Jonas Nightengale
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Quotes for
Jonas Nightengale (Character)
from Leap of Faith (1992)

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Leap of Faith (1992)
Jonas: A twelve-gauge, double-barreled, grenade-launcher of LOVE!

Jonas: Yakety yak, God's talking back!

Jane: You really don't care about anybody or anything except yourself, do you?
Jonas: Oh, Jane... I never pretended I did.

Jonas: Death's a breeze. Ever hear someone come back to complain?

Jonas: Hey boss. Remember me? Jack Newton. Got a question for you. Why did you make so many suckers? You say, 'love never endeth.' I say love never started. You say 'the meek shall inherit the earth.' And I say all the meek can count on is getting the short end of the stick. You say, 'is there one among you who is pure of heart?' and I say not one.

Jonas: What did the doctors tell you about your legs?
Boyd: The doctors have nothing to do with my legs. I'll walk if it's God's will.
Jonas: God doesn't have a trucker's license.
Boyd: I believe that things happen for a reason.
Jonas: You believe that. I'm gonna run.

Jonas: A woman is like a slingshot. The greater the resistance, the further you can get with her.

Jonas: A town this deep in the crapper's got nowhere to turn but GOD!

Jonas: Look, I run a show here. It's a lot of smoke and noise and it's strictly for the suckers. I've been pulling one kind of scam or another since I was your age, and if there's one thing I know it's how to spot the genuine article because that's what you've got to watch out for. Not the cops, you can always get around the cops. But the one thing you can never, ever get around is the genuine article, and you, kid, are the genuine article.

Jonas: You can't have it both ways.

Jonas: [Addressing the congregation as the choir sings] Oh, people, the Lord is speaking to me right now.
[to Jane via a wireless radio transmitter]
Jonas: It better be good.
Jane: Now just relax. Cherry hat, Section 4, Row F.
Jonas: [points to the elderly man] You sir, in the brown jacket, I feel a burden you're carrying.
Brown Jacket: Who-who, me?
Jonas: Yes, sir. Now stand up and tell me if I'm hearing the Lord right. You're having a problem with your neighbor, am I right?
Brown Jacket: I sure am.
Jonas: Building a fence. Gonna harm your kids, right?
Brown Jacket: Yes, sir.
Jonas: Well, the Lord tells me...
Jane: [on the bus watching the events on the TV monitors; impressed] Amazing!
Jonas: [continues] ... is to make 'im your friend. You talk to him, and serve him up your best fried chicken...
[to his wife with the cherry hat]
Jonas: because yours is the best in the county, ain't it ma'am?
Woman with Cherries Hat: [excited] You know it is!
Jonas: Whoa boy, I'd love to get me some of that! Now come on up and thank the Lord for his saving!