to Amy] I'm sorry for any pain I've caused. *leaves*
Cory Matthews: Topanga!
[to Amy]
Cory Matthews: How could you say that to her?
Amy Matthews: I'm sorry...
Cory Matthews: You're sorry? So for fifteen years you've been lying to me?
Amy Matthews: No!
Cory Matthews: No? You've been lying to me about how you feel about us, and to me about how you feel about her.
Amy Matthews: I want what I believe is best for you, Cory!
Cory Matthews: What's best for us, mom, is for you to trust us! I love her, alright? I will always love her! And you know something else, we didn't get married! Because *she* wanted *you* to be there!

"Boy Meets World: It's Not You... It's Me (#5.3)" (1997)
Amy Matthews: Cor, it's six o'clock. You're in your pajamas. Is everything okay?
Cory Matthews: I don't wanna talk about it.
Morgan Matthews: Cory and Shawn had a fight. Shawn dumped him.
Cory Matthews: Now, nobody got dumped. We just agreed not to see each other for awhile.
Morgan Matthews: You believed that?

Amy Matthews: Someone from school called. A Lionel.
Morgan Matthews: [to Cory] Is that your new boyfriend?
Cory Matthews: He-he's just this guy from school. If he calls again, just tell him I'm not home.
Morgan Matthews: That's no way to treat him! He'll dump you too!

"Boy Meets World: An Affair to Forget (#4.11)" (1996)
Eric Matthews: It's about time you kids got home. It's almost eleven o'clock I was worried sick! I had Feeny looking for you. I called the police.
Amy Matthews: Really?
Eric Matthews: Nah. I didn't even know you left.

Amy Matthews: [about Eric and Mr. Feeny] Those two are great together.

"Boy Meets World: Pilot (#1.1)" (1993)
Amy Matthews: [seeing Cory rummaging through his dresser drawers] Okay, mister, drop my son's underwear.
Cory Matthews: Mom, it's me.
Amy Matthews: Why should I believe you?
Cory Matthews: Who else would want my underwear?
Amy Matthews: Good point.

Cory Matthews: Dad!
Amy Matthews: Just the kid I wanted to see.
Cory Matthews: Mom we have a major problem.
Amy Matthews: You have detention with Mr. Feeny!
Cory Matthews: How could you possibly know that?
Amy Matthews: He stuck his head over the fence and told me while I was bringing in the groceries.
Cory Matthews: I wanna move!
Alan Matthews: Why did you get detention?
Cory Matthews: You know, you're missing the bigger issue Dad. You bought a house next to my teacher. I wanna move. I wanna move now. Get the guy with the gold jacket. I'll be in the car.

"Boy Meets World: Breaking Up Is Really, Really Hard to Do (#2.15)" (1995)
Alan Matthews: Okay, okay, family meeting. What the heck did you bring home?
Cory Matthews: [points at Amy] She let her in.
Amy Matthews: Come on. She's just a little girl playing house.
Alan Matthews: Amy, sweetheart, she's a little blonde loon.
Amy Matthews: Nonsense! Look, if I thought there was anything to be concerned about, I would be the first one to sound the alarm.
[Wendy enters holding a picture frame]
Wendy: Mrs. Matthews, I found this picture of you in your wedding dress. Maybe someday I'll get to try it on.
[She goes back upstairs]
Amy Matthews: Beep, beep, beep, beep!

Alan Matthews: Wendy, uh don't you think think, that, um, raising three children on Cory's $5.00 a week allowance might be a little stressful during the holidays?
Wendy: Mr. Matthews, we're not gonna get married anytime soon. We both have a lot of growing up to do.
Alan Matthews: Oh, well, I'm glad to hear that.
Cory Matthews: Mm. Let her finish.
Wendy: We're just grow up together!
Cory Matthews: [to Alan] You wanna go outside again?
Morgan Matthews: When you and Cory get married, will you be my sister?
Wendy: That's right!
Alan Matthews: Ooh, she's got Morgan...
Amy Matthews: That is just, so completely sweet!
Alan Matthews: Oh, she's got all the women!
Morgan Matthews: Wanna see my doll, sis?
Wendy: I'd like that. Would you excuse me for a moment?
Amy Matthews: Of course dear, make yourself at home.
Cory Matthews: Yeah, move in.
Alan Matthews: Okay, okay, family meeting. What the heck did you bring home?
Cory Matthews: [pointing at Amy] *SHE* let her in!
Amy Matthews: Come on! She's just a little girl playing house.
Alan Matthews: Amy, sweetheart, she's a little blond loon!
Amy Matthews: Nonsense! Look, if I thought there was anything to be concerned about, I would be the first one to sound the alarm.
Wendy: [coming down the stairs] Mrs. Matthews, I found this picture of you in your wedding dress. Maybe someday I'll get to try it on.
Amy Matthews: Beep, beep, beep, beep!

