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: Do you have any binoculars? Stanley Tibbits
: What's that? Binoculars. Are you into that, too? Me, as well. I read about it in Penthouse. Just a second.
: Take me home. Stanley Tibbits
: What? Gloria Mundy
: Take me home, please. Stanley Tibbits
: Uh, sure. Um... my place or-or, yours? Gloria Mundy
: Which is closer?
: I play Detective. You play Lady In Distress. Gloria Mundy
: Hey, wait a minute. It's *my* ass they're after. Tony Carlson
: I'm sorry. You're right. That was a stupid, glib, chauvinist remark and I apologize. It *is* your ass they're after, and it's my job to see to it that... I get there first.
: Beware of the dwarf. Gloria Mundy
: Gee Scotty, I don't think there is a dwarf in this movie.
: What do you say to a bottle of wine and a couple of steaks? Gloria Mundy
: Well, you could start by saying, "Hello".
: [trying to explain the car chase
] Kojak - Bang bang? Japanese man
: Ah, Kojak - Bang bang!
[breaks into laughter
: I think we got off on the wrong foot. Gloria Mundy
: Yes, and it seems to be in your mouth. Tony Carlson
: OK, I deserve that. Listen, it's Gloria, right? You're a really nice girl and I'm a nice guy, and you're very pretty with or without cleavage, and what do you say... would you like to take a shower? Gloria Mundy
: I don't pick up strange men. Tony Carlson
: Well, that's your problem. Gloria Mundy
: So why don't you try it?
: Gloria, just sit back and enjoy the fire. I'm pouring you a nice, warm, albino martini. Here you go, drink this, then it's off to bed. Gloria Mundy
: You should have been a doctor. Tony Carlson
: Okay, we'll play whatever you like.
: Suppose that guy attacked you instead of pulling that weird stunt in the theater, huh? What would you have done? Gloria Mundy
: I would have hit him with my umbrella. Stella
: Talk about ancient! Really, honey, you've got to drag yourself into the Seventies! You've got to get some merchandise!
: Well, what was he after? Gloria Mundy
: He wanted the cigarettes. Fergie
: He was after a cigarette? Gloria Mundy
: Oh no, he wanted the whole pack. Fergie
: Man, talk about greedy.
: He told me all about Monica. Tony Carlson
: Monica? Gloria Mundy
: Yes, Monica.
[reads from note clipped to Tony's refrigerator
] Gloria Mundy
: "Darling, you are all out of milk and cottage cheese. I will pick them up in the morning. Love, Monica." Tony Carlson
: Oh, Monica. She's my cleaning lady. She comes in twice a week and really cleans the decks. Gloria Mundy
: Uh-huh. Trims the sails? Tony Carlson
: Blows the pipes. Gloria Mundy
: Will we be expecting her today at all? Tony Carlson
: No, we won't be seeing her any more. You see, Monica drowned this morning. Gloria Mundy
: Oh, really? Just like that. Tony Carlson
: Yeah. It was really sad but we both saw it coming.