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Quotes for
Esteban (Character)
from "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody" (2005)

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"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Day Care (#2.3)" (2006)
Esteban: Rock a bye chicken in the tree top. Watch out for the farmer. Your head he will chop.

Emily: I want my dolly!
Esteban: Okay, okay. Is this your dolly?
Emily: No.
Esteban: Is this your dolly?
Emily: No.
Esteban: Is THIS your dolly? Please say yes.
Emily: Um... no!
Esteban: Okay, were was the last time you saw your dolly?
Emily: At the park... last summer.

Esteban: I can't leave little people with little-er people!

Maddie: Hey, Esteban! Cute baby.
Esteban: Thanks.
Maddie: Where are the little kids! I put you in charge!
Esteban: But Mr. Moseby put me in charge of everything else. Don't worry. Zack and Cody have everything under control.
Zack Martin: [Randall rides the luggage cart while Zack chases after him] Get back here, young man!
Randall: Not gonna happen, old man!
Randall: [rides past Maddie] I'll be back for you, my love!

Esteban: Where are the little-er people?
Zack Martin: We're playing hide-and-seek.
Cody Martin: And we lose.
Zack Martin: What do you mean?
Cody Martin: They're gone!

Maddie: I'm sorry, Mr. Moseby, but I had to leave for a family emergency, and I had to leave Esteban in charge.
Esteban: And I had to take care of everything you put me in charge for, so I had to leave Zack and Cody in charge.
Zack Martin: Which means this is clearly your fault, Mr. Moseby.
Cody Martin: But rest assure, we forgive you.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: A Tale of Two Houses (#3.15)" (2007)
Hector: Your bank accounts have been unfrozen and now you are rich.
Esteban: Really? Rich enough to my pet chicken a coop?
Hector: A solid gold coop with a doorman!

London Tipton: [talking about Esteban's apartment] Why are you going to that ratty little place?
Esteban: How do you know what my place looks like?
London Tipton: Because compared to where I live, everyone has a ratty little place!

London Tipton: We can be BFFWLSAGSAL!
Mr. Moseby, Esteban: What?
London Tipton: "Best Friends Forever Who Love Spending and Go Shopping A Lot".

Mr. Moseby: You must have some money saved.
Esteban: Yes, I do. I saved about a million pestabas.
Mr. Moseby: Well, that's good.
Esteban: Except for in this country, it comes to about $1.40.

Esteban: Oh, Mr. Moseby, I should've listened to you instead of Miss Spend-Now-Save-Never!
Mr. Moseby: It's OK, Esteban. It's times like these that a man shows his true character.
Esteban: You're right. I must show that I'm strong and I'm in control.
Esteban: Oh, I want that money!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Footloser (#1.7)" (2005)
Mr. Moseby: Esteban I need you.
Esteban: When I am good and ready!
Mr. Moseby: What did you say?
Esteban: Now I am good and ready!

Esteban: [claps] That was wonderful! It is amazing how your lips and his move at the same time!
Cody Martin: That's not supposed to happen.
Esteban: Oh, well, in that case, you're no good. I am off.

Esteban: Maddie, London is treating you like a dog.
Maddie: Oh, I wish! No, her dog's upstairs in the hot tub. Which reminds me, I have to give it a massage.
Esteban: I can't believe she's making you give her Schitzu a shiatsu!

Mr. Moseby: [see Maddie's massaging London] What's going on with them?
Esteban: Well, I do not think I just talk about Maddie personal business with her employer, sir.
Mr. Moseby: Don't tell me.
[puts doll on the counter]
Mr. Moseby: Tell the dummy
Esteban: [talk to the dummy] Can you keep a secret?
Mr. Moseby: [as the dummy] My lips are sealed.
Esteban: Good.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Boston Tea Party (#2.17)" (2006)
Maddie: Ok Esteban. Who was the first president of the United States?
Esteban: It's...
London Tipton: Oo! I know this one. He chopped down a cherry tree, icky wooden teeth. Don't tell me.
Esteban: It's George Washington!
London Tipton: No, that's not it.
Maddie: Yes. It is. The guy on the one dollar bill.
London Tipton: They make a one dollar bill?
Maddie: I bet you can't name a single Founding Father.
London Tipton: Can so. My father founded Tipton Industries!
Maddie: But that's not...
London Tipton: I'm bored. Bye!
[London walks off]

Esteban: I know that one! It's when the colonist rebelled against the British because of texas.
Maddie: You mean, taxes?
Esteban: That's what I said, texas!