"Boy Meets World: Wrong Side of the Tracks (#2.19)" (1995)
Cory Matthews: Do people turn out a certain way because of where they come from? You know, where they live? Who their parents are?
George Feeny: Personally, I believe that a man, no matter where he comes from, chooses his own path.
Cory Matthews: So, really no matter who you are, you can make up your own mind about what you wanna do?
George Feeny: Absolutely
Amy Matthews: [calling from inside] Cory! Dinner!
Cory Matthews: I'll come in when I choose to.
Amy Matthews: Get your butt in here, now!
Cory Matthews: Uh, Mr. Feeny?
George Feeny: My theory bites?
Cory Matthews: I'm thinking!

Amy Matthews: You staying for dinner, Shawn?
Shawn Hunter: No, not tonight. Cor, why don't you come over to my place. My dad's broiling fish.
Cory Matthews: On the engine of his pickup?
Shawn Hunter: I thought you liked it last time.
Cory Matthews: Well, I did. It was just a little... oily and anti-freezy.

"Boy Meets World: Father Knows Less (#1.3)" (1993)
Alan Matthews: I was thinking I'll go have a talk with Mr. Feeny. I'll explain it to him, get him to let Cory take a make up test.
Amy Matthews: Oh, I'm so glad. Because until you do, you're grounded.
Cory Matthews: Does that really work? Can she ground you?
Alan Matthews: ...In certain ways, yes.

Alan Matthews: So, am I still grounded?
Amy Matthews: We'll talk about it.
Alan Matthews: Hey, that's good! With talk, I can get anywhere.
Cory Matthews: [grins] He's not coming back here tonight.

"Boy Meets World: Cult Fiction (#4.21)" (1997)
Shawn Hunter: Okay, everyone have a peaceful night. I'm going back to The Centre.
Alan Matthews: Oh, no. Whoa, whoa. No, you're not. While your parents are out of town you are our responsibility.
Amy Matthews: That means you're staying here in this house.
Shawn Hunter: Yeah. Mr. Mack told me that people like you would try to talk me out of my beliefs.
Amy Matthews: Shawn, we love you.
Shawn Hunter: He said you'd say that.
Alan Matthews: All right, fine. That's enough. Get him in the house and tie him up.
George Feeny: Shawn, these aren't beliefs. This is just a way to escape a life that doesn't have beliefs.
Shawn Hunter: That's a judgment.
George Feeny: You're damn right it is.

Mr. Philip Mack: I just want you to know that I forgive you for trying to shut us down.
George Feeny: You forgive *me*?
Alan Matthews: Easy, George, come on. He's just trying to get a rise out of you.
[to Mr. Mack]
Alan Matthews: Look, you're not dealing with gullible little kids here, now, buddy. Now you brought Shawn down, thanks, now why don't you just take a hike back to con-land?
Mr. Philip Mack: Now do you see how judgmental these people are?
Alan Matthews: No, no listen!
[He violently shoves Mack against the wall]
Alan Matthews: You see! A judgment I made a long time ago is that Shawn Hunter is the best friend that my kid ever had. And I will kill to protect Shawn Hunter from people like you.
[Alan points at him menacingly. Amy touches his arm to calm him down]
Amy Matthews: Alan, he would love a lawsuit
Mr. Philip Mack: [Straightens his coat] I think there's a lot of anger here. And I don't feel that this is a healthy environment for Shawn.
George Feeny: Well I really don't give a...
Mr. Philip Mack: Look, I know you don't respect my philosophies, but for kids who feel lost and have an emptiness in their lives, I'm here to give them a sense of belonging.
George Feeny: You can't have Shawn!
Mr. Philip Mack: That's up to Shawn. And, in any event, there are many more just like him.

"Boy Meets World: Brothers (#5.1)" (1997)
Eric Matthews: So, first day of college and I got no place to stay. Show up at the dorm I say, "excuse me ding, ding, ding. Front please. Eric Matthews. I go here. Where's my towel? Where's my room?" They tell me I'm not on the list. Like there's a list!
Amy Matthews: Eric, I gave you the forms for the housing list three months ago.
Alan Matthews: Amy, go easy on him. Our son had a little mix-up in housing. He's home for a visit. Cake?
Eric Matthews: Ooh. Cut it for me?
Amy Matthews: It's not a visit. He's back.
Eric Matthews: Why isn't Mommy happy to see me?
Amy Matthews: I am. It's just sometimes you scare me. I mean, how are you supposed to do well in college if you can't even fill out a housing application.
Eric Matthews: Oh! It's worse than that. Checked the wrong box on another form and now they think I'm an eskimo.

