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Quotes for
Dr. Charles Kroger (Character)
from "Monk" (2002)

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"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Red Herring (#3.10)" (2005)
[about Sharona]
Dr. Charles Kroger: Didn't she sell her house?
Adrian Monk: Yes.
Dr. Charles Kroger: And she moved back to New Jersey.
Adrian Monk: Yes.
Dr. Charles Kroger: And she remarried her ex-husband.
Adrian Monk: I'm not sure I like where you're going here.

[about Sharona]
Adrian Monk: You're a doctor. Can't you make her come back?
Dr. Charles Kroger: What would you like me to do? Fly back to New Jersey and drug her, bring her back here?
Adrian Monk: No. But thank you.
[pause]
Adrian Monk: She's pretty smart. She'd probably escape.


"Monk: Mr. Monk Gets a New Shrink (#5.7)" (2006)
Troy Kroger: There're no way I'm related to you two!
Dr. Charlie Kroger: I've taken the test three times, what more do you want?

Dr. Charlie Kroger: Adrian, I cannot continue to practice anymore after today. The police think that one of my patients killed Teresa Mueller. I should have seen it coming. I didn't; I missed it. This is all my fault.
Adrian Monk: This isn't happening. This can't be happening.
Dr. Charlie Kroger: Adrian, I promise you I'll get you another doctor. I'll call you next week.
Adrian Monk: Okay! So it's not true! You're not retiring! I mean, you can't because... He can't retire...
Dr. Charlie Kroger: [to Natalie] This is step one in the grieving process: denial.
Adrian Monk: Damn you, Charles! Damn you to hell! I hate you. I hate you! You are dead to me.
Natalie Teeger: That's not denial.
Dr. Charlie Kroger: No, step two, that's anger.
Adrian Monk: Okay. Okay, we're all adults here. We can work this out. I can hire you full time, all right? Put you on payroll.
Dr. Charlie Kroger: This is step three: bargaining. It usually doesn't go around this quickly.
Adrian Monk: Why me? Why is it always me? Everybody's always leaving me.
Natalie Teeger: Depression?
Dr. Charlie Kroger: Yeah.
Adrian Monk: This can't go on. I mean, it's just too much. Okay, you're right. It's not the end of the world. I'll just have to find another doctor. I owe you so much. Thanks to you, I think I can get past this. Thanks, doc.
Dr. Charlie Kroger: And finally, acceptance.
Natalie Teeger: Thank God that's over.
Adrian Monk: He can't retire! The man can't quit because he's not a quitter.
Natalie Teeger: Wait, what's going on?
Dr. Charlie Kroger: I don't know. It's like he's starting all over again, like he's in a loop.
Adrian Monk: I hate you for this, Kroger! You are dead to me! You understand me? Dead!
Dr. Charlie Kroger: I really should be heading home.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Three Julies (#6.13)" (2008)
Adrian Monk: The mother died three months ago, the son never reported it.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Now, hang on, did the son kill the mother?
Adrian Monk: The doctors say no, it was a heart aneurysm. Her son, Matthew, is an amateur taxidermist. He stuffed her body, carried her from room to room, like nothing happened.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Yeah, I've heard of cases like that. You see, he couldn't function without her. And they call it radical cognitive bonding.
Adrian Monk: At least I never dug Trudy up and had her stuffed and mounted, right?
Dr. Charles Kroger: Yes, and I've always been very proud of you for that.

[Monk having an apointment with Dr. Kroger after discovering the stuffed dead body of the old Mrs. Teeger]
Adrian Monk: I just wanna thank you again for seeing me on such short notice. Were you sleeping?
Dr. Charles Kroger: [sitting in his PJ] No! No, no, happy to do it.
Adrian Monk: Your wife wasn't too happy. I could hear her in the background.
Dr. Charles Kroger: No, Madeleine is fine. It's part of the job and she knows that.
Adrian Monk: Does she have tourette syndrome?
Dr. Charles Kroger: [thinking for a while] Yes! Yes she does.


"Monk: Mr. Monk Goes to the Asylum (#1.6)" (2002)
Sharona Fleming: He takes three showers every day with this star-shaped nozzle. This is the nozzle. And he needs a five watt night light for sleeping. Anything more, he won't sleep and dark-colored pillowcases.
Adrian Monk: Sharona?
Sharona Fleming: Nothing light, okay?
Adrian Monk: Sharona?
Sharona Fleming: What?
Adrian Monk: You're scaring the man.
Sharona Fleming: No, I'm not.
Adrian Monk: Well, you're scaring me.
Oliver: Ma'am, your friend's in good hands. I'm going to look after him personally. You can trust me.
Sharona Fleming: Mmm-hmmm.
Adrian Monk: See? I'm gonna be okay. You're worrying more than I am.
Sharona Fleming: Look. I can't protect you here, Adrian.
Adrian Monk: What could happen? It's a hospital.
Dr. Charles Kroger: This is all gonna be over before you even know it.

Dr. Charles Kroger: You're going to be fine. They just want to spend 48 hours with you to observe and evaluate.
[Monk notices a broken sign board]
Adrian Monk: Gee, that "B" - it's broken. Looks like an "R".
[He starts to fix it]
Adrian Monk: It's all...
Dr. Charles Kroger: Adrian. Adrian. You're gonna have to take this thing seriously. Judge Hackman says you're lucky those people didn't press charges... or shoot you. Now, the-the director's name is Morris Lancaster. He's one of the top psychiatrists in the country.
Sharona Fleming: Morris Lancaster? Yeah. He's good. I saw him on CNN.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Astronaut (#4.14)" (2006)
Adrian Monk: He killed his girlfriend.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Which I do not condone - it's indefensible, of course.

