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Quotes for
Dylan McKay (Character)
from "Beverly Hills, 90210" (1990)

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"Beverly Hills, 90210: Ever Heard the One About the Exploding Father? (#10.20)" (2000)
Jack McKay: [Saying their final goodbyes] We're going to make this work.
Dylan McKay: It works, now it works.

Dylan McKay: If it something goes wrong it's my fault?
Christine Pettit: Could you live with that?

Dylan McKay: You better step back because I'm pissed!

Dylan McKay: But you didn't tell her about me? It's been a long time Jack, I forgot what your priorties are.

Dylan McKay: Hearing your own father denying you exsist is awkward.

Jack McKay: I want us to be together.
Dylan McKay: Your seven years too late.
Jack McKay: I know I made a thousand mistakes.

Kelly Taylor: What's next?
Dylan McKay: He's going to leave the witness protection program.
Kelly Taylor: Is that allowed?
Dylan McKay: Yeah.

Jack McKay: We'd never see each other again.
Dylan McKay: I hated you for a long time.
[Cries]
Dylan McKay: You don't know what it's like to hate your own father. It ruins everything. But I don't hate you anymore.
[Cries as he hugs him]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: One Wedding and a Funeral (#6.10)" (1995)
Brandon Walsh: Hey man, going somewhere?
Dylan McKay: Somewhere.
Brandon Walsh: Coming back?
Dylan McKay: Maybe someday, maybe not.
Brandon Walsh: I understand.
Dylan McKay: I know you do. Lock up the place for me will ya?
Brandon Walsh: Sure. I guess I'll see you around?
Dylan McKay: I guess.

[At Dylan's house]
Brandon Walsh: Bruno called and told me not to let you go to Marchette's, something is up.
Dylan McKay: Toni's on her way down there.
Brandon Walsh: Let's go man!
[they rush out his front door]

[about Toni's death]
Brandon Walsh: You and I both know those bullets were not meant for Toni.
Dylan McKay: Not a word to anybody Brandon!
Brandon Walsh: I don't understand you McKay; first your father and now your wife. Are you gonna let this guy get away with this?

[At the cemetery]
Dylan McKay: Get rid of everybody, I got some unfinished business.
Brandon Walsh: Okay man!

[At the cemetery, Tony Marchette gives Dylan his gun and pleads to shoot him]
Dylan McKay: Go on, everything I've got to live for has been taken from me.
[Dylan puts the gun down]
Tony Marchette: No, my father is gone and your daughter is gone, we're even now. The killing is done.
[Dylan walks away]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Ode to Joy (#10.27)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: [At David's bachelor party] It's time for a blast from the past.
[Puts in Brandon's videotaped message]

Dylan McKay: [to Muntz at David's bachelor party] Light a match!

Steve Sanders: It is entitled, "Ode to Silver." In fair Beverly Hills a boy did reign, Davy Silver was his name. From far and wide the girls did speak for they heard of Davy's bedroom deeds.
[Hands it off to Dylan]
Dylan McKay: Donna Martin, with the golden hair was the first into our David's lair. Virgins we the couple swore until a girl named Ariel blew David's door.
[Hands it to Noah]
Noah Hunter: Clare was next and then some fox named Malone. Sophie and David took it all the way home. Yeah alright.
[Hands it to Muntz]
Morton Muntz: Denise was fun and Carol too!
[looks at David for the last part and waves the paper at him]
Morton Muntz: Claudia couldn't get her green card and that made poor David weep.
[Hands it back to Steve]
Steve Sanders: Don't forget Katie, the sex addict she. Robyn who hated his radio personality. Marta the artist, wasn't she fun? And Gina Kincaid, Oh number one!
Dylan McKay: I'll second that!
[Noah laughs and smiles]
Steve Sanders: One stop was left. Her name was Camille. We thought it might last but come on guys, get real. There's only one dame, her name's Donna. She's fine, my God Silver, it's about time!
[Nat and Mel clap. He gives the copy to David]
David Silver: I'll burn that. Thank you.
Steve Sanders: It's okay I have an original that I framed and you can hang it up.
[David pretends to rip the poem]

Kelly Taylor: [Her toast] Try as he might, David was not Mr. Popularity in high school. I on the other hand defined cool.
Dylan McKay: [Muttering] Yeah!
Kelly Taylor: As you can imagine I was how do I say this; appalled, at the thought of him becoming my step brother but shock of shocks he turned out to be great. Over the years he has been caring and thoughtful and tonight he has given me something that I will forever be grateful for. He has managed to turn my best friend into my sister.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Lover's Leap (#6.5)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: [after Bruno catches him in Marchette's office] Sorry, I know I'm not supposed to be in here but I needed to see something.
Bruno: What's that?
Dylan McKay: [holds of a photo frame of Jack McKay with Tony Marchette] This is my father.
Bruno: I know. I know who you are, Mr. McKay.
Dylan McKay: Does Marchette?
Bruno: Of course.
Dylan McKay: Does Toni?
Bruno: I met your father. You're a lot like him.
Dylan McKay: I don't know how exactly to take that. Obviously, not everyone thought that much of my dad.
Bruno: He was always right by me. I think you should go back to the dinner party. And one more thing, Dylan. Antonia is like a daughter to me. Don't forget that.

Dylan McKay: He has a picture of him with his arm around Jack. He's sick!
Brandon Walsh: Toni doesn't know anything about this?
Dylan McKay: Nope.

Donna Martin: [Nat and Willie are chasing a mouse] Nat, Nat you're handling this all wrong.
Dylan McKay: Donna, you get a better method?
Donna Martin: As a matter of fact I do! Perhaps you guys better stand back. I think I saw him go behind the Jukebox.
[At the Jukebox]
Brandon Walsh: What are you going to do?
Donna Martin: Oh it is very scientific.
[Kneels down]
Donna Martin: Come here mousy.
[Mouse comes to her and goes in her hand]
Donna Martin: Is this the little mouse you guys are scared of?
Nat Bussichio: Get him out of here!
[All are amazed at her]

Dylan McKay: [At the Student Union] Does anybody else know what you know?
Brandon Walsh: No!
Dylan McKay: Good let's keep it that way!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Marathon Man (#9.10)" (1998)
Kelly Taylor: We're going to breakfast on a jet?
Dylan McKay: No. We're going to brunch.

Kelly Taylor: In case you haven't noticed we are at an airport.
Dylan McKay: You are observant!
[Smiles]

Kelly Taylor: Cabo? Cabo San Lucas Mexico?
Dylan McKay: That's correct Kelly, Bob tell her what's she's won!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Scared Very Straight (#4.20)" (1994)
[Dylan looks inside a duffle bag containing several bags of drugs and various pills]
Dylan McKay: Oh my... David, this is a lot of weight, man. We got to do something right now.
David Silver: I know. I was thinking we could take it down to the beach somewhere and bury it.
Dylan McKay: It that the best you can do? What if someone's watching your house?
David Silver: You think the cops are watching? Great, now what I'm I going to do?
Dylan McKay: It's simple. Take this stuff into the bathroom and flush it down the toilet.
David Silver: What are you kidding? I can't do that.
Dylan McKay: Why can't you do that?
David Silver: Because, man, that stuff's worth a lot of money. What if Andy gets out of jail later, and he shows up here looking for it?
Dylan McKay: Tell Andy to kiss your ass!
David Silver: I can't do that, he's my friend.
Dylan McKay: He's your friend? Let me tell you a little something about your friend, David. Last night when the cops were hauling him away, I'll bet that even before they got him downtown, they told him that his best play was to give up his supplier. His lawyer probably showed up an hour later, and tells him the same thing. First offense, a little cooperation, he can skate. But guess whose name comes up in the interrogation at around midnight? That's right. Andy no doubt has made you the scapegoat to save his own hide. This morning, a judge probably signed a search warrant for this place. I'm guessing that as of now, you've got a fifteen minute time window to save your butt. Now, are you going to stand here and argue you options with me, or are you going to get in there and flush that stuff down the toilet?
David Silver: Oh, man. How'd I get myself into this?
Dylan McKay: How'd you get into it? You get off on getting high, David. I mean, you don't want to get rid of this stuff, do you? That's why you're not flushing it out of your life right now. I mean, why let all this good blow go to waste, huh? You're on the ledge, Silver. Don't jump.
David Silver: All right, man. Go flush it.
Dylan McKay: No, I'm not going to flush it. You're going to flush it. It's your deal.

