Cliff Barnes
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Quotes for
Cliff Barnes (Character)
from "Dallas" (2012)

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"Dallas: John Ewing III: Part 2 (#2.24)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: [cheerful] Hi.
Pamela Barnes Ewing: [coldly] Hello Cliff.
Cliff Barnes: Hello Cliff? What is this? No sisterly peck, no warmth, no affection?

Cliff Barnes: [confronted about his affair with Sue Ellen] No, look, believe it: I fell in love with her.
Bobby Ewing: The only time you fall in love is when you look in the mirror!
[pushes him onto a couch]

Cliff Barnes: [tearing up at the sight of Sue Ellen's new born baby] Well I know he's mine, and if he lives, he's gonna be raised a Barnes, not a Ewing. I swear that!

"Dallas: Kidnapped (#2.13)" (1978)
Sue Ellen Ewing: [Sue Ellen and Cliff share a moment when they notice J.R. is coming] Eh, any. Eh, news yet, Mr. Barnes?
Cliff Barnes: No, no, not yet.
J.R. Ewing: Sue Ellen, I know your manners are impeccable, but there are some people there's just no need to be polite to.
[takes her away from Barnes]

Cliff Barnes: I never thought I'd be glad to see you.
Bobby Ewing: You look pretty good yourself.
Al Parker: Save the reunion, gentlemen!

Cliff Barnes: [on phone at Southfork] I wanna talk to Ewing.
Al Parker: [on other line, in phonebooth] No.
Cliff Barnes: I wanna know that he's alive.
Al Parker: He's alive.
Cliff Barnes: Come on, man, be reasonable. You want one million five, I want proof.
Al Parker: I don't gotta be reasonable, I got Bobby Ewing!

"Dallas: Legacies (#2.15)" (2013)
[Cliff is in jail for the murder of J.R. and has refused Bobby's offer of help]
Cliff Barnes: Who killed J.R.?
Bobby Ewing: You'll *never* know, Cliff.

[Cliff has found out that the Ewings have beaten him again, with Pamela's help]
Cliff Barnes: Oh Pamela, you have just made the most grievous error of your young life.

"Dallas: JR's Masterpiece (#2.8)" (2013)
[Cliff just interrupted JR's wake]
Cliff Barnes: I came to pay my *disrespects*!

[Cliff is being forced out of JR's wake]
Cliff Barnes: *Now who's dancing on who's grave!*

"Dallas: The Red File: Part 1 (#2.17)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: I have a job to do. I intend to use the full power of this office to bury J.R. Ewing.

Julie Grey: [Cliff is eating junk food] Well for a politician you sure take rotten care of your most valuable possession.
Cliff Barnes: What?
Julie Grey: Your mouth.

"Dallas: The Price You Pay (#1.3)" (2012)
Cliff Barnes: You are never gonna be one of them, Christopher, and don't let them destroy you like they did Pam.

Cliff Barnes: Well, you're lookin' pretty spry for all you've been through, old pal. Cliff Barnes, remember me?
J.R. Ewing: Time has not been kind to that face. But I do recall the smell of brimstone and crazy...

"Dallas: Mother of the Year (#3.13)" (1979)
Sue Ellen Ewing: You are wrong. I love my son!
Cliff Barnes: You can't love anyone. All you can do, is use.

"Dallas: Election (#2.8)" (1978)
[Cliff found out that Pam had revealed the truth to the Ewings]
Cliff Barnes: You know, the Ewings destroy anything they get their hands on! And you're one of them now. You live with vipers, you become a viper! So why don't you go back to where you belong?

"Dallas: Act of Love (#2.10)" (1978)
Sue Ellen Ewing: I'm just so tired of J.R. getting everything he wants and always winning.
Cliff Barnes: So you picked me, the loser... Well I've got to tell you something: I've been beaten before, but I have never lost. Understand the difference?

"Dallas: The Silent Killer (#3.3)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: When I'm through with Ewing Oil, they're gonna be wiped out. Flat broke.
Digger Barnes: I never wanted that.
Cliff Barnes: See, but I can do it. J.R. tried to stop me but he can't. He's tried every trick in the book, he just happens to be fresh outta tricks.
Digger Barnes: You know you get to sound just like one of them? One of the Ewings! I only want what's coming to me. I don't want to see Jock Ewing flat broke.
Cliff Barnes: He's gonna be flat broke! That's simple justice. Just the way it is...

"Dallas: Jock's Trial: Part 1 (#3.22)" (1980)
Cliff Barnes: Sloan, I might have to work with ya, but I don't have to like you.
Lyle Sloan: You're still sore 'cause I almost put you in jail for the murder of Julie Grey, hm?
Cliff Barnes: How did you guess?

"Dallas: Showdown at the Ewing Corral (#12.7)" (1988)
JR Ewing: It'll be sub-zero in hell before I let you work here.
Cliff Barnes: Sharpen up your ice skates, JR. It's gonna be a long winter.

"Dallas: The Red File: Part 2 (#2.18)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: [Cliff is in jail] Oh, there's Bobby Ewing. He must have come to bug my cell.

Dallas: The Early Years (1986) (TV)
[last lines]
Young Cliff: Come on, Pam, we're leaving!
Young Pam: [as her older brother drags her away] Bye, Bobby!

