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Quotes for
Doug Dorsey (Character)
from The Cutting Edge (1992)

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The Cutting Edge (1992)
Kate: What do you do, shower once a week?
Doug: Is that an invitation?

[preparing to lift Kate]
Doug: You want my hands *where*?

Kate: I'm sure there's nothing I do that you'd find exciting. I don't open beer bottles with my toes, I don't sit around and count what's left of my teeth, hey, I don't even enjoy a good tractor pull. It's been a limited existence, but I've gotten used to it.
Doug: Life of the party, huh? Place must be crawling with guys.
Kate: As a matter of fact, I do have a boyfriend.
Doug: Well there's a rough gig. What do you do, keep him chained up in the basement?
Kate: Hale at the moment is working in my father's London office, he's an MBA - Harvard. You might have heard of it. They do have a hockey team.
Doug: He must be a very smart guy.
Anton: First positions, please.
Doug: Bet you look pretty good from a few thousand miles away.

Kate: Who the hell do you think you are?
Doug: I know exactly who I am, sweetheart. I'm a guy who came a long way for lunch.
Kate: Well, please don't let me keep you from the trough.

Doug: Well, actually, it's kinda interesting.
Woman in Bar: I'll bet.
Drunk: Tell him.
Woman in Bar #2: We're waiting.
Doug: I- I b- I been doin' a little- I been doin' a little figure skating.
Drunk: Damn.
Man in Bar: What'd he say?
Walter Dorsey: You been doin' what?
Old man in back of bar: Finger painting?

Hale: I don't like to see her upset.
Doug: If I was you, I'd invest in blindfolds.

[On the First Olympic Skate Doug has the top button unbuttoned]
Kate: You are an immature asshole of the lowest order.
Doug: If it was forty below and that button meant the difference between a long satisfying life and a cold horrible death from hypothermia, I still wouldn't give you the satisfaction! Skate!

Kate: If you're so bored, why don't you read?
Doug: What, you mean like a book?
Kate: That is a traditionally accepted format, yes.
Doug: Is this the beginning of a conversation, here?
Kate: I was just simply asking if you knew how to read.
Doug: Yes. Doug can read.
Kate: What was the last book you read? You *were* in college?
Doug: The last thing I read in college was the letter canceling my scholarship when I couldn't play anymore.
Kate: Okay, high school.
Doug: I was a hockey player. The only thing I had to read was a scoreboard.
Kate: And they graduated you?
Doug: They revered me. I was a God.
Kate: What a tragic commentary on our times.

Doug: Hey, I'm sorry buddy, I wouldn't wish this on a snake. I'm outta here.
Anton: [shouts in Russian] Enough! Introduction is over, conversation finished! Mouths closed, ears to be opened.
[to Kate]
Anton: Pairs means *two*. You have no partner. You are skating nowhere.
[to Doug]
Anton: And where are you going? Ohh, back to Siberia? Skating on small pond is big excitement. And believe me, Gretzky, I am last person who is coming to look for you.
Anton: Good! We skate.

Calgary Cop: Name, son?
[as Doug is charging down the ramp to the arena, late for his Olympic hockey game]
Doug: Dorsey, U.S. Hockey!
Calgary Cop: Hell, son, they're just about to start!

Doug: Yeah, what's the deal - you goof on me, my brother buys you a beer?
Anton: What-what means 'goof'?

Doug: There's only two things I do really well, sweetheart, and skating's the other one!

[last lines]
Doug Dorsey: You didn't have to.
Kate Mosley: Yes, I did.
Doug Dorsey: Why?
Kate Mosley: Because I love you.
Doug Dorsey: Just remember who said it first.

Doug Dorsey: I was gonna tell you - that book you gave me, it's pretty good.
Kate Mosley: Really. Using it as a doorstop, or a coaster?

Doug Dorsey: Great Expectations.
Kate Mosley: Well, it was either that or "Curious George Plays Hockey". I took a chance.

[Doug drops Kate on her rear]
Kate: [shouting] You, you cretin!
Doug: Guess that move needs some work.

Doug Dorsey: [at the hospital after Kate hit his nose with a hockey puck] Toe pick!

