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: [on phone
] Hey, honey. How's Alaska? Ted
: Oh, just great. Everything's white. Including my father!
: The dogs, where are they? Ted
: They're eating the house.
[Barb describes the dog food
: Mostly the stuff the butcher can't sell. Hooves, lips, organs... slump. Ted
: In Miami, we call them hot dogs.
: If you're ever in Miami, look me up. My number's on all the buses.
[Facing a wild bear
: Y'know, I'm a big bear fan! Sure. Uh, my man - Smokey the Bear. Yogi. Walter Payton!
: I can't believe you actually bit that dog on the ear. Ted
: But that's what everyone says you're supposed to do. Thunder Jack
: Well, sure, but... I never met a man dumb enough to do it!
: Demon's got it in his head that he's the alpha dog. You've gotta show him who's boss! Bite him on the ear! Ted
: I am not putting any part of that dog in my mouth!
: Why don't you try biting him on the ear? Ted
: What is it with you people?
: Never underestimate Theodore Brooks DDS!
: I'm the only man to win the Arctic Flame three years in a row. Ted
: Congratulations. Ernie
: But it is kind of an odd prize. Goes to the musher who finishes last. Ted
: In Miami three-times losers go to prison.
: Mom, I love that you're involved in my practice but you can't be giving out sugar cookies at a dental office. Amelia
: Your father always believed in the personal touch.