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Quotes for
Lou (Character)
from Back to School (1986)

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Back to School (1986)
Player #1: Hey, Lutz! You know who I am?
Derek: Um, let me see. Uh, protruding supra-orbital ridges.
[the football player picks up Derek by his shirt]
Derek: Small cranium. Uh, 1300 cc brain. Hmmm. Neanderthal Man!
Player #1: [to Jason] You. I want you to call his mother. You tell her he's never coming home.
Jason Melon: Whoah. Hold it, hold it. You sure you even got the right guy? I mean, look how many people got blue hair these days. You know?
Player #1: Shut up, meat-head!
Thornton Melon: Hey, take it easy, will ya? I mean, the war's over. Get new parts for your head.
Player #1: Yeah? Wanna make something of it?
Thornton Melon: Oh, no, no. I never get physical. I just get upset. And when I get upset...
Thornton Melon: [points at Lou] HE gets physical.
[Lou takes a metal napkin holder and crushes it with one hand]
Lou: [stepping up to the player] You got a problem?
Player #1: No. I haven't got a problem.
Lou: Well, now you do.
[Lou slugs the football player in the stomach, resulting in a full scale bar brawl with the football team]

Thornton Melon: Home, Sweet Home.
Lou: I liked the old house better.
Thornton Melon: So did I.
Lou: I liked the old wife better, too!
Thornton Melon: [laughs] Lay off Vanessa. She gives great headache. Lou, I can't believe it. Married five years. Seems like yesterday!
Thornton Melon: [sighs] And you know what a lousy day yesterday was.

[watching his TV commercial]
Thornton Melon: Lou, did you see the new spot?
Lou: Yeah, I seen it.
Thornton Melon: Do I look fat in it?
Lou: You could lose a couple of pounds.
Thornton Melon: I've gotta get bigger actors.

Lou: Come here. I want to tell you something.
Jason Melon: What?
Lou: You were pretty hard on your father last night.
Jason Melon: I know, but the guy doesn't understand.
Lou: I know your pop thirty years. He understands. He's a nice guy, and he's tough. Like me. I'm nice, and I'm tough. I'll give you an idea what I mean. My two boys, I put one through college and the other I put through a wall. Your papa loves you. He's lookin' out for ya. Look out for him.