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Quotes for
Sturgis Turner (Character)
from "JAG" (1995)

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"JAG: Capital Crime (#7.12)" (2002)
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Why can't you two just get over it?
Mac: Because I'm in *love* with him!

Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: [speaking of Harm] Have you slept with him?
Mac: No!
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Is that the problem?
Mac: NO!
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Why can't you just get past it and move on?
Mac: Wouldn't work.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Why?
Mac: Because I'm in *love* with him!

"JAG: Back in the Saddle (#9.6)" (2003)
Lt. Col. Sarah 'Mac' MacKenzie: [Sturgis accused Mac of being conservative] My other faults? Since *you're* listing them.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Well you're sanctimonious. And a bit of a prig.
Lt. Col. Sarah 'Mac' MacKenzie: [incredulous] Where did *that* come from?
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: It's been building for a while.

"JAG: Family Business (#8.3)" (2002)
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: You asked me before to conceal the fact that you lied about being a Jew during the Mars case, and I've decided to do so. You have nothing to worry about.
Lt. Loren Singer: I appreciate it, sir.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: You are now Jewish as far as I'm concerned, as long as you act accordingly.
Lt. Loren Singer: What, you're going to hold me to it, sir?
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Every chance I get.
Lt. Loren Singer: Whatever turns you on, sir.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: [indicating his going-away gift to Loren] Go ahead, open it. It's called a mezuzah. It goes on the outside of your quarters.
Lt. Loren Singer: You're serious about this, Commander?
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: [smiling] Wait until Chanukah.

"JAG: Automatic for the People (#10.11)" (2005)
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: [discussing an incident in Bud's anger management class] There was a fight, you were there. And I'm not blaming you, but twice in as many months...
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: It's starting to sound like you're blaming me, Commander.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Bud, I defended you in court. I know better than anyone that you're not a violent man, but... for a mild-mannered guy, you sure do piss a lot of people off. Plus, uh... you've got a father who's a bully.
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: Ah, I've gone out of my way to be everything that my father isn't and none of the things that he is.

"JAG: Retrial (#10.3)" (2004)
SecNav Edward Sheffield: I don't see how I can help you, gentlemen.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: Sir, there has been a serious miscarriage of justice.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: Allegedly.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: Almost certainly, Mr. Secretary.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: At this point in time, only the president has the authority to order a retrial.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: Sir, you could suspend the remainder of Mr. Wainwright's sentence.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: But there's another recourse. File a writ of habeas corpus on the grounds that Wainwright's constitutional rights were denied due to a Brady violation.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: We considered that, sir. But it could take months for the federal district court to hear the arguments and issue a decision.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: I suggest keeping the president out of this.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: I'm aware that Congressman Bolton represents your home state, sir.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: And if he's guilty of misconduct, he's going to answer for it. But we can't afford to go after him, not now.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: Don't you mean not ever, sir?
SecNav Edward Sheffield: Watch your tone, Commander. Congressman Bolton is a ranking member of the House Armed Services Committee. And he's spearheading the opposition to the Navy's low-frequency active sonar project. If we go after him now, it smacks of retaliation.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Politics.
SecNav Edward Sheffield: Damn right, politics. The president's under a magnifying glass. He can't give his enemies anything to use against him. Maybe next year.
Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr.: Mr. Secretary, former Seaman Wainwright has spent the last twenty-two years of his life in prison for a crime he didn't commit, sir. Every day he remains there is an affront. He can't afford to wait until next year, sir.

"JAG: Shifting Sands (#9.2)" (2003)
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: [after Harm gets a phone call] Job offer?
Harmon 'Harm' Rabb Jr.: C.I.A. They want to see me tommorrow at 0800.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: What did you *do*, buddy?

"JAG: In Thin Air (#8.5)" (2002)
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Alcohol and carbon monoxide in the blood, even in minute amounts, can hasten hypoxia, correct?
Lt. Sam Albrecht: Yes, sir.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: According to the tox screen, Commander Zuzello had a carbon monoxide level of eleven percent per carboxy-hemoglobin and a blood alcohol level of .009. Now, this is fine if you're driving a car, but in an F-14 with a compromised oxygen system...
Lt. Sam Albrecht: Commander Zuzello didn't do anything wrong, sir.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Wrong, no, but for a man who nearly failed his hypoxia demo, smoking and drinking the night before a mission, wouldn't you consider this unwise, Lieutenant?
Lt. Sam Albrecht: It's easy to judge now, sir. It's also easy to blame someone who's not here to defend himself.

"JAG: Camp Delta (#10.7)" (2004)
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: I just got off the phone with the Fairfax County Commonwealth Attorney's Office. Care to venture a guess about who we talked about?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: Me, sir?
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: You, sir. He informed me the Commonwealth of Virginia is charging you with assault.
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: So I've heard, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: So you've heard? Were you ever going to tell me?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: I didn't want to burden you with my personal problems, General.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: A JAG officer brawling in public is not a "personal problem", Commander Roberts. When he's in uniform under my command, it's my problem. Did you know about this?
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: No, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: Did you attack this civilian?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: Yes and no, sir. Uh, he attacked my brother with a shoe, and I was trying...
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: A-a shoe?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: Yes, sir, a-a-a heavy shoe: a wing-tipped Oxford.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: Why?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: The gentleman had said some disparaging remarks about the military. My brother Mikey's a midshipman at the Academy. He took offense, heated words were exchanged, and...
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: So you hit a wing-tip wielding history teacher because he insulted the Navy?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: Well, not just the Navy, sir. The Marine Corps, as well.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: Are you trying to manipulate me, Commander?
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: No, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: If you're convicted, your naval career is over. You know that.
Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts: I expect to be acquitted, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: [to Sturgis] You're a member of the Virginia Bar, Commander. You'll volunteer as defense counsel.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Aye aye, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: Make this go away.
Cmdr. Sturgis Turner: Do my best, sir.
Maj. Gen. Gordon 'Biff' Cresswell: After the civilians are done with you, Commander Roberts, it'll be my turn.