Dylan McKay: You're on the ledge Silver. Don't jump.

Dylan McKay: [to David] One of these days you'll be on that ledge before you jump give me a call.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: I'm Back Because (#9.8)" (1998)
Dylan McKay: Remember when he had his radio station here? He has one at the After Dark, it is kind of shutdown until proven innocent. You should stop by. He is a good guy.
Mrs. Yvonne Teasley: I don't want Denise to get badgered.
Dylan McKay: He isn't allowed to talk to her. I'm doing it for him.
[She calls Denise over]

Dylan McKay: [to Denise's parents] When parents aren't paying attention, she will do some crazy things to get noticed, eventually being with an older man.
[Looks at Denise]

Dylan McKay: [to Denise] You think you're ignored? When I was a teenager I was living in a hotel. I wanted my parents attention so I did little things; no good. I did bigger things, know what I'm saying?
Mr. O'Lare: [Angry] This is not Denise's fault!
Dylan McKay: [Looks at her parents] It's yours,
[to her mom]
Dylan McKay: and yours. I'm asking you to own up to it for my friend's sake, and Denise's.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Heartbreaker (#4.18)" (1994)
Brandon Walsh: [Brandon and Dylan giving Nat CPR after he collapses from a heart attack] One, two, three, four, five.
Dylan McKay: Come on man, They're gonna be here! Come on.

Dylan McKay: [Nat has just collapsed on the floor of the Peach Pit] No pulse!
Brandon Walsh: [Brandon opens Nat's shirt and starts CPR] Let's go, one, two, three, four, five.

Dylan McKay: Call 9-1-1!
Brandon Walsh: You got it bro!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Things That Go Bang in the Night (#5.8)" (1994)
Valerie Malone: Dylan, what are the bullets for?
Dylan McKay: They're for the gun.
Valerie Malone: What's the gun for?
Dylan McKay: It kind of goes with the bullets.

[Dylan, high on drugs, shoots his gun at a paper Halloween skeleton sitting in an armchair]
Dylan McKay: What are you laughing at?

Brandon Walsh: [trying to wake up Dylan sleeping on his living room couch] Dylan? Dylan, come on man. Come on Dylan. Hey, come on. Wake up! Hey, hey, hey, hey. Come on. Come on, let's walk around here a little bit huh?
Dylan McKay: I'm fine! What, you think I O.D.? I was alseep.
Brandon Walsh: Must be a heavy sleeper. It took me nearly two minutes to wake you up.
Dylan McKay: Just very tired.
Brandon Walsh: Big day shooting up the house?
Dylan McKay: What house? This isn't my house. Don't got a house. I got nothing. No house. No money. No friends or family. Hey, where's my gun?
Brandon Walsh: Look, Dylan... I know that Kevin and Suzanne ripped you off, but... I'm really sorry. The only thing I can say is you gotta get over it.
Dylan McKay: [sarcastic] Yeah, I'll get over it... first thing in the morning.
Brandon Walsh: All right fine, then don't get over it! But do something besides just getting wasted everyday. I mean, what are you saying, man? That there was never anything more than money...
Dylan McKay: [interupting] Don't... don't come over here after two months and start analizing me! What do you know? How do you get so wise and come over here? Man, you live at home. You live the most cuddled existence of anybody that I know, and yet you come in here and tell me that you have some idea of what I'm going through. Man, you have no idea to what I am going through!
Brandon Walsh: Don't try to turn this around. This isn't about me.
Dylan McKay: No, it's never about you, isn't it Brandon? It's about Brenda. Brenda's got guts, man. She had the guts and moved away to another continent just to get away from you and everyone else in this evil world we live in!
Brandon Walsh: Dylan, at this point in time, I'm just about the only friend you've got. You sure you want to do this? Push me away like you've done to everyone else?
Dylan McKay: Yeah! May the bridges I burn light the way!
Brandon Walsh: Okay...
Dylan McKay: Brandon! Don't take my gun. If you walk out of here with it, I'll call the cops on you myself!
Brandon Walsh: Go ahead. My licence plate number is 3E5503. Want me to write it down?
Dylan McKay: No... just go. Get out. Leave me alone. GET OUT!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Eddie Waitkus (#10.18)" (2000)
Steve Sanders: [In Dylan's hotel room] One of the passengers looked like your dad.
Dylan McKay: My dad's been dead for seven years.

Christine Pettit: [At the California FBI building] Hello Dylan.
Dylan McKay: He's alive. Isn't he?
Christine Pettit: [Obviously wanting to keep things private] Why don't you come in?

Dylan McKay: [Putting two and two together about the Witness Protection Program vs. his father's death] There was no body, no open casket, no dental records. Nothing.
[Christine keeps up the facade]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Penultimate (#10.26)" (2000)
Kelly Taylor: Why didn't you tell me about "Amy"?
Dylan McKay: It was none of my business.
Kelly Taylor: You lied for him. You lied to me.
Dylan McKay: Yeah. But if I told you...
Kelly Taylor: I would have broken off the engagement a lot sooner then I did.
Dylan McKay: And come to me? Probably. You've been with me because you were mad at him. I didn't want that.
Kelly Taylor: So you were just going to sit back and watch me marry Matt, knowing he cheated on me?
Dylan McKay: You were committed to him.
Kelly Taylor: See? This is why this will never work out between us.
Dylan McKay: Why?
Kelly Taylor: Because you had this life-altering piece of information and you kept it from me. I thought we were friends.
Dylan McKay: Yeah. But when you get some distance on this... you'll see I acted like one.

Dylan McKay: [On the beach digging the words "I love Donna"] In a couple of days this sorry ass is graduating.
David Silver: Congratulations. You going to invite anyone to check it out?

David Silver: I open myself up to you guys and look at what I get.
Steve Sanders: Riddicule.
Dylan McKay: Of course.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Take Back the Night (#4.11)" (1993)
Brenda Walsh: Dylan, do you want a piece of pie?
[Dylan looks at the pie and then looks at Sears, who is badgering Kelly. Dylan picks up the pie and smears it on John Sears' face]
Dylan McKay: Want some?
[enraged, Sears charges at Dylan, but other guys grab him. While he is pulled away, he yells threats, but Dylan is unimpressed]

Kelly Taylor: [laughing, after Dylan smears a pie on John Sears' face] You are crazy but thank you.
Dylan McKay: [kisses Kelly] My pleasure.

Dylan McKay: [about Kelly's speech and how Steve Sanders saved her from being raped two years ago] Did she really say that she wishes their were more people like Steve Sanders?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: She Came in Through the Bathroom Window (#3.26)" (1993)
[Dylan, Steve, and Ginger are dressed up in green skin suits for a TV commercial]
Dylan McKay: I started the day studying for the SAT's, and now look at me, Steve. I'm Kermit the Frog!
Steve Sanders: With a rash!

Brandon Walsh: Oh Ginger!
[Dylan pops up above him around the bathroom door]
Dylan McKay: Oh Tina!
[Steve pops his head in above Dylan]
Steve Sanders: Oh Adrienne!
Brandon Walsh, Dylan McKay, Steve Sanders: [Look at each other and enter the men's bathroom] Oh Marla!

Dylan McKay, Brandon Walsh: [Car engine roars and Dylan and Brandon look at Steve] Where are your keys?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Dead End (#3.21)" (1993)
Christine Pettit: Jack, don't be so morbid!
Dylan McKay: He can't help it, it's his nature.

Dylan McKay: Now how did you swing that?
[Looking at the big yacht in the marina]
Jack McKay: I got friends in real low places.
Dylan McKay: I'm driving!

Dylan McKay: [to Christine] You wanna slap him; you're closer!
[She hits Jack playfully]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Under the Influence (#5.2)" (1994)
[Brandon sees Dylan drinking]
Dylan McKay: You want a beer?
Brandon Walsh: No thanks.
Dylan McKay: Then will you quit looking at mine?

