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Quotes for
Andre (Character)
from My Father the Hero (1994)

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My Father the Hero (1994)
Andre: I'm having an affair with my phone machine.

[Nicole stands up, wearing a thong bathing suit]
Andre: What - what's that?
Nicole: What's the matter?
Andre: What are you wearing?
Nicole: My bathing suit!
Andre: The whole thing?
Nicole: What, you don't like it?
Andre: Are you sure you didn't leave part of it in the box?
Nicole: Get real, Andre. Everybody's wearing them.
Andre: Everyone's staring at you!
Nicole: No, everyone's staring at you.
Andre: I insist you change!
Nicole: And I insist you loosen up, Andre, dear.
[Kisses him on the cheek]
Stella: Now she's French.

Andre: To you I probably seem old.
Nicole: You are old.

Nicole: Daddy, can I talk to you about something?
Andre: Of course. You can talk to me about anything.
Nicole: Anything?
Andre: Anything at all. What is it? Tell me.
Nicole: Promise not to yell.
Andre: I promise. Now tell me.
Nicole: It's really not that bad.
Andre: Tell me.
Nicole: You said you wouldn't yell.
Andre: That was not yelling, trust me.
Nicole: I told Ben you weren't my father.
Andre: Why?
Nicole: Because I wanted to impress him.
Andre: What did you tell him I was? A famous pianist? A wirter? What?
Nicole: [she takes a deep breath] I told him you were my lover.
Andre: Are you serious?
Nicole: Yes.

Andre: Are you out of your mind? What the hell were you thinking about?
Nicole: You're yelling.
Andre: Of course I'm yelling! My daughter tells some stranger that her father is her, her...
Nicole: *Lover*!
Andre: Oh, God! I hate that word. It's so... so graphic. Who else thinks this?
Nicole: A few of the other people.
Andre: How many of them?
Nicole: All of them.
Andre: All of them! Incroyable! I've been walking around here with you the past few days. They think I'm child molester!
Nicole: [she starts to cry] You're yelling again.
Andre: Why... why do you make up such stories?
Nicole: I don't know. It just comes naturally to me.
Andre: So it's genetic. Is that it?
Nicole: Yes. No! I don't know.
Andre: You have to tell him the truth.
Nicole: I tried to. Believe me, it's not that easy. I care about him.
Andre: [he smiles at her] Do you love him?
Nicole: Yes, I think so. I mean, yes, I do.
Andre: Has he done anything to you?
Nicole: No, he hasn't done anything to me. Besides, if I tell him I made all this up, he'll hate me. He'll think I'm some kind of liar.
Andre: You are.

Nicole: My whole life will be ruined.
Andre: No. No, no. Your life will not be ruined. Mine maybe, but yours won't.
Nicole: He'll hate me!
Andre: No, no, he won't hate you.
Nicole: Yes, he will! I'm going to die!

Andre: How did it go?
Nicole: He's very impressed by you. He thinks you're a great guy.
Andre: [sarcastically] What a relief.
Nicole: And I told him I'm staying with you.
Andre: Isn't he jealous?
Nicole: I told him there's nothing to be jealous of. That there's nothing between us anymore because of... Promise you won't get mad?
Andre: Why do I get so frightened every time you ask me that?
Nicole: Because of your heart.
Andre: My heart? What about my heart?
Nicole: I told him you were dying.
Andre: I'm dying now.
[everyone in the balcony looks at him]
Nicole: Daddy. I told him I had to stay with you for your final days.
Andre: *My final days*? What's the matter with you?
Nicole: I don't know once I start lying, I can't stop. It's kind of addictive.
Andre: What I'm dying of?
Nicole: A rare disease you caught in Africa.
Andre: When was I in Africa?
Nicole: During the Hundred Years War.
Andre: The Hundred Years War was in the Middle Ages, in Europe!
Nicole: He didn't seem to notice.
Andre: Why not the Crusades?
[Nicole rolls her eyes at him]

Andre: Look at the Goddamn moon! It's glorious!