Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski
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Quotes for
Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski (Character)
from "The Wire" (2002)

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"The Wire: Know Your Place (#4.9)" (2006)
Roland 'Prezbo' Pryzbylewski: I don't get it. All this so we score higher on the state tests? If we're teaching the kids the test questions, what is it assessing in them?
Grace Sampson: Nothing. It assesses us. The test scores go up, they can say the schools are improving. The scores stay down, they can't.
Roland 'Prezbo' Pryzbylewski: Juking the stats.
Grace Sampson: Excuse me?
Roland 'Prezbo' Pryzbylewski: Making robberies into larcenies. Making rapes disappear. You juke the stats, and majors become colonels. I've been here before.
Grace Sampson: Wherever you go, there you are.

"The Wire: Mission Accomplished (#3.12)" (2004)
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: "Failure to properly identify myself as a police officer." Sounds like what I was guilty of most of my career, actually.

"The Wire: The Detail (#1.2)" (2002)
Lt. Cedric Daniels: What're you doing here at two in the morning?
Det. Ellis Carver: Field interviews. Police work.
Lt. Cedric Daniels: "Police work." I got a 14-year-old kid in critical but stable condition at University and two witnesses who say one of you princes cold-cocked him with the butt end of a pistol.
Det. Thomas 'Herc' Hauk: No sir.
Lt. Cedric Daniels: I got his mother over at I.I.D. filing a formal brutality charge, which for Herc will make an even four in the last two years!
Det. Thomas 'Herc' Hauk: Unsustained...
Lt. Cedric Daniels: But all of 'em true!
Det. Thomas 'Herc' Hauk: Lieutenant, we thought that...
Lt. Cedric Daniels: I got one less Crown Vic than I had last night, I'm out two Kevlar vests that burned in the car, two hand-held radios, a shotgun and I'm about to lose this idiot here for a week or two of medical! And for WHAT?
Det. Ellis Carver: Lieutenant, we thought...
Lt. Cedric Daniels: What did you learn when you went into the Terrace at two in the morning to conduct field interviews? What valuable information did we acquire from this situation? I.I.D. is gonna be on all three of you by afternoon. If you don't get a story straight by then, you're gonna have a file thick enough to see the light of a trial board. Now, tell me, who cold-cocked the kid?
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: [after several seconds of silence] Me.
Lt. Cedric Daniels: [intensely] Why?
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: He pissed me off.
Lt. Cedric Daniels: No, Officer Pryzbylewski, he did NOT piss you off. He made you fear for your safety and that of your fellow officers.

"The Wire: Unto Others (#4.7)" (2006)
Roland 'Prezbo' Pryzbylewski: Trick 'em into thinking they aren't learning, and they do.

"The Wire: Time After Time (#3.1)" (2004)
[about a drug dealer incapable of using code on the phone]
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: If that idiot worked for us, he'd be a deputy commissioner by now.

"The Wire: Moral Midgetry (#3.8)" (2004)
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: OK, on that burner? I called Trac, gave them the serial number. Trac Corporation told me they sent it to Northland, a purchasing corporation. Northland tells me they sent it to their distribution center in Hagerstown. Hagerstown tells me they sent it to Buddy's Mondo Mart at 1440 Propane Road, Falls Church, Va. That's where it went out into the street.
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: What?
Lt. Cedric Daniels: Did Buddy have them on display to the left or the right of the cash register?
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: How would I know that?

"The Wire: Slapstick (#3.9)" (2004)
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: [reading from a fortune cookie] "A new friend makes himself known."
Det. James 'Jimmy' McNulty: "Himself"? If it was "herself," then you'd have a fortune.
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: Shit, I'm married. With lawn furniture, man.

"The Wire: Hamsterdam (#3.4)" (2004)
Det. Lester Freamon: Seems that Stringer Bell is worse than a drug dealer . . .
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: He's a developer.

"The Wire: Backwash (#2.7)" (2003)
Det. Roland 'Prez' Pryzbylewski: What if they're not sneaking anything off this time? What then?
Det. Lester Freamon: Ah then, tragically, you will have wasted yet another day in a life you've already misspent in the service of the City of Baltimore.