Nat Bussichio: Dylan, what's going on with you?
Dylan McKay: [lying] Nothing.
Nat Bussichio: Come on. You've been grumpy and moping around since you got back from Mexico. There's something. You were completely rude and belligerent to Jim and Cindy in there. All you've been doing is giving me and everyone that comes in a hard time this past week.
Dylan McKay: I don't want to talk about it!
Nat Bussichio: You know what I think? I think all that millions that you're making has finally gone to your head! That chemical cleanup company that your co-owning with Kevin and Suzanne in Arizona, New Mexico or wherever has finally gotten to you!
Dylan McKay: Nat, you have no idea what you're talking about. You have no idea how so far off the track you are.
Nat Bussichio: Then what is it? Don't shut me out!
Dylan McKay: Nat, I'm just... what happened is...
[there is a short pause as Dylan considers telling Nat about Kevin and Suzanne stealing all of his money, but after a few seconds of silence, he decides not to]
Dylan McKay: I'm having a bad time right now.
Nat Bussichio: What is it? Is it about Kelly?
Dylan McKay: [cynical tone] I don't know. Maybe!
Nat Bussichio: [shouting as Dylan walks away to his car to drive away] Well, what do you expect, Dylan? You dissappear on us all summer! You don't call! You don't write! You can't blame her for going out with Brandon!
Dylan McKay: [turns back to Nat as his face lights up] What did you say?
Nat Bussichio: [slumps back; whispering to himself] Oh, no...

Dylan McKay: [Confronts Kelly and Brandon at the party] This is like a bad movie, my best friend and my girl.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Tainted Love (#10.13)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: I just don't like silver.

Dylan: Anybody need a godfather?

Dylan McKay: Steve I thought about it and I'm here for you. I will be a godfather to your daughter.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Green Room (#1.1)" (1990)
Dylan McKay: Mad, bad and dangerous to know. That was him and that's me.

[Scott is working on the computer. Brandon walks into the room]
Brandon Walsh: What is it?
Scott Scanlon: Floorplan.
Brandon Walsh: What for?
Scott Scanlon: The perfect dance club.
Brandon Walsh: I see you've done your homework, man.
Scott Scanlon: Looks are deceiving. I've never set foot inside a club. Every time I try, I get carded.
Brandon Walsh: So how'd you design it?
Scott Scanlon: I used my imagination instead of my experience.
Jock #1: Oh, how sweet. How touching. A little dork with big dreams.
Jock #2: But no experience.
Scott Scanlon: At least I'm not the missing link.
Jock #2: What did you say?
[lifts Scott out of his chair]
Brandon Walsh: Hey, hey, hey! Take it easy, guy!
Jock #1: Where is that erase command anyway, huh?
Dylan McKay: Touch that board, my friend!... Please. Touch it.
[Jocks let go of Scott]
Dylan McKay: You know, the tragedy of this country is that creeps like you two end up running it.
Jock #1: Yeah, and losers like you end up...
Dylan McKay: Let me tell you something, just so you know in advance. I'm not in a good mood today. In fact, I'm feeling a little hostile.
Jock #1: [sarcastically] Whoa.
[Jocks leave the room]
Dylan McKay: [looks at computer screen] You're doing a good job, kid. Keep up the good work!
[exits]
Brandon Walsh: Your friend's pretty cool.
Scott Scanlon: I've never seen the guy in my life!

Dylan McKay: I just don't believe in winning through intimidation. Unless of course, I'm doing the intimidating.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Hazardous to Your Health (#5.18)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: [spying on Kevin and Suzanne] Yep, that's them. That's Kevin and Suzanne.
J. Jay Jones: No, no. Now they call themselves Karl and Kitty Cavendish. Cute huh? Erica is still Erica as far as I can tell. I mean, she doesn't have an alias.
Dylan McKay: So, what are they doing down here?
J. Jay Jones: Business opportunities. They arrived a few weeks ago from Santos, Brazil, man. They had an import company down there, but you can bet that it was a cover for smuggling.
Dylan McKay: Drugs?
J. Jay Jones: Why not? The way I figure, it either got too dry or too hot for them, and they just went looking for greener pastures.
Dylan McKay: Speaking of green, where's my cash?
J. Jay Jones: There's 50 grand in a local bank, but the big bucks are stashed in another bank with a secret account number somewhere. That's what we're gonna flush out.
Dylan McKay: How do you know all that?
J. Jay Jones: How do I know all that? Right now, I got a nice, jucy wire tap on their phone line, okay? I can tell you all sorts of stuff. This guy, "Karl", he thinks he's Captain Kidd, and he's into... blowing his big bucks on pirate collectibles. "Kitty" on the other hand, she's just happy she's not sleeping with Karl. Is that enough?

Dylan McKay: All right, you guys have had your fun. What do you say we make a deal?
Suzanne Steele: A deal? I don't think you have any money make a deal.
Dylan McKay: And I don't think you want to spend the rest of your life running from the law, do you?
Kevin Weaver: [sarcastic] Yo, ho, hee. A pirate's life for me.

Dylan McKay: [to Erica in Mexico] I missed you too kid, I can't believe how much you've grown.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Little Monsters (#5.19)" (1995)
Cindy Walsh: Dylan, we don't mean to pry, but we know you have spent some time with Valerie. In your opinion, is there any reason we should be concerned about her?
Dylan McKay: Let me just say this: if you guys thought you had your hands full with Brenda, this girl Valerie is a much bigger package, with a much brighter bow.

Dylan McKay: [writes a check] This'll buy you the warmest winter coat you've ever seen?
Valerie Malone: What's this? $10,000? Is this the first installment?
Dylan McKay: That's a lot of money.
Valerie Malone: Well, compared to the millions that you came away with, it isn't?
Dylan McKay: What do you expect?
Valerie Malone: Well, have you ever heard of maybe, "equal pay for equal work"?
Dylan McKay: I've heard of another word: greed.
Valerie Malone: Obviously, something you know about.

Dylan McKay: [to Jim after expressing his concerns over the recent trip to Mexico] You're little house guest is $10,000.00 richer.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Girl from New York City (#4.2)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: Don't sweat it, you'll be starting school in a few weeks and I hear rumors... there are girls.
Celeste Lundy: Don't tell Steve that!
Steve Sanders: You have nothing to worry about.
[cuddles her]
Dylan McKay: He's a liar!
Brandon Walsh: He's lying!
Dylan McKay: He's lying!
Brandon Walsh: I already said that!

Dylan McKay: Some things never change; you do more talking than cooking!

Dylan McKay: When do you go back to Yale?
Andrea Zuckerman: Boy, you really are out of the loop!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Halloween (#2.13)" (1991)
Dylan McKay: It doesn't matter how much of a magnet a girl turns on. A guy always has a choice of not making her do something she doesn't want to do.

Dylan McKay: This is a stick up, give me all of your candy!
[Brandon hands him the basket of raisins]
Dylan McKay: Ew, raisins!

Dylan McKay: Drift small guy!
Brandon Walsh: Drop dead Ape!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Intervention (#5.9)" (1994)
Brandon Walsh: Look, Dylan, you might have given up on yourself, but I'm here for a very selfish reason. You saved my life once. Three years ago we went on a camping trip, we were up on a mountain the morning after a rainstorm, I slipped on some rocks and you saved me from falling off the cliff. Do you remember?
Dylan McKay: Yeah, I remember. So what?
Brandon Walsh: So, when I see you getting all boozed up and all geezed out on coke or whatever you're killing yourself with, I can't help thinking... what's gonna happen next time if you're not there?
Dylan McKay: You fall off the mountain. I'm not in the saviory business anymore, Brandon.
David Silver: Well, I can't agree with you on that one, Dylan. Did you forget about the little incident that happened in the beach apartment a few months ago? I called on you for help. I was wasted on meth, the cops were banging on the door... you saved me from going to jail.
Andrea Zuckerman: Look, David buried his friend Scott in high school. Brandon just buried his friend Josh a short while ago. We don't want to bury you, Dylan.
Dylan McKay: So put your shovels away, 'cause nobody's dying here, all right? I'm fine.
Brandon Walsh: You're not fine.
Dylan McKay: I'm fine!
Brandon Walsh: Stop lying to us, and stop lying to yourself. People who play with guns and get high are not fine!

Dope Dealer: Hey
Dylan McKay: Hey man
Dope Dealer: How you doing?
Dylan McKay: Always end in a pitch
Dope Dealer: I always will... like an old street lamp turn it on everynite at 6
Dylan McKay: So a ittle 9-ball cover the freight there?
Dope Dealer: No man sorry. I don't gamble except with my life. You know I got a little something special tonight I don't know if you'll be intrested in
Dylan McKay: What do you got?
Dope Dealer: Ever chase the Dragon?
Dylan McKay: Heroin?
Dope Dealer: Yeah, yeah smoke a little bit makes comin in from a snowstorm alot easier to deal
Dylan McKay: How much?
Dope Dealer: Well um here, there's a little sample on me trade a game of pool


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Labors of Love (#4.19)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: [At the hospital telling Brandon the good news] I bought out Joey. Nat and I are partners.

