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Quotes for
Agent Simon Donovan (Character)
from "The West Wing" (1999)

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"The West Wing: We Killed Yamamoto (#3.21)" (2002)
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: 'Cause I'm thinking if someone's coming for you they probably don't have a bulls-eye on them.
Agent Simon Donovan: They do if I'm guarding you.

Agent Simon Donovan: Are you going to your gym tonight?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: What?
Agent Simon Donovan: Are you working out?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: I thought you said "do you want to have gin tonight?".
Agent Simon Donovan: No
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: I can't go to my gym. My gym's flooded.
Agent Simon Donovan: What about the White House gym?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: It closes at 7.
Agent Simon Donovan: You could use ours, its just a couple of blocks...
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Is it a good gym?
Agent Simon Donovan: Yes, its a...
[pauses in frustration]
Agent Simon Donovan: We run alongside moving cars.
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: You don't have to get snobby about it.
Agent Simon Donovan: Would you like to use our gym?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Yes, thank you.
[She nods]
Agent Simon Donovan: Good Morning.
[He turns and goes]

Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: [after Simon has put 3 shots from his gun in the dead center of the bullseye] How do you shoot like that?
Agent Simon Donovan: They give us lessons.

Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: So, what have you got?
Agent Simon Donovan: Excuse me?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Marksmanship wise. What have you got?
Agent Simon Donovan: Well, I can fire a gun without falling down, if that's what you're asking.


"The West Wing: The Black Vera Wang (#3.20)" (2002)
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: There's no way you're letting me walk out the door, so what is it we're doing?
Agent Simon Donovan: I'm sorry?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: What's your plan for me?
Agent Simon Donovan: I don't have a plan.
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: You're gonna let me drive myself home?
Agent Simon Donovan: No. I've got your spark plug. Is that what you meant?
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: You've got my spark plug?
Agent Simon Donovan: And the battery. Also the fuel pump, starter relay, timing belt, the ignition fuse, and, well, also the engine I guess.
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Did you leave me anything?
Agent Simon Donovan: Wiper fluid.

Hogan Cregg: So, what would it take for you to brandish your weapon?
Agent Simon Donovan: What? I mean, excuse me?
Hogan Cregg: What would it take for you to just reach in and brandish your weapon?
Agent Simon Donovan: Something pretty extraordinary.

Hogan Cregg: So what is it that you look for?
Agent Simon Donovan: You know it when you see it.
Hogan Cregg: What do you mean?
Agent Simon Donovan: [Leads Hogan to a more open area. As he speaks, he moves her by the shoulders in a circle] Look this way. Now look this way. Now look this way.
[Turns her to face him]
Agent Simon Donovan: Now look at me. What did you see?
Hogan Cregg: Uh... over here there was a mother with two kids. Over here there was a man in a coat, and I can't remember what else. And over here was the check out counter and there were some people over there and I can't remember what else.
Agent Simon Donovan: Anything bother you?
Hogan Cregg: No.
Agent Simon Donovan: What about the guy in the coat?
Hogan Cregg: What about him?
Agent Simon Donovan: It's May. Why's he wearing a coat?
Hogan Cregg: I don't know.
Agent Simon Donovan: I don't know either. But until one of us leaves this store I'm always going to know where he is.


"The West Wing: Enemies Foreign and Domestic (#3.19)" (2002)
[Discussing C.J.'s security detail]
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: You can't come in the briefing room.
Agent Simon Donovan: A crowded room where anyone can get credentialed and you're up at the podium? No, I'm pretty sure I'll be there.
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: This is what you meant by "I'm the boss?"
Agent Simon Donovan: Ah, yeah, I guess that's more of an honorary thing.

Agent Simon Donovan: [to C.J. about her protection] By the way, I can't guarantee anything, except to say that if you're dead, chances are I am too.


"The West Wing: Posse Comitatus (#3.22)" (2002)
Agent Simon Donovan: [holding a gun on a bank robber] Don't reach! I'm Secret Service. You know you'll never get there.

Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: I'm standing in the middle of the President's security detail. What do you think's gonna happen to me?
Agent Simon Donovan: [Raising his voice] I don't know what's gonna happen to you. If I did, this would be easy!
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Well, maybe if we didn't shout so much.
Agent Simon Donovan: I have spent my adult life protecting people. You're the first person who's got me seriously thinking about switching sides!
Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: Oh, I'm sorry you feel that way. I think I've been a treat.
Agent Simon Donovan: Oh, yes you have. A little Easter treat just for me.