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: Oh dear. Honey Pie
: What? What's he doing? Bozo
: They're humping! Beer Guy
: Aw man! The monsters are doing it doggy style. Hot Wheels
: Monster sex.
: [Re: first monster trapped and killed
] Jeez, it took all that? All those bullets? Beer Guy
: That's the LITTLE one? We can't fight these things! No way! Heroine
: We can still fight them. We just gotta be clever. Coach
: Maybe we don't have to fight them at all. Bozo
: Yeah, why don't we just call 'em names.
: Any more ideas, Animal Planet? Coach
: I-I was just being proactive! Bartender
: Hey Dipshit, I didn't see you helpin' did I... Bozo
: Oh, go douche, Grandpa! Beer Guy
: What now? Tuffy
: We're stuck in here, that's what.
: [Locked in bedroom as monster is coming through window
] Okay! I'm ready to come out now! Bartender
: [Bartender fumbles outside with key; it breaks in the lock
] Oh. Bozo
: [Panicking, rattling doorknob
] OH? WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "OH"? Coach
: [Relatively calmly. i.e. oh, shit
] Cheese and crackers.
: [Both peering outside through secret hatch door in the dark basement
] You know, you and I have a lot of similarities. Strong. Resolute... Heroine
: You need to be quiet. Coach
: I'm sorry. I talk when I'm nervous. Heroine
: Quiet. Coach
: It's just, it's been a while since someone's been horribly killed, and it seems like an opportune time for someone to be... well... offed. Heroine
: What did I say? Shh. Coach
: Sorry. I'm done now. Coach
: [Hoisting himself out the hatch door
] Great men will tell of my bravery.
: Whoa. Monster cock.
: We got your front, bro. Bozo
: It's your back, we got your back.