George Feeny: It's nice to see father and son together again, playing a spirited game of hoops hmm?
[He notices the look on Amy's face]
George Feeny: You're not happy are you?
Amy Matthews: For years now I have watched you give advice to everybody but never me. Why is that? Why?
George Feeny: You don't ask.
Amy Matthews: Eric was supposed to be in college but at the first little bump in the road he comes running back home and Alan is okay with it!
George Feeny: But you're not?
Amy Matthews: It was hard enough saying goodbye to Eric. I don't want to do it again.
George Feeny: Well, perhaps Alan just misses the...
Amy Matthews: Oh, that's not it! This is it! He's Eric's father, he's Eric's best friend. The best friend can't bring himself to say goodbye and kick Eric out of the nest. Thank you, George. Oh, well said!
George Feeny: I have problems too, you know?

"Boy Meets World: The Father/Son Game (#1.11)" (1993)
Eric Matthews: Ah, good morning! Let me give you a weekend weather update. Whether or not I have a date with Cindy this weekend depends on how partly cool I am in school today. There is a definite Vicky front moving in this Saturday and temperatures are expected to rise.
Amy Matthews: Cooling off by ten o'clock, when you're expected to be home.
Eric Matthews: Oh, mom, we both know how unpredictable the weather can be.
Amy Matthews: Don't mess with Mother Nature.
Eric Matthews: [scared] I'll be home by ten.

"Boy Meets World: Rave On (#3.8)" (1995)
Eric Matthews: You see, I knew this would all work out. It worked out for you, and it worked out for me. Guys, I want you to meet the woman I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with.
Amy Matthews: We've met. Meet your cousin, Wanda.
Eric Matthews: Ohh! Ugh!

"Boy Meets World: And in Case I Don't See Ya (#6.10)" (1998)
George Feeny: [trying to persuade Amy and Alan to name their new baby George] It's of nice Germanic background, meaning 'Look out, the sheep are coming'.
Amy Matthews: Look Out, the Sheep are Coming Matthews, we'll consider that.

"Boy Meets World: Me and Mr. Joad (#2.4)" (1994)
Jonathan Turner: Hi, I'm Jonathan Turner, Cory's English teacher.
Amy Matthews: [sees his motorcycle helmet] You wear a helmet?
Jonathan Turner: I fall off the desk a lot.

"Boy Meets World: Cory's Alternative Friends (#1.4)" (1993)
Morgan Matthews: Mommy, if my dolly is cold can I put her in the toaster oven?
Amy Matthews: No, honey. That would be a mistake.
Morgan Matthews: Mommy?
Amy Matthews: What?
Morgan Matthews: I made a mistake.

"Boy Meets World: I'm Gonna Be Like You, Dad (#7.14)" (2000)
Amy Matthews: Alan, remember how we were worried about Eric's F-U-T-U-R-E?
Eric Matthews: Oh ma, you don't have to worry about my furniture!

"Boy Meets World: A Kiss Is More Than a Kiss (#3.14)" (1996)
Amy Matthews: Are you here now?
Morgan Matthews: Yeah.
Amy Matthews: Were you here before?
Morgan Matthews: No. I was in my room for a *really* long time.

"Boy Meets World: Boys II Mensa (#1.6)" (1993)
Amy Matthews: [Morgan's dressed as a zombie] There were no Cinderella costumes?
Eric Matthews: Hundreds of them.
Amy Matthews: And you had to choose axe in the head here?
Alan Matthews: It's the last one.
Alan Matthews: Ooh! Nice hanging eyeball!
Amy Matthews: I wanted Morgan to choose her own costume.
Eric Matthews: She did choose it, Mom, she wanted to be a zombie.
Alan Matthews: Eric, 24 hours ago she didn't even know what a zombie was.
Morgan Matthews: The undead are cool!

"Boy Meets World: Train of Fools (#3.10)" (1995)
Eric Matthews: Dad, thanks for giving birth to me!
Amy Matthews: Uh, I was there too.
Eric Matthews: Oh, right. Kudos, Mom.

