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: Let's say there was a burning building and you could rush in and you could save only one thing: either the last known copy of Shakespeare's plays or some anonymous human being. What would you do?
] I have never had a play produced. That's right. And I've written one play a year for the past twenty years. David Shayne
: Yes, but that's because you're a genius. And the proof is that both common people and intellectuals find your work completely incoherent. Means you're a genius.
: Hey, look who's here. The big Broadway success. I don't write hits. My plays are art. They're written specifically to go unproduced.
: I've become involved with Helen Sinclair, and I feel terrible. But I can't help myself. She's so charismatic, and she's brilliant and beautiful. I mean, a real artist, and, and we speak the same language. Sheldon Flender
: You're wracked with guilt. David Shayne
: I'm wracked with guilt. Sheldon Flender
: You're wracked with guilt. You are wracked with guilt. David Shayne
: I don't know whether... I can't sleep. Sheldon Flender
: Guilt is petit-bourgeois crap. An artist creates his own moral universe. David Shayne
: I know that. I know... Sheldon Flender
: Well? What is the problem then? I'm gonna give you some advice. The same advice that was given to me many years ago when I had a very similar dilemma. David Shayne
: Similar to mine. To... Sheldon Flender
: Yes. Yes. David Shayne
: What did you do? What? Sheldon Flender
: You gotta do what you gotta do.
: You, you, you're all missing the point, the point is I can give pleasure many times a day! Rita
: Oh, now, really Flender, what does quantity got to do with it? Sheldon Flender
: Quantity, quantity affects quality! David Shayne
: Says who? Sheldon Flender
: Karl Marx! Rita
: Oh, so now we're talking economics. Sheldon Flender
: Sex is economics!