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] Jeff Dearly
: I want half. And don't give me none of that "fifty-percent" shit.
: Look, I heard you the first time, Bobby. I ain't mute.
: Dude, she's like 13. Jeff
: Where's my car? Deputy Jimmy D.
: Well Jeff, it's a little bit more serious than you're car.
] Jeff Dearly
: Would someone mind tellin me what the hell's goin on? Deputy Tony Carlucci
: Your mother drove her car into the lake Jeff, I'm afraid she's dead. Jeff Dearly
: What was she doing in my car?
: [while threatening to kill himself
] I know you all think I killed my parents. Chief Wyatt Rash
: We don't think you killed anybody! Jeff
: Yeah? Well, you're full of shit! Everyone know I've been wanting to get back at her ever since that night...
[a flashback shows Mona cleaving a sausage
: Hey, Ma, there's no more beer. Give me some of yours. Mona Dearly
: Don't touch that beer, Jeff. Jeff
: [reaches out
] Oh, give it to me. Mona Dearly
: I SAID...
[cleaves his hand clean off
: [screams in pain
[back to present, everyone goes disgusted in shock
: Was I so wrong? Feege
: You bet your ass. Jeff
: Yeah, but, I didn't kill her. Look, don't get me wrong: I'm glad she's dead and all, but I sure as hell didn't do it. Chief Wyatt Rash
: Jeff, I know you didn't kill her. Jeff
: I didn't kill my dad neither. Chief Wyatt Rash
: Then why don't you give me the gun. Jeff
: [puts the gun to head
] BECAUSE MY LIFE SUCKS, MAN!
: [after grabbing the golf club Mona is using to damage Bobby's Yugo
] God... this is. I mean, enough's enough. All I ever wanted was a nice professional business so that Ellie and I could have a... Jeff Dearly
: [Cuts off Bobby and begins tapping his thumb and middle finger together
] Ya, ya, ya, you know what this is? This is the world's smallest tambourine, and it's, and it's playing some sort of song or something. Mona Dearly
: Shut up! Shut up! That's a violin, you asshole, give me that thing, give me that!