Dylan McKay: I just did it because Nat's a friend of mine. And I wanted to keep something going that we all thought was important.
Brandon Walsh: What are you doing taking lessons from me?
Dylan McKay: Who me? Are you kidding? You hang around a Boy Scout long enough, you're gonna learn the handshake.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Buffalo Gals (#6.2)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: [Looks at stuff on Tony Marchette and sees the engagement ring] You getting engaged?
Brandon Walsh: Yeah, wanna be my best man?
Dylan McKay: Thought you'd never ask.
[Gives him a look]
Dylan McKay: Take it back!
Brandon Walsh: Yeah, I have been busy this summer.
Dylan McKay: So has Kelly from what I hear.
Brandon Walsh: I know I met the loser coming out of her bedroom this morning.
[Dylan looks at him and Brandon gives him a fake smile]
Brandon Walsh: So much for "I choose me!"
Dylan McKay: Going to the party?
Brandon Walsh: Of course; I'm a glutton for punishment!
Dylan McKay: Yeah so am I.
[pause]
Dylan McKay: Loser huh?
Brandon Walsh: [Gives him a look] Loser!

Donna Martin: [Donna is drunk on Champagne again] Can someone pass me the champagne?
Dylan McKay: Donna, don't you think you should slow down? This is your third glass.
Donna Martin: [Looks at Dylan] Are you saying you won't give pass it to me? That's fine; I'll get it myself.
[She reaches for the bottle]
Brandon Walsh: [Brandon grabs the bottle from her hand] Whoa! Hey, you're cut off!
Dylan McKay: [Talking to Brandon like a dog] Give it to me Brandon!
Kelly Taylor: No, no. It's ok; I'll drive her home!
[Brandon reluctantly gives the bottle back]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Let's Eat Cake (#10.2)" (1999)
Steve Sanders: [after Janet leaves and all four were looking at her boobs] Well she had a boob job.
Noah Hunter: You tell us, you're the one sleeping with her.
Steve Sanders: Not lately.
Dylan McKay: That is why you're not happy about this Steve.
Steve Sanders: Why wouldn't she tell me she was going to have it done?
Matt Durning: I heard that they feel different.
Noah Hunter: [to Matt] You never had them?

Gina Kincaid: What was that?
Dylan McKay: That was a drug bust.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Final Proof (#10.16)" (2000)
Steve Sanders: Your going to need help.
Dylan McKay: You got a wife and a kid.

Noah Hunter: [after the cigarette and the gas meet and everyone jumps away from the flames] What about the money?
Dylan McKay: Forget about it.
[Noah goes in the smoky car and grabs the money]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Midlife... Now What? (#3.18)" (1993)
Nat Bussichio: So who are you on the outs with? Brenda or Kelly?
Dylan McKay: Brenda and Kelly.

Dylan McKay: Silver, what's up?
David Silver: I've been up all night. Little Erin misses her mama.
Dylan McKay: What about her dada?
David Silver: He was working. Mel's theory is work the long hours make the big bucks and spoil the women in your life. Why do you think he and Kelly get along so well.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Easter Bunny (#10.22)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: Hey, Matt. Kelly came to see me last night.
Matt Durning: She did? What happened?
Dylan McKay: She was asking a lot of questions about the trip.
Matt Durning: Well, what did you tell her?
Dylan McKay: Nothing.
Matt Durning: Well, what'd she ask? Be specific.
Dylan McKay: She sensed that something's wrong with you, so she's concerned.
Matt Durning: And you told her nothing happened.
Dylan McKay: That's right. I lied.
Matt Durning: Oy, I got to tell her.
Dylan McKay: You sure do.
Matt Durning: What are you talking about? You're the one who told me *not* to tell her.
Dylan McKay: Yeah, that's before I knew you'd walk around looking like a war criminal.
Matt Durning: Yeah, well, I feel guilty, all right? I can't help that.
Dylan McKay: Feeling guilty is one thing. Looking guilty is something entirely different. Now, if Kelly sees you sweating, then she's going to figure it out. That's the only thing worse than you telling her. Don't let that happen.

Matt Durning: When Kelly and I break up will there be a grace period or are you going to offer the Caribbean vacation right away?
Dylan McKay: I don't want that to happen.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Spring Fever (#10.21)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: Do you feel all right?
Matt Durning: Yeah, I feel fine.
Dylan McKay: We can be in L.A. in a few hours...

Dylan McKay: We're in love with the same woman.
Amy: Cozy.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Must Be a Guy Thing (#6.3)" (1995)
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: [after arriving at the Peach Pit After Dark and seeing some of the gang] You know everyone in this place!
Dylan McKay: Yeah, I do!

Dylan McKay: [At the Peach Pit after Clare announces to Steve she will tutor him in Math] That comes out to about 20 bucks an hour for you mathematically challenged, sporto!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Child Is Father to the Man (#3.22)" (1993)
Mel Borman: Hello, Dylan. My name is Mel Borman and I'm with the FBI.
Dylan McKay: Well, why are we meeting here?
Mel Borman: We're not. In fact, this meeting never took place. You will not tell anyone about this and we will deny that this conversation ever happened.
Dylan McKay: Look, you're wasting your time. My father never talked about his business or any of the people he did business with, so I cannot help you.
Christine Pettit: [enters] We know that, Dylan. We only want to let you in on the truth about your father.
Dylan McKay: Oh, they drag you down here too, Christine?
Christine Pettit: Not exactly. I... work with these guys.
Dylan McKay: I don't understand. I don't understand any of this.
Mel Borman: When your father agreed to cooperate with us, he had only one condition. That is if anything was to happen to him, we were to let you know that he was working with the good guys. He wanted to protect you from what he was really doing.
Dylan McKay: I get it now. That explains everything. His early parole. His nervous behavior. His reason for dissolving my trust fund. He was working undercover with you. He was going to lure some big-shot mobster to the boat, and you guys were going to arrest him in a sing operation. Is that correct?
Mel Borman: That was the plan, yes.
Dylan McKay: Well, my only question is that while you geniuses were supposed to be watching my father's every move, HOW THE HELL DID THEY GET A BOMB UNDER HIS CAR?
Mel Borman: [sheepishly] Uh... we're still looking in on that. We think there may have been a leak somewhere. Info may have gotten through to our target, or maybe to another third or fourth party. There's still too much we didn't know about your father's business. He had business ties to many business people with ties to organized crime.
Dylan McKay: You overlooked the fact that they could get to him first? Oh, come on! This is sick! You government guys make me sick! You got my father out of prison early. We went undercover for you people. Yet you were so busy covering your asses that you let your star witness fall through the cracks of your flawed case and it cost him his life!
Mel Borman: [angry] All right, that's enough! Look... it was a major screw-up, okay? But you have to understand that this is an ongoing investigation. A lot of peoples lives out there are on the line, not just your father's. He knew what he was getting into. He knew very well that he may never get out of this thing alive. That's why he never told you anything. Now, the only reason why you're getting this information from us now, which you aren't, is because your father cut a deal. This meeting is over Dylan.

Dylan McKay: [Dylan's inner self] Just tell her that Jack McKay got blown to bits in Venice, California and Dylan thought she might want to know.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Home Is Where the Tart Is (#6.1)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: Have you seen Kelly?
Valerie Malone: [Pulls away disgusted] You never learn do you?
[Walks away]
Arnold Morton Muntz: [Puts his arm around Dylan] Learn what?

Dylan McKay: [about aiding Dylan in the search for his father's killer] I tried she didn't want to play. I'd rather drag you in anyway.
Brandon Walsh: Sure, why should I let you have all the fun.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Game Is Chicken (#3.17)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: That guy has been in detention since he was a Freshman, man that guy gets his mail sent there!

Dylan McKay: [Gets out of the car after he parks in front of Steve's and Frank's car] What are you doin?
Frank Padilla: Who is that? Is that McKay. Why is it over because the prince of Bel-Aire says its over?
Dylan McKay: [Looks at Frank] Yeah because I said so.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The End of the World as We Know It (#9.23)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [to Noah] He's just doing his job.

