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: Binford Tool is proud to present Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor and Al "The Most Sensitive Guy in the World" Borland.
: It's The Tiki Hut Cookbook. Heidi
: Do you like it? Al
: I love this. Now I can make pu-pu at home.
: Scott and I are separated. He moved out two weeks ago. Al
: Heidi, I'm so sorry. Why didn't you say something about this before? Heidi
: Because I didn't want to bring my personal problems to work. Tim
: Why not? Heidi
: Because you said, "Don't ever bring your personal problems to work". Tim
: Since when do you listen to me? Heidi
: Since you said I'd better start listening to you. Al
: [to Tim
] Nice going, Mr. Compassion!
: [half asleep
] Does anybody know what time it is? Jill
: 5:00. Oh, my back. Wilson
: [about Al's snoring
] I haven't heard sounds like that since I was in Nairobi, studying the breeding patterns of wart hogs. Tim
: Hoooh! Woo-ee! Did I sleep well or what? I got some hot, cheese blintzes in the oven, guys! Heidi
: SHUT UP!
[they toss pillows at him
: If everyone were a tube lizard like you, we'd all be maytagging by now. Tim
: Maytagging? Tube lizard? A couple of brochures and you're Popeye all of a sudden? Al
: Oh, you'll have to forgive Tim. He can't help being an insensitive LOUT! Kyle
: I can't take it anymore! So much noise I can't hear the voices in my head.
: Hey Wilson, I would love to have this antique cheese whipper. Al
: That's not fair. I saw it first. I'll give you twice the asking price. Heidi
: I'll double that. Wilson
: Well, that brings us up to eighty cents. Al
: I'm out.
: Nervous about being on Tool Time Brad? Brad
: A-a little Heidi
: Here'a a trick I used when I was new: just picture everyone in their underwear. Brad
: [stares at Heidi
] I don't think that's going to help.
: Thank you. When do I start the job? Tim
: Job? We're just playing a game. There is no job. Bill
: I took a whole day off for nothing? I assumed there was a job. Tim
: Well, you know what happens when you assume.
[Bill glowers at him
: Well, what happens is... Heidi is gonna tell you what you've won. Heidi
: Uh... You won this key ring with a handy can opener. There you go. Tim
: There you go. Bill
: Yeah, that's gonna come in real handy 'cause I'm about to open up a can of whup-ass on the Tool Man!
: Heidi, my fire-starting device please. Heidi
: Here you go, Tim. Tim
: Very high-tech, it's a *stick*!