"Boy Meets World: What I Meant to Say (#3.3)" (1995)
Amy Matthews: Cory, dinner was over a half-hour ago.
Cory Matthews: Yeah, it was delicious, Ma.
Amy Matthews: Cory, what's wrong?
Cory Matthews: I might as well tell you. I mean, you're gonna hear about it anyway. See, last night I was out with Topanga. We were having a really nice time so I figured, why not go for it?
Amy Matthews: Go for it? Cory. Wh-what are you saying?
Cory Matthews: I went too far with Topanga.
Amy Matthews: Oh, my God. How did this happen?
Cory Matthews: She looked so pretty, Mom, and there we were, all alone in the back room at Chubbie's.
[Amy breaks a teacup with her hands]
Cory Matthews: Mom! No, no, that's not what happened!
Amy Matthews: Well, alright then.
Cory Matthews: Look, I-I just told Topanga I loved her, and she didn't feel the same way.

"Boy Meets World: The Uninvited (#2.5)" (1994)
Amy Matthews: Alan, the doctor says that the only reason you can't move is because you won't try. Now, I am your wife and I have all the sympathy in the world for you, but if you don't get your off that couch, I am gonna leave you for the first thing that moves!
Alan Matthews: Before you go, could you hand me that remote?

"Boy Meets World: Hair Today, Goon Tomorrow (#4.2)" (1996)
Amy Matthews: Honey, I'm scared for you. You have got to get out of this house.
Eric: To do what? I mean Mom let's say I do find one of these so called "jobs". I mean, with nothing better than a high school diploma the best I can ask for is minimum wage and what they take out for taxes? I honestly think I could do better solving crimes. When a crime breaks out...
Amy Matthews: Stop it. Sweetheart, you cannot just mope around the house. Why don't you go out on a date? You used to date all the time.
Eric: I know but all the girls I used to date have gone off to college.
Amy Matthews: Oh, I'm sure there is plenty of nice girls right here in town.
Eric: Townies? You want me to date a townie? Oh, that is great Mom I can see them right now. Sitting on their couch in their ratty bathrobe, watching daytime TV and eating Bonbons!
[Amy stares at Eric]
Eric: These are Cocoa Puffs and I'm a detective!

"Boy Meets World: Who's Afraid of Cory Wolf? (#2.6)" (1994)
Amy Matthews: Cory.
Cory Matthews: Alright. I'm a hairy mess. Get out your Epilady and just do me.
Amy Matthews: No, sweetheart, I was just gonna say don't forget your lunch.
Cory Matthews: It's okay, I'll kill something at school.
Alan Matthews: I sense there's something on your mind.
Cory Matthews: Well, it's just this uh math problem I've been working on.
[opens his textbook]
Cory Matthews: If a werewolf leaves a train station going forty miles an hour and another werewolf leaves at sixty miles an hour, do werewolves exist?
Alan Matthews: Is this about the wolf that escaped from the zoo?
Cory Matthews: Could be.
Alan Matthews: Cory, werewolves don't exist. Relax. It's just a myth. You know as you get older, you'll learn to seperate myth from reality.
[Alan picks up a soda can, shakes it, listening. He sets it down and then he does the same thing with two more cans]
Cory Matthews: What are you doing?
Alan Matthews: Uh, one of our soda distributors heard about this guy who robbed a jewelry store and made off with five diamond rings.
Amy Matthews: And he hid those diamond rings in five cans of soda, thus your father and other grown-ups who can separate myth from reality have been boosting soda sales.
Alan Matthews: It's a three karat diamond, babe.
[Amy picks up a can and shakes it]
Amy Matthews: I'm so thirsty.

"Boy Meets World: Teacher's Bet (#1.8)" (1993)
Amy Matthews: What did Mr. Feeny put up against your bike, his garden weasel?
Cory Matthews: One fifth of his weekly paycheck because I'm teaching one of his five classes, so come Friday I'm rich.

"Boy Meets World: Career Day (#2.22)" (1995)
Chet Hunter: Adam, I consider you a friend.
Alan Matthews: Alan.
Chet Hunter: I respect you. Yes sir, you're the heartbeat of America. People can count on you. Ya got roots! I like that.
Alan Matthews: Where's this heading?
Chet Hunter: I need a favor. My wife Verna, she's... She's out there. My heart's out there with her. Not to mention my wallet and major credit cards. But she is my wife and go after her I must.
Amy Matthews: And the favor?
Chet Hunter: Take care of my boy. Now, you don't have to answer right now. Well, yes you do.
Cory Matthews: Stay here? That'd be great?
Shawn Hunter: Dad, why can't I just come with you.
Chet Hunter: Oh, come on. The road's no place for a boy. Especially with your momma out there drivin' on it. Your place is here. In school. With Teach over there. In this house. In the company of these fine people.
[smiles at Amy and Alan]
Chet Hunter: No pressure.

