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] My name is Dawson Leary, and I'm feeling kind of weary. Today is my birthday, and you all look a little bleary. The girl that I cared for left me and ran away, straight into the arms of a guy who turned out to be gay. I got the blues! Yeah! Today I woke up feeling I was born to lose! Andie
] My name is Andie, and my brother's the one who's gay. My other brother died, and my daddy went away. But I'm still Andie, and my boyfriend makes me randy. His name is Pacey, and my mom's gone completely crazy! I got the blues! Dawson
] I've been restless, hopeless and confused. This girl I told you about, she's been on the move. She's at my suprise party, where everyone I know is right now. When I show up late there, they're all gonna have a cow! Yeah, I got the blues!
] Time to make a wish? Time to make a wish, okay. I wish... I wish my mom never slept with her co-anchor. I wish that my father... would stop talking about getting a job and actually go out and get one... heh, heh... and I wish that the two of you would stop your petty bickering and at least pretend to be the adults around here. I wish that my best friend, Pacey, would just end this transformation into a do-gooder, "A" student, and all-around sanctimonious teen angel and just go back to do what he does best, which is make me feel good about my life because his is supposed to be worse! And there's Jen Lindley with her drunkenness and revolving boyfriends and her wild, wicked ways. I wanna party with you. Ah, and there's Jack McPhee - Jack McPhee, who likes guys, but doesn't mind stealing my girlfriend, tonight, ladies and gentlemen, starring in his very own version of "In and Out".
: He's in. He's out! He's in. He's out! He's in. He's out! In, out. Nice hair, by the way. Heh, heh, heh... And then of course, there's my Joey. My sweet... precious Joey... the only 16-year old in the world who needed to find herself. You - You know what? That's - That's okay. I accept that. You need to find yourself... and I accept it.
: Right? So, Joey? J-J-Joey? Wh-where's - ? Where's my - ? Excuse me. Joey? Joey? Joey? Excuse me, Mom.
[Gets down on his knees and looks under the table
: Joey, are you - ?
[Gets back up
: Joey? Joey?
: There she is. There she is. It's my Joey. Joey!
[Grabs Joey and kisses her
: Cut it out, Dawson!
[Pushes Dawson away, and Dawson lands face-down on his birthday cake
[both Dawson and Andie are throwing up in a bathroom sink and toilet respectively from drinking
: I've learned one thing from my initiation into the evils of alcohol and that is be careful what you eat because you're gonna see it again. Andie
: Uh... and again, and again, and again.
[they both collapse against the bathroom wall side by side
: I swear, I'm never drinking again. Oh God, I'm so mortified at my behavior tonight. And to think that your parents saw me this way! Dawson
: God, if I survive this night... if anybody in my life ever speaks to me again, I swear I will never let another drop of alcohol touch my lips. Andie
: And if you ever see me pick up a drink, please remind me how I am feeling right now. Dawson
[both are about to shake hands when they both lean forward and run back to the sink and toilet to throw up again
: You and I are meant to be together, Joey. Period. The end. Cue happy-ending music.
: Dawson, what's up? I came over as soon as I got your message. Dawson
: I'm freaking out. Pacey
: Why? What's the problem? Dawson
: It's almost midnight. Pacey
: Yeah, it's your birthday. In a couple of minutes, you're gonna be 16. Congratulations, man. This is a major turning point. Dawson
: Yeah. And I'm eternally lost as a species on this planet. Pacey
: Oh, this is gonna be bad. Dawson
: I'm about to be 16 years old in a matter of minutes, and I'm still... me!
: I think sometimes... you have to lose somebody completely before you can figure out what they really mean to you.
