Maxxx Orbison
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Quotes for
Maxxx Orbison (Character)
from Orgazmo (1997)

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Orgazmo (1997)
Maxxx Orbison: Yeah, I just dig that Jesus guy!

Maxxx Orbison: Put your tongue in her mouth, for Christ's sake!
Joe Young: How would Christ benefit from me putting my tongue in someone's mouth?

Maxxx Orbison: Bring me my stunt cock.

[Joe is introduced to the young actresses he'll be co-starring with]
Joe Young: Oh... I, I can't say that.
Maxxx Orbison: Say what?
Joe Young: What are they called?
Maxxx Orbison: The Assfuck Twins.
Joe Young: I can't say that. Can we call them something else?
Maxxx Orbison: But they're the Assfuck Twins.
Joe Young: Well I know, but um, couldn't I call them the Naughty Twins or something?
Maxxx Orbison: No, you *couldn't* just call them the Naughty Twins. They're the Assfuck Twins. Why would you call them The Naughty Twins when they get fucked in the ass all the time?
Joe Young: Well, that's pretty naughty.

Maxxx Orbison: What's your name, again?
Sancho: I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: Look, I get a lot of people auditioning all the time. What makes you think that you'd be good enough for porno?
Sancho: I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: Great... but what do you do?
Sancho: What do I do? I am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: And...?
Sancho: And there are many Jeffs in the world, and many Toms as well. But I... am Sancho.
Maxxx Orbison: And...?
Sancho: Are you Sancho? No you are not. Neither is Scott Baio Sancho. Frank Gifford is not Sancho. But I...
Maxxx Orbison: You... are Sancho!
Sancho: That's right.
Maxxx Orbison: Okay, you're hired.

Lisa: [to Maxxx] You pig, you're responsible for degrading all of those women.
Clark: Equally degradable in pornographic films.
Lisa: Men are always in a position of power.
Rodgers: They're the ones who want the product so bad, they're the victims.
Lisa: Well, it exploits men by exploiting women.
Clark: Hence, it exploits people.
Maxxx Orbison: [pissed off] SHUT UP!
Clark: Yeah.
Maxxx Orbison: I do what i do and i make a lot of money and i don't care what i do to people because they're all idiots.
Clark: Yeah.
Maxxx Orbison: Especially you Clark, you pig fucking hunk of shit!.
Clark: Yeah.

Maxxx Orbison: You get me some nice close-ups... and you give me a nice slow zoom, starting with a medium closeup on the cock... and then widening out to an establishing shot.
Camera Man: Genius.

Maxxx Orbison: Okay people, let's go! Lights on!
Dave the Lighting Guy: Lights are on. It's stable, Captain, Woohoo! Let's see some fuckin' action!
Maxxx Orbison: Dave?
Dave the Lighting Guy: Yeah?
Maxxx Orbison: Calm down.
Dave the Lighting Guy: Right. Sorry.

Interviewer: What's the difference between Orgazmo and your previous porn titles, like Schindler's Fist?
Maxxx Orbison: I really think history will describe Orgazmo better than I possibly could.

Doctor: Your testicles have grown to the size of Florida oranges.
Maxxx Orbison: Don't you think I notice THAT? Tell me something I don't know, you cocky PRICK!
Doctor: I am going to have to amputate your pee pee.

T-Rex: Hi fellas, I'm ready to fuck.
Orgazmo: Huh?
T-Rex: You want me on top?
Orgazmo: Uh... NO! I'll be on top!
T-Rex: You're gonna make me cum, or I'm gonna kick your butt!
Maxxx Orbison: Aaaand... action!
[T-Rex throws Orgazmo down and starts dry humping him]
T-Rex: Oh! Come on nah! Come on nah! You make me so hot nah! You make me so hot!

Maxxx Orbison: Okay, we're sucking, we're sucking...
Dave the Lighting Guy: Yeah! SUCK THAT COCK!

Saffi: Who will I be fucking in this scene?
Maxxx Orbison: Um, you'll be fucking Ben and Rodgers. By the way, this is our new Orgazmo.
Saffi: Hi. Are we fucking?
Maxxx Orbison: No, we'll be bringing in a stunt cock.
Saffi: And I'm NOT doing any ass-licking in this scene!
Maxxx Orbison: Yes, yes, no ass-licking!
Saffi: I'm not an ass-licker!
[Walks away]
Maxxx Orbison: [shaking his head] Give 'em an inch, and they take a mile.

Lisa: Men like you make me sick! Jesus is going to put an end to you.
Maxxx Orbison: If Jesus Christ wants to bring Maxxx Oribson down, he's going to need a lot of help.

[repeated line]
Maxxx Orbison: Or else you'll be sleeping with the fishes. See?