"Boy Meets World: The Grass Is Always Greener (#3.12)" (1996)
Eric Matthews: Mom, hold my calls. Tonight I'm gonna be studyin'.
Amy Matthews: [sarcastic] Great. Let me get my camera.
Eric Matthews: Hey, I'm serious! I mean, I got pencils, I got notebook, I got refreshment. I got everything i need to be a studyin' fool!
Amy Matthews: Where are your books?
Eric Matthews: [sits quiet]
Amy Matthews: Did you leave them in your locker?
Eric Matthews: Yeah, either there or on the bus...
Amy Matthews: Eric, you don't take the bus.
Eric Matthews: Well, then they're safely in my locker!

"Boy Meets World: They're Killing Us (#7.6)" (1999)
Alan Matthews: [after Cory chooses Shawn over Eric as his best man] You chose Shawn as your best man over your own flesh and blood? You're dead to me!
Amy Matthews: [entering from the staircase] What did I just hear?
Cory Matthews: "You're dead to me." Your husband just said that your own son.
Amy Matthews: Alan?
Cory Matthews: Do you have any idea how scarring that is?
Amy Matthews: Alan!
Alan Matthews: He chose Shawn as his best man.
Amy Matthews: [to Cory] You scum!

"Boy Meets World: Turnaround (#2.12)" (1994)
Cory Matthews: [Cory hands Morgan a picture of a woman he and Shawn created by cutting up fashion magazines] All right, Morgan, go bring this upstairs to Ingrid and Becky.
Morgan Matthews: She's scary looking.
Cory Matthews: Boys like that.
Amy Matthews: Boys shouldn't like that. Look at these women, they're starved. They've had lifts and implants. All just to make them look like some idiotic male fantasy image of women. Where did you find pictures like these?
Cory Matthews: In the magazines on your nightstand.
Amy Matthews: Oh, you didn't open the drawer, did you?

"Boy Meets World: Everybody Loves Stuart (#6.7)" (1998)
Alan Matthews: Hey, no matter what happened, we're behind you. No matter what happened!
Cory Matthews: The first time in my life I hit somebody and it's a teacher.
Amy Matthews: Ugh!
Alan Matthews: You idiot! I thought you hit a student.

"Boy Meets World: She's Having My Baby Back Ribs (#7.17)" (2000)
Amy Matthews: Go talk to the person you love.
Cory Matthews: [Thinking for a moment] That would be Shawn!

"Boy Meets World: Santa's Little Helper (#1.10)" (1993)
Alan Matthews: What happened?
Amy Matthews: Well, Morgan was waiting in line to sit on Santa's lap, and she was kind of nervous, and there was this elf who looked like a hitman, only meaner.
Alan Matthews: What? Did Santa scare her?
Amy Matthews: No, no. He was just this nice old man with a jolly red face. You know, looking back, his face really was too red. I mean I just thought he was just overheated. Velvet is a fabric that doesn't breathe.
Alan Matthews: Amy, what happened?
Amy Matthews: Well, OK, so Morgan climbs up on Santa's lap and he asks her what she wants and she says a Suzie Homemaker oven and then he grabbed his chest, yelled "Rudolph," and fell over.
Alan Matthews: [chuckling] Are we talking eight reindeer pulling a pine box?
Amy Matthews: No, no. I think he's all right. I mean, the hitman elf gave him CPR while Mrs. Claus called the paramedics.
[Alan begins laughing uncontrollably]
Amy Matthews: Alan, it isn't funny! Morgan thinks she killed Santa Claus!
[She starts laughing too]

"Boy Meets World: Wake Up, Little Cory (#2.7)" (1994)
Amy Matthews: Sex is like voting.
[Alan laughs]
Amy Matthews: It's a privilege that you may choose to exercise, when you're old enough.
Alan Matthews: Go on.
Amy Matthews: And you don't want to vote for somebody you haven't known for a really long time or have strong feelings for. Because you may be stuck with that person for quite a while.
Alan Matthews: Yes, sex is like voting. You go behind a curtain, do your thing, and then you get to do it again... in four years.

"Boy Meets World: Shallow Boy (#4.5)" (1996)
Amy Matthews: [sees Cory reading a book on fatherhood] Oh boy, suddenly I have no legs.
[falls on the couch beside him]