Mr. Moseby: Maddie we need to raise the prices
Maddie: These prices are so high I won't even be able to get afford a used horse
[in a girly voice]
Maddie: And I'm like getting my license like this year
Mr. Moseby: [looks at Esteban confused]
Esteban: She's a valley forge girl.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Loosely Ballroom (#2.25)" (2006)
[Esteban teaches Zack, Cody, Janice, and Jessica to dance]
Esteban: You must hold each other so closely...
[places magazines between their bodies]
Esteban: ...that this magazine won't fall.
Zack Martin: Excellent. You got a thinner magazine?

Esteban: Oh, my poor sister will never be a woman.

Esteban: [after winning the dance competition] I would like to thank everyone from the heart of my bottom!
Zack Martin: Uh, you mean, "bottom of my heart".
Esteban: That too.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Crushed (#1.24)" (2006)
Mr. Moseby: Please don't tell me you've lost your dog in my hotel.
Maddie: No! We're just playing hide and seek... and he's winning!
Esteban: Oh, he's very good. Marco!
[puts his hand over his mouth]
Esteban: Puayo!
Mr. Moseby: First of all, that's not hide and seek. Secondly, you don't answer yourself, and thirdly it's "Polo!" Find that dog, and remove him from the premises, or I will remove both of you permanently!
[Moseby walks away, Maddie approaches Esteban]
Maddie: PUAYO?

[Esteban, Maddie are playing with puppies]
Esteban: I'm going to name my puppy... Maria Consuelo Margurito Francesca de Ciello
Maddie: I think I'll name this one Scruffy.
London: You call those names? Prince Percival Persimmon Du Loc. Now that's a name.
Maddie: Sure, if you want him to get beat up at the dog park.

Esteban: Does he know any tricks?
Maddie: Tons. Here's his best one.
[to Scamp]
Maddie: Mr Moseby's coming! hide!
[Scamp runs]
Esteban: Oh, I know that one! But he always finds me.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: I Want My Mummy (#2.38)" (2007)
Maddie Fitzpatrick: We're going to wrap Holly in this, then get it by past Skippy so we can switch it with the real mummy, bring it down here and give it to Ambassador Pepe. He's going home in time for the iguanas.
Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya De la Rosa Ramirez: He is? Oh, man, I can't believe I missed again! I love the Running of the Iguanas.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: The Running of the Iguanas?
Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya De la Rosa Ramirez: We used to have the Running of the Chameleons, but nobody could see them.

Maddie Fitzpatrick: It's my old dolly Holly!
Esteban: Well they should have called her Scary Mary.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Commercial Breaks (#1.25)" (2006)
Esteban: Welcome to the Tipton!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Where everything is sweet!
Patrick: Try joining us for dinner, may we offer you a seat?
Mr. Moseby: [singing] Next time stay at the Tipton/The Tipton puts you on top/When you stay at the Tipton/The good times, they never stop
Esteban, Maddie Fitzpatrick, Patrick, Carey Martin, Arwin, Mr. Moseby: [singing] Because you're the star when you travel far/The food is always gourmet/At the Tipton, at the Tipton/At the Tipton, it's your place to stay!
Mr. Moseby: Check in!

