Gordie Boggs
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Quotes for
Gordie Boggs (Character)
from Ready to Rumble (2000)

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Ready to Rumble (2000)
Gordie Boggs: Buenos nachos!
Sasha: I didn't know you spoke Spanish.
Gordie Boggs: Yeah, I took it in high school... a bunch of times.
Sasha: Are you fluent?
Gordie Boggs: No, I feel fine.

Gordie Boggs: I puke all the time, and I'm not a pussy.

Sasha: I'd love you to show me your awesome moves...
Gordie Boggs: Are you sure?
Sasha: I'm sure.

Sean Dawkins: How's my hair look? Finesse?
Gordie Boggs: Bro, you're driving a truck full of ass juice. I wouldn't worry about your hair.

Gordie Boggs: We're going back to basics. To find our heart.
Sasha: Can I come?
Gordie Boggs: No, because you don't have one.

Sean Dawkins: Hey Gordy?
Gordie Boggs: Yea?
Sean Dawkins: Why does it look like you have your finger in your butt?
Gordie Boggs: Because I do... stupid.

Eugenia King: What are ya high? I haven't seen him in two years. All I've got to remember him by is an itchy crotch. You ever see crabs up close? Wanna see?
Gordie Boggs: Fantastic!

Gordie Boggs: There's a lot of glare coming off that dome of yours, squirrel nuts!
Cashier: Listen to me sunshine, I'm gonna open up a fresh can of whoop-ass on ya boy!
Gordie Boggs: BRING IT ON!

Jimmy King: Give me the stuff or I'll crown ya!
Gordie Boggs, Sean Dawkins: IT'S HIM! IT'S THE KING!

Sean Dawkins: I'll get the... um, um, um... the cheeseburger Maxi Meal.
Gordie Boggs: ...and the Brittany bare-ass buffet!

Gordie Boggs: You telling me the King's a queen?

Goldberg: [Jimmy King was just asked if he intends to go for the tag-team championship] Jimmy, it looks like you need a tag-team partner. What do you say?
Jimmy King: Bill, I appreciate it, really I do, but I think I already have me a tag-team partner around here somewhere.
[Gordy and Sean enter the ring. Jimmy points at them]
Jimmy King: That's him, that's my tag-team partner. That's Gordy Boggs a.k.a. *the law*!
Gordie Boggs: [points finger at camera in a pose]
[shouts]
Gordie Boggs: I will bust you!
Jimmy King: And here's our new manager, Sean "Sugardaddy" Dawkins.

Gordie Boggs: Hey kid! Move your fat head. I can't see the fight.
Sean Dawkins: Sorry, Uncle Billy said these were good seats.
Gordie Boggs: Uncle Billy sucks!
Sean Dawkins: Hey, Uncle Billy lost his right nut in 'nam.
Gordie Boggs: Well kick him in his left nut when you see him. These seats bite!
Sean Dawkins: If you only have one left, is it still your left nut?

Sean Dawkins: We're gonna be there! We're going!
Mrs. MacKenzie: Get me a T-shirt... a really tight one...
Gordie Boggs: That's gross, Mrs. MacKenzie.

Mr. Boggs: You gonna be a wrestler? You got trouble wrestlin' your wee-wee out of your trousers to take a leak!
Gordie Boggs: It's not that I have trouble... just sometimes I don't see the point.

Gordie Boggs: What about Wendy? She digs you!
Sean Dawkins: No... she's too much like one of the guys.
Gordie Boggs: That's bad?
Sean Dawkins: That's gay.

[both guys crying]
Sean Dawkins: Damn allergies.
Gordie Boggs: Yeah, me too. Damn stupid allergies.
Sean Dawkins: Unfair, bogus allergies!
Gordie Boggs: Unfair, cheating, blind ref, bogus Sinclair allergies!
Sean Dawkins: Damn Dallas Page!
Gordie Boggs: That's right, Sean! Let it out man!
Sean Dawkins: Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!

Sean Dawkins: All right, it's a little strange! But what are we supposed to do?
Gordie Boggs: Exactly!
Sean Dawkins: *What*?

Gordie Boggs: Uh... you're parents aren't dead anymore either...

Gordie Boggs: You guys better get out of here. My dad'll shoot you. He will.

Sean Dawkins: Give us a "Rule You" please? C'mon!
Gordie Boggs: No, no, no, wait, give us a "Be Gone!"
Jimmy King: How bout this... GO GET MY DAMN BEER YOU FRIGGIN MORONS!

Sean Dawkins: Crown us. Crown us, c'mon.
Gordie Boggs: Crown us!
Sean Dawkins: Please crown us!
Gordie Boggs: CROWN US!
Jimmy King: Yeah!
[Bashes Sean and Gordie's heads]
Gordie Boggs: Aw, that was great, man!
Jimmy King: Ya happy now?
[Sean and Gordie sleep and snores]

Gordie Boggs: But, Dad, it's my dream!
Mr. Boggs: Well, your dream is stupid!

Sean Dawkins: Tonight we rejoice! We rejoice with the King in his motorcastle!
Gordie Boggs: PARTYYY!

Sean Dawkins: You can not run away. You've got a major fight and you've got major responsabilities.
Jimmy King: Look, I got news for you. I sucker-punched last night. It'll never happen again it was a fluke!
Sean Dawkins: How can you say that? We got you this far didn't we? Huh> Now we got a friend, who's gonna get you a trainer.
Jimmy King: *Trainer!* I don't a trainer! I need a safehouse, baby! Or a new identity from the F.B.I. or like, a fast car that's what I need!
Gordie Boggs: Jimmy King does not get sacred. Jimmy King does not back down!
Jimmy King: Look don't you get it? Sinclair wants to *kill* me. So I'm dead! And burried in the ground and little tiny bugs feastin' on my ass, that's what he wants!
Sean Dawkins: No bugs are gonna feast on your ass!

Sean Dawkins: Look, I know we just got all this religion, but I got a serious question I need to ask you and I need a serious answer, swear to god?
Gordie Boggs: Swear to god.
Sean Dawkins: How many times did you fart in that van?
Gordie Boggs: Wasn't me man, swear to god.
Sean Dawkins: Me either, swear to god.
Gordie Boggs: Oh my god. They are the farting nuns.

[after kicking Diamond Dallas Page off the third cage, Sting swings down to meet Gordie and Sean]
Steve Borden: Jimmy King's alright by me.
Sean Dawkins: You love Jimmy King. I love Jimmy King. We're men, but we're not afraid to say it; we love other men.
[Confused look on Sting's face]
Sean Dawkins: [Arms open] I love you.
[Sting punches him out. An excited Gordie approaches Sting]
Gordie Boggs: Me too, man. Hit me! Hit me! My turn!
[Sting knocks out Gordie]

[Sean and Gordie have crashed their truck and lost their jobs as anti-septic workers]
Sean Dawkins: That truck and that business was all my dad left me when he died. That's all I've got to remember him by.
Gordie Boggs: I'll be able to remember my dad by the epic beating he gives me for coming home late.