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: Buenos nachos! Sasha
: I didn't know you spoke Spanish. Gordie Boggs
: Yeah, I took it in high school... a bunch of times. Sasha
: Are you fluent? Gordie Boggs
: No, I feel fine.
: I puke all the time, and I'm not a pussy.
: I'd love you to show me your awesome moves... Gordie Boggs
: Are you sure? Sasha
: I'm sure.
: How's my hair look? Finesse? Gordie Boggs
: Bro, you're driving a truck full of ass juice. I wouldn't worry about your hair.
: We're going back to basics. To find our heart. Sasha
: Can I come? Gordie Boggs
: No, because you don't have one.
: Hey Gordy? Gordie Boggs
: Yea? Sean Dawkins
: Why does it look like you have your finger in your butt? Gordie Boggs
: Because I do... stupid.
: What are ya high? I haven't seen him in two years. All I've got to remember him by is an itchy crotch. You ever see crabs up close? Wanna see? Gordie Boggs
: There's a lot of glare coming off that dome of yours, squirrel nuts! Cashier
: Listen to me sunshine, I'm gonna open up a fresh can of whoop-ass on ya boy! Gordie Boggs
: BRING IT ON!
: Give me the stuff or I'll crown ya! Gordie Boggs
, Sean Dawkins
: IT'S HIM! IT'S THE KING!
: I'll get the... um, um, um... the cheeseburger Maxi Meal. Gordie Boggs
: ...and the Brittany bare-ass buffet!
: You telling me the King's a queen?
: [Jimmy King was just asked if he intends to go for the tag-team championship
] Jimmy, it looks like you need a tag-team partner. What do you say? Jimmy King
: Bill, I appreciate it, really I do, but I think I already have me a tag-team partner around here somewhere.
[Gordy and Sean enter the ring. Jimmy points at them
] Jimmy King
: That's him, that's my tag-team partner. That's Gordy Boggs a.k.a. *the law*! Gordie Boggs
: [points finger at camera in a pose
] Gordie Boggs
: I will bust you! Jimmy King
: And here's our new manager, Sean "Sugardaddy" Dawkins.
: Hey kid! Move your fat head. I can't see the fight. Sean Dawkins
: Sorry, Uncle Billy said these were good seats. Gordie Boggs
: Uncle Billy sucks! Sean Dawkins
: Hey, Uncle Billy lost his right nut in 'nam. Gordie Boggs
: Well kick him in his left nut when you see him. These seats bite! Sean Dawkins
: If you only have one left, is it still your left nut?
: We're gonna be there! We're going! Mrs. MacKenzie
: Get me a T-shirt... a really tight one... Gordie Boggs
: That's gross, Mrs. MacKenzie.
: You gonna be a wrestler? You got trouble wrestlin' your wee-wee out of your trousers to take a leak! Gordie Boggs
: It's not that I have trouble... just sometimes I don't see the point.
: What about Wendy? She digs you! Sean Dawkins
: No... she's too much like one of the guys. Gordie Boggs
: That's bad? Sean Dawkins
: That's gay.
[both guys crying
] Sean Dawkins
: Damn allergies. Gordie Boggs
: Yeah, me too. Damn stupid allergies. Sean Dawkins
: Unfair, bogus allergies! Gordie Boggs
: Unfair, cheating, blind ref, bogus Sinclair allergies! Sean Dawkins
: Damn Dallas Page! Gordie Boggs
: That's right, Sean! Let it out man! Sean Dawkins
: Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
: All right, it's a little strange! But what are we supposed to do? Gordie Boggs
: Exactly! Sean Dawkins
: Uh... you're parents aren't dead anymore either...
: You guys better get out of here. My dad'll shoot you. He will.
: Give us a "Rule You" please? C'mon! Gordie Boggs
: No, no, no, wait, give us a "Be Gone!" Jimmy King
: How bout this... GO GET MY DAMN BEER YOU FRIGGIN MORONS!
: Crown us. Crown us, c'mon. Gordie Boggs
: Crown us! Sean Dawkins
: Please crown us! Gordie Boggs
: CROWN US! Jimmy King
[Bashes Sean and Gordie's heads
] Gordie Boggs
: Aw, that was great, man! Jimmy King
: Ya happy now?
[Sean and Gordie sleep and snores
: But, Dad, it's my dream! Mr. Boggs
: Well, your dream is stupid!
: Tonight we rejoice! We rejoice with the King in his motorcastle! Gordie Boggs
: You can not run away. You've got a major fight and you've got major responsabilities. Jimmy King
: Look, I got news for you. I sucker-punched last night. It'll never happen again it was a fluke! Sean Dawkins
: How can you say that? We got you this far didn't we? Huh> Now we got a friend, who's gonna get you a trainer. Jimmy King
: *Trainer!* I don't a trainer! I need a safehouse, baby! Or a new identity from the F.B.I. or like, a fast car that's what I need! Gordie Boggs
: Jimmy King does not get sacred. Jimmy King does not back down! Jimmy King
: Look don't you get it? Sinclair wants to *kill* me. So I'm dead! And burried in the ground and little tiny bugs feastin' on my ass, that's what he wants! Sean Dawkins
: No bugs are gonna feast on your ass!
: Look, I know we just got all this religion, but I got a serious question I need to ask you and I need a serious answer, swear to god? Gordie Boggs
: Swear to god. Sean Dawkins
: How many times did you fart in that van? Gordie Boggs
: Wasn't me man, swear to god. Sean Dawkins
: Me either, swear to god. Gordie Boggs
: Oh my god. They are the farting nuns.
[after kicking Diamond Dallas Page off the third cage, Sting swings down to meet Gordie and Sean
] Steve Borden
: Jimmy King's alright by me. Sean Dawkins
: You love Jimmy King. I love Jimmy King. We're men, but we're not afraid to say it; we love other men.
[Confused look on Sting's face
] Sean Dawkins
: [Arms open
] I love you.
[Sting punches him out. An excited Gordie approaches Sting
] Gordie Boggs
: Me too, man. Hit me! Hit me! My turn!
[Sting knocks out Gordie
[Sean and Gordie have crashed their truck and lost their jobs as anti-septic workers
] Sean Dawkins
: That truck and that business was all my dad left me when he died. That's all I've got to remember him by. Gordie Boggs
: I'll be able to remember my dad by the epic beating he gives me for coming home late.