Dylan McKay: All I know is that I go to put a movie in the VCR and there it is; Kelly and Matt going at it!
[Angry looks on both faces]
Kelly Taylor: Who saw it?
Dylan McKay: Just me and Gina. I told her not to tell anybody.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Rebel with a Cause (#3.13)" (1992)
[Brenda and Rick run into Dylan and Kelly at a restaurant]
Brenda Walsh: Oh my God!
Kelly Taylor: Brenda.
Brenda Walsh: I can't believe this. I can't believe you would do this to me.
Kelly Taylor: Hey, you said Dylan could go out with whoever he wanted.
Brenda Walsh: And you said you were my best friend. What a joke.
Dylan McKay: Hey, give it a rest Bren, alright?
Brenda Walsh: You know, if you're trying to make me jealous Dylan, it won't work.
Dylan McKay: Hey! You broke up with me, alright? And don't you ever forget it!
Brenda Walsh: So, how long has this been going on?
Dylan McKay: Since about six thirty.
Brenda Walsh: [to Kelly] You know, Kelly if you're trying to loose your bimbo image, I honestly don't think this will help.

Brenda Walsh: [Dylan storms by] Dylan where are you going?
Dylan McKay: [walking down the hall annoyed] Anywhere but here!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Otherwise Engaged (#4.9)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: Let's just say that Stuart Carson is no choir boy!

Dylan McKay: Wait a minute Jim, you aren't trying to talk me into doing what I think you are trying to talk me into... I don't want to get involved!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Windstruck (#4.14)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: The happy wanderer returns! So how was Emily Valentine?
Brandon Walsh: She's good.

Dylan McKay: Thanksgiving Day, we had a scene in your living room. It bordered on ugly!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Who's Zoomin' Who? (#5.7)" (1994)
Valerie Malone: Are you alone? 'Cause if you're not, I'll go.
Dylan McKay: What if I am? Will you still go?
Valerie Malone: Look, I just want to talk to you.
Dylan McKay: I think you've done enough talkin' lately.
Valerie Malone: I don't know what you mean.
Dylan McKay: I mean, I got a visit today from Jim Walsh I could live without. He showed up at the Peach Pit claiming to know all about my financial situation.
Valerie Malone: Could I help it if he got a fax about you and started nosing around?
Dylan McKay: You don't have to give me crap about a fax. I know you told him that I'm broke, after you promised me that you wouldn't tell anyone. You don't lie very well. I hate a liar.
Valerie Malone: Well, you've been lying to me and everyone else for months! Pretending you're still Richie-Rich! Why were you trying to hide it anyway? It was only a matter of time...
Dylan McKay: [interrupting] So what? You think you did me a favor by expediting the inevitable? No, I don't think so. I think you're mad because you caught me with a girl the other night.
Valerie Malone: All right, yes, I told him! You don't know how intimidating Jim Walsh can be!
Dylan McKay: Oh, I know exactly how intimidating Jim Walsh can be! What'd he do? Bully you?
Valerie Malone: What am I supposed to do? I'm living in his house!
Dylan McKay: Hey! Stand up to him! I mean, Bren did. In fact, she actually got good at it there in the ol' end. You know, standin' up to big Jim.
Valerie Malone: You know, the Walshes are really concerned about you!
Dylan McKay: Well if they cared so much, tell me this, why wasn't I good enough for their daughter? At least Brenda had the guts to call them on it.
Valerie Malone: Look, I am not Brenda! I will never be Brenda! Don't talk to me about Brenda!
Dylan McKay: No, you're not Brenda! You're just pretending to be! I think you like it! I think you like living in Brenda's house, you like sleeping in Brenda's bed. You got Brenda's brother and Brenda's parents all there in that nice cozy little package! Instant family!
Valerie Malone: What's wrong with that?
Dylan McKay: [after a pause; suttle tone] Nothing.

Jim Walsh: I've been made aware of your monetary situation.
Dylan McKay: [feigning ignorance] What situation?
Jim Walsh: Come on, Dylan. No more games or lies. I just want to talk.
Dylan McKay: Yeah, well... I don't want to talk to you and I especially don't want to talk about my "monetary situation". You fired me as your client, remember? You're not my financial adviser anymore. You aren't anything.
Jim Walsh: Come on, don't be this way. I want to help.
Dylan McKay: I don't want your help! I want you to leave me alone!
Nat Bussichio: Dylan! Jim told me that you're broke. Suzanne and Kevin really did swindle you out of everything.
Jim Walsh: [to Dylan] When you applied for that line of credit the other day on your mortgage, the bank contacted me and I did a little investigating. I'm sorry. Dylan... I am so sorry. I-I had no idea. I've been racking my brain all morning trying to come up with a solution for you.
Dylan McKay: Well, you can rest your brain 'cause there is no solution. My money's all gone. You and I can't do anything about it now. It's done. It's over.
Jim Walsh: You don't have any leads as to where Kevin and Suzanne might be hiding?
Dylan McKay: No, I do not have any leads to where Kevin and Suzanne are hiding. For all I know, they skipped off this planet with every cent of my money. They played me for a fool. They set this whole thing up perfectly. You happy now?
Jim Walsh: Dylan, this doesn't make me happy.
Dylan McKay: Oh, I think it does. I think you can't wait to tell me "I told you so" about Kevin and Suzanne and their business venture. I'll bet you can't wait to tell me that I got everything that I deserved, everything that was coming to me. You can't wait to tell me that you were right and I was wrong about Kevin and Suzanne. That your original suspicions about Suzanne were correct. So, why don't you skip everything else and just say it... and get out of my face! I don't want to talk about how I was played like a violin by two natural-born con artists who I trusted like my own family! I didn't want to talk then, and I don't want to talk about it now!
Jim Walsh: [walks out; angry and sarcastic] I'm so glad I cancelled a trip with my wife for this!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Things to Do on a Rainy Day (#2.26)" (1992)
Brandon Walsh: [doorbell rings] What do I do?
Dylan McKay: Answer the door!
Brandon Walsh: Right. What do I say?
Dylan McKay: I hear hello is really popular!

Dylan McKay: Steve, What's the big deal, it's an ad for a naked lady, you haven't seen one before?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Mr. Walsh Goes to Washington (#4.31)" (1994)
Jim Walsh: Dylan, come in. Got some good news?
Dylan McKay: Not exactly, no.
Jim Walsh: What's the matter?
Dylan McKay: Well, Kevin and I have been discussing the situation and I sort of made up my mind... well, we made up our minds that we'd like to fund the project ourselves.
Jim Walsh: What do you mean "ourselves"?
Dylan McKay: I mean Kevin and I.
Jim Walsh: You mean Kevin's brains and your money?
Dylan McKay: Listen, Jim, we appreciate everything you've done for us and we think it's really a hell of a deal. It's just not what we're looking for right now.
Jim Walsh: Wait a minute. You come into my house on a Sunday with a hair-brained scheme like this? Where the hell is Kevin? What are you, the millionaire messenger boy?
Dylan McKay: Okay, I knew you'd be a little angry.
Jim Walsh: Angry? This is a professional embarrassment! Yeah, I'm angry. Listen... Dylan, you may not belive this, you may not even understand this right now, but you have no idea how this game is played.
Dylan McKay: What is to understand? I mean, your own firm told me what a great investment this is. I've seen the figures. I'm not stupid.
Jim Walsh: Yeah, but those figures have contingencies built into them. Big contingencies. You don't have that kind of capital. You don't have letters of credit. You don't have relationships with banks. What are you thinking about?
Dylan McKay: I just wish you woundn't take this so personally.
Jim Walsh: Well, how else am I supposed to take it? You sat in that room yesterday in good faith! If something goes wrong, you could lose a lot of money!
Dylan McKay: I'm looking out for my family! Kevin and Suzanne are my family now! There are no guarantees, you know that. That's my money in there! If you can't...
Jim Walsh: Hold it right there. Every time I give you advice you don't like, you threaten to fire me, but not this time. This time, I'm firing you. As of 9:00 a.m. tomorrow morning, you can walk into any bank and do whatever you damn well please with your money, because you are no longer my client! You're on your own!
Dylan McKay: Well, it's about time!