"Dallas: The Decline and Fall of the Ewing Empire (#14.21)" (1991)
Cliff Barnes: [Cliff just caught his secretary taking down the Ewing Oil sign] What is going on here?
Jackie Dugan: I thought now that you own Ewing Oil, you'd want to change the name.
Cliff Barnes: Are you crazy? Not only do I want the name to stay 'Ewing Oil', but in big bold letters underneath I want it to say 'Cliff Barnes, President'! Then I'm going to take a picture of it and send it to J.R.

"Dallas: Ellie Saves the Day (#3.12)" (1979)
Sue Ellen Ewing: How did you find me?
Cliff Barnes: Does it matter?
Sue Ellen Ewing: Well, it matters to me. I already have one man who likes having me followed around by private detectives and I don't need another man doing the same thing.

"Dallas: The Lost Child (#3.7)" (1979)
Pamela Barnes Ewing: Cliff, you are so consumed with hate for the Ewings, I don't think you know how to love any more.
Cliff Barnes: I learned a very valuable lesson about power from the Ewings: if you wanna help the little guy, you have to operate from a postion of strength.
Pamela Barnes Ewing: Well, since you've had it, all you've done is try to destroy Ewing Oil.
Cliff Barnes: No, I've stopped the oil companies from raping the land.

"Dallas: Spy in the House (#1.3)" (1978)
Cliff Barnes: I've told you before, that after six o'clock, Mr. Spider turns into a prince.
Julie Grey: Too bad I'll never see the transformation.
Cliff Barnes: Yes you can, if you'll have dinner with me.

"Dallas: Black Tide (#13.8)" (1989)
Lucy Ewing: [J.R. had called Ray a half-breed just before finding out James Beaumont was his son] Well, here you are talking about half-breeds and now you've got your own illegitimate son. Congratulations.
Cliff Barnes: Yeah, from me too. Although I'm surprised we haven't seen more little bastards come out of the woodwork.
April Stevens: That's enough.
Cliff Barnes: [to Cally] Oh, don't be surprised, honey. I'm sure he's knocked up at least half the women in Texas.
April Stevens: You're being a jerk, Cliff.
Cliff Barnes: Don't get high and mighty on me. After all, you were once in JR's stable.
[April smacks Cliff hard]

"Dallas: Double Wedding (#2.6)" (1978)
Sue Ellen Ewing: You do have a way of popping up at the oddest times.
Cliff Barnes: Like a defective toaster?

"Dallas: The Heiress (#3.11)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: [to Alan Beam] It's no disgrace to do battle with J.R.

"Dallas: Paternity Suit (#3.17)" (1980)
Cliff Barnes: You interviewing my daddy? Sit down.
Debra Johns: As a matter of fact, he's given me a story that my paper would like to print. But I need your corroboration, because it could prove extremely embarrassing to J.R. Ewing.
Cliff Barnes: Anything that can embarrasing him has got to be true.

"Dallas: Jock's Trial: Part 2 (#3.23)" (1980)
Cliff Barnes: [Bobby has pushed Cliff against a wall] Get your hands off me!
Bobby Ewing: And what are you gonna do about it, have me arrested too? You want a real murder charge? Damn it, I'll give you one: yours!

"Dallas: Sue Ellen's Sister (#2.19)" (1979)
Wally Kessel: You're using Ewing money to get the Ewings. I got to hand it to ya, boy, you sure did grow up devious.
Cliff Barnes: No, that's just a recent development.

"Dallas: For Love or Money (#2.15)" (1979)
Cliff Barnes: Look, I can't explain it. J.R. just pushes certain buttons and mayby I got to learn to play the other man's game.
Sue Ellen Ewing: So that's what it is, just a game?
Cliff Barnes: No.
Sue Ellen Ewing: The winner takes the marbles and goes home. Is that what I am, just the marbles?

"Dallas: The Last Hurrah (#1.4)" (2012)
Cliff Barnes: I will never stop fighting for what is rightfully mine. And I know you are the same way.
J.R. Ewing: I'm a changed man, Cliff. Evidence of that is the fact that you're not being wheeled out of here with two broken legs.

"Dallas: The Kristin Affair (#3.5)" (1979)
Pamela Barnes Ewing: But you know it would help if everybody wasn't under so much pressure from you.
Cliff Barnes: That is not going to change until I break J.R.

"Dallas: Second Thoughts (#3.20)" (1980)
Cliff Barnes: You can tell Bobby Ewing, that you can take your legal assistant's job and stuff it! I'll rot in hell before I'll accept a handout from a Ewing.

"Dallas: Black Market Baby (#2.5)" (1978)
B.J. 'Buzz' Connors: Miss Ewing, my name's Buzz Connors. This is, eh, Cliff Barnes.
Sue Ellen Ewing: Cliff Barnes? I've heard a lot about you.
Cliff Barnes: Oh, I'm sure you have. I can't imagine any of it having being favorable.
Sue Ellen Ewing: Well, you're much more attractive than your reputation.
Cliff Barnes: You're far too pretty to be a Ewing.
B.J. 'Buzz' Connors: Cliff was just leaving.