Esteban: Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: To Catch a Thief (#1.11)" (2005)
Esteban: No one accuses Esteban Julio Ricardo Armarzo Hermetez
Zack Martin: No one's got the time

Esteban: No one calls Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez a thief!
Zack Martin: No one's got the time!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Cody Goes to Camp (#1.10)" (2005)
Carey: Esteban, have you seen Zack?
Esteban: Zack? Zack who?
Carey: Esteban, do you like nature films?
Esteban: Oh, I love nature films.
Carey: Did you ever seen the one in how the mother bear cares for her cubs?
Esteban: London's driving him and Maddie to math camp. Please don't eat me!
Carey: Moseby, Zack's gone to math camp.
Mr. Moseby: Good. Now they're both gone. It's like falling in love twice.
Carey: But it's worse than that. London's driving.
Mr. Moseby: Oh, no!
Carey: Oh, yes!
Mr. Moseby: We'll find the only car on the highway going in reverse.

Zack Martin: You're not going to tell, are you?
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Well, only if you do it.
Zack Martin: Grab her!
[London and Zack drag her away]
London: [to Esteban] You saw nothing.
Esteban: Okay. Have fun!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: The Ghost in Suite 613 (#1.19)" (2005)
[Esteban, London, Maddie, Zack, and Cody are seated around a table, trying to summon a ghost]
Esteban: [chanting] Ghostie...
Esteban: if I may call you that...
[resumes chanting]
Esteban: ...speak to us.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: You are...
Esteban: Maddie is channeling the spirit.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: ...dopes!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: You guys are so gullible!

Esteban: We're going to call the spirit.
[lights the candle, but it lights itself]
Esteban: Apparently, the spirit's calling us. Now everybody, join hands.
[all except Esteban hold their own hands]
Esteban: I meant with each other. Be very calm, but relaxed.
[all exhale]
Esteban: Ghostie, if I may call you that, speak to us.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: You are...
Esteban: Maddie's channeling the spirit.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: dooopes!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Hahaha! You guys are so gullible! I can't believe you fell for that.
Esteban: This beliver should be punished.
Maddie Fitzpatrick: [saying sarcastically] Oooo, I'm so scared!
[table shakes and Maddie whimpers]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: I'm so scared!
Cody Martin: [table rises] Either the table's getting higher, or the floor's getting lower.
Esteban: [hums La Cucaracha] Hmmmm, hmmmmmmm, hmmm, hmmmmm.
London Tipton: What are you doing?
Esteban: The spirit has me on hold.
[suddenly gets "posessed"]
Esteban: Heeeehuuuuuuhhh!
[makes a scary face and turns to London and Cody and talks in s girlish voice]
Esteban: She's here!
[inrehular voice]
Esteban: Oh, hola ghostie!
[gets "reposessed"]
Esteban: Heeeehuuuuuuhhh!
[makes another face and turns to Maddie and Zack]
Esteban: [in the voice of Irene] Who dares to call me in the afterlife?
Cody Martin: [to Zack] It's for you.
Zack Martin: Are you the ghost of Irene?
Esteban: [in Irene's voice] Yeeess, my husband left me, so I'm angry. Now, my spirit is doomed to languish for all eternity!
London Tipton: Does somebody smell...
London Tipton: pizza?
Esteban: [in Irene's voice] Arrrhhhh, don't ever say that word!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: I love pizza. What are you gonna do about it?
[Esteban makes an evil face]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Aaaahhhh!
[Maddie disappears ino the wall]
Zack Martin: Maddie, no!
London Tipton: Irene, I hate to be a bit of a nudge, but uh, can I have my money back?
Esteban: [in Irene's voice] You will be silent!
London Tipton: Ok, nevermind.
Cody Martin: I-I hate pizza!
[gasps when Blankie floats away]
Cody Martin: Blankie, no!
[disppears into the wall while chasing Blankie]
Zack Martin: Cody? Buddie? Oh, no. Mom's not gonna like this.
London Tipton: So, about that thousand dollars...
[disappears into another wall]
London Tipton: I'll take a chance!
Zack Martin: Esteban, hang up on her!
Esteban: Esteban's gone. Say Aios amigos! Ayayayayayayay!
[dissapears from his seat]