: This has nothing to do with the money, Pacey. It's about us. We haven't been friends for a long time. Pacey Witter
: You're right. We haven't. Dawson
: Ever since three years ago when you took Joey away from me. Now that really turned my life upside down. But what made it even more worse was during our senior year in high school when you, my best friend in the world, turned his back on me! Pacey Witter
: How dare you say that! You don't know anything about me. Dawson
: I think I know you a hell of a lot better than you know Pacey, since you've been trying to shed this loser image that everyone has put on you. Pacey Witter
: Hey, I'm not the one who lives in a fantasy world and wants to be the new Spielberg of the century. I went out and made a change in my life. Dawson
: How? By taking an office job selling stock? Putting on a suit and tie, and slaving away at something that doesn't intrest you? Pacey Witter
: Maybe. But at least I was good at my job. I sold many stock. I made lots of money. Dawson
: Then why I'm I broke? Pacey Witter
: Because that's life! I didn't plan this. I didn't expect this. What more do you want from me, Dawson? You may have lost all your money. I have lost literally everything! I not only lost every cent I made in my life, I also lost my job. I'm about to lose my car, my apartment, and my life that I built for myself! Dawson
: That's the thing, Pacey. Since graduation, you turned our friendship into a compeition to see who can suceed in life. You're so obsessed with shedding that loser personality that your own parents stamped on you that you destroy everyone's lives around you. You really are a loser! Everything you do will turn out bad. That's not life. That's YOUR life!
[Joey steps in the middle between Dawson and Pacey about to exchanges punches at each other
] Joey Potter
: That's enough, both of you! I can't stand to see any of you like this. Just back off! Dawson
: [to Pacey
] Fine! Just go. Get the hell out of here, Pacey, and take the spector of failure and bad luck with you before you rub more of it off on me or Joey. Get out my sight! I don't even want to look at you! Pacey Witter
: [somber tone
] I didn't mean to lose all your money, Dawson. I had no idea something like that would happen. I'm sorry. Dawson
: So am I, Pacey. So am I.
: Dawson, there's something I need to tell you. It... oh boy. This is bad. We were so getting back to becoming friends again. It's a shame to ruin our friendship this way. Dawson
: What are you talking about? What would ruin our friendship? Pacey Witter
: Money, Dawson. That's what would ruin it. Dawson
: What happened? Pacey Witter
] It's gone, Dawson. It's all gone. Every cent. Your money is gone. My money is gone. Some guy on Long Island money is gone. Dawson
: What do you mean "gone"? Pacey, that was all the money I had! Pacey Witter
: I know. Those bio-tech stocks that I put it all in... I-I don't know how this happened. I really thought Stepavich would take off. Everyone was saying that it was the sure thing. Some FDA announcement came back the day before yesterday at finding some side effects that it's wonder drug had on test subjects. The whole company is in bankrupcy. The stock is worthless. From 80-per-share to zero in a... Joey Potter
: [shocked and angry
] Not again. Pacey, not again with you! Dawson
: [also shocked and angry
] Oh, yeah right... right! Typical, so typical! Why else would you... Pacey! Why did you bluntly ignore my request to sell the stock on the day before this FDA annoucement was to take place? Pacey Witter
: I don't know. I was trying to do the right thing. I thought it would double or triple in value when... Dawson
] Oh Jesus... God, Pacey! It's the same damn story with you! You ALWAYS try to do the right thing! But no matter how hard you try to help others or yourself, you don't have the intelligence or the common sense to see all the pieces of the puzzle. You never did. And you probally never will! God, of all the the countless times you let me down, screwed me over, you really did it this time! Pacey Witter
: Now wait a minute. Need I remind you that you came to me with your dream. I didn't approach you. You approached me. You were the one that took the chance. You wanted me to help you with your dream of being a great film maker. You gave me your money to help you double it and to finance your movie. Yet again, this boils down to the fact that "I" screwed your over? If that's not a typical reaction on your part, then what is?
: Dawson, how many times a week do you walk your dog? Dawson
: What? Joey
: Oh c'mon, you know what I mean. Dawson
: Good night Joey. Joey
: Dawson... Dawson
: Good Night Joey. Joey
: Good night Dawson. Dawson
: Joey. Usually in the morning, with Katie Couric.
: All the mysteries of the universe, all the answers to life's questions can be found in a Spielberg film.
