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Quotes for
Ma Kelly (Character)
from Johnny Dangerously (1984)

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Johnny Dangerously (1984)
Ma Kelly: The Lower East Side. This really sucks.

Ma Kelly: Bless the saints, it's an ashtray! I've been thinking of taking up smoking. This clinches it!

Ma Kelly: I know what you can't say. You wanna get laid.
Tommy Kelly: Mom!
Ma Kelly: You wanna hump your brains out.
Tommy Kelly: [Tommy clamps his hands over Sally's ears]
Ma Kelly: [does mock pushups] Baboom, baboom, baboom, baboom!
Tommy Kelly: [Tommy drags Sally from the room]

Ma Kelly: You've gotten to be like a daughter to me and I wanna share somethin' with ya.
Lil: Awww, what's that Mom Kelley?
Ma Kelly: I go both ways.
Lil: Oh.

Ma Kelly: I love him, but someday I'm gonna knock him on his ass.

[Ma Kelly is pouring drinks for everybody]
Tommy Kelly: Mom, it's prohibition!
Ma Kelly: Oh, shut up! Stop acting like some fag choir boy!

Ma Kelly: With a father like "Killer" Kelly, it's a wonder neither of you turned out to be a piece 'o shit criminal!

[Johnny sees a steaming pot on the stove]
Johnny Dangerously: Whatcha cookin' here ma?
Ma Kelly: Beer.
Johnny Dangerously: With noodles! Great idea!

Tommy Kelly: [Ma Kelly pours a shot for Tommy] Mom, it's Prohibition.
Ma Kelly: Aw, shut up! Stop acting like a fag choir boy.

Ma Kelly: Open up! It's Ma Kelly!
Mary-Margaret Catharine Dineen: [opens her door] What do you want? Get out of here.
Ma Kelly: I got to talk to you.
Mary-Margaret Catharine Dineen: We don't have nothing to say to each other.
Ma Kelly: We got plenty to say to each other. We got a lot in common.
Mary-Margaret Catharine Dineen: Yeah, what?
Ma Kelly: We both scrub floors. We're both swell lookers. And neither one of us is Chinese.

Johnny Dangerously: Ma, you got to take better care of yourself. I don't want you living like this. I don't want you doing other people's laundry.
Ma Kelly: What are you saying? Give up me career?