Coach Whitey Durham
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Quotes for
Coach Whitey Durham (Character)
from "One Tree Hill" (2003)

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"One Tree Hill: Pilot (#1.1)" (2003)
Dan Scott: You're full of crap.
Coach Whitey Durham: It comes with old age, Danny, constipation.

Dan Scott: Nathan. Remember, 20 shots - no less.
Nathan Scott: Got it, Dad.
Coach Whitey Durham: Quit yakking and warm up.

Coach Whitey Durham: Scott.
Nathan: Sup coach?
Coach Whitey Durham: Not you.
[looks at Lucas]
Coach Whitey Durham: You.
[looks at Nathan]
Coach Whitey Durham: You go read a book or something.

Coach Whitey Durham: Nice, isn't it? A lot of people like their gyms loud. I like mine like this: quiet, clean... kind of like a church. A lot of praying done here, anyway. You played ball in grade school. Why'd you quit?
Lucas 'Luke' Scott: I didn't.
Coach Whitey Durham: [chuckling] What, four guys in a park? That's not exactly basketball.
Lucas 'Luke' Scott: Then what do you think we're doin' out there?
Coach Whitey Durham: I don't know. Planning a bank job? Look, I've got an opening in my lineup. Varsity. Chance of a lifetime. What do you say?
Lucas 'Luke' Scott: I say those people that pray here waste their time. God doesn't watch sports.


"One Tree Hill: The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most (#1.2)" (2003)
Coach Whitey Durham: You want to know something? I have had 35 winning seasons, but you know what keeps me up at night? The college jobs I never took. Could-have-beens have a way of doing that.

Coach Whitey Durham: There's no shame in being afraid. Hell, we're all afraid. What you gotta do is figure out what you're afraid of because when you put a face on it you can beat it. Better yet, you can use it.

Coach Whitey Durham: I'd stand up, but every time I do somebody kicks me in the ass for putting you on the team.


"One Tree Hill: Are You True? (#1.3)" (2003)
Coach Whitey Durham: [He sees a naked Lucas with two basketballs trying to cover himself up] I was just getting used to low-waist jeans. Lets go, ball boy.

Coach Whitey Durham: Oh, by the way, there's a half naked girl in the back seat of your car. I just thought you'd like to know.


"One Tree Hill: The Leaving Song (#1.21)" (2004)
Coach Whitey Durham: [Whitey and Dan walk past and see Lucas and Nathan lifting weights together and laughing] Most fathers would be touched by this moment but I'm guessing it's your worst nightmare.


"One Tree Hill: All Tomorrow's Parties (#3.14)" (2006)
Keith Scott: Whitey, what are you doing in our room?
Coach Whitey Durham: Don't you mean our room? Oh, the two of you shacked up together in sin. That's a bad example to the children. Ya oughta be ashamed of yourselves.
Karen Roe: But, uh...
Coach Whitey Durham: Oh, don't worry Karen. I'll take good care of him. Well, what have we got here? Mmmm... truffles.


"One Tree Hill: Things I Forgot at Birth (#4.2)" (2006)
Coach Whitey Durham: Not long ago, I found a kid out on that very same court. If that young man turns out to be the kind of player and person that scrawny kid turned out to be, it's a no-brainer.


"One Tree Hill: Truth Doesn't Make a Noise (#2.2)" (2004)
Coach Whitey Durham: Well, well, Avril Lavigne.


"One Tree Hill: Who Will Survive, and What Will Be Left of Them (#3.17)" (2006)
Coach Whitey Durham: Most of the time, the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wished for. Maybe, you'll get more than you ever could've imagined. Who knows where life will take you, the road is long, and in the end... the journey is the destination.


