Denise Huxtable
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Quotes for
Denise Huxtable (Character)
from "The Cosby Show" (1984)

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"The Cosby Show: Jitterbug Break (#1.16)" (1985)
[Denise asks Theo if she can borrow some money for a concert]
Theo: Hey, if Dad lets you go, I'll give you five hundred dollars.
Denise: You don't have five hundred dollars!
Theo: Do I look worried?

Denise: Dad, I'd like permission to sleep away from home tonight.
Cliff: Ok, are you going to sleep at a friend's house?
Denise: No.
Cliff: Are you going to sleep at a stranger's house?

[Denise has asked Cliff to sleep on 32nd St for tickets to a concert. Cliff is laughing]
Cliff: 32nd St. Where?
Denise: On 32nd St... itself.
Cliff: Why, have you volunteered to be a pothole?

[Cliff is dancing and Denise is watching him]
Denise: Dad, promise me something. When my friends come over... don't do that.

[Denise has unsuccessfully tried to get permission from Cliff to sleep on 32nd St]
Cliff: You're not going. I love you. You're not going.
Denise: You said you would have an open mind.
Cliff: 32nd St closed it up, dear.

"The Cosby Show: Live and Learn (#6.25)" (1990)
[Denise explains her bad grade to her parents]
Denise: If you have 60% of a pie, that's still a lot of pie!

Denise: I wrote one for history, check it out,
[drumming on the table and rapping]
Denise: Columbus sailed the ocean blue in fourteen hundred and ninety-two. When he got to the shore he said 'let's talk' on the place he called Plymouth Rock.
Rebecca Shorter: Denise, Columbus sailed to the Caribbean in 1492, the Pilgrims landed on Plymouth Rock in 1620.
Denise: Oh.

Rebecca Shorter: I'll check it out, and maybe you can even perform an assembly.
Denise: Yeah?
Rebecca Shorter: Yeah, but not on Christopher Columbus.

"The Cosby Show: It's All in the Game (#7.5)" (1990)
Denise: Olivia what are you doing? You know you're not supposed to touch any machines in this house. Now why did you put your crayons in the washer with Theo's pants?
Olivia Kendall: Because the label on the crayon said "washable".
Denise: Olivia sweetheart that means you can wash it off of the walls, your skin or your clothes.
Olivia Kendall: I wish someone had told me that.

Theo: Dad, all those stories we've come to find out are not true.
Cliff: What? What? Who said? From who?
Theo, Denise, Vanessa, Rudy: Grandpa!
Cliff: You're going to believe a man that age?

Denise: [talking about Theo's bad baseball experience] Okay, so it took a little time. What's the big deal?
Cliff: Right! No big deal! Now there's the key. You guys always say things like "no big deal." Some of the greatest lies ever told by you kids - "No big deal." "I forgot." "I'll pay you back later." "It was like that when I found it. I swear, Mom, Dad..."
Cliff, Clair: It was like that when I found it.
Vanessa: [about the car she crashed] Mom, Dad, I just want to say that I'm really sorry.
Clair: Please add that to the list. "I'm really sorry."
Cliff: Yes, and the other one that's key - "What are you doing home so early?"

"The Cosby Show: Together Again and Again (#5.1)" (1988)
Denise Huxtable: I've decided to discontinue my college education.
Clair Hanks Huxtable: Come again, young lady?
Denise Huxtable: I'm not going back to Hillman.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Wanna bet?

Denise Huxtable: And, who am I? An industrious young woman who wants to examine life without... pressure!
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: And how much does that pay?

Denise Huxtable: I mean, is a person who makes an A better than a person who makes a C?
Clair Hanks Huxtable: No.
Denise Huxtable: [chuckles] I was sure you were going to say yes!

"The Cosby Show: The Storyteller (#6.26)" (1990)
Olivia Kendall: But God made all the animals so I can see them at the zoo.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Well God also made me your stepmother and put me in charge and I say you're going to church.