Dr. Charles Kroger: Which of your fears would you like to work on first?
Adrian Monk: Glaciers.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Glaciers.
Adrian Monk: No. Rodeos. Nah. Glaciers.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Billionaire Mugger (#1.7)" (2002)
Dr. Charles Kroger: A drive-by shooting? Do they have any leads?
Adrian Monk: Nothing on the bullets. They found the car a few blocks away. Stolen. A hundred percent clean. No prints.
Dr. Charles Kroger: You know, you, you, you don't seem very upset.
Adrian Monk: Well, it means I'm making someone very uneasy, and that's not such a bad thing.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Well, Sh-Sharona must have been terrified.
Adrian Monk: She quit. We had an argument about money. She took a job at a lamp store at Prospect Street. She'd rather sell lamps than work for me. Let me ask you something. Two weeks ago, she bought me this mug, it said "World's Greatest Boss". Are you allowed to do that-buy someone a mug and then just quit?
Dr. Charles Kroger: Well see, I-I don't think mugs are legally binding, Adrian.
[Monk chuckles]
Adrian Monk: I never had to think about money. Trudy used to pay all the bills.
Dr. Charles Kroger: While we're on that subject, there-there is something that I have to say.
Adrian Monk: Oh? Now, you see, this can't be good.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Well, no. The-the-the-the-fact is that, um, you see, I haven't been paid for the past nine weeks, nine sessions. Now, that's a lot of money.
Adrian Monk: Oh, my God. You're gonna leave me too.
Dr. Charles Kroger: No, no, no. I did not say that, Adrian.
Adrian Monk: I'm gonna be all alone. What a time to be me.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Adrian, I promise you. No one is leaving you.
Adrian Monk: Sharona did.
[Monk gasps for air]
Dr. Charles Kroger: Are-are-are you okay?
Adrian Monk: I hate owing you money. I just-I just hate it. Listen, until-until we get squared away, I'm gonna have to start seeing you twice a week.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Employee of the Month (#3.7)" (2004)
Dr. Charles Kroger: You know, Adrian, I see this all the time. I work with cops. I work with ex-cops. You see terrible things. People lie to you. After awhile, you don't believe anything.
Adrian Monk: I - I - I - I...
Dr. Charles Kroger: You're going to have to make the leap. You're going to have to trust. Otherwise you're going to be completely alone - and I hope that doesn't happen to you.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Big Reward (#4.13)" (2006)
Dr. Charles Kroger: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Adrian Monk: Well, I guess I'd hire you full time, and keep you on retainer 24/7. Maybe I'd buy you a house right next to mine so that I could just drop in, anytime.
[Chuckles]
Adrian Monk: This is fun. What would you do with a million dollars?
Dr. Charles Kroger: [Cautiously] Buy an island... a desert island... in the middle of nowhere.
Adrian Monk: So we would do our sessions over the phone?
Dr. Charles Kroger: Heh, you see this island, in my mind... no phone service.
Adrian Monk: I guess I'd have to buy a boat.
Dr. Charles Kroger: You see, that's funny because you see this island, in my fantasy... no dock.
Adrian Monk: Well, may the best man win.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Paperboy (#2.10)" (2004)
Dr. Charles Kroger: Adrian, we can sit here singing show tunes to each other, or we can talk about your sex life.
Adrian Monk: [singing] If ever I would leave you...


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Panic Room (#3.2)" (2004)
Dr. Charles Kroger: [Dr. Kroger is making a house call because a chimp is loose in Monk's apartment] I can see your space has been violated, and I think you're handling it very well. I'm proud of you. How do you feel?
Adrian Monk: [high-pitched voice] I'm fine... these things happen, what can you do?
Dr. Charles Kroger: Exactly, exactly. These are all material objects. You can replace anything that he breaks, or chews, or pees on.
Adrian Monk: Chews or pees on... chews or pees on...


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Actor (#5.1)" (2006)
Dr. Charles Kroger: That must have been a traumatic experience for you Adrian. And they cancelled the movie?
Adrian Monk: He said he wanted to play a character who wasn't so dark and depressing. He's in England doing Hamlet.
Dr. Charles Kroger: How about the little getaway you were planning? The weekend away?
[Adrian shakes his head]
Dr. Charles Kroger: All right, okay, maybe another time.
Adrian Monk: I guess I'm back to square one.
[groans]
Adrian Monk: It's good to be home.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Adrian, please don't be hard on yourself. I think we should go back to three days a week for just a little while. That would be Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Adrian Monk: And Tuesday.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Tuesday would be four days a week...
[Monk give Kroger a beleaguered look]
Dr. Charles Kroger: Okay, I could see that just until you're back on your feet...
Adrian Monk: And Thursday.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Oh no, Thursday is five days a week, Adrian.
[With his head in his hand Adrian moans]
Dr. Charles Kroger: Okay, that way five days a week would be easier to remember...
Adrian Monk: And Saturday.
Dr. Charles Kroger: Well, Saturday is the weekend and I don't like to see patients on the weekends.
Adrian Monk: Saturday!
Dr. Charles Kroger: Adrian, I have a family and I like to keep the weekend free...
Adrian Monk: [Desperately] Saturday!
Dr. Charles Kroger: Okay, we'll try that for a weekend or two. So that would be Monday, Tuesday...
Adrian Monk: And Sunday.


"Monk: Mr. Monk and the Sleeping Suspect (#2.7)" (2003)
Adrian Monk: [Dr Kroger is going on vacation for 3 weeks] Why didn't you tell me?
Dr. Charles Kroger: I did. I told you every week for the past month, but I guess you just, um, blocked it out.
Adrian Monk: Is that possible?
Dr. Charles Kroger: Apparently.
Adrian Monk: I guess I did... I blocked it out. No problem, we'll talk about it on Thursday.