"One Tree Hill: Truth, Bitter Truth (#2.8)" (2004)
Jake Jaglieski: Sorry I'm late, Coach.
Coach Whitey Durham: Why should today be any different, Jageilski? Move your ass. The rest of you ladies start defense drills, pronto.
[walk out]
Nathan: Why is coach so easy on you, Jageilski?
Tim Smith: If I'm late I get wind sprints.
Jake Jaglieski: We party together.
Tim Smith: Maybe they're lovers.
Nathan: [to Tim and Jake] Why, did you two break up?
[Nathan and Tim leave]
Lucas: So, anyway, man, what's the deal? What's going on? You know, you're out sick all the time, and you come in late and cut out early. I don't understand. Coach just lets you.
Jake Jaglieski: [getting changed] Just helping me out.
Lucas: Meaning?
Jake Jaglieski: Meaning he's just helping me out.
Lucas: All right.
[Lucas leaves and Jake leans against his locker and sighs]


"One Tree Hill: Every Night Is Another Story (#1.6)" (2003)
Coach Whitey Durham: Alright! Knock it off. This is our first away game. For those of you who are unfamiliar, you sit there with your mouths shut and focus. I'll choose the music! Tonight's theme is defense.
[Music starts. Everybody smiles faintly and put on their headphones]


"One Tree Hill: The Search for Something More (#1.8)" (2003)
Jake Jaglieski: Sorry I'm late, Coach.
Coach Whitey Durham: Why should today be any different, Jageilski? Move your ass. The rest of you ladies start defense drills, pronto.
[walk out]
Nathan: Why is coach so easy on you, Jageilski?
Tim Smith: If I'm late I get wind sprints.
Jake Jaglieski: We party together.
Tim Smith: Maybe they're lovers.
Nathan: [to Tim and Jake] Why, did you two break up?
[Nathan and Tim leave]
Lucas: So, anyway, man, what's the deal? What's going on? You know, you're out sick all the time, and you come in late and cut out early. I don't understand. Coach just lets you.
Jake Jaglieski: [getting changed] Just helping me out.
Lucas: Meaning?
Jake Jaglieski: Meaning he's just helping me out.
Lucas: All right.
[Lucas leaves and Jake leans against his locker and sighs]


"One Tree Hill: First Day on a Brand New Planet (#3.3)" (2005)
Coach Whitey Durham: Well, well, Avril Lavigne.


"One Tree Hill: I've Got Dreams to Remember (#3.12)" (2006)
Coach Whitey Durham: Alright now, I want you guys to take a good look around you. Take a good, hard look, because once in a while you have to ask yourself how you got to this place. 0 for 2, playing in this crummy sweat-box of a gym. Well, I'll tell you how you got there. You got there by playing selfishly and losing. But for the next nine seconds, if you change the first thing, you'll change the second. Alright, let's go. One, two, three...
Ravens: RAVENS!


"One Tree Hill: Locked Hearts and Hand Grenades (#3.6)" (2005)
Coach Whitey Durham: [Breaking up a fight between Bevin and Ashley] Alright Paris and Nicole, that's quite enough. If I wanted to watch cheerleaders wrestle I'd turn on pay-per-view.


"One Tree Hill: Like You Like an Arsonist (#3.1)" (2005)
Coach Whitey Durham: I thought fire was supposed to be Satan's friend.


"One Tree Hill: Just Watch the Fireworks (#3.15)" (2006)
Coach Whitey Durham: [on present time-capsule] It's been fifty years, fifty long years since I've done this. Looking back on what I said all those years ago, all the hopes and dreams I had, I've come to the conclusion that if having things turn out the way you wanted them to is a measure of a successful life, then some would say I'm a failure. The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments. Learn to let go of the past. And recognize that every day won't be sunny, and when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair, remember it's only in the black of night you see the stars. And those stars will lead you back home. So don't be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble and fall, cause most of the time, the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wish for. Maybe you'll get more than you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you. The road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination.


"One Tree Hill: A Multitude of Casualties (#3.5)" (2005)
Coach Whitey Durham: [while Dan gives a speech before Midnight Madness] Lord, lord; where is Lee Harvey Oswald when we need him?