Oliver Morris
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Quotes for
Oliver Morris (Character)
from "Coupling" (2000)

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"Coupling: Bed Time (#4.3)" (2004)
[Oliver gets out of the elevator, and decides to check himself out in the mirror. The sweater he is wearing to cover his nipples says "Bring Back Doctor Who."]
Oliver Morris: Shit!
[Oliver takes the sweater off and throws it in the elevator. He touches his chest, and realises he's half naked. He tries to open the lift doors without success. Behind him, the door opens. He looks around, covering his nipples.]
Jane: Hello, Oliver.
Oliver Morris: Hello, Jane.
Jane: Well, you found the place all right, then.
Oliver Morris: [trying to sound macho] Yeah. No problem. Cool.
[pause]
Jane: Oliver.
Oliver Morris: Yes, Jane?
[pause]
Jane: Is there something you want to tell me?
[pause]
Oliver Morris: I have miniature erections.


"Coupling: Circus of the Epidurals (#4.4)" (2004)
[Oliver is trying to make fun of the fact that his pregnant ex-girlfriend's boyfriend is not attending antenatal class with her]
Oliver Morris: [sarcastically] Where is he then? What's the problem? Shy, is he? Afraid? Ashamed? Really, really ugly?
Tamsin: [angrily] Dead!
Oliver Morris: [contritely] Dead if fact. He's dead. That's where Tamsin's boyfriend is. Dead. That's the whole story. Move along now, nothing to see here. She probably wants to deal with in on her own.
Tamsin: Oh, for God's sake!
[runs off]
Oliver Morris: [to others in class] Okay, everyone, we're not doing the laughing now. That's a no on the laghing. Laughing is canceled because of the whole death aspect.
Tamsin: [returning] Oliver, he's not really dead. I just wanted you to make a prat of yourself.
Oliver Morris: Ohay, he's not dead now, and I'm just making a prat of myself.
Steve: Well, maybe you want to try not do that.
Oliver Morris: Sorry. Can't stop. On a roll.