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: Ow! I just cut my nose with this paperclip!
: Look, I'm not gonna be around to take care of you anymore. Well see, the thing is, even when I'm not around I'm gonna be around. I mean I want you to have fun, get into trouble. Just don't be 'obsequious' or 'phlegmatic' and when you think of me, don't be 'lugubrious' Kevin Arnold - The Narrator
: Let's face it: the guy was no orator.
: Happy birthday, Dad. You're not getting older. That'd be impossible.
: Some guys bet me twenty bucks I couldn't find out Maniac's real name. Kevin Arnold
: And you think a can of soda is gonna do it? Wayne Arnold
: No, no, no. This is just the icebreaker. Kevin Arnold
: You're out of your mind. Wayne Arnold
: Hey, for twenty bucks I'd lick the paint off our house with my tongue. Kevin Arnold - The Narrator
: I got news for you: a year later he did it for ten.