[last lines]
Brenda Walsh: The only time I ever felt that proud was when I was on stage. And it wasn't just my parents, you know, it was like a whole audience applauding me. I want it, Dylan. That's why I'm going to London.
Dylan McKay: I understand.
Brenda Walsh: I knew you would. You always understand me. You belive in me, don't you?
Dylan McKay: Yeah. I do.
Brenda Walsh: Dylan, I love you. I've never stopped loving you. And I know now I never will.
Dylan McKay: I'll applaud you from afar.
Brenda Walsh: I want more then your applause. I won't be gone forever, Dylan. Give me something to come back to.
[they kiss]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: P.S. I Love You: Part 2 (#5.32)" (1995)
Christine Pettit: [voice on Dylan's answering machine] Dylan, It's Christine again. I just got back to my office in the Bureau and please don't contact me again or do anything until you talk to me in person. Tom Rose and those men in Palm Springs that you asked me about are very dangerous. We're very close to arresting the man who killed your father, and this is not the time to get involved. Don't do anything, okay?
[the message ends, as Dylan is loading bullets into his gun]
Dylan McKay: No, Christine. Not okay!

Brandon Walsh: [On a bus together back to LA] How did we end up like this?
Dylan McKay: I have no idea Bran!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: The Kindness of Strangers (#3.15)" (1992)
Dylan McKay: [after Christine tells Jack and Dylan where the food came from] You mean Nat?
Christine Pettit: You know Nat?
Dylan McKay: Yeah, I do.
Christine Pettit: Any friend of Nat's is a friend of mine.
[Smiles at Dylan]

Dylan McKay: What are you going to do Jack... walk away; it's what you do best!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: I'm Happy for You... Really (#10.25)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: [On the phone with Dylan] Kel, it's Dylan.
Kelly Taylor: I thought I lost you. I've been calling you all day.

Dylan McKay: [after telling her he rode the train up north] I know its stupid and dangerous. You can start bitching anytime.
Kelly Taylor: Thank God you're ok.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Slipping Away (#9.17)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [At David's and Dylan's house] Let me get this straight you want to help Lauren?
Kelly Taylor: Is that so hard to believe?

Dylan McKay: [at the Beach House and in front of Kelly] I was just coming to see you.
Gina Kincaid: [angry about his lack of affection and he and Kelly constantly together] Sorry to disappoint you.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Commencement: Part 1 (#3.29)" (1993)
[Dylan answers his front door to find his weirdo mother Iris there]
Iris McKay: Hi!
Dylan McKay: [sighs] What a pleasant surprise.
Iris McKay: Did you really think I'd miss your graduation?
Dylan McKay: Why not? You missed literally everything else in my life.
Iris McKay: Oh, you're in a snarly mood. Aren't you the least bit tickled to see me?
Dylan McKay: I'm stunned actually. Can't you pick up the phone like a normal person and call to let me know that you're coming?
Iris McKay: Because I was afraid you'd tell me to stay home, and I was hoping we could spend a few days together. Besides, half the fun is catching you with a girl in the bedroom. Did I? Did I catch you with a girl in the bedroom?
Dylan McKay: No, no, you didn't. We were on the couch. Kelly!
Iris McKay: You're still with Kelly?

Dylan McKay: You barge in here unannounced and expect me to welcome you with open arms when the fact of the matter is when I needed you two months ago, you were unreachable.
Iris McKay: I was on a trek in the Andes trying to find my meaning in this existence.
Dylan McKay: Yeah, well while you were away on one of your many spiritual quests to the Andes, the Himalayas, the South Pacific or wherever trying to find the meaning of life, I was just at my father's funeral.
Iris McKay: And I called you as soon as a heard.
Dylan McKay: Right. What'd you expect? It was a bad timing, you and I, huh?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: And Don't Forget to Give Me Back My Black T-Shirt (#10.23)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: I'm sure young David would agree.

Dylan McKay: [to Kelly and Matt] Amy wasn't exactly girlfriend material.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: You Better Work (#10.3)" (1999)
Janet Sosna: [about her baby's heartbeat] It was so strong, like a little hummingbird.
Donna Martin: Oh, that must have been incredible.
Janet Sosna: Just talking about it makes me want to cry.
Kelly Taylor: How is Steve?
Donna Martin: Did he freak out?
Janet Sosna: He was so excited, he could barely speak. He's going to be a great father.
[cut to the Walsh house]
Steve Sanders: I'm going to be a horrible father!
Matt Durning: Steve, you've got to relax.
Steve Sanders: Relax? Look who you're talking to! I'm Steve Sanders. I'm the original party animal. I'm an irresponsible goofball. I'm...
Dylan McKay: Well, you've had your moments. I'll give you that, Steve.
Steve Sanders: [sarcastically] Thank you very much. Ladies and gentlemen, my good friend Dylan McKay.

Dylan McKay: Hey. You know who called me today? That idiot Lecksis from the admissions office. He says I got in.
David Silver: Hm.
Dylan McKay: He also said some pesky kid kept stopping by on my behalf.
David Silver: Yeah? Well, don't get too misty.
Dylan McKay: If that's the way you want it.
David Silver: "I slide by because I can."
Dylan McKay: Where'd you get my essay?
David Silver: Made myself a copy; it makes a great bookmark. "I blow through people, I cheat myself, and the only outcome after four years is sitting here thinking up lies that'll persuade you to let me in. I can't, so here's the truth. College won't fix what's wrong, but it'll get me closer. I'm out of options, I'm open to anything, and I'm ready to contribute." Why don't you show us all you weren't lying?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Love Is Blind (#10.24)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: What is that?
Steve Sanders: Oh, it's a beer hat. You know, when you're watching the game and you don't want to run back to the kitchen for a refill.
Dylan McKay: Why are you wearing it?
Steve Sanders: I was feeding Maddy.
Dylan McKay: Ale or lager?
Steve Sanders: Very funny, Dylan. But meanwhile, she gets her milk and I get to keep my hands free. I'm actually thinking of applying for a patent.

Kelly Taylor: [about the date for Kelly and Matt's wedding] I want you to be there.
Matt Durning: We both do.
Dylan McKay: I'll see what I can do.
[Drives off]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Back in the High Life Again (#3.19)" (1993)
[last lines]
[Kelly and Dylan watch an angry Brenda walk off]
Dylan McKay: Let her go. She'll be all right.
Kelly Taylor: I hope so. Will we?

