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: Please! Please, let me stay here! Tom Valco
: No! Drew Latham
: I'll pay you. Tom Valco
: My family's not for sale, pal. Drew Latham
: I'll pay you $250,000! Tom Valco
: Welcome home, son.
: Hey, Dad. Christine Valco
: He's talking to you, genius. Tom Valco
: Yeah, Drew? Drew Latham
: Would you do me a kindness? Put this hat on. My dad always used to wear a Santa hat when we went Christmas tree shopping. Tom Valco
] In public? Drew Latham
: Yeah. Tom Valco
: Yeah, that would be no. And in private, that would be no, too. Drew Latham
: Please wear the hat. Tom Valco
: No. I'm not wearing the hat. Drew Latham
: Tom, you gotta wear the hat. Tom Valco
: I'm not wearing the hat. Drew Latham
: Wear the hat, Tom. Tom Valco
: I'm not wearing the hat. Now get it away from me before I shove it up your ass! Drew Latham
: Tom, are you familiar with the phrase "breach of contract"? Tom Valco
: Give me the hat!
: I think your mom's starting to like your grandfather hitting on her. Drew Latham
: There's a sentence you don't often hear on Christmas Eve.
: Tom, that guy is still here. Tom Valco
: Yeah, I know. Christine Valco
: Why is he still here? Tom Valco
: He's giving us $250,000 to be his family for Christmas. Christine Valco
: And you agreed to this without asking me? Tom Valco
: Of course I did, he's giving us $250,000! Christine Valco
: And how would you like it if I agreed to something like this without asking you? Tom Valco
: Well, that would depend. Would we be getting $250,000?
: How's the holidays? Tom Valco
: Considering I got a pain in my ass about six feet tall in my house, all right!
] Brian, get down here and eat your dinner, will you? Brian Valco
: I'm not hungry! Tom Valco
: Yeah, you are! Christine Valco
: Stop yelling at me. Tom Valco
: I'm not yelling at you. Brian! Christine Valco
] Brian! Get down here please, so your father can stop not yelling at me! Brian Valco
: I'm busy! Tom Valco
: I told you, we shouldn't have put the computer up in his room. He's gonna spend all his time there. Christine Valco
: Oh, Tom. Welcome to the future, dear. He's advancing his skills. One day that computer's gonna get our baby a good job. Tom Valco
: Trust me. What he's doing up there, nobody's gonna pay him for, 'cause if they did, I'd have retired at seventeen.
: Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, I agreed that you could stay here not Doo-Doo over here. Doo-Dah
: Doo-Dah. Tom Valco
: Nobody's talkin' to you.
: Know what happened to me on my way home? I got propositioned by a hooker. Doo-Dah
: She the blonde with the big cans? Tom Valco
: Hey, Doo-Doo. You watch your language in front of my daughter.
: [at the play watching Doo-Dah
] Christine. Christine Valco
: Hm? Tom Valco
: If I were to leave, I wouldn't know where to go. Christine Valco
: So why leave? Tom Valco
: That's what I'm saying, I don't want to leave. Christine Valco
: Then don't. Tom Valco
: Okay, I won't. Is that all right with you? Christine Valco
: [turns to him and smiles
] Yeah. It's fine with me.
[they take each other's hands during the play