Denise Huxtable Kendall: Oh, Gramtee, you were a school teacher, weren't you?
Aunt Gramtee: Yes, I taught grades 1 through 8 in one room.
Rudy Huxtable: [shocked] One room?
Aunt Gramtee: That's right. Many of the children had to walk 12 miles to and from school. And when they went home, they had to work their farms until the sun went down.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: It was so much harder to get an education back then.
Aunt Gramtee: You know, during slavery in some states, it was illegal to teach a slave to read.
Rudy Huxtable: Illegal to learn how to read?
Aunt Gramtee: Now your great-great-great aunt Lucinda grew up in slavery. But she was determined to learn to read. She used to play with the owner's daughters, the Hawthorne girls. They had tutors. The Hawthorne girls were beginning to feel bad because they were learning how to read and Lucinda couldn't. So after their class they would sneak her down to the creek and teach Lucinda everything they had learned.
Rudy Huxtable: Could aunt Lucinda have gotten in trouble?
Aunt Gramtee: Oh, yes. She could have been severely punished. But that didn't scare her. She was determined to learn to read. And after slavery she became a teacher.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Is that what inspired you to become a teacher?
Aunt Gramtee: I guess we could say she was an inspiration.

"The Cosby Show: Denise Kendall: Babysitter (#6.6)" (1989)
Denise: A videotape? You guys actually let an electronic instrument baby sit your children?
Elvin Tibideaux: Yes, and we're proud of it.

Denise: [closing the door as Bob leaves] That was Bob...
[she turns to Olivia and cracks up]
Denise: B-O-B!

"The Cosby Show: Period of Adjustment (#7.4)" (1990)
Olivia Kendall: I'll do my part. But I hope Pam doesn't boss me around too much.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Why would she do that?
Olivia Kendall: Because that's what old people do. It's their job.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Olivia, Pam is only seventeen.
Olivia Kendall: Wow! She's older than I thought!

"The Cosby Show: How Ugly Is He? (#1.9)" (1984)
Denise Huxtable: So, Daddy, how do you like David?
Cliff: I don't know if that's him. He hasn't found himself yet.

"The Cosby Show: Goodbye, Mr. Fish (#1.2)" (1984)
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: This is not a Hollywood funeral. Now, take the sunglasses off.
Denise Huxtable: [Denise takes them off and Cliff sees she's put on strange makeup]
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Put the sunglasses back on!

"The Cosby Show: A Shirt Story (#1.5)" (1984)
Denise Huxtable Kendall: [Theo's complaining about the shirt fitting horribly] Well maybe if you tuck it in a little...
Theo: [through gritted teeth] It's tucked into my socks!

"The Cosby Show: Denise's Friend (#2.11)" (1985)
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Remember when I spent the night at Janet's house a few weeks ago? Well I didn't spend the night at Janet's I spent the night at Tommy Watkins.
Vanessa Huxtable: YOU WHAT?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: How - how come Mr. and Mrs. Watkins did tell us?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: They were on vacation.
Vanessa Huxtable: They were?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: We didn't do anything, just listened to some records.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Are you angry?
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Ask your mother.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Mom, are you angry?
Clair Hanks Huxtable: Oh no, I'm not angry... I'm MAD!

"The Cosby Show: Vanessa's Bad Grade (#2.14)" (1986)
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Vanessa and I have fought over clothes before.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Yes, but not to the death!

"The Cosby Show: Theo and the Older Woman (#2.5)" (1985)
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Mom, Dad. I need your help.
Clair Hanks Huxtable: What's up?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Theo. He is acting weird and he is ruining my project.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Oh dear. How is he acting weird and ruining your project.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: He is trying to impress Susanne.
Clair Hanks Huxtable: What is he doing?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: He has changed his clothes, he cleans his room and now he is upstairs studying.
Dr. Heathcliff 'Cliff' Huxtable: Well. We'll see if we could get her to move in.

"The Cosby Show: Pilot (#1.1)" (1984)
Heathcliff Huxtable: Where are you going?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: I have a date, Daddy.
Heathcliff Huxtable: [referring to the belt on her leg] Uh, not like that, blood cannot get up to your brain from there! And besides, it's a school night.
Denise Huxtable Kendall: It's Friday, Daddy.
Heathcliff Huxtable: Yeah, but did you go to school today?
Denise Huxtable Kendall: Yeah...
Heathcliff Huxtable: And so it's a "school night".