Kelly Taylor: Brenda, try to understand how you mean to us, all right?
Dylan McKay: I know this is hard for you, Bren. It's hard for all of us.
Brenda Walsh: [suddenly angry] Look, you made your choice Dylan, and I have to live with that, and I should have seen it coming. But I don't have to stand and listen to it anymore! I'm going home, okay?
Kelly Taylor: No, Brenda. We need to tell you something else.
Brenda Walsh: I don't want to hear it! I've heard enough!
Dylan McKay: Well, you're gonna have to, Bren, 'cause neither one of us can stand to lie to you anymore.
Kelly Taylor: This summer, while you were in Paris...
Dylan McKay: Look, I told you I was with a girl, right? Kelly was the girl.
Brenda Walsh: I though you guys were my friends. I loved you, I trusted you both!
Kelly Taylor: Brenda, please...
Dylan McKay: We didn't plan this, Brenda.
Brenda Walsh: No, of course you didn't plan it, Dylan! You just let it happen! And you lied to me, both of you, for months and months! You know, when I broke up with you, you made it seem like Kelly was just some girl you picked to go out with. You made it seem so innocent like it was my fault!
Kelly Taylor: Neither of us wanted to hurt you.
Brenda Walsh: Well, you just did! You didn't seem to care about how I felt, Kelly!
Dylan McKay: That's not true.
Brenda Walsh: Did you two sleep together while I was in Paris?
Kelly Taylor: [firmly] No!
Brenda Walsh: Why should I believe you?
Dylan McKay: Because it's the truth!
Brenda Walsh: Why are you doing this to me?
Dylan McKay: Because, we owe it to you, Bren. I mean, don't you think we all owe ourselves a little something more than this? I mean, we could start again from someplace a little more honest.
Brenda Walsh: Honesty? Is that was you think this is about, Dylan? Well's it's not! I don't think so. Look, I hate both of you! Never talk to me again!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Local Hero (#9.22)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [to the thief in the trunk of the car] It's not my problem! Shut up!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: A Pig Is a Boy Is a Dog (#4.23)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: [In the Walsh's driveway] I lent you my girlfriend and you made a move on her!
Steve Sanders: You made a move on Kelly?
Brandon Walsh: Nothing happened.
Dylan McKay: Then you send your little sex freak over looking for a hand out!
Brandon Walsh: Temporary moment of insanity. I wasn't thinking with my head!
Dylan McKay: You weren't thinking at all!
Steve Sanders: Hold on a second, can we back up to the part of the sex freak?
Dylan McKay: You obviously have some kind of problem with me. You wanna hit me; now here's your chance. Come on!
Brandon Walsh: I don't wanna hit you but if you feel like you wanna hit me go ahead!
[Dylan takes a swing and Brandon ducks; Steve gits hit in the nose and falls over]
Steve Sanders: Ouch! Do you know how much a nose costs? I still have two good eyes maybe you each want to gauge those out!
[Shoves Dylan and Brandon off of him]
Brandon Walsh: This is my fault guys!
Dylan McKay: Nothing is your fault until I say it is. It's your fault. I was looking forward to giving you a beating but now I see the beating is going to come from Lucinda!
Brandon Walsh: I know. Look at us she has got us at each other's throats; she has got be loving this.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Injustice for All (#5.14)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: [after opening the letter from someone in Michigan] Dear Mr. McKay, I found this note in my carryon after a recent trip to LA Airport.
[Reads the note about Brazil left behind from Erica]
Dylan McKay: It's from Erica!
[Cindy and Nat get a look of concern on their faces]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Divas (#4.27)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: [about Clare] Just say Whoa!
Brandon Walsh: Thought I did!
Dylan McKay: I don't think she heard you!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Acting Out (#4.28)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: Take it from a friend bro, just say whoa.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Survival Skills (#9.16)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [to Kelly after telling her what he learned from Matt] Whatever demons the woman has they're going to come back.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Vital Signs (#4.30)" (1994)
Kelly Taylor: [Dylan and Kelly are outside the hospital arguing] I know how that song goes!
Dylan McKay: You should, you taught it to me!
Kelly Taylor: So this is it?
Dylan McKay: It's what it looks like!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Fertile Ground (#10.15)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: [Dancing at the kids dance] You did a really good thing here.
Gina Kincaid: Thanks so did you.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: My Desperate Valentine (#2.16)" (1991)
Dylan McKay: Your afraid of what will happen to her if you dump her?
Brandon Walsh: Yeah, I guess.
Dylan McKay: Man, I'm afraid of what will happen to you if you don't!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Senior Poll (#3.25)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: I feel bad for Jackie because it's me she is mad at not Jackie!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Cuffs and Links (#4.24)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: Dylan: You okay?
Brenda Walsh: Brenda: Yeah, a little scared. One night in jail is definitely enough for me to realized I don't want to go back.
Kelly Taylor: Maybe, you should've thought of that before.
Dylan McKay: Kel.
Kelly Taylor: What? I'm sorry, I just don't know what you expect from me.
Dylan McKay: What is your problem?
Kelly Taylor: You want to know what my problem is? I am sick and tired of stepping aside everytime Brenda comes running to you with another crisis. Everytime you call, he runs whether it's Palm Springs in the middle of the night or jail, he runs. He's not your boyfriend anymore.
Brenda Walsh: And obviously you're not my friend anymore.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Christmas Comes This Time Each Year (#5.15)" (1994)
J. Jay Jones: I don't want you think of me as a private investigator or a bounty hunter... or some crackpot, drunkard, oddball ex-FBI agent-for-hire. Now, look at me. I want you to think of me as a salvage expert. Okay, here's how it is: I go after your dough and maybe I find it. If I do then, whatever amount I find, I get half.
Dylan McKay: What? Half? What... are we married or something?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: April Is the Cruelest Month (#1.18)" (1991)
[watching Donna smoke in a parking lot with some punk students]
Brenda Walsh: I don't believe this. Look at Donna. First she's ditching class, now she lighting up in the parking lot? What's gotten into her?
Dylan McKay: I don't think, "What's gotten into her?" I think what she's getting into.
Kelly Taylor: Trouble.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: That's the Guy (#9.26)" (1999)
Matt Durning: Dead end?
Dylan McKay: Definitely. What took you so long?
Matt Durning: I had to finish my beer.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: I'm Using You 'Cause I Like You (#10.14)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: You wanna thank me now, or you wanna "thank me" later.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Camping Trip (#2.7)" (1991)
Brenda Walsh: You lost a shoe!
Brandon Walsh: At least I still have my foot.
Dylan McKay: Two feet.
Brandon Walsh: Two feet.
Dylan McKay: Two arms.
Brandon Walsh: True two arms.
Brandon Walsh, Dylan McKay: And a head.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Life after Death (#5.4)" (1994)
Dylan McKay: Listen, Steve is my friend. I don't want to see him get burned if he found out about us.
Valerie Malone: Steve's a big boy, Dylan. If he doesn't like fire, he shouldn't be playing with matches.
Dylan McKay: Listen to you! You are truly a bad girl!
Valerie Malone: That depends on who you talk to.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Gypsies, Cramps and Fleas (#6.8)" (1995)
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: You're going to join the living!
[Holding a skeleton Halloween decoration]
Dylan McKay: So what do I do with young David Silver here?
[holding the skeleton that Toni gave him]
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Put him on the front door!
[He goes to the front door and a black cat is on the front step]
Dylan McKay: Oh look out! Trouble!
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Oh what do you mean trouble, she is adorable!
[Picks up the cat]
Dylan McKay: The last thing I need is a black cat. That is bad luck!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: A Night to Remember (#3.27)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: [after Gil Myers leaves, Dylan turns to Steve and David] We got to get her out of here before someone starts to get suspicious! Know what I mean?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: U4EA (#2.15)" (1991)
Dylan McKay: Your stoned man!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Agony (#9.25)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [Dylan arrives at the beach house] How is she doing?
Donna Martin: She needs sleep.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello (#9.7)" (1998)
Steve Sanders: Dylan, Hey man
Dylan McKay: Hey buddy
Steve Sanders: Right on. Come on in, it's good to see you
Dylan McKay: How you doing brother?
Donna Martin: Oh my god
David Silver: Good. You on vacation or something?
Steve Sanders: How long you back for?
Dylan McKay: I don't know
Steve Sanders: You know you just missed Valerie
Donna Martin: How's Brenda?
Dylan McKay: Why don't you call her and ask her
Donna Martin: Were sorry were just so good to see you
Kelly Taylor: What's going on?
Dylan McKay: Happy thanksgiving Kel
David Silver: So when you get in?
Dylan McKay: I cleared customs about an hour ago, you don't look happy to see me
Kelly Taylor: I'm just um shocked. How long are you staying?
Dylan McKay: I don't know, but I'm still waiting for my hug
Steve Sanders: I've been saving this for a special occasion
David Silver: Oh and there's no more a special occasion than this very occasion
Matt Durning: Who's that guy?
Kelly Taylor: Um an old friend
David Silver: To Dylan
Steve Sanders: Back amonst the living
Dylan McKay: For the moment


