The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
: Oh, I love it when I'm nasty. Fidget?
[Fidget wakes up, falling to the ground
: Bright and alert as always. Here's the list. You know what to do and no mistakes! Fidget
: No-no-no mistakes. Tools, gears, girl, uniforms... Ratigan
: NOW, FIDGET! Fidget
: I'm going, I'm going, I'm going!
[Fidget scurries off
] Oh Ratigan, oh Ratigan / You're tops, and that's that / To Ratigan, to Ratigan... Bartholomew
: To Ratigan, the world's greatest rat! Hic!
[Ratigan does spit take; the henchmen turn in terror
: What was that? Bartholomew
: Hic! Ratigan
: What did you call me? Henchmen
: Oh, he didn't mean it, Professor! Henchman #2
: It... it was just a slip of the tongue. Ratigan
: I am not a rat! Henceman #3
: Course you're not. Thug Guard
: You're a mouse. Henchman #2
: Yeah, a-a big mouse. Ratigan
: I have the power! Robot Queen
: Of course you do. Ratigan
: I am supreme! Robot Queen
: Only you. Ratigan
: This is my kingdom!
: That is, of course, with your highness' permission.
[the robot is idle; Ratigan slaps it to start it again
] Robot Queen
: Most assuredly... you insidious fiend. Ratigan
: What? Robot Queen
: You're not my royal consort! Ratigan
: [to crowd
] Such a sense of humor. Robot Queen
: You're a cheap fraud & impostor! Ratigan
: [under his breath
] Flaversham! Basil
: [operating the robot
] A corrupt, vicious, demented, lowlife scoundrel. There's no evil scheme you wouldn't concoct.
[the robot goes crazy and breaks apart
] Robot Queen
: No depravity you wouldn't commit. You, professor, are none other than a foul stenchus rodentus, commonly known as a... Ratigan
: Don't say it! Basil
: ...Sewer rat!
: Fidget, you delightful little maniac! You've provided me with a singular opportunity. Poor Basil. Oh, he's in for a little surprise.
: Ah, the uniforms! Oh, Fidget, I knew I could rely on you. Now, you didn't forget anything? Fidget
: No problem. I took care of everything. Everything on the list...
[tries to display the list but, to his amazement, the list is gone
: What's wrong? Fidget
: The list... but I know I... Ratigan
: Where's the list? Fidget
: The list, yeah, yeah yeah. Well, you see it was like this. I was in the toy store getting uniforms when I heard a "aroo aroo". Ratigan
] You're not coming through. Fidget
: A dog came! I ran! I had baby bonnet, girl in bag, and Basil ch-chased me. Ratigan
: What? Basil on the case? Why, you gibbering, little... hm... hm... HMMMMM!
[restrains himself as Fidget cowers. Then suddenly calms down
] Oh, my dear Fidget. You have been hanging upside down too long.
[lovingly scooping up Fidget he walks toward Felicia's lair
: You mean you're not mad? I'm glad you're taking it so well.
[Ratigan rings the dinner bell to summon Felicia
: [as he's being eaten
] Aaaah! Not me, you idiot! No, stop, you stupid furball! Open up! Open up! You're hurting my wings! Ratigan
: [rubbing his forehead
] How dare that idiot Basil poke his stupid nose into my wonderful scheme and foul up everything?
: Now, you will remember to smile for the camera, won't you? Say "Cheese".
: You're... despicable! Ratigan
: Hehe... Yes.
: [standing atop Big Ben, having thrown Basil off
] I've won!
: [hanging from the severed blimp's propeller
] On the contrary! The game's not over yet!
[clock shifts and tolls the hour
: You can do what you want with me. I won't be a part of this-this... this evil any longer! Ratigan
: Oh, very well, if that is your decision.
[pulls out Olivia's toy ballerina and winds it up
: Oh, by the way, I'm taking the liberty of having your daughter brought here. Hiram Flaversham
: O... Olivia? Ratigan
: Yes. I would spend many a sleepless night if anything unfortunate were to befall her. Hiram Flaversham
: You... Y-You wouldn't!
[Ratigan crushes the ballerina in his hand and looks forlornly at it, then at Flaversham
: Finish it, Flaversham!
: Oh, my dear Bartholomew. I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me. You know what happens when someone upsets me.
: [reading a list of newly devised laws
] Item 96: A heavy tax shall be levied against all parasites and spongers, such as the elderly, the infirm, and especially little children.
: You don't know what a delightful dilemma it was, trying to decide on the most appropriate method for your demise. Oh, I had so many ingenious ideas I didn't know which to choose. So I decided to use them all. Marvelous, isn't it? But, here, let me show you how it works. Picture this. First, a sprightly tune I've recorded especially for you. As the song plays, the cord tightens, and when the song ends, the metal ball is released, rolling along its merry way until...
[points at mousetrap
[points at gun
[points at crossbow
[points at axe
[points at anvil
: Splat! And so ends the short, undistinguished career of Basil of Baker Street.
[Ratigan has ridiculed Basil
] Dr. Dawson
: You fiend! Ratigan
: Sorry, chubby. You should have chosen your friends more carefully.
[henchmen cheer as Ratigan reviews his illustrious career
: Thank you, thank you. But it hasn't all been champagne and caviar. I've had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable, second-rate detective, Basil of Baker Street! Henchmen
: Boo! Ratigan
: For years, that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans, and I haven't had a moment's peace of mind. Henchmen
: Aaw... Bartholomew
: But all that's in the past! This time, nothing, not even Basil, can stand in my way! All will bow before me!
] Ratigan, so help me, I'll see you behind bars yet! Ratigan
: [face gets close to Basil's
] You fool! Ratigan
: [grabs Basil by the collar and lifts him off of the ground
: Isn't it clear to you? The superior mind has triumphed! I've won! Ratigan
: [laughs evilly
[Fidget gets tired of pedaling Ratigan's airship
: [gesturing at Olivia
] We have to lighten the load. Ratigan
: Oh, you want to lighten the load? Excellent idea.
[grabs Fidget and throws him overboard
: No! Not me! Wait, I can't fly! I can't fly!
: My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy!
: Tomorrow evening, our beloved monarch celebrates her Diamond Jubilee. And with the enthusiastic help of our good friend, Mr. Flaversham...
: ...it promises to be a night she'll never forget.
[burns picture of Queen with cigarette
: Her last night, and my first as supreme ruler of all mousedom!
: Oh, Felicia, my precious, my baby. Did daddy's little honey-bunny enjoy her tasty treat?
: Bravo! Bravo! A marvelous performance! Although I was expecting you fifteen minutes earlier. Trouble with the chemistry set, old boy?
[while Huey, Dewey, and Louie are playing, Dawson gets up, but Basil grabs him
] Basil of Baker Street
: Dawson, you fool! Can't you see it's a trap?
[camera pans to a mouse trap; Ratigan pops out