: What is your problem? Joey
: My problem is that from the moment Little Miss Highlights showed up, you haven't said one word to me.
: I actually have the possibility of losing my virginity in a high level fantasy fashion. Dawson
: Don't do this to yourself.
: Hey, once upon a time, you yourself told me that some love stories never end. What happened to that girl? Joey
: She offered herself to the boy she loved. The boy she thought loved her back. And he rejected her.
: Serves me right for being THAT girl. Dawson
: What girl? Joey
: That girl who tries to rent the movie the night before an all-important paper is due because her debilitating attention deficit disorder's gotten in the way of her actually reading the book.
: If he did meet somebody else and forgot about her than obviously they were never meant to be in the first place. See my point? Joey
: Could you be any more naive? Dawson
: Could you be any more cynical? Jennifer "Jen" Lindley
: Could you be any more irritating?
: What's a soul mate? Dawson
: It's uh... Well, it's like a best friend, but more. It's the one person in the world that knows you better than anyone else. It's someone who makes you a better person. Actually, they don't make you a better person, you do that yourself because they inspire you. A soul mate is someone who you carry with you forever. It's the one person who knew you and accepted you and believed in you before anyone else did or when no one else would. And no matter what happens, you'll always love her. Nothing can ever change that. Make sense?
: Life has no opposite. Joey
: I never thought of it that way. Dawson
: Well, leave it to me to overthink it. Joey
: You are the writer. Dawson
: This writer has decided it doesn't matter how it ends. Because fiction is fiction. For the first time in a long time, my life is real. It doesn't matter who ends up with who. In some unearthly way, it's always gonna be you and me. Joey
: It's always. Dawson
: What we have goes beyond friendship, beyond lovers. It's forever. Joey
: Yes it is. I love you, Dawson. Dawson
: I love you too, Joey. Lilly Leery
: [Scene: cut in, showing Alexander climbing a ladder and Lily standing at a window in the Leery house. Reminiscent of Joey and Dawson's childhood
] Come on Alexander, only a few more steps, you can do it! Joey
: You and me always. Dawson
: There's so much, Dawson. Both good times and bad. When I loved you, you loved Jen. When you loved me, I needed to be my on my own. So I left you for Jack. I didn't realize he was gay. Dawson
: And then I convinced you to turn your dad in for trafficking cocaine. You said you'd never speak to me again. Joey
: But I did. I offered myself to you at that party after you crashed your dad's boat. Dawson
: And I refused for some reason. So you feel for Pacey. Joey
: While you were losing your virginity to Jen. Dawson
: And then finally, we slept together. Joey
: Only to get into a fight the day after, thus ruining everything we've waited so long for. Dawson
: And then I dated an actress, you dated that Eddie guy. Joey
: And years passed, until finally, here we are.
: It's become obvious to me that in life you're either a Mac person or a PC person, and the choice defines you. Let me put it to you this way: Beatles or Elvis? Mitch Leery
: Beatles. Dawson
: See? Exactly. This is no different.
[Mitch is giving Dawson fatherly advice, before Dawson leaves for college the following morning
] Mitch Leery
: You know not to have sex without a condom, right? Dawson
: Oh, dad, please. I was the only kid in kindergarten who knew what Trojans were. Mitch Leery
: Right. Erm, drugs. Dawson
: I can't swear to you that I'll never try some variety of narcotic. But I can promise you I'll never get so strung out I'll steal your TV. Mitch Leery
: Can you promise me... you won't join a frat? Dawson
: That I can promise. Mitch Leery
: Alrighty. Question #1: "Have you ever been intimately aroused by a relative?" So, it's a southern test, huh? Jen
: #13: "Have you ever experimented with bondage?" Joey
: Joey: "Have you ever gotten cozy in an airplane?" Andie
: "... in a public place?" Chris Wolfe
: "... in your parent's bed?" Dawson
: "Have you ever caught your parents having sex?" Pacey
: #63: "Have you ever named your most private of regions?" Jen
: #69 *Everyone laughing* "Have you ever participated in..." Joey
: "Have you ever engaged in sexual activity with a member of the same sex?" Andie
: "... with a transvestite?" Pacey
: "... with a 4-legged creature?" Dawson
: "Have you ever paid for sex?" Chris Wolfe
: Does dinner count? Andie
: Question #84: "Have you ever fantasized about a friend's significant other?" *Silent* Very quiet in the room all of a sudden. Jen
: "Have you ever had an affair with a friend's significant other?" Chris Wolfe
: In my fantasy. Pacey
: Give me this. *takes magazine* "Have you ever had an affair with a friend's pet?" How come I get all the animal questions? Joey
: Okay, #100: *pauses* "Have you ever been in love? If so, how many times? Give yourself a point of purity for each time." *Joey looks at Dawson.* Andie
: Okay, let's score 'em up! Everybody ready?