"Beverly Hills, 90210: A Clean Slate (#5.3)" (1994)
Valerie Malone: Is that a cue stick, or are you just happy to see me?
Dylan McKay: Well, the last time I saw you, you were running away. So...
Valerie Malone: I big emergency came up. I had to rotate my tires.
Dylan McKay: You know, you don't look like much of a mechanic.
Valerie Malone: Why? You need a lube job?
Dylan McKay: Who are you?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Emily (#4.13)" (1993)
David Silver: [Steve is in the Student Union wearing the dress and handing out flyers] You make the perfect Keg girl!
Steve Sanders: This is embarrassing enough without you here, so could you please just bail!
Kelly Taylor: I think he looks sexy.
Donna Martin: He is wearing my lipstick!
Steve Sanders: Enough already!
David Silver: Now I know why I didn't join a fraternity!
Dylan McKay: Must be a drag. Huh Steve... drag.
[He and David laugh and collapse on each other]
Steve Sanders: Yeah I get it! Ha! Now beat it.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Spring Dance (#1.20)" (1991)
Dylan McKay: We're not going to be judging each other up there. We're going to be enjoying each other.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Down and Out of District in Beverly Hills (#2.12)" (1991)
Brenda Walsh: I have never seen Steve so...
Dylan McKay: Happy?
Brenda Walsh: Right, since we moved here he has been after Kelly or chasing bimbos.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Mexican Standoff (#2.27)" (1992)
Jake Hanson: I'm Jake Hanson.
Brenda Walsh: Brenda Walsh. Dylan told me that you taught him how to surf.
Dylan McKay: How to surf. How to ride a motorcycle.
Jake Hanson: How to pick up girls.
Brenda Walsh: Well, fortunately he's unlearned a few of those lessons.
Dylan McKay: So, where are you living these days, man?
Jake Hanson: Oh, just a little place off Melrose. Nothing special.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: How to Be the Jerk Women Love (#9.11)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [to Steve and David] Who said I checked out.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Dog's Best Friend (#9.24)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: Present company excluded?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Isn't It Romantic? (#1.9)" (1991)
[Dylan is pouring himself a glass of scotch after an argument with his father]
Brenda Walsh: You don't drink, do you?
Dylan McKay: Only at family reunions.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Strangers in the Night (#4.6)" (1993)
Kelly Taylor: I think you should buy a big old pink Cadillac!
Brandon Walsh: Now that is you!
Dylan McKay: I'll take it under advisement... AS IF!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Love Hurts (#5.23)" (1995)
Andrea Zuckerman-Vasquez: So you wanted to meet me here to use my student discount card?
Dylan McKay: No, I think it was better to see you here than at the Palm Wind Motel.
[She starts to freak out and Dylan puts his arms on her shoulders]
Dylan McKay: Relax, nobody knows but me.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Sibling Revelry (#10.11)" (1999)
Kelly Taylor: [At his hotel room door] Matt thinks you are coming between him again.
Dylan McKay: Am I sensing a pattern here?
Kelly Taylor: Yeah, you are and I'm getting sick of it.
Dylan McKay: Sick of what?
Kelly Taylor: At this hinting around stuff. It's just a gift from a friend thing.
Dylan McKay: [Dylan looks shocked and he smiles] It was just a gift from a friend, that's it!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: You Gotta Have Heart (#5.20)" (1995)
Valerie Malone: Don't you love hotels? Of all the kinky things that go on in this place, it's inspiring.
Dylan McKay: Well, something tells me that's not what was inspiring Cindy when he called me in a panic, this morning.
Valerie Malone: You know, I knew those two weren't cool about this as they pretended to be.
Dylan McKay: They worry.
Valerie Malone: Well, you don't have to tell me that. Look, they're nice people, but you don't know how hard it was for me living there. I did the best I could. Trying to act all good and moral made me schizo. I just had to get out of that place. I'm just not a good or moral person. I never was, and never will be.
Dylan McKay: Most people get an apartment.
Valerie Malone: Most people would live like this if they could.
Dylan McKay: Yeah, you're probably right. But I gotta tell you though, speaking from experience, living in hotels can get pretty lonely.
Valerie Malone: Well, lucky me. I've already got my first visitor.
Dylan McKay: Okay, you'll see. Pretty soon, you'll start thinking the concierge is your best friend.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Family Tree (#10.9)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: One, you can't fire someone based on their sexual orientation. It's illegal. Two, I don't think I'll ever understand how unacceptable it is. Number three and this is important so you better listen, if you don't welcome back a man like that with open arms, I will stop funding this place and maybe it will be your job that will be elminated.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Sentenced to Life (#5.16)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: [Showing her the letter from the court] It's about my accident. I'm charged with driving under the influence.
Andrea Zuckerman-Vasquez: Took them long enough.
[Obviously disgusted that reality has set in for him]
Dylan McKay: I was beginning to think they wouldn't come. Time to face the music!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Rave On (#5.5)" (1994)
[last lines]
Valerie Malone: So Dylan, where did all your millions go? Huh, Dylan? They just flew away?
Dylan McKay: You want to know what happened? Life's a bitch, that's what happened! Somebody stole it, it's gone, there's nothing left! So, if we're playing night games... 'cause you think a little taste of it... the joke's on you, kid.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Doc Martin (#10.17)" (2000)
Dylan McKay: [to Kelly explaining about Noah's kidnapping, their brush with death, she goes white and apologizes] My life flashed before my eyes but your lectures went by a lot quicker!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: I Wanna Reach Right Out and Grab Ya (#9.21)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [At the Peach Pit] You should've seen me and Matt at the pool hall last night.
Gina Kincaid: A thousand bucks just like that?


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Anaconda (#2.4)" (1991)
[first lines]
Jim Walsh: Look, I can help you manage your finances, that's what I do very well. But if you keep putting this off, two things will happen. You will be flat broke and you will be in a lot of pain. If you don't take care of this right now, the courts will step in and when that happens, all hell will break loose. And frankly, I think you have a moral responsibility here as well. Do you have any idea how really serious this is?
Dylan McKay: Yeah, I guess I do.
Jim Walsh: Okay. Do you know what you have to do, Dylan? You get on a plane, you go to Hawaii, you make peace with your mother once and for all by telling her what's going on with you.
Dylan McKay: I wish it were that simple, but you don't understand my mother.
Jim Walsh: Yes, but I do understand a desperate situation when I see one.
Dylan McKay: You still don't get it? I said, you DON'T understand my mother! All my life... she threw money at me and called it love. I didn't ask for love, but to ask for money?
Jim Walsh: If you don't, you'll be asking for a lot worse.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Fortune Cookie (#9.20)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [At the hotel] Get dressed, I'll take you home.
Gina Kincaid: [Glares at him] No thanks. I'm going to go to the hotel spa.
Dylan McKay: I said we're leaving.
[His eyes showing anger and locked onto Gina's]
Gina Kincaid: I heard what you said.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Highwire (#3.9)" (1992)
Dylan McKay: When the bell rings go to your neutral corners and chill out!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Nine Yolks Whipped Lightly (#10.12)" (1999)
Dylan McKay: [to the kids after witnessing Dylan punch a belligerent neighbor to the rec center] What I did to that guy was wrong. I was wrong.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Commencement: Part 2 (#3.30)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: [Dylan's mom is standing on his front porch] Do you mind telling me what it is you have against the telephone?
Iris McKay: I would rather you tell me what it is you have against me.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Withdrawal (#9.13)" (1999)
David Silver: Do you know how psyched we all were when you came back?
Dylan McKay: The feeling was mutual.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Speechless (#6.6)" (1995)
Tony Marchette: Get him out of here!
Ronnie: No problem.
[Starts to get up]
Dylan McKay: Just ask, politely and I'll leave but I won't go away.
[Gets right in Tony's face]
Dylan McKay: I'll never go away until you are put away!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: It's a Totally Happening Life (#3.16)" (1992)
Brenda Walsh: Dylan, Kelly and I have been talking.
Dylan McKay: Always a dangerous trend!


"Beverly Hills, 90210: And Did It... My Way (#4.10)" (1993)
Nat Bussichio: [after John Sears leaves the Peach Pit] I didn't like that kid even when he was in high school; everytime he came around there would be trouble!
Dylan McKay: Let me ask you something; I've been with a lot women; why is it the two women I ever loved are running around with total dirt bags?
[Nat chuckles]


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Violated (#6.7)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: What you don't knock?
Bruno: I did but when you didn't answer I came around back.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Castles in the Sand (#3.6)" (1992)
Dylan McKay: In all the beaches, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Earthquake Weather (#6.9)" (1995)
Dylan McKay: [At Dylan's house on the couch] I was thinking of making an even bigger committment.
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Oh yeah, what was that?
Dylan McKay: I was thinking of getting married.
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Anyone special?
Dylan McKay: Not really, just this girl I know. Thing is; I don't know if she is into it.
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Guess you'll never know if you don't ask her.
Dylan McKay: Yep, I guess you're right.
[pauses]
Dylan McKay: Marry me.
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: That wasn't a question and you are not down on one knee.
Dylan McKay: Well you got a point.
[Gets down on one knee]
Dylan McKay: I do love you, will you marry me?
Antonia 'Toni' Marchette: Yes, I will.


"Beverly Hills, 90210: Something in the Air (#3.28)" (1993)
Dylan McKay: Tell Superintendent Ephardt that summer registration is going to break the record this year.
Steve Sanders: [to Ms. Teasley] Donna Martin graduates!
Kelly Taylor: [to Ms. Teasley] Donna Martin graduates!
Dylan McKay: Donna Martin graduates!
[Chant begins with Brenda]