No Photo Available
Top Links
main detailsbiographyby votesphoto galleryquotes
by yearby typeby ratingsby votesby TV seriesby genreby keyword
Did You Know?
photo galleryquotes

Quotes for
Eunice Burns (Character)
from What's Up, Doc? (1972)

The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
What's Up, Doc? (1972)
Eunice: I'm not looking for romance, Howard.
Howard: Oh?
Eunice: No, I'm looking for something more important than that, something stronger. As the years go by, romance fades and something else takes its place. Do you know what that is?
Howard: Senility?
Eunice: Trust!
Howard: That's what I meant.

Eunice: [while Judge Maxwell is making a list of crimes with which to charge a group of people] They tried to molest me.
Judge Maxwell: That's...
[looks at Eunice]
Judge Maxwell: unbelievable.

Eunice: Don't you know the meaning of propriety?
Judy: Propriety; noun: conformity to established standards of behavior or manner, suitability, rightness, or justice. See "etiquette."

Fritz: I am afraid one of our guests has lost something.
Eunice: Well, I fail to see how it could possibly be in here unless it crawled here under its own power.
Fritz: Precisely Miss Burns.
Eunice: What are you saying?
Fritz: It appears one of our guests, a wealthy eccentric, has lost his pet snake.
[Eunice screams and jumps onto the bed]
Fritz: Calm yourself, Miss Burns. May I suggest you shut yourself in the bathroom for a few moments while I search your room?
Eunice: What if it's in there?
Fritz: Impossible, madam. Snakes, as you know, live in mortal fear of... tile.
[Eunice scurries into the bathroom]
Fritz: [reaches under bed and pulls out one of the cases] It's all right Miss Burns. You can come out now.
Eunice: What more can they do to me?

Judy: Steve, you didn't tell me you were married.
Howard: We're not married.
Judy: Congratulations.
Eunice: But we will be soon.
Judy: Condolences.

Banquet Receptionist: This woman claims to be a Eunice Burns.
Eunice: I am not "A" Eunice Burns, I am "THE" Eunice Burns!

Eunice: Now, tell me how you are going to introduce yourself.
Howard: What? Oh, well, I'll probably say something like "Hello there, Mr Larrabee. I'm Howard."
Eunice: You are not.
Howard: I am not Howard.
Eunice: You are not going to say "Hi, my name's Howard." Anyone could say that! Anyone.
Howard: Anyone named Howard.

Eunice: [fighting off a waiter trying to restrain her] Howard! Howard Bannister! They're trying, they're trying to keep me out!
Frederick Larrabee: [to Howard] Who is that dangerously unbalanced woman?
Eunice: Howard! Howard! Tell them who I am. Tell them who I am. I *demand* that you tell them who I am right this minute.
Howard: [after a long pause] I never saw this woman before in my life.
[Eunice faints and is dragged from the room, leaving scuff marks on the floor. Judy whistles]

Eunice: Well come in, I'll do your tie.
Howard: What tie is that Eunice?
Eunice: Your tie. The tie in your hand.

Howard: Eunice. Eunice. Eunice, please open the door, I have wonderful news.
Eunice: I do not want your apologies Howard. I think it is too late for that.
Howard: All right. No apologies.
Eunice: Have you no heart? I would have thought after all you have done you would come crawling for forgiveness.

Eunice: Mr Larrabee.
Frederick Larrabee: Frederick.
Eunice: Frederick. Will you help me?
Frederick Larrabee: Yes, I will. Who are you?
Eunice: I am Eunice Burns.
Hugh: Who cares who she is. We're going to be killed.

Eunice: Since when have you taken bubble baths?
Howard: It came out of the faucet that way, Eunice.

Eunice: Why are your rocks in the bathroom?

Judy: I think I'll get dressed now.
Eunice: [on telephone] Howard, who was that?
Howard: Who was what?
Eunice: I heard a voice say something about getting dressed.
Howard: It's the television set, Eunice. There's a movie on, a war movie. They're getting dressed for the big battle.
Eunice: It was a woman's voice!
Howard: Yes, they're lady soldiers, Eunice. It's called the "Fighting WACs".

Judy: [to operator on hotel phone] Uh, Miss Eunice Burns, please.
Eunice: [Answers phone] Yes?
Judy: [Switches to heavy Brooklyn accent] Miss Burns, uh this is Sylvia, Mr. Larrabee's personal secretary. There's been a little mixup in the invitation for this afternoon.
Eunice: Yes.
Judy: Yes. The luncheon has been switched from Mr. Larrabee's home to one of the Larrabee Foundation offices.
Eunice: Oh, but Mr. Bannister has already gone for the...
Judy: Oh yes, I managed to catch Mr. Bannister on his way out and tell him. The address of the luncheon is - uh do you have a pencil, darling?
Eunice: Yes.
Judy: 459 Dirello Street.
Eunice: Dirello...
Judy: Yes, Second floor.
Eunice: I see. Well thank you, Miss...
Judy: Uh Louise.
Eunice: I thought you said 'Sylvia'?
Judy: Uh yes, Sylvia-Louise, you know, with a hyphen.

Eunice: What is that?
Howard: It's a bath, Eunice. I was going to take a bath.
Eunice: Since when do you take bubble baths?
Howard: It came out of the faucet that way.

Judge Maxwell: Officer! What are these people being charged with
Arresting Officer: It's kind of hard to explain, Judge.
Judge Maxwell: Give it a shot.
Arresting Officer: Well we picked most of them out of San Francisco bay.
Judge Maxwell: Entering the country illegally?
Arresting Officer: No sir, they drove in.
Judge Maxwell: Into the country?
Arresting Officer: Into the bay.
Judge Maxwell: Ah, that's better. Unauthorized use of public water.
Arresting Officer: Mostly in stolen cars.
Judge Maxwell: Ah ha, that's grand larceny.
Arresting Officer: Then there was a shooting...
Judge Maxwell: That's assault with a deadly weapon.
Frederick Larrabee: They broke into my home.
Judge Maxwell: That's breaking and entering.
Frederick Larrabee: [indicating Eunice] And brought her with them forcibly!
Judge Maxwell: That's kidnapping.
Eunice: They tried to molest me.
Judge Maxwell: That's... unbelievable.

Fritz: Don't touch his rocks.
Eunice: I'll take care of those.

Eunice: Don't kick those rocks, you Philistine!