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Super Twins (#3.4)" (2007)
[Esteban has taken Maddie hostage]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: So, let me get this straight, Moseby is a supervillain and you're his evil minion sent to kidnap me?
[Maddie laughs]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: That's the silliest thing I've ever heard.
Esteban: [trying to sound threatening] Silence, captive!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: On second thought, that's the silliest thing I've ever heard.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Poor Little Rich Girl (#1.13)" (2005)
Carey Martin: Whatever's in this envelope
[to Cody]
Carey Martin: you're still Cody and
[to Zack]
Carey Martin: you're still Zack.
[Esteban walks by and hears this]
Esteban: Will I still be Esteban?
Carey Martin: Yes.
Esteban: Aw too bad, then I must go get a ton of luggage in room 1217.
[he leaves]
Carey Martin: Before we do...
Zack Martin: Oh no, she's gonna talk.
Carey Martin: this is important. Even if you're you and you're you, I'll still love you if he's you and you're him.
Cody Martin: I couldn't follow that and I'm the smart one.
Carey Martin: Ok, swirly heels, swirly heels.
[to Cody]
Carey Martin: You're definitely Cody and
[to Zack]
Carey Martin: you're definately Zack.
Zack Martin: Alright! Now I can go back to chilling and getting by in school.
[sees his mom's face]
Zack Martin: I mean doing my best.
Carey Martin: It's so nice to have my boys back.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Team Tipton (#3.13)" (2007)
Maddie Fitzpatrick: [returning from Antarctica; wearing a thick coat and still freezing cold] Hi g-g-g-guys. I'm b-b-b-b-b-back!
Zack Martin: Maddie!
[hugs her]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Zack! Don't let go of me!
Zack Martin: I knew you'd miss me!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Well, I'm actually still defrosting from Antarctica...
Cody Martin: Hi, Maddie...
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Cody! Hi!
[includes him in the hug]
Esteban: Maddie, you're back!
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Esteban! Hug! Here! Now...
Esteban: Oh, ok -
[does so]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Arwin! Come join us!
Arwin: Oh, I love group hugs, especially with other people!
[joins them all]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: [seeing an elderly guest walk by them] Hey, lady! I could really use the heat!
[the old lady walks away, a bit startled by Maddie's statement]
Maddie Fitzpatrick: After her!
[Zack, Cody, Arwin and Esteban attempt to go after the woman while still crowded around Maddie, who is going with them]

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Back in the Game (#2.35)" (2007)
[repeated line]
Esteban: Pushing the pause button... *now*!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Christmas at the Tipton (#1.21)" (2005)
[Mary and Joseph, two new guests at the Tipton, are about to have a baby]
Cody Martin: Isn't this weird? Mary and Joseph are traveling together...
Zack Martin: On Christmas Eve...
Maddie: And there's no room for them in the inn...
Arwin: And a child is born.
Esteban: What a coincidence!
London: I don't get it.

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Hotel Inspector (#1.4)" (2005)
Esteban: Mr. Moseby, a fax has arrived from Tipton headquarters. They are coming for a surprise inspection!
Mr. Moseby: How can it be a surprise inspection if they're telling us now?
Esteban: Because they sent the fax two weeks ago and I forgot to give it to you. Surprise!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Moseby's Big Brother (#2.8)" (2006)
[Maddie e-mailed a fake horoscope to London]
Esteban: Should we be taking advantage of poor Miss London like this?
Maddie Fitzpatrick: Please. When she had trouble potty-training her dog, she made you dress like a hydrant.
Esteban: Ooh, let's really stick it to her gooooooooood!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: French 101 (#2.2)" (2006)
Esteban: No one assaults a woman by Esteban Julio Ricardo Mon...
Maddie: No, we don't have enough time for your whole name!

"The Suite Life of Zack and Cody: Rumors (#1.15)" (2005)
Esteban: Have you heard about Mr. Moseby?
Muriel: *No!*
Esteban: Ci!