: [reads a question from a HOW PURE ARE YOU? sex quiz
] Have you ever paid for sex? Chris Wolfe
: [looks seriously at Dawson
] Does dinner count?
: Pacey how could you forget to tell me that Jack was coming with us? Come on, I need some preparation time before facing my adversary who stole Joey away from... Pacey Witter
] You know what? Screw you, Dawson! This world does not always revolve around you. We can't all be the fair-haired embodiment of perfection. Not all of us have wonder-keen and genius attached to their names. Some of us, like my father and myself, are just simple-minded folk trying to make it through the day without breaking something.
[Pacey has just won a first place trophy for catching a large blue marlin fish
] Sheriff John Witter
: Well, be proud of yourself. Enjoy this moment. A loser like you probably won't have many more like it.
[Sheriff Witter walks off as Pacey angrily sits and Dawson walks over having heard everything
] Pacey Witter
: [to Dawson
] Do you have any idea how many times I set myself for that line, over and over and over again? I just can't stop myself from just trying to get one qualified, "good job, son", out of that bastard. He must be right. I really must be a simpleton. Dawson Leery
: I know it's not the same, but there are other people in your life who recognize and respect your talent and intelligence. One of them is standing right in front of you. The other one is probably sitting in her bedroom having a perky coronary in anticipation from your return from sea.
: You guys are a bunch of cynics, you know that? I mean, what kind of high school memories will you have if all you did in high school was bitch and moan about everything? Joey
: Bitching memories. Dawson
: Moaning memories.
: For so long all I've thought about was you, all I dreamed about was you... Dawson
: What happened? Joey
: I got my dream, and now I don't have anything else.
: People change, Dawson. Dawson
: They don't have to. Joey
: Yes, they do. People die, and they move away... and they grow up, Dawson. Everything changes eventually.
: I'm sitting next to my best friend in the world and my palms are sweating.
: Put this in your pocket. Dawson
: No way. Jen
: This is your symbolic candy bar. Dawson
: Why is my symbolic candy bar "Crimson Passion" lipstick?
: [Jen has lured Dawson to the shore of a forest pool, taken off her clothes and plunged into the water. Dawson is still clothed, on the beach
] Jen, you're... Jen
] Naked. And all wet. Jen
: [Shyly, Dawson takes off her clothes behind a bush. Jen teases him
] Dawson, is that a tree branch or are you just happy to see me?
: Best thing we can do is just be ourselves, carry on in our typical, usual, distracting... Pacey
: Sordid love triangle ways. Dawson
] Leave it up to you to say the most inappropriate thing possible. Pacey
: Aw, I'm always dependable, my friend. Joey
: So very not funny.
[Cell phone rings
: Hi, Christopher. Dawson
: And the triangle becomes a square. Pacey
: Well put.
: It's beautiful today isn't it, hum, how the sun just affects every breathing thing, I mean you can really see it... Dawson
: Ok, Mrs. Dalloway.
[Dawson and Joey are having an open, honest conversation, just like old times
: So what are you doing this summer, Dawson? Dawson
: Like all great romantics, Shakespeare realized love was a lot more likely to end with a bunch of dead Danish people than with a kiss.
: You know us. Just Dawson and Joey. We'll always be just Dawson and Joey... whatever that means.
