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Ernie
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Quotes for
Ernie (Character)
from 8 Heads in a Duffel Bag (1997)

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8 Heads in a Duffel Bag (1997)
Tommy Spinelli: Alright, grab all the heads. Just leave the top one.
Ernie: Why?
Tommy Spinelli: Because the top one doesn't look like anybody and Big Sep will never buy it. Now come on.
Steve: Wait a minute. I sawed off this head and you're not even gonna use it?
Ernie: Steve, chill.
Steve: No, you chill. I spent alot of time on this head. Don't you think you could have at least told me this before I cut it off?
[Tommy slaps him in back of the head]
Ernie: Ooh. I saw that coming.
Tommy Spinelli: Don't ever fuck with a guy looking for heads.

Steve: Heads up! Stop a-head. Anybody need to use the head?
Ernie: Steve...
Steve: Oh, don't let it go to your head. Whoa, whoa, whoa, you're _way_ ahead of me!
Ernie: Steve! Enough!
Steve: Hey, don't bite my head off, alright!
Ernie: That's it. I'm sleeping outside, guys.
Annette: Me, too.
Charlie: Hey, Steve; GET A GRIP. Go to sleep.
Steve: Or what? You'll have my head?

Ernie: Tell me if this sounds like a phone hanging up.
[Hangs up phone]
Tommy Spinelli: Yeah... SHIT!

Ernie: I think we better pull over, 'cause we need some gas soon.
Tommy Spinelli: Keep fucking driving.
Fern: Didn't I tell you to watch your fucking language?

Steve: This is like grave robbing - grave robbing. Or worse.
Ernie: I don't see any graves. Do you see any graves?
Tommy Spinelli: [Cocks gun] There's going to be two fresh ones right now if you don't start looking for heads. Come on.

Ernie: Okay, let's review: you've got a Hugo, a Little Joey, a Frank, a bad Stu...
Tommy Spinelli: No, bad Frank.
Ernie: That's what I said.
Tommy Spinelli: No you didn't. You said bad Stu. Stu was just so-so.
Ernie: No, sir, I said a so-so Stu.
Tommy Spinelli: You did not. You said bad Stu!
Ernie: Yes I did and everybody heard! I said a so-so Stu!
Tommy Spinelli: You said bad Stu!
Ernie: I know the names and you don't...
[Arguing continues]
Steve: Would you two stop it, goddammit! These are not baseball cards we're talking about here. These are heads! Human beings' heads!

Ernie: This university has the largest cryonics facility in the country. They've got hundreds of frozen heads.
Tommy Spinelli: Why do they got hundreds of frozen heads?
Ernie: [sarcastically] I think for, uh, situations like this.
Tommy Spinelli: Hey don't be a little smart ass, you!
Ernie: Look, they have them because people feel that maybe in a couple hundred years, we can bring them back to life, clone them a nice, healthy body.
Tommy Spinelli: Are you jerking me around?
Ernie: What? Oh my God. You just put welts and bruises over 90% of my body and now you're talking about having me help you decapitate some professor. WOULD I BE JERKING YOU AROUND?

Ernie: Are you telling us that you're gonna find a replacement for the head Charlie lost?
Tommy Spinelli: [looking through a year book] Yeah. We got some time to kill before we go to the airport.
Steve: But these are human beings. Innocent people. You can't just kill innocent people because they look like somebody else.
Tommy Spinelli: Let me tell you something, college boy, nobody is innocent. Now who is he?
Steve: He's my anatomy professor. He almost flunked me.
Tommy Spinelli: Good. Here's your chance to get even with the prick. Get me his address.
Steve: Alrighty.

Ernie: [roasting the coyote that ran away with a head] This doggy wont be doin' any more running away, I got him trained