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: Mom, why do you always wear the high tops? Daphne Wilder
: I just got these, what's wrong with these? Maggie
: There just kinda depressing. Milly
: Mom for your 60th birthday we'll buy you something beautiful, something that grandma Moses would not wear.
: [discussing sex
] I swear, by the third time I was so loud car alarms were going off and dogs were barking. Daphne Wilder
: What? Three times? Is that... is that normal? Mae
: Oh, come on, we all know I hold the record in this family.
[holds up seven fingers, Milly Smirks
] Daphne Wilder
: Milly, honey, why are you so quiet? Mae
] 'Cause she's doing the oompa-loompa with two guys, mom.
] Daphne Wilder
: God couldn't be everywhere so that is why he invented mothers. Maggie
: What? That was on a Hallmark card we gave you
: [after hearing Jason kind of propose to Milly
] Did he just propose? Because I think he just proposed. Maggie
: I think he did, but the question is to who? Daphne Wilder
: Maggie quit being a kill joy.
: Listen! You're right! I didn't handle this well. And I understand you feel betrayed! But, really, isn't some of this anger a little misplaced? Milly
: No! No, Maggie! It's placed exactly where it should be and there is plenty to go around, so don't worry, mom will be getting hers!
: [after Daphne screams while being knocked over with groceries while on the phone
] Always so dramatic. Maggie
: [Daphne continues to moan on the ground
] Mother, this is like 6th grade drama club. Speak English!
: Cooper is in heat. Maggie
: Mom, Cooper is a boy.