: Growing up does not have to equal growing apart. Joey
: Somehow it does.
: You know, on occasions like this, it's nice that we can dress up in polyester choir robes and stupid hats, sit in the sun for a couple of hours to mark the occasion. What fashion Einstein came up with this whole outfit? I mean, is this a hat you really want to be wearing the day you know people are going to be taking pictures?
: This is in your hands; you can control this. Pacey
: This is the wrong time for an Obi-Wan moment, Dawson.
: I mean, how many truly great days are we gonna have in our lives? Dawson
: I don't know. Who knows how many you get? When they do happen to come along, though, I hope you're close by, at least for a few of 'em.
: This is so Breakfast Club! Jen
: Breakfast Club? Dawson Leery
: You know, the John Hughes movie where five kids are stuck in detention all day? Joey Potter
: Yeah, in the beginning they hate each other, and then by the end they're best friends. Jen
: Oh yeah. God, that movie stunk! Whatever happened to those actors? Dawson Leery
: Well, Anthony Michael Hall developed some weird thyroid condition, Molly Ringwald lost her gawky ingenue appeal, and the rest are languishing somewhere in TV hell. Pacey
: No way, man! Emilio Estivez was in those duck movies. Those were classic. So funny!
[Jen, Dawson and Joey stare at him blankly
: My parents live for those coming-of-age, Wonder Years moments.
: You know Dawson, it might interest you to know that I did take one film class in college. Dawson
: Was it a monumental waste of time? Gretchen Witter
: No, it was great actually. But you know what my teacher said was the most bogus line in Hollywood cinema? Dawson
: What? Gretchen Witter
: "There's no place like home." Dawson
: Wizard of Oz. Gretchen Witter
: Exactly. It's what everybody remembers about the movie, but it doesn't resonate with the rest of the story. Think about it. You know home is this desolate, gray, dust bowl of a place where some nasty old lady is trying to kill your dog. And Oz is ... Dawson
: Technicolor. Gretchen Witter
: And sure it has it's problems. You know, poppy fields, flying monkeys, ... Dawson
: Talking trees. Gretchen Witter
: But along the way you make friends. Good friends. With people that you never even knew existed when you were growing up. Straw people, tin people, ... Dawson
: And lions. Gretchen Witter
] Exactly. And you help each other realize that all the things that you want to be, you already are.
: I am well aware of the Potter neuroses. Joey
: I prefer to think of them as quirks.
: Jo, you're not a bad friend. I don't get to say it much anymore, but... You're my best friend. You always were. No matter where you are, no matter where your life may take you, and no matter who you're with... Joey
: You'll always have a piece of my heart. Dawson
: Something like that. Joey
: Yeah. Doesn't have to be a huge piece. Dawson
: No, no, no, no. Not a huge piece. Just enough. You know, tiny piece.
: Sometimes I think it's a curse to have all these great friends from High School. If all you had was four years of unabated misery, you'd have nobody to miss. Everybody you'd meet would be a pleasant surprise, as opposed to... Audrey Liddell
: ...a total, complete letdown compared to the people you already know.
: So how does it feel to have a dream come true? Dawson
: How would I know? Do I look like I'm trapped in an elevator with Kate Hudson?
: Have you developed a lazy eye or were you actively looking in my direction when you said "us"?
: So, Joey, what have we learned from tonight's 90210?
: So we're friends, and then we're a couple. And then friends again, and then we're a couple. Dawson
: So? Joey
: So what are we now? Dawson
: Dawson and Joey. Joey
: Do you think every Joey has a Dawson and every Dawson has a Joey? Dawson
: I hope so. For their sake.
: [to Joey
] You're gonna have some of the best years of your life at Worthington. And I wanna hear all about them.
: You can't choose what you love; it chooses you.
: Yeah. Less than a week into Junior year and already my life's in complete and utter upheaval. Joey
: Then I'm probably the last person you want to see. Dawson
: You're a lot of things, Joey. You're never the last person I want to see.
: We can analyze this to death later.