[Doug is carrying Kate's flowers and walking her back to her room. The long program is the next day]
Doug: Man, this overnight thing is brutal. Why can't it be a double header, you know? Short program, long program. Same night, boom, we're outta here, you know what I mean?
Kate: Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.
Doug: It's like 'Enough already!' It's like... what's the word? Uh, y-you know what word I'm looking for? Wh-You know what I mean?
Kate: [trying to open her door] I don't know, uhhh, expectation?
Doug: No, no, when you, uh...
Kate: Anticipation? Excitement?
Doug: Foreplay!
Kate: [looks up in shock, stunned] Foreplay?
Doug: Yeah, you know, like foreplay.
Kate: Yeah, I know what it means.
Doug: Well, wouldn't you rather just get right to it?
Kate: What?
Doug: Skating. Long program.
[Kate stares, wide-eyed]
Doug: Chicago? Nationals?
[holds up her bouquet]
Doug: Flowers?
Kate: [still stunned, takes her flowers] Sleep. I'd rather sleep.
[She goes into her room, leaving Doug very confused outside]

Walter Dorsey: [after Doug has just told him he's been figure skating] Are they gonna make you shave your legs?
Doug Dorsey: Ah, screw this. I don't even know why...
Walter Dorsey: [laughs] Gotcha!

Doug: It's out.
Kate: It's in.
Doug: It's out.
Kate: It's in.
Doug: It's out!
Kate: It's in!
Doug: What difference does it make?
Kate: The difference is... I'm in the mood to kick a little ass.

Doug: Parlez-vous Olympics?

Doug: [Doug chases Kate into the hotel elevator] Kate! Kate, will you wait a minute? Kate! Kate! Kate! Kate!
Kate: Don't! Don't even try it! Just looking at you makes me sick! To think I was coming to apoligize! Lorie Peckarovski!
Doug: Were you, or were you not engaged to be married until last night?
Kate: Hardly the point.
Doug: You threw me out of your room!
Kate: Count your blessings. She may not have waited much longer!
Doug: That's not how it happened!
Kate: Spare me the details.
Doug: Where the hell do you get off?
Kate: *Me?*
Doug: This is my fault? From the first day I walk into your rink, you treat me like a hired hand! Then one night, you get drunk, I'm supposed to roll over and thank my lucky stars? I'm sorry, I don't downshift that fast!
Kate: Get out of my way!
Doug: No problem! I've been practicing that move for a year and a half!
[people are chuckling at them]
Doug: Blind date.

Kate: What were you planning on doing when your gladiatoring days were over?
Doug: You can bet your tights I never thought I'd be working a freak show like this.
Kate: I'm surprised you don't chuck it all and start your own think tank.

Doug: Don't say we are not right for each other, for the way is see it we might not be right for anybody else.

Doug: It can't be any harder to stay together than it was to stay apart.

Kate: An old shirt.
Doug: An old shirt? Bobby Hull wore that sweater. That's Bobby Hull's game sweater. That - I've had that 15 years. Bobby Hull.

Doug: [Unfamiliar with figure skates] Hey, what's the deal with these claws in the front here?
Anton: Is toe pick.
Doug: Toe pick? Let me guess, it has something to personal hygiene.
Kate: I wouldn't let that get in your way.
Doug: I don't let anything get in my way.

Doctor: You got a blind side, Doug. It's a permanent condition.
Doug Dorsey: So there's an operation, right?
Doctor: I'm afraid not.
Doug Dorsey: Some micro-laser thing. You open me up and...
Doctor: Doug, I've specialized in ophthalmic surgery for over 15 years.
Doug Dorsey: Okay, you don't do it, but somebody, somewhere, down in Mexico City, they shoot shark piss up your nose, you sit in traction for eight months.
Doctor: Doug... I'm sorry. I don't see professional hockey in your future.

Hale: I understand you've been giving Kate a rough time.
Doug Dorsey: You know Kate.
Hale: Yes, I do. And I don't like to see her upset.
Doug Dorsey: If I was you, I'd invest in blindfolds.

Lorie Peckarovski: Oh, we're definitely a team.
Brian Newman: Definitely.
Lorie Peckarovski: There's a real sense of togetherness.
Doug Dorsey: Spirit.
Lorie Peckarovski: Spirit. Family. It's,,, It's sort of,,, It's almost,,, It's almost...
Kate Mosley: Orgasmic.

The Cutting Edge: Going for the Gold (2006) (V)
Doug Dorsey: To win, you have to be willing to fail.

Doug Dorsey: [after seeing Alex pick up Jackie] How come we never had to do that?
Kate Mosley Dorsey: You were easier to train.