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: This is great I never win at checkers. Mike
: Well, it's kinda easy to win when you NEVER MOVE YOUR BACK ROW!
: Are you or are you not the Black Angel of Death?
: I'm just dandy, I got a bowl of chocolate pudding in my underpants. Steve
: We didn't have any pudding in there buddy.
: I'm not far from dragging you out of the car and beating you to dust. Steve
: You should work up to that, kinda leaves you nowhere to go.
: [on Drake Sabitch
] This guy is like Leatherface, Chucky and Jan Brady all rolled into one.
[the roof has blown off the house and it begins to hail all over Mike who is in the top bunk
: Hey Mike, 'I got dibs on top' Ha ha. Mike
: Shut up! Steve
: Ha ha ha ha ha. Mike
: Why don't you shut up? Steve
: Heh heh, 'Hello Washington'. Ha ha ha. Mike
: SHUT UP!
: What the hell was that? Steve
: A chunk in the road or something. Mike
: I just chunked in my pants.
[Steve comes back sprayed with a fire extinguisher
: Whoa, what happened to you? Did you fall into some mud or something? Steve
: Yeah, I did. And now I'm gonna be famous because I'm the only one in the world who knows where you can find *white* mud.
[Mike is pretending to be a cop, Steve is pretending to be a prisoner
: Ro-ads. Ro-ods. Mike
: Quiet back there! I've taken enough guff from you for one day!
[turns to state trooper
: Raving psycho! Butchered 400 chickens and screwed a beagle. I'm taking him back to Nevada where he's wanted for banging horses!
[a bat flies out at them
: What the heck is that? Mike
: Ah! It's Ozzy Osborne!
: [completely wasted on the nitrous oxide
] ... But, this map is heavy... It's got all of those... robes on it. Robes? Rogues? Mike
: [also stoned; giggling
] Roads! Steve
: Aahahahaha! Mike
: [suddenly stops laughing
] I'm stoned... so are you!
[looks in the backseat
: Dammit! The nitrous oxide's leaking into the car! OK, calm down... we just gotta keep under the speed limit... limit...
[starts giggling again
: Limit! Haha, that's another one of those freaky words!
: Man! This place is trashed! Steve
: Check this out! This whole fridge is held up here just by this plug!
[unplugs the fridge, letting it slide toward Mike, pinning him against the wall
: You OK? Mike
: I'm just dandy! I got a bowl of chocolate pudding in my underpants! Steve
: We didn't have any pudding in there, buddy.